10% Happier with Dan Harris

October 10th is World Mental Health Day - and to mark the event, Yale professor Dr Laurie Santos of The Happiness Lab podcast has assembled a crew of fellow hosts from the top wellness shows, a group we’re calling The Titans of Happiness.   

Dr Joy Harden Bradford is a clinical psychologist and host of the podcast Therapy for Black Girls.

Gretchen Rubin is the OG of wellbeing experts. She’s written many best-selling happiness books - most recently Life in Five Senses and hosts Happier with Gretchen Rubin. 

Dan Harris was a TV news anchor who - after having a panic attack live on air - promoted mindfulness meditation practices on his hit show 10% Happier. 

And since she wanted this to be an extra special episode, Dr Laurie invited one extra, extra special guest, Sesame Street’s Elmo. Elmo’s only three and half, so Samantha Maltin (Chief Branding and Marketing Officer at Sesame Workshop) came along with him.  

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This stuff can be done by anyone, anywhere, anytime.

Kaira Jewel Lingo, a frequent flier on this show, was an ordained Buddhist nun for 15 years. Now she lives in New York, writes books, and teaches meditation all over the world. Valerie Brown is a former lawyer and lobbyist who traded in her high-pressure job to teach the dharma. She also works as an executive coach. And Marisela Gomez is a physician, public health scholar and longtime meditator. 

All three guests come out of Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh’s Plum village tradition. They also are the co-authors of the new book Healing Our Way Home: Black Buddhist Teachings on Ancestors, Joy, and Liberation. 

Related Episodes:

• 3 Buddhist Strategies for When the News is Overwhelming | Kaira Jewel Lingo
• How to Keep Your Relationships On the Rails | Kaira Jewel Lingo
• The Medieval Executioner in Your Head | Valerie Brown

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Up until now, in our culture, we’ve generally talked about physical health and mental health–but there’s an emerging consensus that the missing piece is social health.

But what can you actually do to improve your social health? Today we’re going deep with the scientist who has thought a lot about this, and has a ton of good advice.

Kasley Killam, MPH, is a leading expert in social health and the award-winning author of The Art and Science of Connection: Why Social Health is the Missing Key to Living Longer, Healthier, and Happier. As a graduate of the Harvard School of Public Health, sought-after advisor and keynote speaker, and founder of Social Health Labs, Killam has been improving global well-being through connection for over a decade. Her collaborations with organizations like Google, the US Department of Health and Human Services, and the World Economic Forum contribute to building more socially healthy products, workplaces, and communities. Killam’s insights can be found in outlets such as The New York Times, Forbes, NPR, Scientific American, Psychology Today, and The Washington Post.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why social health is so important, and how it impacts our physical and mental health
• How to figure out what your social style is
• Tips for strengthening your social muscles
• What you can do to boost your social health muscles
• How much vulnerability is appropriate 
• How to have a healthy relationship with yourself
• How legislation could help with social health
• Emerging industries for social fitness
• And lastly, how we can work towards creating a society that cultivates connection

Related Episodes:

Self-Compassion Ain’t Always Soft | Kristin Neff

Kryptonite for the Inner Critic | Kristin Neff

Rethinking Success | Mia Birdsong

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Without a good compass, it is hard to have a sense of direction. Our inner world is much the same—and you can fine-tune your aim in life by sensing where you are right now.  

About Emily Horn:

Emily Horn is on the core team of Buddhist Geeks, which integrates technology, culture, and meditation. She is authorized to teach meditation by Spirit Rock Meditation Center, Insight Meditation Society, and InsightLA, and has been called a “power player of the mindfulness movement" by Wired Magazine.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Tuning Your Inner Compass.”

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A deep dive on one of the thorniest and most destructive states of mind.

For this episode, Executive Producer DJ Cashmere interviewed a trio of brilliant Dharma teachers to get their advice about how to handle anger. This is the first in a series of 'correspondent' episodes, in which DJ identifies a pain point in his life and meditation practice, then goes out into the world to report on the best ways to address it.

Kaira Jewel Lingo is a former nun in the Plum Village tradition started by Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh. Vinny Ferraro teaches at the Insight Meditation Society and Spirit Rock, and also in prisons. Matthew Brensilver teaches at many of the same retreat centers, and spent many years working in the field of addiction pharmacotherapy.

****

Want to study and practice with today's guests? Please check out these Spirit Rock offerings:

Matthew Brensilver, Buddhist Psychology Training (Begins in January)

Vinny Ferraro: A Year to Live; Discovering What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully (Begins in January)

Kaira Jewel Lingo: Healing Our Way Home (Oct. 20); Insight Meditation Retreat (April 9-16; opens Dec. 11)

All 10% Happier listeners receive a discount code for our December Insight Retreat (Dec. 8-18) with the code TENPERCENT

& if you'd like to study with these guests on the East Coast, check out these retreats at the Insight Meditation Society:

Kaira Jewel Lingo, Strength to Love: Honoring Dr. Martin Luther King: Jr. (Jan 17 - Jan 20), and Return to Wholeness: Opening to Wisdom & Love (Mar 23 - Mar 29)

Vinny Ferraro, Peace in Presence: A Four-Night Retreat for All (Jan 31 - Feb 4)

Related Episodes:

• 3 Buddhist Strategies for When the News is Overwhelming | Kaira Jewel Lingo
• How to Keep Your Relationships On the Rails | Kaira Jewel Lingo
• Three Buddhist Practices For Getting Your Sh*t Together | Vinny Ferraro
• Why Self-Hatred Makes No Sense | Matthew Brensilver
• How to Actually Be Present | Matthew Brensilver
• The Voice in Your Head | Ethan Kross
• I Just Went Through A Career Earthquake: This Is What's Next.
• How to Repair the Damage After a Fight | Dr. Becky Kennedy
• Get Happier Without Losing Your Edge | Kamala Masters
• Best of the Archives: Making it RAIN | Tara Brach
• Kryptonite for the Inner Critic | Kristin Neff

Also, the teachers’ sites:

https://vinnyferraro.org/

Vinny Ferraro's Course, A Year To Live

https://www.kairajewel.com/

https://www.matthewbrensilver.org/

Feedback form: Let us know what you think!

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Dr. Sanjay Gupta is the multiple Emmy Award-winning chief medical correspondent for CNN and host of the CNN podcast Chasing Life. Gupta, a practicing neurosurgeon, plays an integral role in CNN’s reporting on health and medical news for all of CNN’s shows domestically and internationally. In addition to his work for CNN, Gupta is an associate professor of neurosurgery at Emory University Hospital and associate chief of neurosurgery at Grady Memorial Hospital in Atlanta. He is the author of four New York Times best-selling books, “Chasing Life” (2007), “Cheating Death” (2009), “Monday Mornings” (2012), and “Keep Sharp: Building a Better Brain” (2020).

In this episode we talk about:

• Sanjay’s origin story and how he got interested in the brain in the first place
• The mysteries of consciousness
• We dive into his five pillars of brain health
• How you can grow new brain cells by moving the body (but in certain ways)
• Key skills for challenging your brain
• We hear about some meditation tips Sanjay picked up from the Dalai Lama
• Whether we should worry alone or with other people
• And lastly, why it’s so important for men to have vulnerable conversations with each other

Related Episodes:

The Dalai Lama’s Guide to Happiness

#230: The Power of Rest | Alex Soojung-Kim Pang

#614. Your Brain on Food | Dr. Uma Naidoo

The Science Of Memory: How To Get Better At Remembering And Be Okay With Forgetting | Charan Ranganath

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This practice is an opportunity to take a break from *thinking* about frustration and feel a little bit of balance, ease, and patience.

About JoAnna Hardy:

JoAnna Hardy can talk about meditation to pretty much anybody. She not only teaches in traditional environments like retreat centers, but also in both schools and jails. JoAnna has been studying meditation for nearly two decades and she's done some amazing work ensuring that the practice is available to people who might not otherwise have access to it. JoAnna teaches at the Insight Meditation Society, at Spirit Rock, and is a Founding Member of The Meditation Coalition.

To find this meditation in the Happier app, you can search for “When You’re Frustrated.”

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Bringing you an episode of Good Inside with Dr. Becky Kennedy. 

Even if you don't consider yourself an anxious person, once you become a parent, it is easy to start worrying about the health and wellbeing of your child. But parents need to learn to manage their anxiety for themselves and their kids. To celebrate the 10th anniversary of his book, 10% Happier, Dan Harris joins Dr. Becky to dispel some of the myths about meditation and to show parents how meditation can be a practical strategy in their everyday lives.

Check out Dr. Becky's appearance on the 10% Happier Podcast here.

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A (potentially challenging) Buddhist recipe handling anxious times.

Tara Brach, a legendary meditation teacher, psychologist, and frequent flier on this show. She is the founder of the Insight Meditation Community of Washington and has been active in bringing meditation into schools, prisons and underserved populations. She has also written several books including Radical Acceptance, Radical Compassion and Trusting the Gold. 

In this episode we talk about:

• A Buddhist tradition known as the Bodhisattva teachings… which are quite radical… and which Tara thinks can vastly improve your life… and the health of democracy. 
• We also talk about: why some people might think this stuff is too soft
• 4 practices to develop compassion 
• A mindfulness technique known as RAIN
• How mindfulness can help you see what is beneath your anger
• Letting distress be a portal—and the amazing phrase, “action absorbs anxiety”
• How to get active when you have limited time
• And how to counteract the tendency to numb out

Tara also recorded a guided meditation based on this conversation, which you can find on www.DanHarris.com.

Related Episodes:

• The Dalai Lama’s Guide To Happiness
• Vitamin E: How To Cultivate Equanimity Amidst Political Chaos | Election Sanity Series | Roshi Joan Halifax
• A Counterintuitive Source of Hope | Sebene Selassie
• Best of the Archives: Making it RAIN | Tara Brach
• Can You Handle This? | Tara Brach
• How to Stop the War Against Yourself | Tara Brach

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The connection between your psychology and your health, and how to work with it.

