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Start / Skönlitteratur / Not About Lumberjacks
Not About Lumberjacks
A monthly fiction podcast by Christopher Gronlund, a writer whose stories contain truths, but are mostly made up.
100 avsnitt • Längd: 25 min • Oregelbundet
Om podden
A monthly fiction podcast by Christopher Gronlund, a writer whose stories contain truths, but are mostly made up. Sometimes the stories are funny — other times they’re serious. Occasionally, the stories are odd. But you have Christopher’s word about one thing: he will never — EVER — share a story about lumberjacks.
The podcast Not About Lumberjacks is created by Christopher Gronlund. The podcast and the artwork on this page are embedded on this page using the public podcast feed (RSS).
Avsnitt
Enemy Wanted
22 februari 2025 |
49 min
Ferdinand Pérez gets more than he bargained for when he answers a flyer ad taped to a telephone pole looking for an enemy.
Content Advisory: “Enemy Wanted” deals with difficulty sleeping, a blurred sense of reality, crime, cartoonish violence, illness, a death, and wishing for an early end to life. That makes it sound dismal, but I assure you…it’s a blast of a story.
Also, it’s one with no swearing. Still, were it a movie, it would be rated PG (or maybe PG-13 for mature themes), so be aware. Also, because there are scenes with action, be prepared for the occasional surprising loud sound.
* * *
Before we get to the story, I want to talk about the music in this one. Clarke Jaxton Motorbike makes electronic music and writes badass stories on his YouTube channel. (You should go listen and read some…most are only a couple minutes long.)
We started chatting after I replied to some of his work. One day, he contacted me — saying he would love to do the score for a Not About Lumberjacks story. Originally, we thought his music would be perfect for “A Very Strange Day (On Our Neighboring Red Planet),” from this year’s Christmas episode, but Mr. Motorbike was in the middle of scoring a feature film.
So, instead, he gets the first Not About Lumberjacks story of the new calendar year!
* * *
Oh! One more quick thing: there’s mention of a soup review podcast in this story. Paul Csomo’s The Soup Review Podcast is a real thing, and you should check it out!
Onward!
* * *
Credits:
Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story – Clarke Jaxton Motorbike.
Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund.
Not About Lumberjacks Q&A 2
9 februari 2025 |
35 min
Four years ago, I did a Q&A for the Behind the Cut episode for “Geocached.”
No idea why I’ve not done another, but with this being the long time between episodes (after back-to-back stories last November and December), it seemed like a good time to do another.
I asked members of the Not About Lumberjacks Patreon for questions — as well as some questions from social media. These were the results:
- Are there any limitations that frustrate you about stories you would like to tell? Whether it’s your technical skills or the medium itself (obviously it’s audio, so you can’t use visual effects etc that sort of thing where you find yourself thinking “if only I could ___, I would be able to tell this story the way I want to”).
- Are there styles or types of stories you wish you were able to write?
- At what point did you realize you had found your voice/style, and how much of it stays solidly “you” as you go from serious to goofy stories.
- What’s the longest you sat on a story for Not About Lumberjacks?
- Any stories you refuse to abandon because there’s got to be some kind of conclusion to it somewhere, and the plot is too cool to walk away?
- Might be a bit personal, but is Not About Lumberjacks breaking even? Losing money, Because I never did a podcast, I don’t know the finances of having one.
- Did you know Dave Pettitt before reaching out to him about narrating? Did he know (or know of) you and Not About Lumberjacks?
- What is the favorite thing you’ve written that is the least liked by other people and why do you think that disconnect happened?
- Which story surprised you the most that became a fan favorite – why do you think it was so popular with your listeners?
- Between seminars, writing courses, writing groups, etc., what do you think has helped you improve the most as a writer?
- How do ideas for stories come to you? Do you randomly say something like, “I want to write about this kind of guy who lives in this kind of setting and has this unusual thing about him,” and then fill in? Or does some small thought catch you and you turn it into a story? Or what other ways?
Links to people and things mentioned in the Q&A:
Behind the Cut – Christmas Miscellany 8
21 december 2024 |
11 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks collection of stories, “Christmas Miscellany 8,” I talk about writing coincidences that make it seem like writers copy from other writers or current events…
As always, this commentary contains spoilers from the latest episode, so you might want to listen to that first.
