Dear Old Dads

After some talk about playing the lottery, the dads discuss marrying for looks and marrying for money. Also, is Tom capable of dying? Thomas and Eli have a comprehensive debate.

You reallllly don't want to miss the Patreon extended edition of this one in which Eli accidentally reveals the extent of his ignorance of how any technology works.

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Thomas brings us an impossible conundrum that was shared in an article recently: two couples were undergoing IVF, their samples were mixed up, and they unknowingly gave birth to the other's baby. Would you let your genetic offspring go and continue your family with the baby you've already been raising and loving for a year, or would you want to reunite with your biological child?

But the question Lydia knows you've all been waiting for...did the dads remember to rip into it this week?

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The Toms would like to talk about some of the greatest parenting advice they ever saw. And it's a meme. Or like, a tweet or something. But it's that good.

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No idea if we're being scammed or not but assuming it's real, he's got a lot to tell us about his horrific Christmas.

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Lydia joins Thomas and Eli to talk about a recent NYT article about the hidden grief of not becoming a grandparent. How would we feel if our children decided they didn't want kids?

(Fingers crossed, this should hopefully be the last of the no-Tom episodes!)

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Lydia and Heath are with us as we tackle a listener question about a situation regarding their child's karate class, and we discuss what makes a coach good or bad. We're releasing the patron version for everyone because the bonus story just needs to be heard. It features t

And yes, the audio still sucks since this was the same recording session. Last one!

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We were not able to locate the actor who normally plays Tom so in this episode he has been replaced by the combined forces of Lydia Smith and Heath Enright. The 4 of us discuss an article about a free-range parenting experiment.

Note: I (Thomas) made a blunder in the recording of this podcast and had to use backup audio which combines Lydia and I. As a result, the quality is a little sub-optimal to a degree that may even be noticeable to normal human people. I could apologize, but no one is more upset about it than me, so does that really make sense? I think I'll apologize to myself and then not accept my own apology.

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Eli had an interesting situation come up with Max involving another kid being potentially a bad influence. What should we do in this situation? And then he realizes he has never told us his infamous "Pot Party" story...

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Tom shares a post from Reddit's Am I the Asshole and the dads debate the asshole-ranking of all of the characters involved.

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Eli's got a parenting question and his facebook parenting group has... answers.

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The dads discuss politeness - what it is, how to instill it in your kids, and if it actually matters in the world. Also, how polite should we be with our closest friends and partners, and is there harm to being too polite in those relationships?

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We all know video games are how satan steals your kids' souls. But what if that's all they want to do? And what if they become homicidal maniacs while playing them?

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Parenting is so friggen hard nowadays that the Surgeon General had to issue a report saying so. He probably received a few too many emails from his kid's school and was like ENOUGH, I'm writing a report.

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The dads all came in to record a new episode after the results of the election, and reflect on how to talk to kids about what happened, what may happen in this future administration, and what our responsibility is to others as we navigate the darkest timeline.

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Did Eli overreact to another parent's verbal reminders for Max to "Dracula Sneeze?" How should we approach these sorts of situations to best advocate for our children? Should we be bossing other people's kids around or what?

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The Curry household has an intense curfew debate. Is Tom insane this time? Or is it the children who are wrong.

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Shall we...rip into it? Thomas kicks things off in sharing perhaps a breakthrough (dear god please) with Screamy Smith, and Tom carries us home with an Am I The Asshole post about children needing to earn celebration. Stick around for Eli's impression of his sister! Rip into it.

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After a brief half of the episode talking sovereign citizens for some reason, the dads discuss the challenges of libido mismatches. Rip into it.

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The dads start off with a conversation about people diagnosing themselves with stuff using TikTok and other methods, but then the episode is diverted with a stunning revelation about Eli's brain...

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Tom was having some deep thoughts on consent and how we're teaching it to our boys. Is it possibly damaging to their self-esteem? How could we do it better?

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This is a personal one - Tom shares an important update about a member of the Curry family, with their permission. But first! A story about how Tom may have actually changed the toxically masculine heart and mind of a car salesman. Also patrons, no need to listen to the end of the show if you're in the Facebook group. You already got the only necessary part of this particular Disneyland story from Lydia. What Thomas shares here is basically the same info...this is definitely not Lydia writing this. Promise. Rip into it.

