How to Stop Yelling at Your Kids

Listener Tarcy reaches out this week with a question about how to stop yelling at her kids. She recognizes that it’s a bad habit, but struggles to stop. Do you yell at your kids sometimes? Or maybe your husband? Or co-workers? Let’s talk about why this happens and some ideas for ways to stop. Follow through. We need to teach our kids that we mean what we say the first time we say it, and this requires upfront discipline on our part. So hard! And yet so worthwhile in the long term! Listen to yourself. Pay attention to the ways you communicate to others, especially when angry or frustrated, and decide if that is what you want for your personal relationships. Remember that your kids will copy what you do. Do you want them to be “yellers”? Pay attention to the example you are setting. Whisper, or use a very calm and quiet voice to get your kids’ attention. It works surprisingly well! Check in with yourself and ways you might be tempted to compare yourself to others. Often, our frustrations with our families are borne of unfair comparisons to others. When you mess up, say you’re sorry. It is valuable for our kids to see ways in which we fall short of our ideals and how we work to fix it when that happens. Forgive yourself, and give them the opportunity to forgive you too! I also address a listener’s question about how to talk to friends and family who are leaving the Church because of the recent scandals. "When my kids were very little, I remember my oldest daughter running away from me when I was calling her to come do something, and I felt and heard that pounding blood pressure in my ears. I was having a physical response to the level of frustration I was feeling..."

Get full access to Girlfriends After Hours at daniellebean.substack.com/subscribe

To hear more, visit daniellebea.substack.com

This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit daniellebean.substack.com/subscribe