Christmas Miscellany 8
8 december 2024 |
54 min
Ho Ho Ho! It’s that time once again…time for the annual Not About Lumberjacks Christmas episode. If you’re new, here, eight years ago I gathered up all my shorter short stories (like stocking stuffers) and released them for the holidays. Since then, the effort has grown, but no matter how random the tales are, the last one is always a Christmas story of some sort.
This year’s stories:
- “Crispas Echo” – We travel back to 1985 for a tale of summer school friendship and…Taco Bell!
- “A Very Strange Day (On Our Neighboring Red Planet)” – The first human mission to Mars runs into a very surprising discovery…
- “Dick is Dead” – Two accountants end up unlucky and are forced to attend the funeral of a weird coworker on behalf of their department.
- “Christmas Spirits” – Three famous Christmas ghosts have had enough, and set a pharmaceutical CEO straight.
Disclaimer About “Christmas Spirits”: This story was written well before this week’s murder of UnitedHealthcare’s CEO. I am in no way capitalizing on timely news. Unfortunately, when one writes enough, they are bound to run into releasing a story that carries more weight because of a real-life event. (Example: When Stranger Things released an episode showing murdered children the week of [yet another] U.S. school shooting and began with a disclaimer.) Spoiler Alert: The CEO in this story lives. But…the last story of this year’s Christmas episode is bound to still evoke emotions in some, so I wanted to mention all this up front.
And now, the usual content advisory…
Content Advisory: Spread throughout the four stories making up this year’s Christmas episode are teen drug use, violence (humorous in places, but a couple rough moments in “Christmas Spirits”), teasing, a funeral, corporate greed, and–of course–swearing!
No matter what you celebrate this season (or not), I wish you and yours all the best as we face down the end of another year.
* * *
Credits:
Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story – Various, all licensed through Epidemic Sound.
Stories and Narration: Christopher Gronlund.
Episode Transcript >> (Coming Soon)
Behind the Cut – The Legend of Mighty Missy Stewart
26 november 2024 |
10 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, “The Legend of Mighty Missy Stewart,” I talk about my love of tall tales and…dislike about asking for things…
As always, this commentary contains spoilers from the latest story, so you might want to listen to that first.
The Legend of Mighty Missy Stewart
11 november 2024 |
32 min
Join Mighty Missy Stewart and her badger buddy, Tamarack, as they come of age in a time of expanding frontiers and rugged lumberjacks!
Content Advisory: Were “The Legend of Mighty Missy Stewart” a movie, it would be rated PG. There’s some good-natured teasing and a non-descriptive death. What might put it into the PG realm instead of General Audiences is the mention of some woodland monsters. But this one’s a really light-hearted and fun tale.
* * *
Audio stories are best with the perfect narrator, and “The Legend of Mighty Missy Stewart” is brought to life in the best of ways by the equally mighty Dave Pettitt.
Dave’s done a wide range of commercial work, including the National Hockey League and the National Football League. Cartoons and video games? Yep, Dave’s done both. But he’s best known for the unscripted reality series, Discovery’s Highway Thru Hell—and somewhere near the other end of the spectrum – GPS audio tours for an app called Guide Along.
You can learn more about Dave and what he’s up to at the links below…
* * *
Credits:
Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story – Sandra Marteleur, Horna Spelmän, and uncredited traditional tracks, all licensed through Epidemic Sound.
Story: Christopher Gronlund.
Narration: Dave Pettitt.
Behind the Cut – Overwinter
8 september 2024 |
12 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, “Overwinter,” I talk about why I wrote a very quiet story for introverts.
As always, this commentary contains spoilers from the latest story, so you might want to listen to that first.
Links to things mentioned in this commentary:
Overwinter
24 augusti 2024 |
62 min
In this celebration of solitude, Daniel’s life is changed forever after spending 5 months alone on an island 13 miles off the Maine coast.
Content Advisory: “Overwinter” deals with a job change, longing, solitude vs. loneliness, and does contain a couple words you’ve probably heard on TV or at work this week. There are also a couple scenes with moderate consumption of alcohol.