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The Dads are back already?! You better believe it. We're here for part two of our discussion regarding micro-cheating, working our way through that 21-item listicle. Some major revelations are shared between the dads.

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We couldn't fit the fun of this one in a single episode, so we have a two-parter where the dads go through a list of behaviors that are considered examples of micro-cheating...or are they? You'll be surprised on who teams up for some of these! BUT FIRST - an imperative update on whether or not Thomas could do a pull-up! AND AFTER - a fantastic story from the Curry Clan!

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Let's face it, men can be pretty delusional about their athletic and physical abilities. But surely, none of the men on THIS podcast, right? RIGHT???

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The Smiths went to Disneyland and much happiness (and insanity) ensued!

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Eli shares a story from when he solo parented Max during Anna's very real-sounding-named fiddle festival, and the dads discuss what it means to have a child that's different in some way and the things they have to keep in mind when experiencing a world not necessarily built for them.

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Eli witnessed an interaction in Target that raised the questions: How do you tell your kids when you can't afford something? Or, how do you tell them when you absolutely could afford something, but they really don't need it and have too much already?

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The dads are back with some more Doug Emhoff/Tim Walz content. A son dared to feel unrestricted joy and love for his dad at a thrilling time, and after some important discussino, the dudes are here to make fun of the right wing tweets that are upset about it.

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Republicans see themselves as the party of men and manliness, but are they? Or are they the party whiny fragile little weird douchebags? Democrats, on the other hand, have some great examples of masculinity this election cycle: Second Gentleman Doug Emhoff and Governor Tim Walz - America's Dads. And this episode was recorded before the DNC even started. (You can tell because Thomas isn't openly sobbing the entire time about Gus Walz.)

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Phoebe got a haircut recently and picked out something different than most kids her age, but it just spoke to her. The dads examine their own childhood approach to invention and reinvention of their self, and the methods they employ to help raise happy and healthy young adults that aren't as hung up on changing things up. Also somehow we talk for an extended period of time about the CEO of Jimmy John's being...intimate...with a shark.

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Today's discussion is focused on a tweet that caused a bit of a stir between the child-rearing and the child-free regarding finding meaning in life without children. Will the dads end up three-bearsing it?

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Recently, Tom has been challenging a family dynamic that is unwittingly "othering" one of the kids. The dads talk about being a black sheep, and the role parents can play in mitigating that risk in the future. And only patrons get to hear the bonus story where Tom had the chance to...rip into it.

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The dads talk about spaces and events being inclusive and exclusive of kids. What do we do when our friends or family are creating the space but are oblivious to (or dismissive of) the significant logistics that are part of these decisions for parents?

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We've got a Reddit hypothetical that launches some great philosophical discussion regarding the push and pull of morality when our partners and kids would bear the sacrifice. We also discover Tom and Thomas are actually literal twins, and it freaks them out as much as it's bound to freak all of you out just reading it here.

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First, Eli gives us a bit of a lesson on the CrowdStrike situation for some reason. Then, Thomas's family has turned him into something he never thought he'd be. He shares the story of his shame in having to hire help.

Warning: this one gets yelly.

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Eli's TikTok-ery continues in this episode as the dudes discuss effectively advocating for your kid and tools to counter our, often unhelpful, natural reactions in that advocacy.

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It's an episode of updates in some stereotypical dad arenas: construction and taxes. Eli explains his experience of anger as he tackles his construction headache, while Thomas does something UNTHINKABLE to try and solve the dads' tax problems.

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The dads talk about getting older, and accidentally discover they're all on diets and mad about it. Tom shares his theory which kicks off a discussion about the common aging outcomes for men. Rip into it.

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Very Famous TikToker Eli shared a video with Tom and Thomas, and the dads get into a discussion about how much physical affection is appropriate in front of your kids. What about in a public place where other kids may be? How much of this is just shaped by society at this particular point in time, and should that be challenged?

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Eli has had a revelation regarding his previously stated psychopathic opinion on apologizing. His new position is... psychopathic but less?

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They're calling it Hermeneutic Labor! Tom read an article about this and he's mad about it. Or at least, we think he is. We haven't been able to interpret his feelings and frankly we don't really care enough to bother.