Ellen J. Langer is the author of eleven books, including the international bestseller

Mindfulness, which has been translated into fifteen languages, and Counterclockwise:

Mindful Health and the Power of Possibility. Most recently, she is the author of The

Mindful Body: Thinking Our Way to Chronic Health.

Langer is the recipient of, among other numerous awards and honors, a Guggenheim

Fellowship, the Award for Distinguished Contributions to Psychology in the Public

Interest from the American Psychological Association, the Award for Distinguished

Contributions of Basic Science to the Application of Psychology from the American

Association of Applied and Preventive Psychology, and the Adult Development and

Aging Distinguished Research Achievement Award from the American Psychological

Association.

She is the author of more than 200 research articles and her trailblazing experiments in

social psychology have earned her inclusion in The New York Times Magazine’s “Year

in Ideas” issue. A member of the psychology department at Harvard University and a

painter, she lives in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

In this episode we talk about:

• The power of placebos
• Why she isn’t a fan of positive thinking as it is talked about in new age circles
• Her version of mindfulness, which is quite different from the version we usually talk about here on the show, which comes out of Buddhism
• Psychological treatments for chronic illness 
• Smart strategies for reframing aging. 
• Why the world would be boring if you knew it all
• What she means by her concept of a “mindful utopia”
• And her favorite one liners 

Related Episodes:

• The Science Of Manifestation: Can This Stanford Neuroscientist Convince A Skeptical Dan To Give It A Shot? | Dr. James R. Doty
• How to Get the Wisdom of Old Age Now | Dilip Jeste 
• Tripping Out with a Legend: Jon Kabat-Zinn on Pain vs. Suffering, Rethinking Your Anxiety, and the Buddha's Teaching in a Single Sentence

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Start focused on what's truly important. When you pause to remember the big picture, your day can move forward grounded in integrity & wisdom.

About Alexis Santos:

Alexis has practiced and taught Insight Meditation in both the East and West since 2001. He has been a long-time student of Sayadaw U Tejaniya (a well respected meditation teacher in Burma whose teachings have attracted a global audience), and his teaching emphasizes knowing the mind through a natural and relaxed continuity -- a style of practice that's particularly useful during our crazy lives. Alexis has completed the Spirit Rock/IMS Teacher Training, teaches retreats across the globe, and currently lives in Portland, Maine.

To find this meditation in the Happier app, you can search for “Wake Up With Perspective.”

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Natasha Rothwell created, executive produced, and stars in the highly anticipated series How To Die Alone.

Natasha is best known for her Emmy Nominated performance in HBO’s The White Lotus and is set to reprise her role as Belinda Lindsey in the third season of the series currently in production.

She is also known for her critically acclaimed work as a series regular, writer, director, and producer on HBO’s Insecure, for which she has won a Peabody Award and received the 2022 NAACP Image Award for Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy.

Having previously written for Saturday Night Live, and after penning screenplays for Netflix, Paramount, and HBO Max— Natasha’s original screenplay Black Comic-Con was selected for the 2021 Sundance Screenwriters Lab.

Her genre-bending feature, along with several other projects, are in development at her production company, Big Hattie Productions—founded in 2020 to focus on creating, producing, and developing projects that champion marginalized voices in subversive ways.

In this episode we talk about:

• Being alone vs being lonely
• How she handles her own tendencies toward people-pleasing and burnout
• Working with doubt, faith and the venerable cliche of “trusting in the universe”
• Envy (and how it’s a partner to the scarcity mindset)
• Therapy
• Meditation
• Why she loves RomComs — and her issues with them 
• And we go Behind the scenes in a TV writer’s room — and why it’s even tougher when the character is you 

Related Episodes:

Kryptonite for the Inner Critic | Kristin Neff

Self-Compassion Ain't Always Soft | Kristin Neff 

Non-Negotiables Playlist

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Meditation retreats are the object of much intrigue and even suspicion. So today, we’re going to take you inside a 10-day silent meditation retreat that Dan recently did with his teacher, Joseph Goldstein. You’ll also hear from Senior Producer, Marissa Schneiderman, who was fresh off a retreat of her own, with meditation teachers Alexis Santos and Andrea Fella. 

In this episode we talk about:

• The ups and downs of retreats
• Some famous Buddhist listicles, including the five hindrances
• The importance of repetition
• We’ll hear snippets of Joseph answering Dan’s questions
• We find out what “cowboy dharma” is
• What it feels like to wear shit colored glasses
• How to stop getting caught in a mind trap
• And lastly, we listen to voicemails and answer audience questions! 

Related Episodes:

Joseph Goldstein On: How Not To Try Too Hard in Meditation, Why You Shouldn't "Waste Your Suffering," and the Value Of Seeing How Ridiculous You Are

#377. A More Relaxed Way to Meditate | Alexis Santos

Everything You Wanted To Know About Meditation Retreats But Were Afraid To Ask | Spring Washam (And Dan’s Close Friend, Zev Borow)

#327 Uprooting Your Delusions | Andrea Fella 

How to Take Risks (an Experimental Episode) | Marissa Schneiderman

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It’s so easy, especially these days, to numb out. To get bored. To move through life on autopilot. There is even a scientific term for this: habituation.

Today we’re talking to a researcher who co-authored a new book about the neuroscience of habit and how to wake up again. To make things exciting. Or as she says, to “re-sparkle”. 

Tali Sharot is a professor of cognitive neuroscience at University College London and MIT. She’s written several books including The Optimism Bias and The Influential Mind. Her latest, co-written with Cass Sunstein, is called Look Again: The Power of Noticing What Was Always There. 

In this episode we talk about:

• What habituation is and what’s going on in the brain when it happens
• How it negatively impacts the joy we feel in life – and inversely – how it can make us stop noticing the bad stuff
• Key strategies for disrupting habituation and introducing change and variety into your life
• The interesting relationship between creativity and people who habituate slowly
• How habituation impacts our relationships
• Why it’s important to break up the good experiences, but swallow the bad whole.
• How to wake up from a “technologically induced coma”
• How people emotionally habituate to dishonesty and lying
• And lastly, we talk about the dangers of habituating to a slow, incremental rise in tyranny – and how dis-habituation entrepreneurs can help

Related Episodes:

#345 How to Change Your Habits | Katy Milkman

How Turning Habits Into Rituals Can Help You At Home, At Work, And When You’re Anxious | Michael Norton

Making and Breaking Habits, Sanely | Kelly McGonigal

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Recorded live at the Omega Institute, Dan leads us through a loving-kindness meditation, followed by discussion with retreat co-leaders Jeff Warren and Sebene Selassie.

For more information on the next upcoming Meditation Party retreat, including scholarships available for BIPOC participants, visit Omega Institute. 

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We also talk about: whether it is possible to be a failed meditator; grief versus mourning; and meditation tips for parents.

Sebene Selassie is a writer, teacher, and speaker who leads meditation, creativity, and nature-based practices for personal & collective liberation. Using ancient wisdom and modern science mixed with her own relational and relatable style, Sebene helps spiritually curious people explore the profound and sacred truth of belonging. She is trained as a meditation teacher, an integral coach, a practitioner of Indigenous Focusing Oriented Therapy for Complex Trauma (IFOT), and is a licensed hiking guide in New York State. She has taught classes, workshops and retreats online and in person for almost fifteen years. Sebene is a devoted student of mystic traditions, including astrology, and writes the popular newsletter Ancestors to Elements. Her first book, You Belong: A Call for Connection, is published by HarperOne. 

Jeff Warren is a meditation instructor and writer, known for his dynamic and accessible style of teaching. He is the co-author of The New York Times best-selling Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics, founder of the nonprofit Consciousness Explorers Club, and co-host of the Mind Bod Adventure Pod. Jeff's Do Nothing Project streams for free every Sunday night on YouTube; his guided meditations reach millions of people through the Ten Percent Happier and Calm apps, as well as through his Substack, Home Base. 

Jeff’s mission is to empower people to care for their mental health, through the realistic, intelligent and sometimes irreverent exploration of meditation and personal growth practices. As someone with both ADHD and bipolar, he is big on destigmatizing mental health issues, and championing a neurodiverse outlook on life and practice.

Tascha Schumann is a Buddhist Lama, writer, visual artist, co-host of The Mind Bod Adventure Pod, and Juno-nominated recording artist whose work has been streamed many millions of times around the world.

Related Episodes:

How to Stay Calm No Matter What’s Happening | Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren

Meditation Party: The “Sh*t Is Fertilizer” Edition | Sebene Selassie & Jeff Warren

Meditation Party with Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren: Psychedelics, ADHD, Waking Up From Distraction, and Singing Without Being Self-Conscious

Meditation Party: Magic, Mystery, Intuition, Tattoos, and Non-Efforting | Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren

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In which Dan gets candid about a major life struggle, the practical takeaways, and a big new project.

In this episode:

• Dan shares news about what’s next for him
• His strategies and lessons from a big career change including how to deal with conflict, anger and insomnia
• What he's learned about the power of self-compassion, the value of failure and how to gain perspective when you need it most 

If you'd like to be a member of Dan's new community but a subscription isn't affordable for you, write to [email protected], and we'll hook you up, no questions asked.

Related Episodes:

Your Sleep Questions, Answered | Donn Posner

How To Sleep Better | Diane Macedo

Kryptonite for the Inner Critic | Kristin Neff

Check out all the offerings at DanHarris.com

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Full Shownotes: https://happierapp.com/podcast/tph/dan-career-earthquake

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This Stanford psychologist has evidence that being a cynic is bad for your health, and offers a non-corny alternative. 

Dr. Jamil Zaki is a professor of psychology at Stanford University and the director of the Stanford Social Neuroscience Lab. He’s the author of The War for Kindness: Building Empathy in a Fractured World, and his new book is called Hope for Cynics: The Surprising Science of Human Goodness.

