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After you drop the kids off or put them to bed, turn on “Childish”. Hosted by real life friends, parents and award-winning podcasters Greg Fitzsimmons (Fitzdog Radio) and Alison Rosen (Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend), Childish will help you laugh about the struggles and joys of parenthood, grow closer to your children, learn something useful and maybe even put the spark back into your love life. This is safe for work. As long as you work in a meat packing plant.
The podcast Childish is created by Greg Fitzsimmons, Alison Rosen. The podcast and the artwork on this page are embedded on this page using the public podcast feed (RSS).
Greg is down under in South Africa and Alison tries to figure whether she bought enough presents for the kids.
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Parents are naming their kids after dogs and Alison’s review of Wicked. Plus Greg finds the cure for depression.
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A debate rages about buying your Thanksgiving turkey and we ponder what our legacies will be. Plus “Ask Erin” and drama in Tempe!
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In an effort to bring the country together, we talk about the joys and tribulations of parenting. Plus, are you a "living room" family?
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Greg and Alison both have wild nights but one of their kids gets the dreaded head lice.
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Greg and Alison talk about saying yes to things in life. And the joy of dog snuggling.
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A new debate about white noise for babies and should you get mad at your friend for birthing on your couch?
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Alison's circle expands and Greg's worried he's going to eat cat food. Plus Ask Erin, the worst couple online, and particularly troubling parenting low.
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A new study shows that laughter is very healthy for parents and children. Let's just say this episode is an elixir.
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Greg and Alison are together again! Greg is spread thin and Alison's test strip is thicc. Plus tips to ease into the first week of school.
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Greg’s experience being cattle prodded by a shoe shine guy and Alison’s trip to Japan! Plus a vocab quiz.
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Growing up with drunk dads and breaking the cycle. Plus parenting advice for the rich!
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Today it’s health class for Greg. Plus we hear from Melvin!
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Greg is mentoring people and Elliot has a new passion.
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Alison gets a puppy and Greg prepares to celebrate his 25th anniversary. Plus drowsy driving!
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Alison is building muscle while Greg heads to Vegas to see The Dead.
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Greg and Alison’s highs soar to the zenith of parenting possibility’s this week while you may want to fast forward through the lows.
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While Greg was staring at the sun in Mexico, Alison was taking a child to surgery.
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Greg has a lonely week while Alison is reminded of the importance of friendship.
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We talk about St Paddy’s Day adventures and being shaken down by Walgreens. Alison has always been hot but now she is really heating up.
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Greg can't catch a break and Elliot's party is a success but takes it out of Alison. Plus do we want our spouses to remarry should anything happen to us?
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A rainy Wednesday in LA gives us a chance to put an end to all the conversations about Taylor Swift. Also swaddling facts from Erin!
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Elliot fights to bring his brother to Universal and Greg fights to keep his sanity by running in the pouring rain.
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As Greg’s recovers from his daughter's party, Alison plans one for her son. Plus a possible cure for morning sickness and a surprising Super Bowl stat.
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We pay off last year’s predictions, make new ones for this year, and we defend Jo Koy.
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Greg recently performed in the Bluegrass State and left a little something behind. Also he's gotten permission to visit a nude spa in Portland and he's planning on going all in. He and Alison discuss the awards they expect to receive for their bravery, the sanctimoniousness of awards shows, talking to your kids about the news, Evita (again), traveling, discipline and so much more. Plus news about "looping" teacher, Generation Alpha, and your emails.
Alison talks about the adjustment to holidays without her father and Greg’s wife gives doula advice.
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Happy Thanksgiving! We’ll be back with a brand new episode in two weeks but in the meantime, we’re revisiting this classic Childish:
A mysterious pain is haunting Jimmy's left testicle! We endeavor to get to the bottom of it in this episode featuring our first intentional studio guest. He joins us to recap Valentine's day, discuss being the parent of an only child, talk airplane squabbles, birthstones, catchphrases, McDonald's meal options, financial indiscretions and more.
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Greg and Alison give a round up of Halloween. Alison tried to be present with her kids while Greg introduces a new segment.
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Halloween is upon us like a cold water bidet in a warm pumpkin patch.
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Greg stays in a roach motel and Alison wonders how old is too old to trick or treat.
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Alison is upgrading her dental game and Greg is loving Venice beach. Plus an eleven year old goes on a joy ride.
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Greg and Alison weigh in on the Jimmy Fallon controversy and whether Jessica Simpson’s daughter should be allowed to dress provocatively. Plus Greg gets pitched a time share.
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Greg and Alison reunite after a month apart to discuss what family really means. Also Greg describes what Irish acceptance is, Alison's in her bathrobe era, and O2 wants to know where people go when they die.
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Greg will return to Mallorca where he once fell in love for an hour and a half. Plus Alison is still grieving but finding solace in her memories of her father.
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Bob Saget joins the show to talk about parenting three adult daughters, discussing racism with children, barnyard porn, cooking, his new podcast Bob Saget's Here for You and more. We also talk about Owen (O-2)'s first steps and some tough decisions about preschools reopening.
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In the competition for lowest low, Alison finally scores big!
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Owen is independent of diapers (sorta) and Greg is independent of his pilot deal. Plus a mysterious chicken shows up on Greg’s doorstep.
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Father's Day is all around us. Greg shared his big feelings about listening to his father's old radio tapes and Alison talks about her son's Father's Day cards or lack thereof. Plus Greg effortlessly out-lows Alison once again.
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O2 is sleeping in his own room and O1 is back from college and sleeping in his own room as well. Greg is picketing with the Writer's Guild. This podcast was not written by AI. Plus how to talk to your kids after school and a nepo baby who broke her own water.