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...and I'll do my sadfishing all over the place. An article from Parents described the phenomenon of sadfishing, wherein youngsters post vague, emotional statuses, photos, memes, etc. in the hopes of support and community as they navigate some of those tough moments, but do they actually receive what they're looking for?

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The dads discuss how they celebrated their Father's Day this year before checking out some REALLY HELPFUL fatherhood advice from other dads that was published in the New York Times. Seriously, you won't believe how helpful it is.  /s

And patrons get multiple stories in today's bonus, including a really heartwarming update! You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll keep your mouth shut when you're around Max.

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This dads discuss how family trips and activities might be harder on kids than we realize. Are we putting too many expectations on our kids? How do we have a successful family trip? For extended episodes, bonus content, and most importantly, for an AD FREE SHOW, make sure to pledge on Patreon! Join the Facebook Group! facebook.com/groups/dearolddads For comments, email [email protected]

Thomas's kids finished the baseball season and it was a very surprising success. However, what's next? At a certain point, Phoebe will have to start playing a different game entirely, for some reason, called softball. Why the inequality on that? What other aspects of our kids' lives feature this kind of thing?

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The dads have been through a year-long tax weirdness that just resulted in the state of CA freezing Tom's kid's bank accounts. No normal episodes can happen until the grievances have been aired.

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The dads listen to the recent commencement speech from Harrison Butker that is way more inside Catholic baseball than they expected, but also Eli disturbingly understands every single reference. Are women people? Should they be allowed to vote and have jobs? This sentient mayonnaise has opinions.

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We are finally covering an r/AITA that Eli sent a million years ago, and it's honestly a bit nonsensical but it launches Eli into one of the most amazing things you'll hear in Dear Old Dads history. Buckle up!

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Thomas shares some medical news for one of the Smith kids, and the dads chat about how to show up for your child, and talk to them, in tough situations that aren't their choice, especially if you carry your own personal history and experiences with that same diagnosis. A great conversation all around and a couple of admissions that Tom's take...is...right?

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On r/AmItheAsshole, a woman shares a moment she had with her ex-husband at their child's funeral and the subsequent reaction from his new wife. In seeking comfort, who do you turn to, and what boundaries do you have with others as your dynamic with them changes? We'll just say...the guys do not see eye to eye on this one.

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If you're a parent of more than one child, chances are you have 1 or more kids who are super easy and chill, and 1 or more kids who is... not. How do we handle that? What's going on there? The dads discuss, and they NAME NAMES.

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AI technology is advancing ridiculously quickly. Some day, if not today, AI image generators will be able to create incredibly realistic pornographic photos and video of... anyone. Including children. So, what are our responsibilities as dads? Is it possible to make this technology safe for our kids, and if it isn't, who bears responsibility for that?

Also, little easter egg: only patrons will know what the constant noise in Tom's background is. You need to have heard the April 2024 bonus to be in the know!

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The dads discuss when men completely ignore their health in the name of "being tough" and then as a result the women in their lives have to take care of them and arrange their medical visits and track their medications and do a million other things. But the man is TOUGH. So manly.

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The one and only Arlo turned 5 years old! Thomas shares the details from what he considers the best birthday party ever, and the dads chat about the pressure of kid birthday parties and the glory of one Charles Entertainment Cheese. And, the amazing patrons get a sack update; whose sack will it be this time? Trick question, it's always Eli's sack.

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Eli has been teaching Max to read... OR HAS HE. Max is an amazing reader already and the dads talk about how their kids learn anything and whether or not it is, in fact, magic. Then for reasons that will likely come out in litigation, Tom and Eli hijack the show to talk about books. Thomas is filing suit and cannot comment further about this episode at the current time.

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It's time for another "Am I the Asshole" iteration of Dads! This time it's a dad who won't call to order pizza for his daughter who has anxiety. But there are a lot of details that make or break the assholeness. The dads go on to talk about challenges like this they've had with their kids.

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Do you know that couple? Are you that couple? That gives each other shit a lot. Like, a lot. And it's all "joke" but is it though? Thomas had a recent encounter with one such couple and has thoughts.