In this episode we talk about:

• What cynicism is, and why it’s so appealing
• His own history as a “recovering cynic,”
• How to know if you yourself are a cynic
• A step-by-step guide to start developing the “hopeful skeptic” mindset
• How to get better at disagreeing with other people, including some rules of engagement
• And how to encourage kids not to become cynical

Related Episodes:

How (and Why) to Hack Your Empathy | Jamil Zaki

Reversing the Golden Rule | Jamil Zaki

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Recorded live at the Omega Institute, Jeff guides us through two different approaches to being attentive to our experience — followed by a discussion with Dan and Sebene.

About Jeff Warren:

Jeff makes meditation and practice accessible to diverse audiences in order to help people live more fulfilled and connected lives. He’s taught meditation to suspicious journalists, US Army cadets, burned-out caregivers, Arizona cops, formerly-incarcerated youth, virtuoso popstars, distractible teens, and every other conceivable demographic of freethinker, including squirmy six-year old kids.  He tries to do this in a way that’s rigorous and clear and adventurous. You can find out more about him at jeffwarren.org. 

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We all know that change is inevitable and impermanence is non-negotiable. But somehow it can feel surprising, maybe even wrong, when we personally hit turbulence. The Buddha had a lot to say about this, and so does our guest. 

Kaira Jewel Lingo is a Dharma teacher who has a lifelong interest in blending spirituality and meditation with social justice. Having grown up in an ecumenical Christian community where families practiced a new kind of monasticism and worked with the poor, at the age of twenty-five she entered a Buddhist monastery in the Plum Village tradition and spent fifteen years living as a nun under the guidance of Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh. She received Lamp Transmission from Thich Nhat Hanh and became a Zen teacher in 2007, and is also a teacher in the Vipassana Insight lineage through Spirit Rock Meditation Center. Today she sees her work as a continuation of the Engaged Buddhism developed by Thich Nhat Hanh as well as the work of her parents, inspired by their stories and her dad’s work with Martin Luther King Jr. on desegregating the South. 

In addition to writing We Were Made for These Times: Skilfully Moving through Change, Loss and Disruption, she is also the editor of Thich Nhat Hanh’s Planting Seeds: Practicing Mindfulness with Children. Now based in New York, she teaches and leads retreats internationally, provides spiritual mentoring, and interweaves art, play, nature, racial and earth justice, and embodied mindfulness practice in her teaching. She especially feels called to share the Dharma with Black, Indigenous, and People of Color, as well as activists, educators, youth, artists, and families. Her newest book, co-written with Marisela B. Gomez and Valerie Brown, is  Healing Our Way Home: Black Buddhist Teachings on Ancestors, Joy, and Liberation.

In this episode we talk about:

• waking up to what’s happening right now
• trusting the unknown (easier said than done) 
• A Buddhist list called the five remembrances 
• how gratitude helps us in times of disruption
• And accepting what is (and why this is different from resignation or passivity)

Please note: There are brief mentions of domestic violence, abuse, the suffering of refugees, and war in this episode.

Related Episodes:

3 Buddhist Strategies for When the News is Overwhelming | Kaira Jewel Lingo

How to Keep Your Relationships On the Rails | Kaira Jewel Lingo

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Cognitive scientist Maya Shankar talks about how to get comfortable with uncertainty in an ever-changing world. 

It seems like a design flaw in our species that we live in a world of constant change yet most of us are not comfortable with uncertainty. 

In this episode, we talk to Maya Shankar about how to get better at dealing with change and to stop seeking what scientists call “cognitive closure.”

Shankar is a former Senior Advisor in the Obama White House, where she founded and served as Chair of the White House Behavioral Science Team. She also served as the first Behavioral Science Advisor to the United Nations, and is currently a Senior Director of Behavioral Economics at Google. She is the host of the Pushkin Industries podcast A Slight Change of Plans, which was named Best Show of the Year in 2021 by Apple. 

In this episode we talk about: 

• Why humans are so uncomfortable with uncertainty and change
• What a behavioral scientist actually does in the world
• Why even the host of a podcast about change isn’t immune to the uncertainties of life 
• The benefits of cultivating a more malleable sense of self
• Why humans are such bad forecasters
• The importance of auditing yourself when you’re undergoing a big change
• How to take advantage of big reset moments
• The concept of cognitive closure and why encouraging an open mind can make us more resilient  

Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/maya-shankar-466

Where to find Maya Shankar online: 

Website: mayashankar.com

Social Media:

• Twitter 
• Facebook
• Instagram

Books Mentioned:

• The Language Instinct: How the Mind Creates Language 
• Nudge: Improving Decisions about Health, Wealth, and Happiness
• Stumbling on Happiness

Additional Resources:

Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

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This is the first time you’ve ever been here, now. Pascal invites you to discover the vivid and mysterious experience of this new moment.

About Pascal Auclair:

Pascal Auclair has been immersed in Buddhist practice and study since 1997, sitting retreats in Asia and America with revered monastics and lay teachers. He has been mentored by Joseph Goldstein and Jack Kornfield at the Insight Meditation Society (IMS) in Massachusetts and Spirit Rock Meditation Center in California, where he is now enjoying teaching retreats. Pascal teaches in North America and in Europe. He is a co-founder of True North Insight and one of TNI’s Guiding Teachers.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Rediscover the Familiar.”

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Cultivating resilience in the face of whatever comes up.

Ethan Nichtern is the author of Confidence: Holding Your Seat through Life’s Eight Worldly Winds and several other titles, including the widely acclaimed The Road Home: A Contemporary Exploration of the Buddhist Path. A renowned contemporary Buddhist teacher and the host of The Road Home Podcast, Nichtern has offered meditation and Buddhist psychology classes at conferences, meditation centers, yoga studios, and universities, including Brown, Yale, and NYU. He has been featured by CNN, NPR, the New York Times, Vogue, and Business Insider and has written for the Huffington Post, Beliefnet, Lion’s Roar, Tricycle, Buddhadharma, and more. He lives in Brooklyn. Visit him online at http://www.EthanNichtern.com.

In this episode we talk about:

• Authentic vs performative confidence
• The line between humility and confidence
• A Buddhist list called the Eight Worldly Winds
• A slew of little practices you can do in order to boost your confidence (or resilience or equanimity)
• The meaning of self-confidence in a tradition that argues the self is an illusion

Related Episodes:

• A Buddhist Approach to Money Worries | Ethan Nichtern
• The Dharma of the Princess Bride | Ethan Nichtern
• How To Get Ahead At Work, Buddhist-Style | David Nichtern
• #574. Do You Feel Like an Imposter? | Dr. Valerie Young (Co-Interviewed by Dan's Wife, Bianca!)

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Smart and practical strategies for living, in Maria's words, wonder-smitten by reality.

Maria Popova thinks and writes about our search for meaning — sometimes through science and philosophy, sometimes through poetry and children's books, always through the lens of wonder. She is the creator of The Marginalian (born in 2006 under the name Brain Pickings), which is included in the Library of Congress permanent digital archive of culturally valuable materials, author of Figuring, and maker of the live show The Universe in Verse — a charitable celebration of the wonder of reality through stories of science winged with poetry, which is now also a book.

In this episode we talk about:

• Wonder as a tool for improving all of your relationships
• The tyranny of the word should
• How the hardest thing in life is not getting what you want, it's knowing what you want
• Why she doesn't believe in making meditation a tool, even though she's been practicing for 14 years
• The illusion of certainty
• The immense value of intellectual humility
• Strategies for outgrowing your old habits
• Her new book, The Universe in Verse, which is a combination of science and poetry

From The Marginalian: How to Love the World More: George Saunders on the Courage of Uncertainty

Related Episodes:

• Bill Hader on Anxiety, Imposter Syndrome, and Leaning Intro Discomfort
• The Science Of Getting Out Of Your Head | Annie Murphy Paul
• George Saunders on: “Holy Befuddlement” and How to Be Less of a “Turd”
• The Profound Upside of Self-Diminishment | George Saunders
• A Radical Approach to Productivity, Self-Compassion Series | Jocelyn K. Glei

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A busy city is an ideal place to cultivate loving-kindness and powerfully connect to those around you while you’re out & about.

About Jay Michaelson:

Jay Michaelson is a writer & journalist, rabbi & meditation teacher, keynote speaker, and scholar of religion. Jay is the author of ten books, most recently The Secret That Is Not A Secret: Ten Heretical Tales. His 2022 book, The Heresy of Jacob Frank: From Jewish Messianism to Esoteric Myth, won the National Jewish Book Award for scholarship. He holds a JD from Yale, a PhD in Jewish Thought from Hebrew University, and nondenominational rabbinic ordination.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Loving-Kindness in the City.”

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There’s a great podcast we want to introduce you to today, hosted by our friend Rachel Martin at NPR. It’s her new show, called Wild Card, which she describes as “part-interview, part-existential game show.” It’s a different way of approaching a celebrity interview, with a special deck of cards that helps shape the conversation. It’s a really fun show, and she talks to some really big names, including David Lynch, LeVar Burton, Issa Rae, and US Poet Laureate Ada Limon. 

Rachel was also a guest on this very podcast recently, and we had a great conversation and even played a little bit of the card game, so go back in your podcast feed and check that out. You can also listen to it here. 

The Wild Card episode we’re sharing with you today features Taylor Tomlinson, who has found the kind of success many comedians dream about, with multiple Netflix specials and a late-night hosting gig — After Midnight on CBS. She tells Rachel that part of the secret to her success is fear. They also swap stories about their Christian upbringings, the search for validation and getting things stuck up their noses.

So enjoy this episode, and check out Wild Card wherever you find your podcasts. 

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The radio stalwart addresses life’s biggest questions.

Rachel Martin is the co-creator and host of the podcast Wild Card, an interview game show about life's biggest questions. She invites notable guests to play a card game that lets them open up about the memories, insights, and beliefs that have shaped their lives.

Martin spent six years as a host of Morning Edition, and was the founding host of NPR's award-winning morning news podcast Up First. She previously hosted Weekend Edition Sunday. She served as National Security Correspondent for NPR, where she covered both defense and intelligence issues, and also worked as a NPR foreign correspondent. Martin also previously served as NPR's religion correspondent. 

