For several months now, my 5-year old has been playing with Army Men characters.
We set up epic battles together, and then he typically tells me something like, "My guy is going to snipe your guy!"
His army always seems to win — by a long shot!
I've loved this time with him.
And then I saw a dark side.
Let me begin by saying...
I have no problem with my sons playing "Good guy, bad buy" games.
I have no problem with my sons talking about, or acting out fighting scenes, as they often do with toy sticks, swords or other weapons they manufacture.
I have no problem with my sons learning how to protect themselves and others, figuratively and literally.
I have no problem with any child learning about the warrior that lives within them, and all of us.
As a kid, I got tremendous value from studying martial arts. I loved the karate kid movie. I played cops and robbers.
In church I learned about evil, and the forces that stood against it.
What I do have a problem with is...
Senseless violence.
I do have a problem when fighting has no moral compass.
I have a problem with attacking others from a place of anger or revenge.
"An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind." ― Mahatma Gandhi
I see a problem when fighting becomes an addiction, an identity, and the only place to feel and fuel power.
"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster." ― Friedrich Nietzsche
I have a problem if peace isn’t part of the conversation.
"Dad, how do soldiers killing each other solve the world's problems?" ― Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes
As Ocean played more and more with the army men, I realized there was only one conversation happening.
That conversation was about dominating and destroying me.
He had only one story in his mind -- win at all costs.
While I want my son feel like a winner, in this case, I felt the story he was living out daily needed some expansion.
To add texture and open his awareness around this subject, my wife and I decided to add some new characters to the story.
For Christmas, one of his presents were army men who instead of carrying bazookas, were doing yoga :)
*Click here to see how Ocean reacted! It's priceless.