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Eli came back from a bro-cation and the dads chat about friendships, making friends as a dad, and different approaches to spending time with friends. Disclaimer: you may hear Thomas die in this episode (of laughter).

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During and after COVID, there were many think pieces about the inadequacies of the nuclear family. Tom wants to talk about it. Should we all be living with our parents? Jesus Christ should we? Ugh, but like, ugh should we? I guess?

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Thomas and his family went to a memorial service recently; this sparks discussion about...well... Tom and Eli's business ideas?

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What responsibility do we have as role models for our kids to help them keep their own expectations of their skills, development, and identity reasonable for their age? A text between Tom and his son kicks off the discussion for this extra-long episode. And Thomas has his semiannual bone to pick with clocks changing.

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Do men know how to ask for non-sexual intimacy? Do they tend to over-sexualize any kind of touch? That dads discuss a Trevor Noah clip about men needing physical intimacy and not knowing how to get it.

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After Eli tries a few new catchphrases that absolutely do not catch on, the dads talk about when kids protect their parents.

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For a dad who is always used to trying to be encouraging, to help his talented kid keep going when they are discouraged, what does he do when... the opposite? When a kid is... extremely bad at something, but is completely convinced they are good? Look, we all know which extremely bad decisions are wrong there, but what about as the kid gets older? Is there a time when a little more realism is warranted?

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The dads talk about if they celebrate Valentine's Day, what it means to tend to your relationship, and how to show up for your partner over time. Do kids change this? Is it okay if they do? Also, Tom MAY OR MAY NOT sing in this one. Plus! Eli has a *very* spicy patron-only, sworn-to-secrecy, story.

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We've got a bit of a jackhole and Hyde situation in this episode. Eli confessed an entire murder plot on the air for some reason. And Thomas is... trying to get his kids to do ice skating. I don't know, man, what do you want from me. Eli is going to ice a guy and Thomas has got his kids on the ice OHHHH that's it.

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Today's episode is centered on an Am I The Asshole post on Reddit that is an absolute doozy. It inspires a fun and hilarious conversation about jealousy, monogamy, monogamy, and... whatever Tom is.

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Tom wants to talk about grumpiness in our kids. And maybe ourselves. How do we handle that? How does it change as kids get older? Also, bonus question, what's like the main trick a magician does?

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Big news in the Smith household! Phoebe lost her first tooth and Thomas and Lydia had to figure out tooth fairying for the first time. Did they pull it off? How much money are you supposed to leave kids per tooth nowadays anyway?

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Eli's son Max is changing schools, and the person who is having the hardest time with it is... Eli. The dads talk about transitions and mourning each passing phase. Well, not Tom, obviously.

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This episode is... about... COVID I guess? You'll see. It'll all make sense. Or not.

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The dads talk about how they deal with issues of safety. How should they talk to their kids about "bad guys?"

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Ho Ho Ho! Are you the Grinch or Buddy the Elf? The dads talk about, well, pretty everything but Christmas. But then they remember what they were doing, and talk about embracing Christmas celebrations, whether or not certain holiday movies hold up (HOT TAKE ALERT), and enjoying the magic of the season.

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The Dads continue the fun look at what dudes on Reddit say emasculated them. This one gets deep. Real... deep...

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The dads take on a 12 year old Reddit post about women accidentally emasculating dudes. And sooooo much is revealed in the process.

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100 episodes! Woohoo!!! To celebrate, we brought on 3 very special guests. And, well... chaos ensued. But an entertaining chaos, it was!

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In a bit of a continuation of last episode, the dads discuss judging people for their hobbies. Is it valid? And NO we're not counting murder as a hobby or anything like that. 

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Eli recently came across a wedding-related post on r/AITA and the guys hash out whether or not the couple is the asshole. Who is a wedding for? Also, Eli subjects Tom and Thomas to the worst wedding vows ever so now you all must be subjected to it too.

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Tom hates his son's girlfriend and wants to know how to get rid of her. That sounds worse than it is... wait no that sounds about right. The dads talk about when you don't like someone's partner. Should you say something? If so, how? Will they listen? The tactics get creative.

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Let's all go around the podcast and say what we're thankful for, starting with you. Three gratidudes talk about gratitude for this Thanksgiving special!