* * *
Credits:
Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story – Anders Schill Paulsen, licensed through Epidemic Sound.
Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund.
Behind the Cut – Mudlarking
23 juni 2024 |
11 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, “Mudlarking,” I talk about a recent urge to keep telling more “serious” stories…and why I chose to write something a bit more adventurous [even ridiculous] instead.
As always, this commentary contains spoilers from the latest story, so you might want to listen to that first.
Mudlarking
7 juni 2024 |
min
When Eva Barrett decides to give mudlarking on the Thames River foreshore a go, she finds something very strange during low tide.
Content Advisory: “Mudlarking” is pretty tame. There’s some violence in the form of fighting, and even then: it’s not brutal “people-are-dying fighting” — more like light action movie fighting. And when it comes to swearing, it’s pretty non-existent (you’re likely to hear worse on television). The worst it gets is an “S” word instead of “poop.”
If you’re driving, there is one collision with a vehicle. Not a screeching tires kind of crash, just a sudden THUD!
* * *
Credits:
Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story – Hampus Naeselius, licensed through Epidemic Sound.
Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund.
Photo Credit: Susan Green.
Behind the Cut – It’s Never Too Late
1 april 2024 |
13 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, “It’s Never Too Late,” I talk about the mechanics of time-travel stories and how “fixing” the past may not be as great an idea as it may seem. As always, this commentary contains spoilers from the latest story, so you might want to listen […]
It’s Never Too Late
21 mars 2024 |
73 min
When Stanley Gladstone takes his time machine for a test run, he gets more than he bargained for when it breaks down, leaving him stranded in 1983. Content Advisory: “It’s Never Too Late” deals with regret, death (including a decayed body), personal loss, and the sound of someone vomiting. Also, if you’re driving, be aware […]
Behind the Cut – Christmas Miscellany 7
17 december 2023 |
11 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I talk about why I do an annual Christmas episode [even though I’m a life-long atheist] and the importance of committing to a bit. * * * Also, don’t forget that I’m doing a Not About Lumberjacks t-shirt giveaway in honor of November’s 50th […]
Christmas Miscellany 7
10 december 2023 |
59 min
This year’s Christmas episode consists of three stories — one of them a Christmas tale. Content Advisory: “The World Beneath Her Brush” and “The King of French Fries” barely merit content advisories. At most, they are about personal struggle in the hope of having a better life. “Suburban Home” deals with pettiness, arguing, the effects […]
Behind the Cut – Old Growth
22 november 2023 |
10 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I talk about what it was like to write my first story in second-person point of view. * * * Also, don’t forget that I’m doing a Not About Lumberjacks t-shirt giveaway in honor of November’s 50th full story episode. All you have to […]
Old Growth
9 november 2023 |
33 min
You are a lumberjack alone on the side of a mountain with whomever—or whatever—killed your fellow loggers. (Yep! This one’s in second person…) Content Advisory: “Old Growth” deals with death, gore, anguish, being lost in a forest, being alone in the dark, and…creatures. But hey, at least there’s no swearing! There’s really only one rather […]
Behind the Cut – Lakeview Estates
7 oktober 2023 |
13 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I talk about little Easter Eggs in the story…as well as the time-honored tradition of writers sneaking references into their tales. Listen, and you’ll hear a few inside things about past Not About Lumberjacks stories as well. Episode Transcript >>
Lakeview Estates
26 september 2023 |
75 min
The residents of Lakeview Estates Mobile Home Community battle the city and developers in an attempt to save their homes from demolition to make way for a golf course. Content Advisory: “Lakeview Estates” deals with loss of homes, corruption, mention of drug and alcohol addiction (including teen marijuana use), death, arson, violence, incarceration, and infidelity. […]
Behind the Cut – Firing the Muse
29 juli 2023 |