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While Erin's away, Greg does not play. Alison chaperones a pack of wild kids and Kim Kardashian struggles with raising her children.
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Spring is here, kids are out, dogs are biting. Greg and Alison celebrate the quality of their other podcasts while honoring each other and the symbiosis that is Childish. Plus a couple that isn't teaching their kids to read and write and the popularity of road trips.
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Alison's boys are hitting milestones this week and Greg is going to take magic mushrooms. Plus a picnic is in the works for all the listeners.
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A special appearance from Greg's mother and a mysterious corn dish is served at Easter. Plus Hillary Swank's twins and a tip to keep your kids safe in the pool.
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No talking about menstruation in Florida schools, period. O2 spends the night in his own bed. O1 is home from college. And someone's got a hemorrhoid!
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Alison and family are getting a lot of use out of Greg's corroded piano while Greg prepares for his St. Patrick's Day show. Will Alison finally show up? Plus parents who lied about their children's Covid status and a father who's dismayed by his daughter's new line of work.
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We brave the California storms to bring you tales of Bert Kreischer's tour bus and Owen's nocturnal wanderings. Plus parents are moving in with their adult kids and school will be starting later.
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Greg gets his feelings hurt on Valentine's Day and Alison has become a social butterfly. Plus appropriate age for social media, school lunch results and we tease next week's episode when Alison reveals her fetishes.
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We talk about how to make friends as an adult and whether or not those friendships should become a polyamorous foursome. Or an unconsummated threesome. Plus Marie Kondo becomes a slob just like us.
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Childish is here to teach and this week's lesson is don't name your baby Adolf and don't procreate after the age of 50.
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We pay off last year's predictions (Alison's back door) and make predictions for next year (also, Alison's back door).
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Rounding out 2022 we go deep into family struggles and our love for our children. Plus give the nepo babies a break and don't become estranged from your parents.
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Will Alison lose her husband to Mrs. Claus this year and will Greg's farting lead to divorce? Plus the baby pillow you should toss and why Australian body builders want your breast milk.
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We give thanks to our families, our loved ones and the less fortunate. Plus Alison is upset at a balloon vendor and Greg is questioning Emily Ratajkowski's life choices.
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We talk about losing Powerball and possibly losing the election but winning the podcast. Our hearts go out to Tom and Giselle as they divvy up their 700 million dollars.
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Alison talks about the big family costume for this year's Halloween as Greg recounts ghostly tales from the 80s.
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As Alison struggles to balance her family and work life, Greg struggles to sell out his show in Chicago so his son doesn't think he’s a failure. Plus the importance of family dinners and the horrific experience of checking for pinworms.
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Greg's at a fancy unnamed hotel in Austin trying to heal after the loss of the queen while Alison's doctor is treating her like a hand puppet. Adam Levine is featured as the douche of the week and we give out advice about hitting puberty late.
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Greg is saving human lives while Alison is trying to exterminate termites. With both boys in school, Alison has taken her first step toward being an empty nester.
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It's been a rough week. Alison took a spill and Greg got soaked. Plus news stories about parents who cross the line with teachers, inspirational Barbies, Hillary Duff's bowels and more!
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After revealing a mortifying pet name he'd somehow kept under wraps, Greg tells Alison about an upcoming family visit. Alison hides in a bush as Elliot heads to Kindergarten and a listener calls Greg's bluff.
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Tom Brady's 250 million is getting in the way of his parenting. It's okay not to breastfeed for two years and the kids are going to bed early. Plus our podcasting war is heating up by cooling down.
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One of our listeners calls off a fatwa and another has some questions about gambling involving our children. Alison's family is getting over covid and Greg's family is mourning a loss. Plus Sesame Street may have become a sundown town and parents are going wild now that kids are at camp.
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After a few chuckles about Roe v Wade, we take a quiz about what women were allowed to do in 1971. You'd be shocked. Plus Greg has a hot take on The Kardashians and Owen gives Alison a bloody nose.
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Greg and Alison explode with summer mania, talking about everything from having a goth child to long distance calls from Cuba and going to the beach to watch a drum circle. Plus the Property Brothers, Zooey Deschanel and spanking.
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You can lead Owen to the toilet but you can't make him poop. An update on formula, a debate about team sports, and William and Kate's child is a royal pain in the ass. Plus new pens for Big Al.
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After addressing our most recent school tragedy, we move on to talk about sibling rivalry and give you an update on baby formula. Plus high pressure game nights, a table read, snoring, and one of our Owens has Covid!
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Baby formula is in short supply but here's what you can do about it. Also James Van Der Beek's mom may be visiting from the afterlife. Elliot and O2 are chanting some pretty racy things and the Fitzdog is struggling to make summer plans.
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Guinness has a new tallest family in the world. Half of parents are still supporting their adult children. Greg has a fan who's nuts for nuts and Alison is fretting about where to send Elliot to school.
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Girl Scouts, Boy Scouts or together, whose side are you on? Plus burnout explorers, an update on Greg's nuts, an email from an almond, traveling with a three year old, Greg's trip to Chicago, your calls and parents against football. And someone is now standing up to pee!
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Are Greg and Alison jealous of each other's phase of parenting? Plus a bill to get rid of the time change, edibles that look like children's candy, fantasy careers, eulogies, Greg's prized cashews and more.
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Bunks beds are threatening Alison's sanity and Greg is living for JoJo's imminent return. People are losing their minds over a mother feeding her baby rare steak and a teacher was fired for reading a book about butts. Will Alison make it to Greg's St. Patrick's Day Show? Place your bets now.