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The dads talk school boards. Eli starts off with a hilarious but also brilliant tale of how he is vetting candidates in his district. Tom has had some disheartening experiences with his school board. And Thomas has seen the consequences of when a religious nut job takes over a school board. (though fortunately it was not his district but a nearby one)

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How do the dads differ when it comes to a hypothetical unplanned (and unwanted) pregnancy? What kind of say should men get to have in the decisions of their partners in terminating or keeping the pregnancy? What kind of moral obligation do men have with the outcome of those decisions?

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The dads talk about their experience with body issues and unrealistic male body expectations. How do we help our kids not feel like shit about their bodies? How do we not feel like shit about our bodies? Why does Eli wear full body thongs to live shows?

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Thomas posted a poll in the Facebook group regarding last week's OnlyFans episode and the results were... not good for Eli. Then, a recent Washington Post podcast episode centered on a family that is for some reason trying to stay together despite the son turning in the dad for his actions on Jan 6. The dad is not sorry. The guys discuss if they would have done the same, if blood is thicker than water, and if forgiveness is real or ever deserved by those who have hurt us and others.

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In which Tom and Thomas interview some sort of alien or troll

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Tom didn't write the title because he treats the word "potty" like one of his exes. Doesn't exist. Anyway, POTTY TRAININGGGGGG! Eli is starting Max on potty training so we all reminisce.

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After disclosing some serious friendship-ending habits, Eli shares breaking news and the dads discuss processing diagnoses and not-diagnoses, as well as navigating resources and advocating for their kids. Also, Tom regularly pulls the Mean Girls conference call tactic with insurance companies and healthcare providers. BUT IT WORKS.

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Tom's son recently asked him to teach him to fight. That's definitely a lot for any dad to process, and brings up a whole host of questions and thoughts and feelings. The dads work through some of that, and also Eli tells us about his nunchucks.

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Tools! The Toms love em! Eli is also here! Let's talk tool talk and talk man stuff tool talk. Tools. Hammer.

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Tom's ice skate tying debacle from the bonus story last episode (make sure you are a patron so you don't miss these!) inspired a whole episode. Is bragging about your kids good? Bad? What qualifies as bragging? How much kid talk is too much?

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Today the dads continue the discussion of what media is appropriate for our kids. Rated R movies? Sexual content? Violence? Horror? Just pure crap that sucks? 

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How much should we police or try to influence the stuff our kids watch? Terrible YouTube videos, video game streamers, awful tv shows... Should we seek to influence their tastes? Should we protect them from bad content?

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This is your dear old dads on drugs. How will you approach drugs and alcohol with your kids? Will you completely ban everything or will you be their dealer or something in between?

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Which should you want? Which do we have? Does it change if you're a parent, a child, a cousin, a stranger, etc? 

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In case you haven't seen it, Jonah Hill's ex posted some texts showing HIll to be a manipulative and controlling partner. They're pretty horrible. The dads use it as an opportunity to talk about possessiveness in men and the sexism behind it. 

And before that, some good Hank news!!!

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After some INCREDIBLY TRIGGER WARNING WORTHY dental horror stories from Tom and Eli, we talk about taking kids to the dentist. Phoebe had an appointment go wrong. How should we handle this?

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Today's episode is about secrets. Secrets with friends, with family, with your kids, with your partner. Should you keep them should you not? 

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Eli has a friend who has a kid who is prone to heavy emotional fits. The highs are high but the lows are low. Thomas has a friend who has a friend named Thomas who has a similar situation. What do we do? How do we not let them be the kid from the Twilight Zone?

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A listener asked us, what do you do when your partner has some... bad beliefs? What about when those beliefs affect the kids? Like your partner wants to give them fake medicine instead of medicine medicine...

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We need a vacation from our vacation, am I right??? Well am I? That's the topic of the show so you're going to need to tell me.

I'm sorry to speak so forwardly but you simply must pledge to hear the bonus stoy. It's another Tom classic. Not only that, it's TWO Tom classics in one. On a scale of 1 to Carwash Fightclub this is a Denny's parking lot brawl you do NOT want to miss!

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First up, some hilarious yard talk! But then Thomas has a long story which definitely eventually comes to a point. 