16 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I talk about the things I wanted to be when I grew up (before deciding the become a writer). I share stories about writing rejection, the friend who convinced me to begin recording and releasing fiction, and how a different friend’s prediction about “The […]
Firing the Muse
16 juli 2023 |
36 min
When Warren Quinn trades his existing workaday muse for a more literary muse, he gets much more than he bargained for. Content Advisory: “Firing the Muse” deals with stresses and job loss around creative work. There’s casual alcohol consumption and smoking—and a very brief allusion to combat PTSD. Unless you consider “dammit” swearing, this is […]
Behind the Cut – The Song of the Stone
3 juni 2023 |
14 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I talk about the audiences I imagine when I write — and how the struggle to live a life true to oneself is not a new concept. Episode Transcript >>
The Song of the Stone
23 maj 2023 |
60 min
Zander Pierson’s dissatisfaction with living the life others expected from him leads to a stone in a Swedish forest that also called to Einvaldr Brúnn at a turning point in his life in the early 860s. Content Advisory: “The Song of the Stone” deals with lack of job and life satisfaction, pressure to marry and […]
Behind the Cut – Rockbiters
19 mars 2023 |
13 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I talk about how I’m normally not the biggest fan of worldbuilding in fiction, but recognize when it’s necessary. (And not just because “Rockbiters” required some up-front worldbuilding!) Episode Transcript >>
Rockbiters
9 mars 2023 |
58 min
Find out what happens when the Forgefire brothers, while mining in an asteroid belt called The Delve, discover something that changes the lives of an entire solar system. (Yep, it’s Dwarves in Space!!!) Content Advisory: “Rockbiters” deals with loss of life, brief mention of enslavement, and war. Some may find the battle scenes loud and […]
Behind the Cut – Christmas Miscellany 6
31 december 2022 |
16 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I talk about new years and my motivations to acknowledge several specific dates in each calendar year. Episode Transcript >>
Christmas Miscellany 6
22 december 2022 |
42 min
This year’s Christmas episode consists of four stories wrapped inside a bigger story. Content Advisory: “When Anders Came Home for Christmas” deals with family drama, cartoon violence, crude humor, monsters, loss of loved ones, and alcohol consumption. Unless you consider “asshole” swearing, this is the third story in a row without rougher language. I’m sure […]
Behind the Cut – Tin-Hearted Man
10 december 2022 |
11 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I talk about why almost half of all tales, here, feature violence to some degree… Episode Transcript >>
Tin-Hearted Man
23 november 2022 |
35 min
When Big Nick Champeau is taken by the Thunder River, his lumber camp speculates what his life might have been like before becoming a lumberjack. Content Advisory: “Tin-Hearted Man” deals with loss of life, child abuse, alcoholism, physical fighting/violence against others, Korean War combat, facial disfigurement, lost love, loss of a pet, and drug use. […]
Behind the Cut – In the Margins
9 oktober 2022 |
12 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I answer a listener question about the narrators I choose to sometimes work with. After that, I talk about how I have never been much of a fan of puzzles and riddles, but why I chose to write a short story featuring both. Episode […]
In the Margins
24 september 2022 |
35 min
When Kenna Baynes discovers a strange book in her college library, she finds something in the margins that changes her life forever… Content Advisory: “In the Margins” almost doesn’t merit a content advisory. There are a couple moments of light suspense and mention of college debt. There’s no swearing, but the tale does allude to […]
Behind the Cut – Godspeed, Crazy Mike
7 augusti 2022 |
10 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I get personal and talk about why a character in “Godspeed, Crazy Mike” has Tourette syndrome…and how I approach writing about people with disorders and disabilities… Episode Transcript >>
Godspeed, Crazy Mike
16 juli 2022 |
82 min
Crazy Mike is dead behind the maintenance barn and the quaking bog man is missing. It’s up to detectives Gary Vandiver and Beatrice Mule to figure out what happened in this mystery set in a bog in northern Illinois. Content Advisory: “Godspeed, Crazy Mike” deals with murder, speculation of suicide, divorce (including a custody battle), […]
Behind the Cut – Gerald’s Grail
