172. Is Marriage Worth It?

Can long-term relationships do more harm than good? Where is the line between intimacy and codependence? And should we all try to be more like Mike’s parents?

RESOURCES:

• "A Record-High Share of 40-Year-Olds in the U.S. Have Never Been Married," by Richard Fry (Pew Research Center, 2023).
• "Divorce Skyrocketing Among Aging Boomers," by Sharon Jayson (AARP, 2023).
• "Don’t Let Love Take Over Your Life," by Faith Hill (The Atlantic, 2023).
• "Marriage Provides Health Benefits – and Here’s Why," by Libby Richards, Melissa Franks, and Rosie Shrout (The Conversation, 2023).
• "The Benefits of Diversifying Your Social Portfolio," by Samantha Boardman (Psychology Today, 2023).
• "Satisfying Singlehood as a Function of Age and Cohort: Satisfaction With Being Single Increases With Age After Midlife," by Yoobin Park, Elizabeth Page-Gould, and Geoff MacDonald (Psychology and Aging, 2022).
• "Pathology in Relationships," by Susan C. South (Annual Review of Clinical Psychology, 2021).
• "Behind 'the Collateral Heartbreak' and Intense Devotion of the Reagans' Decades-Long Romance," by Virginia Chamlee (People, 2021).
• "U.S. Marriage Rate Plunges to Lowest Level on Record," by Janet Adamy (The Wall Street Journal, 2020).
• "The Suffocation Model: Why Marriage in America Is Becoming an All-or-Nothing Institution," by Eli J. Finkel, Elaine O. Cheung, Lydia F. Emery, Kathleen L. Carswell, and Grace M. Larson (Current Directions in Psychological Science, 2015).

EXTRAS:

• "Are We Getting Lonelier?" by No Stupid Questions (2023).
• "The Facts Are In: Two Parents Are Better Than One," by Freakonomics Radio (2023).
• “Why Did You Marry That Person? (Replay),” by Freakonomics Radio (2023).
• “The Fracking Boom, a Baby Boom, and the Retreat From Marriage,” by Freakonomics Radio (2017).

SOURCES:

• Eli Finkel, professor of psychology and of management and organizations at Northwestern University.
• Katie Genadek, economist at the U.S. Census Bureau and faculty research associate at the Institute for Behavioral Science at the University of Colorado, Boulder.
• Faith Hill, senior associate editor of culture at The Atlantic.
• Abraham Maslow, 20th-century psychologist.
• Katherine K. Merseth, senior lecturer at the Harvard Graduate School of Education.