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Ask Christopher West

The Nitty Gritties of Discernment | ACW113

30 min • 1 mars 2021

How should I counsel someone who wants to follow the Church's teaching while his wife wants to use contraception? Should I break up with my girlfriend since we've been falling to sexual sin? How can I discern between cellibacy and marriage when those around me are convinced of my path?

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

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Q1: As a priest, I have been trying to help someone who is struggling within his marriage about contraception – specifically, he wants to follow the Church's teaching, but his wife does not. What advice can you give me about how to counsel him?

Q2: My girlfriend and I have been struggling to live out the church's teaching on pre-marital sex and have fallen into sin a few times. Sometimes this leads to arguments between us where I voice how I feel like I have to choose between her and God when we sin. However, I also recognise our relationship isn't just about our struggles with sexual sin and she does inspire me in many other ways to grow closer in my relationship with the Lord. I'm unsure whether it's God's will for me to break up with her or continue to struggle to be chaste with her.

Q3: Hello Christopher and Wendy! First, thank you so much for the joy and witness you bring as a married couple. Your example has brought so much healing to my view of marriage so from the bottom of my heart thank you. For my question: I had been discerning religious life for a long time but recently felt the call to start discerning marriage instead. Whenever I tell my friends this, they typically say something along the lines of, "Well, God is probably just calling you to marriage with Him." This language has truly been so painful because I feel like I can no longer even read about the beauty of what marriage can be because I am constantly told it's not for me. Could you please speak to this?

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Resources mentioned this week:

Theology of the Body Institute Course Schedule

TOB Virtual Conference

VADEMECUM FOR CONFESSORS CONCERNING SOME ASPECTS OF THE MORALITY OF CONJUGAL LIFE

Good News about Sex & Marriage

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Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

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