11 juni 2022 |
9 min
At 10,308 words, “Gerald’s Grail” is the longest Not About Lumberjacks story to date! (And will likely hold the record, ’cause DANG…that was quite a thing to edit!) I’ll let you in on a little secret: “Gerald’s Grail” could easily be a novel. (And trust me, I’ve given it some thought.) But…it’s not the only […]
Gerald’s Grail
30 maj 2022 |
84 min
While knocking around an antique shop with his grandmother, a teenage geek finds something that changes his life in a most curious way… Content Advisory: Bullying, violence (including passing mention of the Cambodian genocide of the 70s), teen tobacco and alcohol use, and — of course — swearing. And if you’re so inclined, be sure […]
Behind the Cut – Revisions
19 mars 2022 |
14 min
It’s not uncommon for people to assume stories are a reflection of the author — especially stories in which an author features a writer as a protagonist. “Revisions” is about a writer who was raised by a single mother. Some people who know me mentioned they felt it was heavily influenced by my mother. I […]
Revisions
5 mars 2022 |
38 min
An author tries to finish construction on her recently-deceased mother’s home while writing her second novel — the follow up to a New York Times Best Seller. Content Advisory: Death of a parent and struggles with self doubt. (For once, no swearing!) And if you’re so inclined to pitch in and help the farm animal […]
Behind the Cut – Christmas Miscellany 5
31 december 2021 |
11 min
It was a strange year, but also a productive year for Not About Lumberjacks. As we close out 2021, some thoughts on the year that was…and some hopes for the year ahead… Episode Transcript >>
Christmas Miscellany 5
23 december 2021 |
35 min
Four stories, most of which take place during the holiday season… “Stories of Fine Taste”: The stories behind two recipes (“Grandma’s Olive Loaf” – Something wicked is back in Kirkland’s Holler) and (“Fred’s English Muffin Garbage Pizzas” – A young boy finds out what’s behind a mysterious door). “Reply All”: Cheryl’s not standing for office […]
Behind the Cut – In Cypress Slough
13 december 2021 |
18 min
“In Cypress Slough” includes two gay characters, but it’s not a story about being gay in East Texas. In this behind-the-scenes look at the latest Not About Lumberjacks story, I talk about representation, the stories I’d never write (and why), and how I approach writing disenfranchised characters who have experienced lives I can only imagine. […]
In Cypress Slough
24 november 2021 |
53 min
Two deadhead loggers find something remarkable in the Piney Woods of East Texas, putting them at odds with a large timber company. Content Advisory: In Cypress Slough deals with bullying, violence (including gun violence), homophobia, the destruction of wildlife and habitat, structure fires, mention of suicide, and swearing. Also, if you’re driving: be aware there’s […]
Behind the Cut – Milkboy
16 oktober 2021 |
18 min
While “Milkboy” is based on a true story, it definitely ends up a work of fiction. When I started the story, I had no idea where to take it. Discovering what to do with the story led to a ridiculous and heartfelt tale of friendship that is one of my favorite stories on the site. […]
Milkboy
2 oktober 2021 |
55 min
Milkboy is based on a true story… When two friends use a bulletin board system to create an online persona to tease their best friend, they get more than they have coming to them for their deception. Content Advisory: Milkboy deals with emotional manipulation, stressful working conditions, infected food, passing mention of a grizzly death, […]
Behind the Cut – Calling Out of Time
12 augusti 2021 |
8 min
“Calling Out of Time” started with a tweet. Without a random thing I saw on Twitter, it’s unlikely this story would exist. Ideas are everywhere if you’re open to them, but it’s not as easy as picking them out of the air — it helps to know which ideas are worth working through vs. those […]
Calling Out of Time
2 augusti 2021 |
34 min
What would you do if you could call back in time and leave a message to your younger self? When Amir discovers a phone booth that seems to magically appear on the corner in his neighborhood, he does everything he can to change the worst thing that ever happened to him and his family… Also, […]
Behind the Cut – A Deathly Mistake
9 juli 2021 |
17 min
“A Deathly Mistake” ended up becoming one of my favorite episodes of Not About Lumberjacks. In this behind-the-scenes look, I discuss how it was a bit of a departure from other stories I’ve written for the show. I also talk about fears faced in recording “A Deathly Mistake”…and close with a request to everyone who […]