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Hooooh boy this ought to be good! 3 bears?

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...and your name is Tom and you live at 123 Tom's Address Chicago, Illinois... No just kidding! But am I? Let's talk playing with your kids, especially the most boring, tedious, monotonous stuff. But before that, Thomas has some kid news. Oh also, the bonus for this one is very meaty and you really shouldn't miss it. Become a patron!

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This one ended up being a pretty distinct two-parter! First up, some Thomas news and discussion of processing when a baby is literally driving you insane. Also, some sleep training talk and various other things. THEN, we get to the topic of reading your partner's phone. Thomas and Eli's opinions are probably boring and not insane, but what about Tom? He could go either way on this one and Thomas and Eli have a lot riding on it. Tune in and find out!

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Let's talk about exes! Should you be friends with them? Should you not? It's a classic DOD 3 bears situation!

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Arlo is obsessed with dinosaurs. Dinosaurs are obviously amazing but also the whole thing is bizarre. The dads discuss that, and other kid obsessions!

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Tom's son intentionally tanked his SAT, with his parents' full permission and endorsement. Eli and Thomas had an aneurism at this thought. Let's find out who is right and who is dead.

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Tom had a near death experience with a football

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Remy has unlocked a new super power. Arlo gets new shoes. And also, the perfect ending to the soccer saga. Tom and Thomas still grew up poor and weren't on the... fuckin...diamond cutting team or whatever Eli had at his school.

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It's no secret that the three of us are all madly in love with our partners. How do we keep that flame alive? This one is about date nights and keeping things exciting!

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Today's episode is about hydration... eventually.

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It may be a bit of a taboo among parents, but do we have a favorite kid? Should we feel bad about that? Should we tell that kid directly that they aren't our favorite like Tom's dad probably did? 

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Tom cursed himself last week by talking about how he and his family had avoided COVID because HOOO BOY does his entire family have COVID! We talk kids, doctors and health stuff, and also the challenges of parenting in a divorce situation.

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We're back! Ok I know it has already seemed like we're back, but this was actually the first episode recorded in March. We're catching up to real time. So it's a bit of a grab bag of things with a minor wrestling theme. Oh and a horrible Tom story, as always. It's so good to be back!

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Tom gives us some pointers on how to win your typical carwash fight club. No just kidding. This one is about having fights/arguments/disagreements with your partner. Is it healthy? How much is healthy? Is it unhealthy to NOT fight?

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Ok what the hell do we say when our kid asks what a church is

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What if our kids totally suck but are completely blissfully happy? Would that be a success as a parent? 

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Tom reads his blog entry on how to be likable.

Thank you all so much for allowing us a vacation month and we're excited to bring fresh Dad content in March!

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Tom reads his blog entry on privilege.

Thank you all so much for allowing us a vacation month and we're excited to bring fresh Dad content in March!

For Tom's full blog, go here!

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Happy day after Valentine's Day! In celebration, here is Tom's blog on romantic love.

Thank you all so much for allowing us a vacation month and we're excited to bring fresh Dad content in March!

For Tom's full blog, go here!

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Hey folks, listen in for a little announcement on this month's shows! If you are trying to JUST support Thomas, head to patreon.com/seriouspod.

Who are they and what are they and did they suck. 

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Or should we let them win. But then how will they ever learn? But seriously, what's the best way to teach our kids how to be able to lose things and not meltdown? Is it to always let them win? Crush them every single time? Or something in between?

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Are the dads sentimental? What are the heirlooms we were left, or that we plan on leaving? Also, boats.

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Smith child #3 came and the dudes gather to talk about Eli's cigar story! Oh and also the story of Scombert's birth. And Phoebe's... and Arlo's...

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That's right, today's show is about... clothes. But it's a more interesting topic than you might think. For example, as dads, how do we feel about our daughters wearing sexualizing clothing too young? And for us, how do we not look like complete garbage?

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First off, Eli has had a WEEK. And let's face it, it's always hilarious whenever Eli complains about anything. So that's the first half of the episode. Then it gets real real deep real real fast. How do we hold our friends accountable? And how do they hold us accountable? Or... do we not have any friends?