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Owen's first experience with Chinese food is exhilarating. Greg travels around the country visiting his kids and a mom bribes her son to stay off social media. Meanwhile Alison keeps her cool while losing a chunk of hair to a children's toy.
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Elliot is a year older, Greg is confused about Valentine's Day and there will be no talk about the Olympics. Plus, why you shouldn't say "be careful" to your kids and a surprising developmental upside to the lockdown.
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Greg and Alison decide to prepare themselves for the apocalypse. Also they discuss their love of showtunes.
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Empty nest at Greg's house and an empty toilet at Alison's. Plus a baby boom in the Nordic countries, strife between Kim and Kanye, your calls and more.
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Let's see if Greg beat Alison again at last year's predictions. Plus twins born in different years, Greg's empty nest, a voicemail about childhood song parodies and Alison's infirmary.
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Alison gets a tasty mouthful and Greg heads to Florida on his race to catch Covid. Greg and Alison prepare their predictions, discuss baby talk and debate whether Alison will take mushrooms.
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While Greg is busy night golfing, Owen puts cheek to diaper. That's right: The Childishverse is buzzing with news of Owen's bi-daily movements! Also, noisy toys, ding dong ditch, a truly low low, Ariel from Little Mermaid and more.
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Alison prepares stuffing to go down to OC and Greg pumps up the soccer ball for the big neighborhood tournament. Plus first responder Barbie, how to get your kid to open up to you, a dead body and a quiz of sorts about new math.
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Greg's wife breaks her wrist, Alison launches a new podcast and we discuss the worst smells of our lives. Plus news stories about the social impact of childhood allergies and whether violent video games lead to real life violence.
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Alison causes Greg to have an existential crisis by asking if he deserves to be in the presence of Chris Martin. She takes no responsibility though because 73% of her brain is busy being anxious in advance of a routine surgery. Greg meanwhile may have golfed with the wrong handsome TV star. Plus breaking vaccine news, things you wish your kids didn't find and a voicemail about children's programming.
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Greg's eldest has turned 21 and Alison's youngest is still holding his poop. Plus Greg's Judd Apatow-organized benefit, Alison's social media bacchanal, flu vaccines for pregnant women, sobering child abuse stats, a binaural beats update and calls about restaurant recs, sunflower seeds and girthy finds.
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Greg's on the East Coast tending to his mom while Alison is being woken up in the middle of the night by Owen's boogie bubble. And some news stories about parental consent for vaccines, a twin surrogate, a dangerous product recall and more. Plus an amazing voicemail which asks a question for the ages: Is it a persimmon? Is it a foot? And Greg's gambling win!
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After a funny story about his friend Norm MacDonald, Greg and Alison talk about their week. Greg's trying out a new depression cure and Alison is attending preschool. Greg handily out-lows Alison once again while Alison finds herself breaking up an actual fight between her boys. Plus vaccine approval for kids coming sooner than you might think, surprising news about screen time, calls about life insurance and the sex talk and more!
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Greg and Alison respond to a listener's complaint that all they talk about is urine, urinals and poop by talking about dildos, poop and losing their virginity. Also Reese Witherspoon's parenting struggles, a news story that says moms who don't get enough sleep age faster, Greg's mountain biking adventure, Owen's blowout, lunchbox talk and more.
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Alison tweaked her neck and is on drugs so Greg has offered to carry her for this show, just like the footprints in the sand story. Greg performed in front of a masked crowd and was rattled by the lack of audience feedback. Everyone is tapping everything into the universe and Greg is asking how long we all want to live. We also talk about the best board games for kids, how to increase confidence, fresh clean dogs and butt stuff.
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Greg visits Texas and goes on the Joe Rogan podcast and Alison has a Covid scare. A study says maybe it isn't so bad for kids to be obsessed with princess culture. Just because Mila and Ashton aren't bathing their children that doesn't mean you shouldn't. Greg claims he doesn't smell and he thinks Alison might Canadian? Plus, when should you have the birds and the bees discussion?
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The Fitzdogs got family tattoos and now Greg and Erin are going on a camping trip and leaving their adultish children home alone for the first time. What's the worst that could happen? Meanwhile Elliot took his own piggy bank money to Target and used some of it to buy a gift for O-2! A study conclusively shows spanking is detrimental and Chicago Public Schools are making condoms available to students as young as fifth grade. A caller's daughter told a bald-faced-or-is-it-bold-faced lie and another caller needs to feel it.
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Seventeen minutes of strength training has nearly killed Alison but still, she wants to fight Greg's former producer. Greg met a celebrity who had a huge influence on his comedy and then did beer bongs with his niece and her friends (he did not partake). Plus pediatric cavities, high school biology, the fourth of July, twin sister surrogacy and more.
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Greg gets breakfast in bed and Alison is embarrassed by an off color remark. Alison guesses the top names of babies in 2020. Spoiler alert: Donald and Melania are no longer number one. Greg also gushes about playing golf with legendary Joe Pesci and Alison laments losing her voice during a VO session.
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Greg ate an entire lobster dinner in the back of a Lyft and still maintains a perfect score and yet Alison has been nothing but delightful and has a 4.9? What is the meaning of this? We explore this injustice before delving into stories involving children stealing their parents' cars and how to talk to teenagers. Plus JoJo's prom, Alison's voice, whether Greg is "funny," codependency and more. And your voicemails and emails.