A Deathly Mistake
23 juni 2021 |
55 min
When Death mistakenly harvests the soul of the wrong John Smith, John’s life–and After Life–are forever changed. Also, I mentioned that I’d leave a link to Jennifer Moss’s mighty novel, Town Red. Here it is! * * * Credits: Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story/Bloopers – Jerry Lacey (Story) and Timothy Lewis (Bloopers), licensed from […]
An Update
18 maj 2021 |
5 min
In this long overdue update, I talk about the next Not About Lumberjacks story, a change in the way I look at commercial intent with writing, and mulling over Patreon options… Episode Transcript >>
New Year’s Eve 2020
1 januari 2021 |
12 min
At 6:45 on this New Year’s Eve, I thought, “Well, Cynthia has shuffled off to bed, and I want to stay up a little longer, so…I should go sit down in front of the microphone and record some thoughts with no idea about what to say…” (Yes, we go to bed early…even on New Year’s […]
Behind the Cut – Christmas Miscellany 4
29 december 2020 |
9 min
This year’s annual Christmas episode was anchored by a story based on real life. But what is “real life” when it comes to stories — even those claiming to be true? I discuss how fiction and truth have a way of coming together to create even greater truths in the process of their mingling. Also, […]
Christmas Miscellany 4
15 december 2020 |
34 min
For the fourth year in a row, it’s a handful of stories (five, in fact) to make your holidays merry and bright! This year’s lineup: Tracks – A tale of drifting teenage friendship. Homecoming – Callan returns home for his annual visit with his father. The Last Wish – If a genie grants you three […]
Behind the Cut – Geocached
29 november 2020 |
27 min
In honor of five years of Not About Lumberjacks, this behind-the-scenes look is not the usual commentary about the latest episode. If you want to know how “Geocached” came to be, here’s the quick version: My wife and I love hiking, but we’ve never gotten into geocaching. Still, it’s never lost on me the things […]
Geocached
12 november 2020 |
19 min
When Wayne finds strange items in geocaches along the old lumber roads of northern Minnesota, he becomes obsessed with discovering who’s leaving the items behind. What he finds changes his life forever… * * * Credits: Music: Theme – Ergo Phizmiz. Story – Headlund, licensed from Epidemic Sound. Photo: Cache Mania. Story: Christopher Gronlund. Narration: […]
Behind the Cut – The Cold of Summer
3 november 2020 |
8 min
Until the last minute, I didn’t like the latest story for Not About Lumberjacks. In this behind-the-scenes look at the episode, I discuss what was wrong, how I fixed things, and what I realized along the way… Episode Transcript >>
The Cold of Summer
21 oktober 2020 |
33 min
Four strangers come together when they contract a mysterious illness from an old woman in line at a pharmacy. Content Advisory: This story deals with illness, including mentions of COVID-19. It’s also not without moments of anxiety, regret, abandonment, nightmares, and even death. I know that makes it sound like it’s a rough tale, but […]
Behind the Cut – Pepper
25 juli 2020 |
9 min
My good friend, Curtis Hart, requested this episode. He wanted to know why sometimes I tease an episode…only to release it much later — sometimes even releasing multiple episodes before it. He gets his answer in this behind-the-scenes look at what goes into an episode of Not About Lumberjacks. Episode Transcript >>
Pepper
3 juli 2020 |
41 min
A father returns as a reincarnated, talking dog in an attempt to make amends with his estranged son. Content Advisory: Language, some [gloriously] crude humor, and discussions about the death of a family member from cancer. Yeah, Pepper dies, so it’s technically a dead-dog story…but it’s the protagonist’s dad. * * * Credits: Music: Theme […]
Behind the Cut – Under the Big Top
10 juni 2020 |
10 min
In this behind-the-scenes look at “Under the Big Top,” I talk about what I like (and dislike) about mysteries — and why I tend to not write them… Episode Transcript >>
Under the Big Top
12 maj 2020 |
62 min
An FBI agent nearing forced retirement races to solve the case that’s haunted him for years. Will he find the break he needs at a traveling circus? Content Advisory: Swearing, mention of child abduction, mention of sexual assault, mention of child murders, eating disorders, and violence (fighting and a shooting). Cannibalism. * * * Credits: […]