In this episode we talk about:

• How to survive the news
• How to make a huge career pivot
• What it’s like to become an orphan as an adult
• Insomnia and meditation
• How to decide what matters in your life
• We play the game Wild Card!
• We talk about how good we are at being wrong
• And lastly, something light… mortality and the infinite universe.

Related Episodes:

3 Buddhist Strategies for When the News is Overwhelming | Kaira Jewel Lingo

How To Find Meaningful Work in a Rapidly Changing World | Bruce Feiler

Why We Panic: A Journalist Investigates Anxiety, Fear, and How To Deal With It | Matt Gutman

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Lessons learned from the psychiatric hospital

We’ve got a fascinating and very personal discussion today about the often very painful gap between the way you feel on the inside and the way the world perceives you. We also cover the urgency and difficulty of sitting with your own discomfort. 

Anna Marie Tendler is an artist and writer. She is also the author of a new memoir called ‘Men Have Called Her Crazy’. 

In this episode we talk about:

• The circumstances of her checking into a psychiatric hospital in 2021
• The difference between our interior emotions and our exterior selves
• The help she found through Dialectical Behavior Therapy – DBT
• We dive into a very specific theme of the book – and its title – the insidious ways in which men have impacted her life. 
• And lastly, how she found a way to sit with discomfort and pain, while showing up in the world authentically to herself.

Related Episodes:

#510. Me, a Love Story: How Being OK With Yourself Makes You Better at Everything | Sharon Salzberg

The Science Of Speaking Up For Yourself | Elaine Lin Hering (Co-interviewed by Dan's wife Bianca!)

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Dan dweebs out with a dad rock icon.

Jeff Tweedy is the lead singer and songwriter of the Grammy award winning rock band, Wilco. The band have put out 13 albums… and shortly after this interview was conducted, the band put out a new EP. Jeff has released two solo albums and has written three books, including his latest, which is called World Within A Song: Music That Changed My Life And Life That Changed My Music.

This interview is part of an occasional series we do called Boldface, where we talk to well known people who are willing to go there. We’ve already dropped two Boldface episodes this week: the rapper and author Common and the actress, activist and author Goldie Hawn.

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Full Shownotes: https://happierapp.com/podcast/tph/jeff-tweedy-813

Additional Resources:

• Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

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This multi-hyphenate opens up about his four pillars of health and success

Common is an Oscar, Golden Globe, Emmy, and Grammy Award–winning music artist. He is an actor and producer, and has appeared in numerous critically acclaimed films, as well as hit TV series. He is the author of One Day It’ll All Make Sense and Let Love Have the Last Word, which were both New York Times bestsellers. He was raised in Chicago and currently resides in Brooklyn.

In this episode we talk about:

• Common’s relationship with self esteem growing up, and where he eventually found his own self worth.
• What it’s like dealing with rejection as an artist
• His book ‘And Then We Rise’
• The four different wellness pillars in his book; food, the body, the mind, and the soul
• The positive impact that therapy has had on his life
• What his meditation practice looks like
• The evolution of vulnerability in hip hop
• The evolution of vulnerability in his life
• And his relationship with spirituality

Related Episodes:

Rewire How You Talk To Yourself | Ofosu Jones-Quartey

#597. Mike D On: The Value of Failure, the Addictive Power of Adrenaline, and How a Beastie Boy Got Into Lovingkindness

#311 Karamo: How To Actually Do Self-Love

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Don’t be fooled by the bubbly public persona.

Goldie Hawn is an Academy Award winning actress, producer, director, and best-selling author. She’s written two best-selling books, a memoir called A Lotus Grows in the Mud and then, more recently, 10 Mindful Minutes, which is for kids and parents. She is also the Founder of MindUP, a charity that equips children with mental fitness.

In this episode we talk about:

• How she got interested in meditation — a story that, like Dan’s, involves panic attacks
• The power of curiosity 
• What she means when she talks about God
• What it means to take a “brain break”
• Why jealousy has never really been part of her repertoire
• And how to make a romantic relationship last.

Related Episodes:

How To Live A Happier Life | The Dalai Lama & Dr. Richard Davidson

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Our inner critics are sticky and painful. Practice radical kindness and self-compassion to reprogram harmful self-talk habits.

About La Sarmiento:

La Sarmiento (they/them) is a mentor for the MIndfulness Meditation Teacher Certification Program (MMTCP) and a teacher with Banyan. They have taught meditation retreats for BIPOC, LGBTQIA+, Teens, and Young Adults, and everyone in-between around the United States since 2010 and are a 2012 graduate of the Spirit Rock Community Dharma Leader Training. 

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “When Your Inner Critic Is Unrelenting.”

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A personal program for working with election-induced anxiety.

We’re dropping a special/experimental pod today, because we know a lot of you are freaking out about the election — so Dan’s going to talk through some strategies he is personally using to keep it together during this turbulent time. 

Additional Resources: 

Podcast episode with Bill Doherty (Braver Angels)

Feedback form: let us know what you think!

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Cara Lai has worked as an artist, wilderness guide, social worker, and therapist before becoming a full time meditation teacher. She teaches teens and adults at Spirit Rock, Insight Meditation Society, and Ten Percent Happier.

To find out more about what Cara does, you can go to her website, www.caralai.org – where she’s got some online meditation classes, including one called Meditate Your Face Off. She also has a monthly class for parents, co-led by Ofosu Jones-Quartey and Jess Morey, both of whom have been heard on this podcast.

Speaking of podcasts, Cara also co-hosts a podcast called Adventures in Meditating (For Parents), along with Jess Morey and Jon Roberts.

Cara will also be a core teacher for a 14-week residential semester program for youth ages 18-32 this Fall in Marlboro VT. The program is called the Contemplative Semester, and there are many folks who will be teaching who have been in the TPH orbit, including Joseph Goldstein, Sharon Salzberg, Jessica Morey, Kaira Jewel Lingo, and more. You can find more info at www.contemplativesemester.org

Related Episodes:

The Upside of Desire | Cara Lai 

Can You Get Fit Without Self-Loathing? | Cara Lai 

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A Harvard professor on how to elevate everyday activities in order to lift your mood, improve your relationships and rise to new challenges.

Michael Norton is the Harold M. Brierley Professor of Business Administration at the Harvard Business School. He has studied human behavior as it relates to love and inequality, time and money, and happiness and grief. He is the author of The Ritual Effect: From Habit to Ritual, Harness the Surprising Power of Everyday Actions. 

In this episode we talk about: 

• The difference between habits and rituals
• How rituals impact various spheres of life, including creativity, grief and politics - and how not all rituals are beneficial 
• how to transform your everyday activities into rituals and how they can inject meaning into your life and give a boost to your relationships
• How to introduce rituals into your workplace without falling back on cliché (like trust falls)

Related Episodes:

What Science Says About Money and Happiness | Elizabeth Dunn — Ten Percent Happier 

How to Benefit From Religion, Even as a Nonbeliever | David DeSteno — Ten Percent Happier

How to Change Your Habits | Katy Milkman — Ten Percent Happier   

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When you’re spiraling with intense emotions, here’s a practice to help pick you up off the bathroom floor. 

About Sebene Selassie:

Growing up, Sebene felt like a big weirdo. Born in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia and raised in white neighborhoods in Washington, D.C., she was a tomboy Black girl who loved Monty Python and UB40. She never believed she belonged. Thirty years ago, she began studying Buddhism as an undergraduate at McGill University where she majored in Comparative Religious Studies. Now, Sebene is a teacher, author, and speaker who teaches that meditation can help us remember our inherent sense of belonging, that our individual freedom affects absolutely everyone and everything, and that our collective freedom depends on each and every one of us. Sebene is a three-time cancer survivor of Stage III and IV cancer.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Meltdown.”

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The two practices that helped turn this self described scowling, sarcastic skeptic into an expert meditator

Since 1999, Devin Berry has been a dedicated meditation practitioner, his practice is deeply rooted in the metta and vipassana teachings of the Insight Meditation tradition. He spent nearly five years in silent, intensive retreats, cultivating his practice and understanding. Devin is deeply committed to the personal and collective liberation of marginalized communities, believing that integrating reflection and insight leads to clarity and wisdom, which in turn fosters wise action.

Devin is a dharma teacher at Spirit Rock and the Insight Meditation Society (IMS), where he serves as a guiding teacher. He also shares his teachings through Sounds True and at various sanghas and centers across the country.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why mindfulness alone is not enough
• How metta is part of four related mental skills, called the brahma viharas—and how to practice those
• The story of how and why the Buddha invented the Metta practice.
• The role and practice of Dana – generosity.
• Devin’s year long Metta/Dana experiment 
• And lastly, how these practices can help us on and off the cushion

Related Episodes:

Sharon Salzberg Takes on the Cliches: Authenticity, Love, and Being Your Own BFF

Mike D On: The Value of Failure, the Addictive Power of Adrenaline, and How a Beastie Boy Got Into Lovingkindness

Everything You Wanted To Know About Meditation Retreats But Were Afraid To Ask | Spring Washam (And Dan’s Close Friend, Zev Borow)

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Our guest today is James R. Doty, a neurosurgeon who has just written a whole book about the science of manifestation – although, as you’ll hear him admit, there’s very little ‘magic’ involved in his process. 

James R. Doty, M.D. is a Stanford neurosurgeon, neuroscientist, compassion researcher, inventor, entrepreneur, author and philanthropist. He’s the founder and director of the Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education (CCARE) at Stanford University. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Doty’s six steps to manifest
• His very interesting backstory
• The art and science of intention setting and the role of our neural pathways.
• How caring can ignite our Parasympathetic nervous system, which in turn can help us manifest better
• Practical tips for embedding an intention into our subconscious.
• The keys to understanding what we want vs. what we need
• And how to ‘alert the bloodhound’ to harness the full power of your mind

Related Episodes:

• #388. The Science of Training Your Attention | Dr. Amishi Jha
• The Art and Science of Compassion: Thupten Jinpa
• #425. Compassion Is the Ultimate Tool for the Truly Ambitious | Paul Gilbert

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Watching things come and go helps weaken obsessive cravings both in meditation and in our lives.