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O1 is back home and Greg's shaving his balls outside. Alison went to Disneyland and we compare notes about our respective Mother's Days. Ever look at something online and instead of envy you experience the opposite? Relief that you aren't doing what's being pictured? Alison experiences intense GIMO (Glad I'm Missing Out) when she sees people post tour dates. Greg agrees the logistics of travel suck ass, which is why he only flies via private, first class, or coach. Plus your lullabies and a 13 year old who's allowed to watch Law and Order: SVU.
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A big fan of the show writes in and calls Alison a honking seal and a snake that's eating its own tail. How can it be both? Plus a baby is born on a Hawaiian flight by a mother who didn't know she was pregnant.
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A new study shows that "masculine" fathers are more effective in parenting their young children. And drumroll please... after a WEEK, Owen2 finally drops a deuce.
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Greg's low once again annihilates Alison's. She waltzed right into it! Plus Facebook mama drama, a baby monitor that picks up Scottish porn, Greg crashing his sister's car and whether birth order affects personality.
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Some of our past guests leave us celebratory messages and we reminisce about what a long strange trip it's been. Plus Greg's tips for airplane sleep, Alison's roller coaster of a playdate, a progressive New Zealand policy and more.
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Greg shares some exciting news and also mispronounces Dua Lipa's name in a way that makes Alison think of vaginas. We talk about the length of time pot stays in breastmilk, the horrors of spanking, and Mandy Moore comparing childbirth to an acid trip. Plus we celebrate women sharing the real truth about motherhood while Alison tries to stay relaxed about a potty training regression.
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A Seattle dad feeds his daughter with a beer bong and a younger wife wonders how to tell her older husband to spruce up his appearance. Plus #FreeDrSeuss, picking, Owen falling off the bed and more.
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A lot is being revealed this week. The inventor of the gender reveal party revealed she regrets this abomination. Fauci revealed he thinks schools can reopen safely. And we reveal the results of our question about whether you find our voices annoying. The answers might shock you. Plus Alison's get rich quick scheme, Greg's voice class, both Owens and more.
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A listener criticizes Alison's voice, calling it "singsongy" to which she trills a response. We talk about twins having babies on the same day, a lack of true highs and lows, working from home with little kids, people favoring hopeful sounding baby names, best and worst states to raise a family and more. Plus your calls.
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This week we tackle sibling rivalry and marital conflict! Anyone want to buy 400 dollars worth of unused ship shelving? Plus an ethical quandary involving cheating, toilet paper, inaugural programming for kids, Led Zeppelin, must watch documentaries, costly parties and more!
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We revisit last year's predictions to see who got it right and make some new predictions. Plus Greg's mother's time in a women's prison, Elliot's breakthrough, Alison's bidet, toddler lies, Greg's father's finances, the difference between lockstep and goosestep and so much more.
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We take a very brief look back before diving into Greg's special Christmas tree moment with his family, Elliot's huge leap forward, virtual Santa visits, a sad Covid diagnosis, an awkward family watchathon and more. Plus your emails and social media responses! Thank you for listening and watching in 2020! See you next year!
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It's our second anniversary (observed) and we couldn't have done it without you, our wonderful listeners! Greg's mom is in town and she's cleaning up on the golf course and at the poker table. Elliot remembers his first dream while Alison experiences a dark night of the soul. Plus men's restrooms, foster-to-adopt, scavenger hunts, Thanksgiving, your emails and the return of Shout Out.
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Elliot promises to make a Christmas loaf for the holidays while Greg and his daughter discover the Eric Andre Show. Moms in Utah are allegedly refusing to test their symptomatic kids for Covid and Alison gets sucked into cult programming. Did you know Greg had a ferret? Will Childish return to weekly programming? The debate rages on.
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This episode was recorded on Election Day and Greg and Alison haven't felt this nervous since they auditioned for Childish. Alison's been fighting insomnia with something Greg has dubbed the Platonic 69. Elliot chucked a pool noodle at his cousin on Halloween. Greg filled his week with a host of outdoor activities but worries about what his daughter is missing out on. Plus news about all the young adults moving back home and your calls and emails.
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Greg emerges from his weeklong quarantine to discuss Alison's accidental profanity in front of her children. And Greg's 12-15 words of Spanish let him down when he needs them most. Plus problematic Disney movies, tipping practices, Jeff Toobin's Zoom incident, a lady limo driver, a cafe that doesn't do change, your emails, a Fitzdog home tour and more.
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Alison does something silly to make Elliot laugh and then he asks her to do it over and over. A listener wants to know how many chuggas come before choo choo. So many comedians are leaving LA, will the Fitzdogs follow suit? Plus grandmas, a couple who knowingly sent their Covid-positive kid to high school, mass fires and more.
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Can you be happily married but fantasize about divorce? Greg and Alison weigh in plus Greg evades Alison's personal questions, Alison argues with Daniel over Elliot's hair, a study says pregnant moms shouldn't touch marijuana and we tell you why the kitchen might be the best place for virtual school.
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Greg's celebrating an especially great meal this week and Alison's gone off the rails in search of the perfect hose storage solution. Plus news stories about the benefits of a family dog and whether young children transmit COVID. Are the English repressed? A caller takes issue with something Greg said and invites him to come to the UK when this pandemic nonsense is behind us. And another caller wants to know how young is too young to become a dad.
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One listener calls in to us know he approves of Greg's oral sex advice while another offers some bidet tips that leave us questioning the benefits of bidets. We also talk about news involving whether schools should reopen, a Boy Scouts activity pin recall, and a study saying moms are happier when kids go to bed early. Plus sibling rivalry, acne, a pledge to better ourselves and a kitchen table that got a workout.
