Today we’ll be talking with Dr. Sue Johnson, ground-breaking researcher, author, clinical psychologist, and leading innovator in the field of couple therapy. She is the primary developer of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) and the best-selling author of Hold Me Tight, and her latest book Love Sense: The Revolutionary New Science of Romantic Relationships.
Today we’re going to get down and dirty, talk about the tough stuff, what love is, what it isn’t, how to cultivate love, and what to do when love’s gone wrong. That plus survival of the nurtured over survival of the fittest, why attachments a GOOD thing, oxytocin, the cuddle hormone, why happy rats do the backstroke, and why we have things backwards when it comes to sex.
Well welcome to the show Sue, are you ready to shine?
Okay, before we dive right in, I’ve got to ask, is it great sex that builds strong relationships, or strong relationships that build great sex?
Topics and Questions Include:
- Is it sex that makes great love, or love that makes great sex?
- Why Love Sense is a warning, a revelation, and a promise
- How the “Code of Love” has been cracked
- Why Facebook’s killing romance!
- Why Love is not a mixture of sex and sentimentality, but an ancient wired-in survival code.
- Why society has it wrong when it comes to standing on your own two feet.
- Why Gorillas don’t hang out alone
- And why intelligent Gorillas check out things TOGETHER.
- And why only the idiot Gorilla’s go it on their own!
- The science behind love and humans as social beings
- Why Darwin never said it’s “survival of the species”
- Why it’s instead Survival of the Most Nurtured
- Why women getting shocked is a good thing!
- What in the world is the Cuddle Hormone?
- Why you have a direct connection between sex and your nervous system
- Why adult love and attachment is really just an adult version of the bond between mother and child
- How a mountain becomes a molehill through love and attachment
- How Winston Churchill found true love and how that helped the world!
- Why we need others to give us safe haven and a secure base to go out from into the world – and how this makes us stronger!
- How this affects women with careers
- Why long-term relationships are the exception rather than the world – and what in the world we can do about it?
- Why big fights are never about what you think they “ARE”.
- What is a Hold Me Tight conversation?
- Why James Bond does NOT have it going on!
- Why we’ve got things backwards when it comes to sex!
- Why Wailing Monkey Clasping Tree isn’t quite the way for optimal sex!
- Why sex novelties aren’t always the answer.
- What dramatically helps you for the bedroom!
- How tuning in and safety and tuning in leads to erotic play
- Why good sex is an enormous act of coordination!
- What assembling Ikea furniture and great sex have in common!
- How to find passion again and again – rather than keep it on ice!
- Online Pornography, the “porn trap” and sex addiction.
- To save the World read Hold Me Tight and Love Sense!