About Joseph Goldstein:

Joseph is one of the most respected meditation teachers in the world -- a key architect of the rise of mindfulness in our modern society -- with a sense of humor to boot. In the 1970's, he co-founded the Insight Meditation Society (IMS) alongside Sharon Salzberg and Jack Kornfield. Since its founding, thousands of people from around the world have come to IMS to learn mindfulness from leaders in the field. Joseph has been a teacher there since its founding and continues as the resident guiding teacher.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Going Deeper: Seeing Change.”

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We're introducing you to the Ted Talks Daily podcast, with an episode featuring our own Dan Harris. Here's his TED Talk, "The Benefits Of Not Being A Jerk To Yourself."

After over two decades as an anchor for ABC News, an on-air panic attack sent Dan Harris's life in a new direction: he became a dedicated meditator and, to some, even a guru. But then an anonymous survey of his family, friends and colleagues turned up some brutal feedback -- he was still kind of a jerk. In a wise, funny talk, he shares his years-long quest to improve his relationships with everyone (starting with himself) and explains the science behind loving-kindness meditation, and how it can boost your resiliency, quiet your inner critic and simply make you more pleasant to be around.

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Loch Kelly is an author, psychotherapist, and nondual meditation teacher. Loch has Master’s Degrees from both Columbia University and Union Theological Seminary. He has his own app, called Mindful Glimpses. Loch is also a very popular teacher on the Waking Up app, run by friend of show, Sam Harris.

Free 30 days of the Waking Up meditation app: https://www.wakingup.com/tenpercent 

Free training and guided meditation pack from Loch Kelly: https://lochkelly.org/cycle-of-dissatisfaction 

Related Episodes:

Sam Harris on: Vipassana vs. Dzogchen, Looking for the Looker, and Psychic Powers

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A neuroscientist’s strategies to help you remember what really matters, and how mood, multitasking and other people can impact our memories

Charan Ranganath is a professor at the Center for Neuroscience and Department of Psychology and director of the Dynamic Memory Lab at the University of California at Davis.  He is the author of the New York Times bestselling book Why We Remember: Unlocking Memory’s Power to Hold on to What Matters. 

In this episode we talk about:

• The different kinds of memory that help us function day to day
• The impact mood has on memories - not just making them, but recalling them
• Why forgetting is not only useful but essential - even if it doesn’t always feel like it
• Practical tips to help us remember better, including distinctiveness, meaning & organization, planting cues, and chunking
• Why making errors is actually one of the best things you can do for learning and memory 

Related Episodes:

How To Prevent Dementia | Lisa Genova — Ten Percent Happier

How to Actually Be Present | Matthew Brensilver — Ten Percent Happier  

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Strengthen your ability to know the difference between fact and fiction by using sound to harness a foundational anxiety-taming skill.

About Leslie Booker:

Booker brings her heart and wisdom to the intersection of Dharma, Embodied Wisdom, and Liberation. Using this framework, she supports folks in creating a culture of belonging through her teaching and writing on changing the paradigm of self and community care. She shares her offering widely as a university lecturer, public speaker, and Buddhist philosophy and meditation teacher. She currently lives in Philadelphia with her partner and pup and is the Co-Guiding Teacher of New York Insight.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Return to Reality.”

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Reverend Benjamin Perry, is the author of Cry, Baby: Why Our Tears Matter. He’s the editorial director at Garrett Seminary, Consulting Minister for Public Theology at Middle Church, and editor of the Queer Faith photojournalism series. He has a masters in divinity from Union Theological Seminary. 

In this episode we talk about:

• Why Doty got interested in this subject, and the rather extraordinary exercise he put himself through
• The gender differences on this issue
• How vulnerability can be misused or weaponized
• The issue of interpersonal relationships when it comes to tears (Bianca and Dan delve into this in regards to their relationship)
• How we replay childhood patterns in grownup relationships
• The deep connection between crying and shame
• The messages we share with our children about crying
• How we can reconnect to the emotional parts of ourselves

Related Episodes:

• #361 Why Men Armor Up | Daniel Ellenberg
• #441. A Thing Most Men Won't Talk About
• Vulnerability: The Key to Courage | Brene Brown
• The Science Of Speaking Up For Yourself | Elaine Lin Hering (Co-interviewed by Dan's wife Bianca!)

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Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/benjamin-perry

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Learning how to thrive with enough.

Michael Easter is the New York Times bestselling author of Scarcity Brain and The Comfort Crisis. He travels the world to uncover practical ideas that help people live healthier, happier, and more remarkable lives. His ideas have been adopted by institutions ranging from the military to professional sports teams to Fortune 500 companies. He also shares his ideas on his popular newsletter, 2% with Michael Easter. 

In this episode we talk about:

• The evolutionary roots of overconsumption
• The challenges of having an ancient brains in a modern world
• The Scarcity mindset vs. the abundance mindset
• Understanding what Michael calls the “scarcity loop” – and how to apply it to daily life
• Tactical ways to work with habits and cravings 
• Understanding the scarcity loop, how it hooks us, and then how you can unhook using that same loop
• And How’s Michael’s life changed after researching this book
• Toward the end, we talk about Michael’s previous book, the comfort crisis—and some Practical steps for embracing discomfort

Related Episodes:

• The Anti-Diet | Evelyn Tribole
• Abby Wambach On: Grief, Addiction, And Moving From External To Internal Validation
• Glennon Doyle is Rethinking Her Relationship to Social Media, Hustle Culture, Intuition, Her Body, and Her Parents

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Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/michael-easter

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Learn to connect with the true home of strength, wisdom, and clarity inside of yourself, a place of safety that no one can take away.

About Kaira Jewel Lingo:

At the age of twenty-five, Kaira Jewel Lingo entered a Buddhist monastery in the Plum Village tradition and spent fifteen years living as a nun under the guidance of Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh. Now based in New York, she sees her work as a continuation of Engaged Buddhism as well as the work of her parents, inspired by their stories and her dad’s work with Martin Luther King Jr. on desegregating the South. The author of We Were Made for These Times: Ten Lessons on Moving through Change, Loss and Disruption, Kaira Jewel especially feels called to share mindfulness and meditation with Black, Indigenous, and People of Color, as well as activists, educators, youth, artists, and families.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Deeply Accepting Yourself.”

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On hitting Rock Bottom, de-armoring, and worthiness.

Jada Pinkett Smith is a multifaceted artist whose career spans over 30 years. Raised in Baltimore, she studied dance and theater at the Baltimore School for the Arts before moving to Los Angeles to pursue acting. Her breakthrough came in with the NBC series A Different World, followed by her first feature film, Menace II Society. From there, Pinkett Smith became a global star, appearing in numerous films like The Nutty Professor, Set It Off, The Matrix franchise and the comedic hit Girls Trip.

In addition to her acting work, Pinkett Smith has also executive produced projects such as Karate Kid, Free Angela and All Political Prisoners, The Queen Latifah Show, Red Table Talk, Red Table Talk: The Estefans, as well as Queen Cleopatra and Queen Njinga for Netflix. She expanded her skills further as the host of the Emmy award-winning talk show, Red Table Talk, where she engages in multigenerational discussions about social and cultural issues with her daughter, Willow Smith, and mother, Adrienne Banfield-Norris. She is now heading out on a worldwide book tour to promote her memoir, Worthy (a NYT Bestseller).

Related Episodes:

Non-Negotiables Playlist

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Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/jada

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The Queen of Drag discusses his new memoir, The House of Hidden Meanings, and makes Dan play an R-rated game.

RuPaul Charles became famous in 1993 with the song “Supermodel.” Since then, he’s put out 18 albums, he’s been in more than 50 films and TV shows, including his global hit, “RuPaul’s Drag Race.” He’s put out four books, including his latest, the number one New York Times best seller The House of Hidden Meanings. He’s won fourteen Primetime Emmy Awards, and he won a Tony in 2022 for producing the Broadway show A Strange Loop. 

In this episode we talk about:

• His daily spiritual practices
• Talking to his inner child
• The challenging family he grew up in
• His incredible business idea for a daytime disco for the over-40 set
• His definition of wealth, and why he says he’s always been rich, even when he had no money
• And he ropes Dan into a game of Dirty Charades – which gets a little spicy, so heads-up if you’re listening with kids around or have sensitive ears

Other resources mentioned: 

• RuPaul’s Allstora book shop and book club
• Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life by Dr. Susan Forward with Craig Buck

Related Episodes:

A Star, Utterly Unguarded | Brett Eldredge

How to Deal With Emotionally Immature People (Including Maybe Your Own Parents) | Lindsay C. Gibson

There’s No Part Of Your Life You Can’t Make More Awesome | Jeff Warren

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Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/rupaul-2024

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Plus her definition of the oft-dismissed yet game-changing notion of self-love.

We caught up with Abby Wambach at a really interesting time. She’s experiencing grief, for reasons we’ll let her explain. And for the first time in her life, she’s grieving while sober—which, in itself, is an interesting story, which she will also tell.

As you know, we only talk to famous people on this show if they’re willing to really go deep. And it’s why we call this recurring series Boldface. And Abby is bolder than most.

We also talk about: moving from external to internal validation, her definition of self-love (a concept in which Dan have a lot of interest, because it’s both cheesy and life-changing), the one question that changed her life, how every experience can turn into something positive, and on a related note, why getting arrested for drunk driving was one of the best things that ever happened to her.

Abby Wambach is a two-time Olympic gold medalist, FIFA World Cup Champion, and six-time winner of the U.S. Soccer Athlete of the Year award. She is the author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Wolfpack. And, together with her wife Glennon Doyle and sister Amanda Doyle, co-hosts the award-winning, critically acclaimed We Can Do Hard Things podcast. 

Related Episodes:

• Doing "The Work," Byron Katie
• Glennon Doyle is Rethinking Her Relationship to Social Media, Hustle Culture, Intuition, Her Body, and Her Parents

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When the world feels like a dumpster fire, it helps to remember that your contributions to improve things matter—even the small ones.