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Greg and Alison recap Father's Day and discuss placement of tattoos and what it means. Alison's low has her wondering if she wants another child while Greg's has him feeling like a bad friend. Plus news stories about parental role-playing and a pandemic-related baby bust along with your emails including one about developmental milestones.
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We asked you to share with us the weirdest things of your parents you've stumbled across and wow, your answers did not disappoint! We also talk about whether to take your children to protests, Greg's new game show, Father's Day, good and bad Father's Day gifts, a news story that says anesthesia in childhood might lead to substance abuse later and so much more. We also take your calls and emails.
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Bob Saget joins the show to talk about parenting three adult daughters, discussing racism with children, barnyard porn, cooking, his new podcast Bob Saget's Here for You and more. We also talk about Owen (O-2)'s first steps and some tough decisions about preschools reopening.
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John Henson (Talk Soup, Wipeout) joins Greg and Alison to talk about the fight that nearly ruined Mother's Day, being on lockdown with a six and nine year old, matinee sex and more. We also talk about Elliot catching Alison cursing, Owen (O-1) being way too into fitness, and news stories about baby talk and the future of the childcare industry. Plus we take your emails and voicemails!
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So much family time! On the one hand, it should be valued and treasured. On the other, Alison is losing her mind. Perhaps you are too? Greg receives some incredible news and learns the meaning of the word "gaslight." And a listener wants to know if she should put her family planning on hold. All this and a baby name quiz!
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Greg and Alison aren't really in the mood. Is anyone these days? Will there really be a post-pandemic baby boom? Plus news about dwindling driver's license numbers, sharing stress with your kids and a letter from Angelina Jolie whom Greg has met in person under less than ideal circumstances.
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Alison has a couple bones to pick with a certain someone on this episode! Plus we tackle how the virus has strained marriages but also created very funny situations, discuss news about the effects of stress on sperm, take a quiz to see who's the worse parent and so much more.
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Lockdown is wearing on Greg and Alison but they're trying (with varying levels of success) to stay positive. Also Greg let his daughter shave his head and Alison still feels guilty over an awkward neighborhood exchange. Plus how to celebrate your child's birthday while sheltering in place.
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Greg and Alison connect from Venice and Burbank, respectively, to talk about sheltering in place and whether it's acceptable to listen in on your spouse's therapy session. Plus news about hospitals requiring women to labor alone, suggestions for creating a plan should you become ill, stock market talk, the silver lining and how to stay positive, voicemails, emails and more.
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This week we're talking about being outsmarted by your own kids, the plusses and minuses of team sports, banned baby names, the dangers in letting grandparents watch the kids, spanking and how far too many people still do this, working through anger and so much more. Also we found our oldest listener!
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After discussing the role of hormones on sexuality and how that affects relationships, Alison and Greg are joined by their second intentional guest Christina P of Your Mom's House and Where My Mom's At? They talk about Christina's past as a child performer, a scene study from Greg's theater days, Alison's discomfort with the discussion, cell phone germs, bidets, breeding recklessness, parenting siblings and so much more. We also break down how to discuss Coronavirus with your kids and how to avoid touching your face.
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Let go of your perfectionism! Imperfect Greg teaches you how. Plus news about introducing children and pets, reports that say active shooter drills are doing more harm than good, a search for our oldest listener and more.
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A mysterious pain is haunting Jimmy's left testicle! We endeavor to get to the bottom of it in this episode featuring our first intentional studio guest. He joins us to recap Valentine's day, discuss being the parent of an only child, talk airplane squabbles, birthstones, catchphrases, McDonald's meal options, financial indiscretions and more.
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If kids under three are free to an amusement park and your kid turned three the day before, would you pay? Greg's answer will surprise you. Plus tax talk that is NOT BORING and will save you money, a discussion of irony, some wedding weather woes, mindfulness around your kids, married sex and so much more.
It's parent-teacher conference time and we have tips. Also, if you run into someone with whom you were once involved do you need to tell your spouse? What are the rules around hanging onto old love letters? Alison puzzles over the logistics of a steamy story involving fruit, Greg gets stood up at a pier, Alison takes a Tap-robics class, Greg gets nostalgic over his daughter's first job and so much more. Plus your calls!
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Recorded live at the Gateway Theatre in San Francisco. Alison and Greg hit the stage during Sketchfest and are joined by superstar voice actor Rob Paulsen (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Animaniacs, Pinky and The Brain). They talk about birth order, home schooling, asthma, Rogaine, a car seat trick, some encouraging news out of Utah and so much more. Plus a special San Francisco-themed parenting game with the audience.
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Greg recently performed in the Bluegrass State and left a little something behind. Also he's gotten permission to visit a nude spa in Portland and he's planning on going all in. He and Alison discuss the awards they expect to receive for their bravery, the sanctimoniousness of awards shows, talking to your kids about the news, Evita (again), traveling, discipline and so much more. Plus news about "looping" teacher, Generation Alpha, and your emails.
A night of insomnia leads Alison to a startling epiphany which she needs to run by Greg and new producer Pete. Meanwhile Greg has a lot of say about the Gwyneth candle, the correct pronunciation of Genghis Khan and why you need to write down the cute things your kids say. Plus news stories about the rising cost of delivery and sexed up tortoises and a call from a listener who needs to know how much harder having two kids really is.
From crabs in Denmark to sharting in Venice, Greg and Alison tackle life's highs and lows. Plus a news story about predictors of your child's academic success, more info about chicken sex, classic rock, selfish teens, embarrassing word mispronunciations, the dangers of horseback riding, your emails and more.
We check in on our 2019 predictions and make some new ones for 2020! Greg almost gets into a fistfight while skiing and Alison gets the band back together. Plus Alison opens a piece of fan mail on air that may or may not mention a threesome.