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Part 2! The conversation continues when Eli drops a hand grenade about personal responsibility.

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Merry Dadsmas! Tales of Christmas triumphs and woes

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This discussion went so long, it's a 2 parter! Lots of great discussion here, and of course we begin with several insane and hilarious stories including the obligatory Tom killing various lifeforms.

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Tom's got a theory and it makes a lot of sense!

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It's another QnA! Do we ever resent our kids? How much do we tell our kids about our own trauma? How did we name our kids? 

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Not to be confused with pure old fashioned incompetence.

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Where does it come from? Is it always bad? Did Tom's dad suck?

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The dads talk turkey! Thanksgiving coups, board games, political intrigue, crap family, friendsgiving... and a very long bonus segment for patrons!

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In a sorta follow up to the sexicode, we talk about the toxic dad mentally that you need to scare your daughter's prom date with a gun. Eli brought shirts and they're hilarious.

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Thomas, or more specifically Thomas's wife Lydia, had just about the worst day ever. It involves food allergies and also being creeped the hell out by murderers. Or not murderers. No idea.

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When a dad podcast and a topic love each other very much...

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After answering what was definitely a patron question about hating talking on the phone, we go on to answer what was mega definitely a patron question about being worried about our kids being impoverished or us losing our jobs. Money talk!

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In today's episode we talk about sports! No just kidding we do actually get to the friend zone and it's actually a pretty real conversation I feel slightly anxious about but that's probably a good sign.

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It's an extra sode! Here at Dear Old Dads, Spooktaculars are mandatory. EXTREME TRIGGER WARNING we discuss vegetarianism for like 3 minutes in the beginning but past that is some really excellent Spooktacular content.

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How should we deal with the fact that people who have caused us trauma clearly have issues of their own? What's the right balance of accountability, forgiveness, and willingness to cut people off?

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Finally, we're getting to nice guys and the friend zone!!! wait no what happened DAMN IT

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Folks, we set about to record an episode on Nice Guys. We never got to the topic. Instead, we record one of the funniest Dear Old Dads ever and offer it to you as an extra episode. Nice Guys is rescheduled to sometime in the future.

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Bad teacher stories, good teacher stories, COVID education stories, absolutely batshit Eli teacher stories. Also is homework a good idea? Should we just let our kids not do it? So many good questions.

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After a lot of highly relatable observational dad comedy about our kids and wives, we move onto Eli's baby medicine madness. Some stuff you can't give your baby at all, some you can't give until a certain age, and some has only recently been found to not do anything. From there we swap ER visit stories.

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Or should we immediately allow them to quit anything they want? It's an interesting question. Many of the things we now enjoy may have been things that were initially weird and anxiety inducing. But if we see our kids struggling, our impulse might be to rush to alleviate that. Also, SPORTS TALK!

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Being able to apologize and understand when you are wrong is a critical component of being a good person. But when/how/why/where/what is a good apology? What's a bad one? Should we MAKE our kids apologize? So much good stuff here plus an EXTRA long bonus conversation only for patrons at the end!

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***WARNING NOT FOR THE SQUEAMISH. LOTS OF ELI SACK TALK. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED***

Lots of goings on among the dads. Eli's nutsack has been brutally attacked by Dick Seaman and he's got a story to tell. Meanwhile, Thomas is on the run from the law for dropping off his kid wrong. But beyond that, there's a ton of good and hilarious stuff in this episode that you do not want to miss!

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Phoebe has started kindergarten and Thomas has failed to dad properly despite his best efforts. Also in case anyone forgot, Tom's mom killed a monkey. Also how do we deal with tantrums? How do we contain our anger when our kids really push our buttons? 

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Our parents were pretty much in the "you must go to college to get a good job!" generation. But how should we approach it with our kids? Is college valuable? Mandatory? But you absolutely must listen all the way, in the later half we swap science fair stories and we each had a completely different experience. Hilarity ensues!