About Matthew Hepburn:

Matthew is a meditation and dharma teacher with more than a decade of teaching experience and a passion for getting real about what it means to live well. He emphasizes humor, technique, and authentic kindness as a means to free the mind up from unnecessary struggle and leave a healthier impact on the world. Beyond Ten Percent Happier, Matthew has taught in prisons, schools, corporate events and continues to teach across North America in Buddhist centers offering intensive silent retreats and dharma for urban daily life. 

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Celebrate Small Wins.”

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Emotionally immature people can wreck your life. One of our most popular guests returns to teach you how to make sure they don't.

Description: 

Our relationships are the most important variable in our health and happiness, but they may also be the most difficult. This is especially true when those closest to us turn out to be emotionally immature people.

Lindsay C. Gibson is a clinical psychologist and bestselling author who specializes in helping people identify and deal with emotionally immature people, or EIP’s. Her first appearance on our show was one of our most popular episodes of 2022. Now she’s back to offer concrete strategies for handling the EIP’s in your life, wherever you may find them. Her new book is called Disentangling from Emotionally Immature People.

In this episode we talk about:

• A primer on the cardinal characteristics of emotionally immature people (EIP’s), how to spot them, and why you might want to
• What Lindsay means by “disentangling” from EIP’s, and how to do it
• What often happens to your own sense of self when you’re in relationship (or even just in conversation) with an EIP 
• How to interact with an EIP 
• How to prevent brain scramble when you’re talking with someone who isn’t making any attempt to understand what you’re saying  
• How she reacts when she comes across EIP’s in her everyday life
• Whether it’s possible to have some immature characteristics without being an EIP
• Handling your own emotionally immature tendencies  
• Whether or not EIP’s can change
• The limits of estrangement
• Why she encourages “alternatives to forgiveness”

Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/lindsay-gibson-791

Book Mentioned:

• Disentangling from Emotionally Immature People

Other Resources Mentioned:

• Lindsay’s first appearance on the Ten Percent Happier Podcast

Additional Resources:

• Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

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Today’s guest, Dr. Lindsay C. Gibson, gives advice for dealing with emotionally immature people— whether they are your parents, boss, spouse or childhood friend, she offers practical tools to help navigate these difficult relationships. 

Description: 

Emotionally immature people (EIP’s) are hard to avoid and most of us, if not all of us, have to deal with them at some point in our lives. These interactions can range from mildly annoying to genuinely traumatic, especially if the emotionally immature people in question are our own parents, which is true for an awful lot of us.

Today’s guest, clinical psychologist Lindsay C. Gibson, gives advice for dealing with emotionally immature people, whether they’re your parents or not. She has written a sleeper hit book on the subject called, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents. 

In this episode we talk about:

• The signs of emotional immaturity
• Whether or not I’m emotionally immature
• What happens to children who are raised by emotionally immature parents, including their signature coping strategies
• Why adult children of EIP’s turn to healing fantasies, and how to let them go
• How to cope with emotionally immature parents as an adult
• What role compassion should and should not play in your relationship with EIP’s
• How to heal

Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/podcast-episode/lindsay-gibson-2022-rerun

Books Mentioned:

• Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents
• Who You Were Meant to Be: A Guide to Rediscovering Your Life's Purpose
• Recovering from Emotionally Immature Parents: Practical Tools to Establish Boundaries and Reclaim Your Emotional Autonomy
• Self-Care for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: Honor Your Emotions, Nurture Your Self, and Live with Confidence
• Disentangling from Emotionally Immature People: Avoid Emotional Traps, Stand Up for Your Self, and Transform Your Relationships as an Adult Child of Emotionally Immature Parents 

Other Resources Mentioned:

• Lisa Feldman Barrett

Additional Resources:

• Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

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To find some mental stability, start with physical stability.

About Oren Jay Sofer:

Oren Jay Sofer teaches mindfulness, meditation and Nonviolent Communication. He has practiced meditation since 1997, beginning his studies in Bodh Gaya, India and is a long-time student of Joseph Goldstein, Michele McDonald, and Ajahn Sucitto, and is a graduate of the IMS/Spirit Rock Teacher Training program. Oren teaches retreats across the country and works as Senior Program Developer at Mindful Schools, teaching and developing curricula for one of the international leaders of mindfulness in education.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Ground Hope In Your Body.”

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A self-described “silly man” tells us about what’s really important in life. 

Ted Danson has an acting career spanning over four decades. He rose to prominence in the 1980s with his iconic portrayal of Sam Malone in the long-running sitcom "Cheers," earning him critical acclaim and multiple awards. Danson's charisma and acting prowess have since led him to a myriad of diverse roles, including his Emmy-nominated performances in "Damages" and "Fargo." Most recently, he starred in the existential comedy “The Good Place.” Beyond his acting career, Danson is also celebrated for his environmental activism and philanthropy, demonstrating a commitment to making a positive impact beyond the screen. His next venture? A podcast with his old “Cheers” buddy, Woody Harrelson.

In this episode we talk about:

• meditation
• marriage
• hypochondria
• grief
• what he means when he calls himself a joy junkie
• what he learned from being on the TV show “The Good Place”
• and that time he did shrooms with his fellow cast members on “Cheers”

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Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/ted-danson

Additional Resources:

• Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

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Practical tips to stop judging yourself, chill out about exercise, and start taking better care of your body – from a Buddhist teacher who learned the hard way.

Description: 

It’s an urgent question for so many of us: Can we exercise, can we take care of our bodies, without being driven by shame, self-loathing, or noxious comparison to other people?

Our guest today has a unique perspective on this. Cara Lai is a former social worker and psychotherapist who is now a Buddhist teacher. She also used to be a marathoner. But in the last few years, her body has undergone some radical changes, leading her to some hard-won, fascinating, and deeply useful insights about how to strike the balance between taking care of your body and staying sane.

In this episode we talk about:

• Practices for that moment when you’re getting out of the shower, see yourself in the mirror, and engage in a festival of self-judgment
• The surprising things that happened when Cara was forced to stop exercising
• A counterintuitive mindfulness practice suggestion for those with exercise routines
• When and why you should purposely do things you know are bad for you
• Why we often resist ‘being in our bodies,’ why that’s OK, and how to lower the bar on this contemplative cliché–without giving it up
• A body-related Buddhist practice she finds to be totally not useful

Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/cara-lai-787

Other Resources Mentioned:

The Upside of Desire | Cara Lai

The Anti-Diet | Evelyn Tribole

Additional Resources:

• Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

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What if one of the often overlooked keys to being productive is being lazy? That’s the case you will hear made today by Brother Pháp Hữu, a very impressive young zen Buddhist monk.

Brother Pháp Hữu is a senior Dharma teacher in Thich Nhat Hanh’s International Plum Village Community and abbot of Upper Hamlet, the monks’ community in Plum Village Monastery, a practice center founded by Thich Nhat Hanh in southwest France. Born in Vietnam, he emigrated to Canada as a child. He began training with Thich Nhat Hanh at the age of thirteen when he first entered the monastery to become a monk. Thich Nhat Hanh gave him the name Chân Pháp Hữu, which means “True Dharma Friend.” For more than ten years, he accompanied Thich Nhat Hanh on his international teaching tours as his attendant and assistant. Today, Brother Pháp Hữu is deeply committed to building community and continuing Thich Nhat Hanh’s legacy, bringing his teachings in particular to businesspeople, families, and young adults. Brother Phap Huu is passionate about basketball, music, and developing new approaches to teamwork, leadership, mentoring and coaching, and is a beloved co-host—with journalist, leadership coach, and workshop facilitator Jo Confino--of the Plum Village podcast, The Way Out is In.

In this episode we talk about:

• The origin and purpose of something called Lazy Day
• What doing nothing looks like in practicality
• Why doing nothing is so hard for people
• How you can integrate the wisdom of lazy days into your life, even if you can’t carve out a whole day
• How laziness in and of itself can be productive and how it allows for a re-examination of our own happiness.
• And The geopolitical case for being vs. doing

Related Episodes:

• The Buddha’s 8-Part Manual for a Good Life | Brother Pháp Dung
• How to Suffer Well | Brother Pháp Dung
• This Episode Will Make You Stronger | Sister Dang Nghiem
• Six Buddhist Strategies for Getting Along Better with Everyone | Sister True Dedication
• 3 Buddhist Strategies for When the News is Overwhelming | Kaira Jewel Lingo
• A Buddhist Recipe for Handling Turmoil | Kaira Jewel Lingo

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Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/br-phap-huu

Additional Resources:

• Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

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While we may want to conquer physical pain, it’s actually observing the sensations and knowing when to take a break that’s the key to relief.

About Sharon Salzberg:

Sharon Salzberg is a meditation pioneer, world-renowned teacher, and New York Times bestselling author. She is among the first to bring mindfulness & lovingkindness meditation to mainstream American culture fifty years ago, inspiring generations of meditation teachers and wellness influencers.

A co-founder of The Insight Meditation Society in Barre, MA, Sharon is the author of thirteen books, including the New York Times bestseller, Real Happiness, now in its second edition, and her seminal work, Lovingkindess.

In 2023, Sharon released two new books: Real Life, available from Flatiron Books, and Finding Your Way, a small gift book from Workman.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “When Your Body Hurts.”

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On this show, we talk a lot about ways to stop the interpersonal and intrapersonal violence of obsessing about thinness. Today’s episode, though, is a bit of a departure… because this whole dynamic and debate has been deeply disrupted by the advent of Ozempic and other new weight loss drugs, which are technically called GLP1s. This is a controversial and touchy subject, to say the least. 

Journalist and best-selling author Johann Hari discusses his latest book Magic Pill: The Extraordinary Benefits and Disturbing Risks of the New Weight-Loss Drugs. He believes drugs like Ozempic are the equivalent of the invention of the iPhone – and will impact all of our lives, whether we like it or not, and whether we take them or not. And in Magic Pill, Hari – who somewhat ambivalently takes Ozempic himself – marinates in the complexity of all of this. 

This is Hari’s third time on the show. He has come on before to discuss his books on distraction and depression—entitled Stolen Focus and Lost Connections.