Alison makes a woman cry (in a nice way). Plus an update on maggot season from an entomologist, a call about paving the way for a second child, your emails, a discussion about whether if you pay for extra leg room seats and then the plane is empty and everyone sits where they want that's a win or loss and more.
A recap of Alison’s trip to Hawaii and Greg’s Mudbowl soccer game, a plan for top ten guests in 2020, career envy, a bid to connect a couple chicken lovers and more calls about chickens!
How vicious do Greg and Alison get when they unleash their impressions of one another? Plus a call with Alison's dad and cameo by her mom, discussions of grocery shopping, medicine, news, emails, and highs and lows involving a lot of tears.
Which comedians do Greg and Alison feel sexual energy with? Will they ever have three ways with their partners? Plus Greg's enthusiastic plan to move to Leisure World, news about "likes," a caller who wants to know how to help her husband feel more connected to her pregnancy and more!
A particularly gross episode but at least we don’t talk about chicken sex! Alison learns someone's been upset with her for two years. Plus the story of Greg's third arrest, news about rating teachers, a caller's question about her husband's new disgusting habit, a string of misunderstandings and some maggot solidarity.
We continue down the rabbit hole of chicken sex and reveal shocking tales of Alison being an accomplice to cheating and Greg’s second arrest.
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Greg shares the story of his first arrest. Alison gets a head-butt from Elliot as she watches O2 crawl for the first time. Plus an update from the caller whose husband suddenly, emphatically, doesn't want kids and news about sleep!
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Greg and Alison compare notes about this year's Halloween and Alison shares a vivid dream. Plus news about a disastrous gender reveal and a call from a listener to set the record straight on chicken sex facts. Also, Alison has maggots in her shower!
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Our first themed podcast! Stories of Halloweens past and some recommendations for this year's holiday. Plus, a news story about a town that's putting a stop to trick-or-treaters over a certain age and a caller who needs help figuring out what do when his son wants to dress up as Elsa.
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Owen calls dad during the show and breaks the news: he wants to be a philosophy major… Meanwhile Alison and Greg discuss pacing in bed, ask some hard-hitting questions about chickens, and answer a caller's questions about PDA. Plus the return of Shout Out! Lastly, Alison shares some sad news about the loss of a friend’s child. You can participate in a GoFundMe to build a playground in her memory at: www.gofundme.com/f/sophie039s-gift Follow Childish: twitter.com/childishpod instagram.com/childishpod
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Not only do Greg and Alison discuss pubic grooming, to show their commitment to the show they've decided to have a baby together in 2020. Haven’t heard about Your Mom's House going this far! Greg shares with Alison a trick he learned to reframe regrets, they discuss a new character with an opiate-addicted mom being introduced on Sesame Street and help listeners with questions about nudity in the home, rude neighbors, and more.
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Is there a "civil war" in comedy as some recent media reports have claimed? Alison and Greg are not on the same page. Plus Japan Airlines is telling passengers where the babies are seated ahead of time via a baby icon on the seating chart. And Greg reads some jokes from his 2003 SNL writing submission while Alison destroys property.
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Elliot took a big step up to the toilet this week and he did it himself, kinda! Greg popped a rib out of his back sleeping on a houseboat in Seattle with the one percent. Plus vaping, Greg's back unit (not a pun), playing games with kids, and more.
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How do you create an environment that best allows your kids to fully become who they are without putting your own crap on them? (Not literally. That's a felony in 12 states.) Greg and Alison discuss. Plus a conversation with O1 that Greg's been dreading, a phone call from preschool that causes Alison to panic, talk about Pink, Alec Baldwin, O2's first tooth, a question about potential verbal abuse, and skinny dipping stories.
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Big developments are afoot in Childish-land. Greg's son leaves for college and his daughter gets her driver's license. Alison's son starts preschool and switches from a crib to a toddler bed. A caller wonders if she should break the news to a friend that her husband isn't faithful. Plus some important soup talk, a discussion about intimacy, and more.
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Greg and Alison are joined by their first official guest Andy Richter for a live show recorded at The Comedy Store on Sept 3rd. The gang delve into Andy's recent separation, traveling with easily-embarrassed teenagers, rescue dogs, smug drinks, and more. Plus a game that didn't quite go as planned.
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Alison has a crazy update regarding the story she recently told about a bad experience with her first (male) gynecologist. Greg teases Alison for a controversial statement which sends her into a shame spiral. Plus sleeping in separate beds, apps for child-rearing, empowering music, and more.
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Alison’s anxiety over Elliot’s potty training has eased (and hopefully so will Elliot’s bowel movements). Greg gets a virus when a friend emails him some porn.
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Alison is concerned that a cult has moved in next door. Greg spends some time hanging out with The Venice Dude and lamenting that Owen is leaving soon for college.
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If you like dogs you will love this episode. Alison gives a potty training update and Greg shares tales from his 20th anniversary road trip.
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A listener looks for feedback on her polyamorous relationship, and Greg and Alison discuss their past sexual conquests. A very sexy episode.
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Greg turns an innocent visit from Alison's contractor Ray into a full on confrontation. Greg responds to a fan who recently lost their shit at one of his shows.
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The California earthquakes rocked Greg and Alison but didn't prevent JoJo from throwing a raucous Sweet 16 party. Plus advice for dealing with passive-aggressive mothers-in-law and an explosive diary entry about the best party an awkward teenage Alison ever attended.
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Despite a rocky weekend trip, Alison’s mood has improved. Greg’s dog is on a hunger strike and Alison insists Greg intervene.