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It's QnA 2! How do you know if you should have kids? Or maybe you shouldn't? Do we love our partners as much as we love our kids? Can a single mom do dad stuff? So much good stuff, and one of the heartiest laughs we've ever had, are in this qna! For extended episodes, bonus content, AND to be 1 week ahead of the normies, make sure to pledge on patreon! Join the Facebook Group! facebook.com/groups/dearolddads For comments, email [email protected] Follow us on Twitter: @DearOldDads Facebook Page: Dear Old Dads on Facebook Instagram: Dear Old Dads on Insta TikTok: @DearOldDads

If you were a bazillionaire and could make it such that your kids never had to work, would you? Or would you make them earn their way with gumption and elbow grease and such? The dads discuss.

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It's part 2 about chivalry! Tom is a very chivalrous old fashioned dude and we love him for it. Eli is also kind of that. Thomas is... just not. Who is right? Is anyone right? What's the line between chivalrous and condescending? Is chivalry an outdated concept that needs to die or is it a very charming, flattering behavior? Find out the absolutely 100% black and white answers to all these questions!

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Get ready to judge one of the dads real hard. And it's not the one who almost murdered a baby... True story. How much should we dote on our wives/partners? Should we sacrifice for their comfort? What about when it's a really big sacrifice and a really small comfort? Look forward to next week when we broaden the discussion to chivalry at large!

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Eli is a complete mess since he's left his son at daycare/school for the first time. We all talk about our experiences with that and the guilt (or not!) involved. Other topics - did we have daycare as kids? Tom being shafted by the 80s school system, and kids normalizing things. Make sure to get on the $2 patron level for the July Bonus! It's our hilarious parenting fails, and it was so much fun! For extended episodes, bonus content, AND to be 1 week ahead of the normies, make sure to pledge on patreon! Join the Facebook Group! facebook.com/groups/dearolddads For comments, email [email protected] Follow us on Twitter: @DearOldDads Facebook Page: Dear Old Dads on Facebook Instagram: Dear Old Dads on Insta TikTok: @DearOldDads

This episode is a delightful romp! A series of vignettes about our dadding experience, including: there's always that one asshole kid; Eli doing magic tricks for other parents; how much 'being an asshole' for your kid is appropriate; what do you do with a kid who won't wear clothes; and whoops! atheism. For extended episodes, bonus content, AND to be 1 week ahead of the normies, make sure to pledge on patreon! Join the Facebook Group! facebook.com/groups/dearolddads For comments, email [email protected] Follow us on Twitter: @DearOldDads Facebook Page: Dear Old Dads on Facebook Instagram: Dear Old Dads on Insta TikTok: @DearOldDads

At long last, we've finally devoted an episode to masculinity. How do we fix the terrible, emotionally stunted men in our society? What does it mean to be a good man and is it different than just being a good person? Also what kind of dudes are we? Who is the manliest man among us dad dudes? 

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What do you title the episode that has everything? This is a very special episode involving a very special announcement. But it also has so much more. Some ridiculous golf talk; does having more kids make you a worse parent; kids asking great questions and teaching each other; how we knew nothing back in the day; a story of heartbreak that teaches a life lesson; and what if you don't immediately feel attachment to your baby? So much here. Truly, do not miss this one.

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After discussing sleep and how our kids ruined ours for a while, we move onto the main topic of the day: privacy. Should kids have locked doors? Their own phones? Should you turn over your kid's room in random intervals like they live in a prison? Should you literally monitor every single device they're on 24/7? Or maybe should they get to be kinda like people? No one can say for sure. Except us.

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In today's Amazon-cheap-plastic-crap-everywhere world, it's so easy to spoil our kids. Before we know it, toys all over the place they don't even care about. Or is that just me? Either way, the dads talk about it, how they were spoiled or not, and how many books is too many! Has Eli ever ridden a bike? Find out!

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For this Father's Day Special, we talk about our plans, gift giving, other nonsense. Tantrums about nothing. Kids and heroin. ADHD. And we all say something nice about our dads, and then give our proudest dad moments.

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Bullies: the one topic that might turn these progressive dads into cave men. But should it? Is the problem solved now? Should we hit our bully's dad with our car? Also what if our kids are the bullies? Learn more about our backstories, and how Eli bullied an entire school.

It's the inaugural dadisode! In this first episode, we all talk about our backgrounds. Why and how are we dads? Also how were we dadded as kids? We quickly find out that our upbringings spanned a very interesting range of great to shitty. Is Tom's dad Hitler? Find out!