This is the latest episode of our Get Fit Sanely series. This is the third time we’ve done Get Fit Sanely, and in this go-round, we’ll be covering longevity, exercise, and the Buddhist case for laziness. 

Related Episodes:

Get Fit Sanely Playlist

Why You Can't Pay Attention - And How to Think About It | Johann Hari

Fighting Depression with Social Connection | Johann Hari

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Five takeaways from a year's reporting on fitness, and why this journalist says it's time to go easier on yourself.

Shannon Palus is a features editor at Slate covering heath, science, and human interest. In 2023, she edited Slate's year-long fitness column, Good Fit, about exercise. Her writing has also appeared in the New York Times' Wirecutter, Scientific American, and the Atlantic. 

In this episode we talk about:

• How this conversation changed the way Dan thinks about exercise
• Why you shouldn’t drive yourself crazy following the latest trends about health and fitness
• Why tracking your workouts isn’t always helpful - and remembering that there is always the option to “go slow.” 
• The importance of remembering that exercise is not one-size-fits-all 

Related Episodes:

Can You Get Fit Without Self-Loathing? | Cara Lai — Ten Percent Happier 

How to Stop Obsessing Over Your Body and Eat Sanely in a Toxic Culture | Virginia Sole-Smith — Ten Percent Happier 

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Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/shannon-palus

Additional Resources:

• Download the Ten Percent Happier app today: https://10percenthappier.app.link/install

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After an intense day, try this simple meditation to decompress and de-stress by getting comfy and putting your feet up.

About Jeff Warren:

Jeff is an incredibly gifted meditation teacher. He's trained in multiple traditions, including with renowned teacher Shinzen Young. Jeff is the co-author of NY Times Bestseller "Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics," and the founder of the Consciousness Explorers Club, a meditation adventure group in Toronto. He has a knack for surfacing the exact meditation that will help everyone he meets. "I have a meditation for that" is regularly heard from Jeff, so we've dubbed him the "Meditation MacGyver."

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “End of Day Decompress: The Porch Sit.”

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How to overcome inertia and research-backed plans that actually work.

Dr. Gary G. Bennett is Dean of the Trinity College of Arts & Sciences at Duke University. He is also a professor of psychology & neuroscience, global health, medicine, and nursing, and is the founding director of the Duke Digital Health Science Center. He has authored nearly 200 scientific papers and is a past president of the Society of Behavioral Medicine.

T. Morgan Dixon is the co-founder and CEO of Girl Trek, the largest health movement in America for Black women– with over one million members. 

Also check out Jeffrey Walker’s podcast, System Catalysts, where they did an episode on Morgan and Dr. Bennett.

This is the latest episode of our Get Fit Sanely series. This is the third time we’ve done Get Fit Sanely, and in this go-round, we’ll be covering not only longevity but also ozempic, exercise, and the Buddhist case for laziness. 

Related Episodes:

Get Fit Sanely Playlist

The Dharma of Harriett Tubman | Spring Washam 

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Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/dixon-bennett

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Insights from the places on the planet where people apparently live the longest and healthiest lives.

Dan Buettner is an explorer, National Geographic Fellow, and journalist. He has written a series of bestselling books, including The Blue Zones of Happiness and The Blue Zones Kitchen: 100 Recipes for Living to 100. He is also the host of the Netflix show, Live to 100: Secrets of the Blue Zones.

This is the kickoff official interview of our Get Fit Sanely series. (If you missed it, go back and check out the informal chat I posted on Friday with lead producer, DJ Cashmere). This is the third time we’ve done Get Fit Sanely, and in this go-round, we’ll be covering not only longevity but also ozempic, exercise, and the Buddhist case for laziness. 

In this episode we talk about:

• The origin story of the Blue Zones
• The nine common denominators, or Power Nine, to longevity.
• The surprising information about much maligned foods such as pasta and bread
• Why trying to pursue good health can actually work against you
• Why the single most important factor in longevity isn’t advertised on instagram 
• Tips for integrating Blue Zones wisdom into your daily life, including designing a life where you move more naturally
• And some of the critiques and controversies surrounding his work

Related Episodes:

• Get Fit Sanely Playlist

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Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/dan-buettner

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Mindful movement is an excellent way to integrate and even invigorate mindfulness while cultivating the power of curious awareness.

About Dawn Mauricio:

Dawn Mauricio discovered the practices of Buddhist meditation in 2005, and from then on, did what any well-intentioned perfectionist would do — plunge in head first! Since then, she's graduated from several teaching programs, including Spirit Rock's four-year Teacher Training. Her teaching style is playful, dynamic, and heartfelt, and she teaches extensively in her home-country of Canada, as well as the US, to teens, people of color, and folks of all backgrounds.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Gentle Mindful Movement.”

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How to pursue fitness without succumbing to the “subtle aggression of self-improvement.”

The kickoff episode for the latest installment of an occasional series we do here on the show, called Get Fit Sanely (listen to past – and future – episodes here). 

In this candid conversation, managing producer DJ Cashmere talks with Dan about how they manage their mindsets on these issues, and how the interviews we’re doing on the subject have and have not impacted them. We’ll also preview the guests for this fresh round of Get Fit Sanely, where we cover longevity, Ozempic (and related weight loss drugs), the latest science on exercise, and the Buddhist case for laziness.

The cost of getting lean infographic. 

Related Episodes:

• Get Fit Sanely Playlist
• The Science of Self-Compassion | Serena Chen
• The Anti-Diet | Evelyn Tribole
• 3 Buddhist Strategies for When the News is Overwhelming | Kaira Jewel Lingo

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Using your senses to reduce overthinking, turn down the voice in your head, and get out of what these scientists call "the house of habit."

Dr. Zindel Segal is Distinguished Professor of Psychology in Mood Disorders at the University of Toronto Scarborough and a cofounder of Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy.  Professor Norman Farb, PhD, is an Associate Professor of Psychology at the University of Toronto Mississauga, where he directs the Regulatory and Affective Dynamics laboratory. 

In this episode we talk about:

• How the brain’s default mode network is essential to our survival but also can keep us stuck in rumination and overthinking 
• Segal and Farb’s simple practice of “sense foraging” and why they say it can help break patterns and thoughts that aren’t serving us 
• The differences and the similarities between sense foraging and mindfulness 

Related Episodes:

Depression and Anxiety: Your Old Enemies, Your Best Friends | Zindel Segal

Gretchen Rubin on: How To Use Your Five Senses To Reduce Anxiety, Increase Creativity, and Improve Your Relationships

Why You Can’t Pay Attention - And How to Think Deeply Again | Johann Hari

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The radical shift in perspective that can come when we change our question from “what’s wrong with you” to “what happened to you?”

Dr. Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D. is the Principal of the Neurosequential Network and a Professor (Adjunct) at the School of Allied Health, Human Services and Sport, La Trobe University, Melbourne, Victoria  Australia. 

Over the last thirty years, Dr. Perry has been an active teacher, clinician and researcher in children’s mental health and the neurosciences holding a variety of academic positions. His work on the impact of abuse, neglect and trauma on the developing brain has impacted clinical practice, programs and policy across the world. Dr. Perry is the author, with Maia Szalavitz, of The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog, a bestselling book based on his work with maltreated children and Born For Love: Why Empathy is Essential and Endangered. Dr. Perry's most recent book, What Happened to You? Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing (2021), co-authored with Oprah Winfrey, has been translated into 26 languages and has been on the New York Times Bestseller list for over 100 weeks after becoming #1 on the list in April of 2021.

Related Episodes:

• The Art and Science of the World's Gooiest Cliche | Barbara Fredrickson
• How to Live with the Worst Things That Ever Happened to You | Stephanie Foo
• An Ace Therapist Gives Dan A Run For His Money | Dr. Jacob Ham
• Deep Genealogy | Spring Washam
• Deep, Provocative Success Strategies From the “Yoda of Silicon Valley” | Jerry Colonna

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When you feel anxious about a difficult decision, meditation can help take the edge off and put you in touch with your own wisdom as a guide.

About Oren Jay Sofer:

Oren Jay Sofer teaches mindfulness, meditation and Nonviolent Communication. He has practiced meditation since 1997, beginning his studies in Bodh Gaya, India and is a long-time student of Joseph Goldstein, Michele McDonald, and Ajahn Sucitto, and is a graduate of the IMS/Spirit Rock Teacher Training program. Oren teaches retreats across the country and works as Senior Program Developer at Mindful Schools, teaching and developing curricula for one of the international leaders of mindfulness in education.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Making A Tough Decision.”

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Radical advice on rethinking success, individualism, and the American dream.

Mia Birdsong is a pathfinder, culture change visionary, and futurist. She is the founding Executive Director of Next River, a think tank and culture change lab for interconnected freedom. In her book How We Show Up: Reclaiming Family, Friendship, and Community, Mia maps swaths of community life and points us toward the promise of our collective vitality. 

In this episode we talk about:

• How to build community
• What it looks like in her own life
• Mutuality vs reciprocity 
• How to work with resentment and rejection 
• The etymological connection between friendship and freedom 
• The transformative power of asking for help
• And why she thinks the idea of bootstrapping—or going it alone—is a kind of self-hatred

Related Episodes:

• How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make and Keep Friends | Dr. Marisa G. Franco
• The Many Benefits of a “Paradox Mindset” | Dolly Chugh. Ten Percent Happier
• Escape From Zombieland | Koshin Paley Ellison — Ten Percent Happier 
• An Uncomfortable (But Meaningful) Conversation About Race | Lama Rod Owens

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The surprisingly common experience of near death experiences and what science still can't explain about them.

Sebastian Junger is the #1 New York Times Bestselling author of The Perfect Storm, Fire, A Death in Belmont, War and Tribe, and In My Time of Dying. As an award-winning journalist, a contributing editor to Vanity Fair and a special correspondent at ABC News, he has covered major international news stories around the world, and has received both a National Magazine Award and a Peabody Award.

