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Dr Justin Coulson’s Happy Families

#1236 - Do Men and Women Actually Communicate Differently?

13 min • 30 april 2025

Is it true that women speak far more than men—or is that just a stereotype? In this playful but thoughtful episode, Justin and Kylie Coulson unpack the latest research on gender and communication, challenge outdated myths, and explore what it means for raising connected, considerate kids. Plus, practical strategies for parents dealing with the infamous teenage grunt!


KEY POINTS:

  • Early studies suggested significant differences in the number of words men and women use daily—but newer research shows the gap is much smaller.

  • Adult women speak slightly more than men (around 1,400 extra words per day), but the difference is not dramatic.

  • Among adolescents and young adults, differences in word count are minimal.

  • In older adults (65+), men actually speak more than women.

  • Communication is essential to human connection and should be modelled intentionally in families.

  • Parents should teach teens to communicate considerately, even when they prefer silence.


QUOTE OF THE EPISODE:
“To be human is to communicate.”


RESOURCES MENTIONED:

  • Research study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology

  • Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus by John Gray (mentioned critically)

  • Happy Families website – happyfamilies.com.au


ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS:

  1. Model open and frequent communication—let your kids see healthy conversation at home.

  2. Teach empathy and consideration—encourage kids to respond kindly, even when they don't feel like talking.

  3. Invite teens into connection without pressure—engage them in activities like walks, drives, or casual outings.

  4. Normalise different communication styles—some kids need space; respect that while keeping the door open.

  5. Dump the old stereotypes—focus on building genuine, respectful communication, not fitting into outdated gender norms.

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