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Greg’s good mood is clashing with Alison’s gloomy one this week. Plus a historical quiz, a voicemail about manners, Elliot's first dentist visit, and Greg's continuing adjustment to his firstborn leaving the nest. And no episode ends without a good Explosive Diary.
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Owen (One) busts Greg perving out but Greg makes up for it by getting O2 to laugh for the 1st time. Alison reads an explosive diary entry about how one day in the future she will read this diary entry.
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Greg just spent 4 days alone with his wife with the kids away and lived his best life. Alison on the other hand had to deal with Daniel having listened to the last episode. She is reminded once again that difficult discussions are the key to a healthy relationship.
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Luckily Daniel doesn’t listen to the podcast because Alison has a lot to say this week. Owen (the original) graduates Tuesday and Greg will likely cry like a baby. Alison prepares to get high with Doug.
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Greg and Alison recount their very different prom nights, and Alison describes a touching encounter with Daniel. Greg's son has his prom.
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Are zoos cruel? Does Alison have enough money? Should Greg shave his head? (He is going to anyway.) Also, your responses to whether you can work from home with kids and if it's ok to sexually harass your partner. Plus, how we lost our virginity. Like bad poetry? You're in luck.
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Alison struggles with a nose zit and whether child leashes are immoral. Greg's explosive diary entry reveals a fascinating moment from his early adulthood.
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Ah, Mother's Day. Greg took Erin to Malibu, and Daniel took Alison to Benihana. Are thank you notes a relic of the past or a great way to show you care? A shout out to military families overseas and, of course, another edition of explosive diary.
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Do you say yes to the universe or no to things that seem fishy? Greg throws shade on a Chicago shock-jock, and Alison struggles transitioning between mom life and work life. Plus another installment of Explosive Diary!
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It’s here! Explosive Diary has arrived on Childish! Greg and Alison regale you with musings from their younger selves. Also, some sleep regressions, pot cookies, sex, and Alison’s purple bathrobe.
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Greg and Alison agree that farting in front of a partner is a sign of intimacy. They catch you up on what to watch on TV and let you off the hook if you stopped breastfeeding. Plus an update on possible guests for a Live show this spring.
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Alison and Greg discuss the week's big holidays: Easter, Passover, and Earth Day. Conspicuous in their absence was 4/20 and Hitler’s birthday because honestly they already get enough play.
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Greg is back from a big college trip with his son, so he and Alison have a ton to catch up on. Plus some frightening news about a recall that will affect tons of parents, frustrations with partners who do things last minute when you aren't a last-minute person, fake IDs, a call about consent, and more. It’s the newest Childish!
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Room-sharing, vaccines, tackling your kid's tough questions, and more on this week's episode! Plus the show biz conflict that's keeping Greg up at night. It's an all new Childish! Follow Childish: Twitter / Instagram
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Alison's having a rough week, but Greg offers some perspective in an episode that includes discussions of fainting at the sight of blood (especially your child's), homelessness, snooping, exercise, parental guilt, raising boys versus girls, charity, and more. Plus a particularly challenging gig for Greg. It's an in-depth episode of Childish! Follow Childish: Twitter / Instagram
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Greg talks about the ups and downs of being a landlord, the impact of Crashing’s cancellation on his life, and the motivational advice he has for best dealing with depression. Alison shares her thoughts on the benefits and risks of giving birth at hospitals vs birthing centers, as well as her experience with epidurals and body image after pregnancy. It’s an all new episode of Childish! Follow Childish: Twitter / Instagram
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It’s happened! Alison had her baby! She and Greg go over the details of the birth and talk about the impact of newborns on older siblings. Plus a discussion of whether it's ever ok to critique a friend's parenting. They also talk about the recent college admissions scandal, Greg recounts his St. Paddy's Day show, and Alison searches for someone, anyone, who remembers a particular commercial from her youth. It’s a very special episode of Childish!!! Follow Childish: Twitter / Instagram
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Swivel Glider ReclinerThis week, Alison and Greg discuss different types of depression and various treatments for it, including a series of self-help books. They consider the importance of interacting with their children and how kids can remind of them of the boundless energy they’ve lost since becoming parents. Alison explores her fears of potentially facing induced labor, and Greg recounts dating a woman with a sex addiction who rode her bike through the rain just to show up soaking wet at his door. Now the future of stand-up comedy is….. virtual reality? Also, there’s a back and forth about masturbation somewhere in there.
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Greg and Alison veer off into discussions about lactation sex and mucus plugs. That’s right, it gets kinda gross. Other topics include bad acting, award shows, thrift stores, and kids sharing your clothes. They both try their best to avoid throwing shade at other podcasts. Are they successful? It’s arguable. Follow Childish: Twitter / Instagram
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Sweet: Desserts from London's OttolenghiModern parents may not want to hear this, but helicopter parenting works. At least that’s an argument of an article that Greg and Alison read on this week’s episode of Childish! Also, a caller feels a little guilty about wanting to raise her kids in a town away from family (but it DOES have a great sex scene - inside joke, you’ll get it), and Alison’s high of the week is her rejoicing what could only be deemed a “pre-pregnancy bowel movement.” Though listening to her story might be Greg’s low.
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Alison hasn’t packed her delivery bag yet, but she’s chock full of baby and SO ready to wear those hospital mesh diapers they give you after childbirth. While waiting, she and Greg chat about an article that reveals that parents DO have a favorite kid (and the kids totally know), read a snippet of a thoughtful essay by Greg’s son Owen about the Cinderella Complex, and listen to a caller’s doubts about whether or not she should be reading parenting books if she feels she trusts her own instincts with her child. Also - Greg drops the bomb that he used to do gymnastics as a kid. Alison’s mind is BLOWN.