In this episode we talk about:

• Junger’s near death experience and the impact it had on him
• The conclusions he came to after investigation the possibilities of an afterlife 
• The mysteries of quantum physics and what they might tell us about life and death
• How he believes we can all experience awe on a daily basis 

Related Episodes:

How Thinking About Death Can Improve Your Life | Alua Arthur

Neil DeGrasse Tyson on Why Having a “Cosmic Perspective” Will Help You Do Life Better

George Saunders on: “Holy Befuddlement” and How to Be Less of a “Turd”

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Explore the preciousness of a new day with greater joy and ease while giving plenty of space to feel grumpy about it all.

About Alexis Santos:

Alexis has practiced and taught Insight Meditation in both the East and West since 2001. He has been a long-time student of Sayadaw U Tejaniya (a well respected meditation teacher in Burma whose teachings have attracted a global audience), and his teaching emphasizes knowing the mind through a natural and relaxed continuity -- a style of practice that's particularly useful during our crazy lives. Alexis has completed the Spirit Rock/IMS Teacher Training, teaches retreats across the globe, and currently lives in Portland, Maine.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “When Waking Up Is Tough.”

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How to find your voice when you need to be heard, learn when it's smart to choose silence, and communicate better with the people who matter most.

Elaine Lin Hering is a former Lecturer on Law at Harvard Law School. She works with organizations and individuals to build skills in communication, collaboration, and conflict management. She has served as the Advanced Training Director for the Harvard Mediation Program and a Managing Partner for Triad Consulting Group. She has worked with coal miners at BHP Billiton, micro-finance organizers in East Africa, mental health professionals in China, and senior leadership at the US Department of Commerce. She is the author of the forthcoming book Unlearning Silence: How to Speak Your Mind, Unleash Talent, and Live More Fully.

In this episode we talk about:

• How we learn silence and self-editing 
• How we often miscalculate the cost-benefit when it comes to speaking up or staying silent
• Elaine’s four steps to learn how to speak up and find your voice
• How we can unintentionally silence others, especially those closest to us, and what to do about it  

Related Episodes:

How to Speak Clearly, Calmly, and Without Alienating People | Dan Clurman and Mudita Nisker

How to Call People In (Instead of Calling Them Out) | Loretta Ross

Do You Feel Like an Imposter? | Dr. Valerie Young (Co-Interviewed by Dan’s Wife, Bianca!)

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An acclaimed science writer on how to upgrade your mind by using more than your head.

When you think about thinking, most of us think of it as a supremely solo pursuit. You’re in your head, concentrating and cogitating, all by yourself. But the science shows that if you want to improve your thinking, you need to get out of your head. Today we’re going to talk about a concept called “the extended mind.” Your mind isn’t just in your skull: it’s in your body, it’s in the people around you, it’s in your surroundings. The best thinking requires that you break out of what the writer David Foster Wallace called “the skull sized kingdom” and access these other resources.

This may sound abstract, but our guest today makes it very practical. Annie Murphy Paul is an acclaimed science writer whose work has appeared in the New York Times, the Boston Globe, Scientific American, Slate, Time, and The Best American Science Writing, among many other publications. She is the author of Origins and The Cult of Personality, hailed by Malcolm Gladwell as a “fascinating new book.” Currently a fellow at New America, Paul has spoken to audiences around the world about learning and cognition; her TED talk has been viewed by more than 2.6 million people. A graduate of Yale University and the Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism, she has served as a lecturer at Yale University and as a senior advisor at their Poorvu Center for Teaching and Learning. Her latest book is The Extended Mind: The Power of Thinking Outside the Brain

In this episode, we also talk about:

• How to use your surroundings to think better 
• My favorite of the three areas of this book – thinking with our relationships
• Why “groupthink” isn’t always a bad thing (OR you can say, the benefits of thinking in groups)
• What she called “extension inequality” – that this benefit of the extended mind isn’t available to all people

Related Episodes: Ancient Secrets to Modern Happiness | Tamar Gendler

Full Shownotes: https://www.tenpercent.com/tph/podcast-episode/anniemurphypaul

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Connecting to self-compassion can be really tough. Ease the struggle by imagining your loved ones sending care & support your way.

About Jess Morey:

Jess Morey is a lead teacher, cofounder and former executive director of Inward Bound Mindfulness Education which runs in-depth mindfulness programming for youth, and the parents and professionals who support them across the US, and internationally. She began practicing meditation at age 14 on teen retreats offered by the Insight Meditation Society (IMS), and has maintained a consistent commitment to meditation since. Diving head first into meditation at such a key developmental stage makes the revelatory perspective of mindfulness & compassion her natural home turf, and gives her an easy, conversational teaching style anyone can relate to.

For more information on Inward Bound: https://inwardboundmind.org/

For more information on the Contemplative Semester: https://www.contemplativesemester.org/

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “Compassion For Yourself.”

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Practical advice from a straight-talking former criminal and occasionally profane dharma teacher.

Vinny Ferraro is the Guiding Teacher of the Big Heart City Sangha in San Francisco and has led a weekly sitting group for almost two decades. As a fully empowered Dharma Teacher thru Spirit Rock/IMS, he has taught residential retreats at Spirit Rock, Insight Meditation Society, and the Esalen Institute. Currently, he leads Spirit Rock's Year to Live course and teaches retreats and daylongs through Big Heart City and meditation centers across the country. He is a respected leader in developing and implementing interventions for at-risk populations. leading groups in schools, juvenile halls and prisons since 1987. He has led emotional intelligence workshops for over 100,000 youth on four continents.

In this episode we talk about:

• Alignment
• Vinny‘s concept of “flashing your basic goodness”
• Noting practice
• The deep satisfaction in not seeking satisfaction
• Redirecting awareness
• Being an “empathetic witness” for yourself
• When to opt for distraction
• Not taking what’s not yours 
• Vinny’s ancestor practice
• What is the connection between seeing our family patterns and not taking what is not ours?  
• How loyal have we been to our suffering?

Related Episodes:

• Get Happier Without Losing Your Edge | Kamala Masters
• Vitamin E: How To Cultivate Equanimity Amidst Political Chaos | Election Sanity Series | Roshi Joan Halifax
• Non-Preachy Ethics | Jozen Tamori Gibson

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Actionable advice on working with one of the few socially acceptable vices.

Whilst striving for perfection might seem logical on some level, it’s not actually attainable. And the research shows it can lead to burnout, stress, anxiety, depression, relationship problems, reduced productivity, and reduced resilience.

Thomas Curran is a professor in the Department of Psychological and Behavioral Science at the London School of Economics and is the author of The Perfection Trap: Embracing the Power of Good Enough. 

In this episode we talk about:

• The definition of perfectionism – it’s more than just high standards
• The 3 flavors of perfectionism
• The surprising findings on perfectionism and gender 
• Perfectionism VS imposter syndrome 
• The root of perfectionism 
• The variables that lead to perfectionism 
• Thomas’ critiques on capitalism and growth mindset
• How to actually implement mantras like “progress not perfection” and “embracing good enough”
• 4 elements to combat imperfectionism 
• The recipe for achieving inner abundance
• How to make good work without caring what other people think of you?
• And parenting and perfectionism 

Related Episodes:

• Do You Feel Like an Imposter? | Dr. Valerie Young (Co-Interviewed by Dan's Wife, Bianca!) 
• How To End The War With Your Body | Sonya Renee Taylor.
• The Science of Failing Well | Amy Edmondson
• Dr. Mark Epstein On: How To Transform Your Neuroses Into “Little Shmoos”
• The Zen of Therapy | Mark Epstein 
• Weird Dreams, Family Relationships, and Collective Trauma I Dr. Mark Epstein

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What is happiness? Investigate how happiness is created, what it’s really like, and learn to access the simple happiness of right now.

About Jay Michaelson:

Rabbi Dr. Jay Michaelson is the author of ten books, including his newest, The Secret That Is Not A Secret: Ten Heretical Tales. In his “other career,” Jay is a columnist for The Daily Beast, and was a professional LGBTQ activist for ten years. Jay is an ordained rabbi and has taught meditation in secular, Buddhist, and Jewish context for eighteen years.

To find this meditation in the Ten Percent Happier app, you can search for “What Is Happiness.”

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Talking creativity and sanity with one of the world’s biggest pop stars.

British-Albanian singer-songwriter Dua Lipa emerged as a global pop sensation with her captivating blend of sultry vocals, empowering lyrics, and infectious beats. Born in London in 1995 to Albanian parents, Lipa's musical journey began at a young age, inspired by her father's own musical career. She hosts the podcast Dua Lipa: At Her Service, and her latest album is Radical Optimism. 

In this episode we talk about:

• What she means by radical optimism – and how it applied when she literally fell on stage
• How she resists the temptation to fully armor herself
• Her famous work ethic and packed schedule  
• Her non-negotiable daily practices, including meditation
• Her social media hygiene (specially, how to stay sane when nearly 80 million people follow you on Instagram alone)
• And we have a great conversation about creativity, including how she builds psychological safety with her team in studio and on tour
• Why she had to write 97 songs to make this one album
• And her concept of “writing herself into a good idea” – as she says, “You have to be shit to be good.” 

Related Episodes:

• Bill Hader on Anxiety, Imposter Syndrome, and Leaning into Discomfort
• Pema Chödrön, Renowned Buddhist Nun, On Her One Non-Negotiable Happiness Strategy
• The Science of Hope | Jacqueline Mattis
• Hope Is a Skill | George Mumford
• Discomfort: A Counterintuitive Source of Hope | Sebene Selassie

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A research-backed plan for getting your sh*t together in every possible sphere.

We’re going to talk about some smart strategies today with Emma Seppälä, Ph.D. She is a psychologist and research scientist, with an expertise in the science of happiness, emotional intelligence, and social connection. She is the Science Director of Stanford University’s Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education and she also teaches executives at the Yale School of Management. She’s been on this show before, to discuss her best-selling book The Happiness Track. And today she’s back to discuss her new book, Sovereign: Reclaim Your Freedom, Energy, and Power in a Time of Distraction, Uncertainty, and Chaos.