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IT HAPPENED AGAIN. Alison has another pregnancy orgasm - this time involving a United States founding father - so Greg tries to unpack all of THAT. Both Greg and Alison discuss YOUR answers about the perfect age to have kids (spoiler: there doesn’t seem to be a consensus - go figure), and send some advice to a concerned dad who calls in when his 5-year-old daughter’s friend starts wanting to play doctor. Plus! Elliot just turned 2, he and Greg are best friends now, and Alison laments pissing herself while recording an episode of Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend.
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Whether it’s living with your parents after college (and seducing someone selling magazines, if you’re Greg) or figuring out why marriages are much more likely to dissolve nowadays, Alison and Greg are talking all about the family unit on this week’s episode of Childish! Also - I guess there’s a measles outbreak (so that’s another fun thing to worry about) and a listener phones in to get advice after her husband changes his mind about being open to having kids.
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DANGER. Lots to fear in this world. Or at least that's what a preachy gynecologist told Alison when she was 16. But in this week’s episode of Childish, both she and Greg muse on how to not be TOO protective of your kids, discussing some of the current dangers of raising kids (like the US Surgeon General warning of the risks of youth e-cigarette use and giving your kids too much added sugar). Plus! Greg helps his son plan a graduation trip to Europe, Alison tells her husband, Daniel to get a manicure, and they give advice to a dad whose teenage son is having a tough time with anxiety.
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Ready to hear a seamless segue from talking about the morality of spanking kids to the fun of getting spanked by your husband? In this episode of Childish, Alison and Greg discuss their sexual proclivities, try to figure out if Alison can tip someone to get a better delivery room, and give advice to a woman whose young son has a cleft palate. Plus - they share your constipation horror stories and it gets pretty gross.
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Did you know that nearly rotten fruit helps solve your bowel problems? Greg gives Alison tips on how to cure her pregnancy constipation, asks her if she’s participated in a tried and true sexual position since she’s been married, and a caller gets advice on how to cope with fertility troubles. All this and Greg gives us another update on the status of his daughter’s silent treatment.
Greg’s going to say yes to everything this year. Maybe not glory holes. At least that’s one of the Childish new year’s resolutions! You’ll hear more 2019 musings, updates on Greg’s TMS therapy and his daughter’s silent treatment, as well as the kitchen that Elliot got for Christmas. Also - Alison celebrates the findings in a BBC article about kids and screen time, but she also has some pregnancy bladder woes.
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Did Elliot barf from his dinner at Tam O’Shanter or Alison and Daniel’s caroling? Greg and Alison talk on a variety of health stresses (kidney stones, anyone?), make their life and baby-related predictions for 2019, and help a mom manage her kids’ screen time. Plus, Greg gets a party hot tub and you’ll find out what’s giving Alison the pregnancy phenomenon known as Lightning Crotch!
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How much mom nudity is too much mom nudity around a 2-year-old? Greg and Alison tackle the conundrum of a body-curious kid, discuss feeling guilty when your child’s spending a lot of time with a babysitter, and Alison talks about how Jon Hamm may have named her second child. Plus, news stories about couples having less sex, the benefits of being an older parent, and why you (maybe) should rid your home of fire retardants.
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Should you go ahead and have a baby? Is it wrong to fly a child to Hawaii? How do I handle my first hemorrhoid? These and other quandaries are explored on this week’s Childish. Plus, the nitty-gritty of postpartum depression, nurturing your child's creativity, and a traveling-with-toddlers hack that just may change your life.
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Public or private school? Greg and Alison get to the bottom of this age-old debate, as well as whether or not hell exists (spoiler: it’s the middle school years), and help a caller figure out if being a good parent actually matters. You know...long term.
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This week, Greg and Alison try to guess what their kids will say about them one day in therapy, discuss the drama that comes with sharing a nanny with another family, and encourage a caller to advocate for their 1st grader when a new teacher in town starts punishing him without explanation.
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In the very first episode of Childish, Greg and Alison talk about getting caught “dad-splaining,” the gift of pregnancy orgasms, and give advice to a caller about how to make it through the insanity-inducing nights of sleep deprivation with an infant.
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Washpod: https://amzn.to/2PWLr2l Shnuggle: https://amzn.to/2qGzGPk Wipe Warmer: https://amzn.to/2QEmi9zAfter you drop the kids off or put them to bed, turn on “Childish”. Hosted by real life friends, parents and veteran podcasters Greg Fitzsimmons (Fitzdog Radio) and Alison Rosen (Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend), Childish will help you laugh about the struggles and joys of parenthood, grow closer to your children, learn something useful and maybe even put the spark back into your love life. This is safe for work. As long as you work in a meat packing plant.
New episodes begin November 14th!
After you drop the kids off or put them to bed, turn on “Childish”. Hosted by real life friends, parents and veteran podcasters Greg Fitzsimmons (Fitzdog Radio) and Alison Rosen (Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend), Childish will help you laugh about the struggles and joys of parenthood, grow closer to your children, learn something useful and maybe even put the spark back into your love life. This is safe for work. As long as you work in a meat packing plant.
After you drop the kids off or put them to bed, turn on “Childish”. Hosted by real life friends, parents and veteran podcasters Greg Fitzsimmons (Fitzdog Radio) and Alison Rosen (Alison Rosen Is Your New Best Friend), Childish will help you laugh about the struggles and joys of parenthood, grow closer to your children, learn something useful and maybe even put the spark back into your love life.
En liten tjänst av I'm With Friends. Finns även på engelska.