Behind the Cut – Christmas Miscellany III
3 januari 2020 |
8 min
A bit about how the annual Christmas episode came to be…and what is in store for Not About Lumberjacks in the year ahead… * * * Episode Transcript >>
Christmas Miscellany III
21 december 2019 |
26 min
For the third year in a row, it’s a handful of stories — instead of just one — all to make your holidays merry and bright! This year’s lineup: My Grandmother Wrestled Bears – A drifter returns home to her grandmother’s house for the holidays. The Beast in the Back – The truth behind the […]
Behind the Cut – The Lumberjack of Williamsburg
15 december 2019 |
10 min
The latest episode of Not About Lumberjacks is a fictional podcast that takes a turn from typical to serious. I talk about entrepreneurial podcasts in general, and then specifically discuss the inspiration behind Brooke’s story when her interview with the Lumberjack of Williamsburg falls apart… Content Advisory: Poverty and Eating Disorders. And I think I […]
The Lumberjack of Williamsburg
8 december 2019 |
28 min
An entrepreneurial podcast takes a turn for the worst…and then just keeps going… Content Advisory: Swearing, poverty, eating disorders, and arguing.Oh, and smarmy entrepreneurial podcast tropes…ugh! * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and April Moon. Story: Christopher Gronlund. Voice Actors: Cynthia Griffith and Christopher Gronlund. Episode Transcript >>
Been Sick
1 december 2019 |
2 min
A two and a half minute update about the November anniversary episode. Short version: I’ve been sick… Transcript >>
Behind the Cut – Booger
17 november 2019 |
8 min
I will freely admit that I indulged my inner twelve-year-old with the sound design for “Booger.” In this look behind the story, I discuss its inspiration and…its rather vile sounds… Episode Transcript >>
Booger
2 november 2019 |
28 min
A kid makes a monster in his bathtub for a very specific reason… (What could go wrong?) Content Advisory: Swearing, bullying. Mention of masturbation. A father who cheats on his wife. Overbearing mother. Violence: young boys fighting. Gross sound effects. (Seriously, I received more feedback about “Booger” than any other story…all about how disgusting the […]
Behind the Cut – Alone in HQ
26 augusti 2019 |
13 min
“Alone in HQ” is a satire, but maybe just barely. Some thoughts about the illness permeating many corporations and those working for them…and the effect that had on this story. (Also, a bit about Ayn Rand and the framing device of Anthem as it pertains to “Alone in HQ.”) Episode Transcript >>
Alone in HQ
9 augusti 2019 |
33 min
Femurs were wielded, and CEOs fell… After the apocalypse, a lowly office worker is alive and alone in headquarters…keeping an old way of life going in the hope that things will one day return to normal… Content Advisory: Death of a rabbit from blunt-force trauma. Violence (mention of a CEO bludgeoning someone with a cow […]
Behind the Cut – Taller than the Moon
13 juli 2019 |
6 min
“Taller than the Moon” is the first serious short story I ever wrote. It is roughly thirty years old. Some thoughts about those early writing days — and literary fiction in general. Episode Transcript >>
Taller Than The Moon
15 juni 2019 |
12 min
A trip home to visit his parents brings with it a flood of memories for Michael Stokowski. [Random side notes: I believe this is the first true short story I ever wrote. Also, it is the only story I can think of inspired by one of my dreams…] Content Advisory: A family deals with the […]
Behind the Cut – Christmas Cuts
21 januari 2019 |
7 min
Most stories you’ve listened to, here, are polished first drafts. Especially where short stories are concerned, I do not subscribe to the notion that the first draft of everything is shit. Some thoughts about that, and how it worked with the recent Christmas episode. * * * Episode Transcript >>
Christmas Cuts – Three Stories
23 december 2018 |
29 min
Last year’s holiday-ish 7-Stories episode, featuring a handful of micro-fiction, was well received. So this year, it’s another handful of stories: “The Crock,” narrated by Cynthia Griffith. A woman’s battles with her mother-in-law take an unexpected turn. “Greetings,” narrated by Patrick K. Walsh. An out-of-work special effects makeup artist gets a job as a big-box […]
Behind the Cut – Waking the Lumberjack
17 december 2018 |
21 min
Waking the Lumberjack is the first one-shot audiodrama I’ve done with multiple voice actors for Not About Lumberjacks. Anchoring the story is Tim Czarnecki, starring as the Narrator. I sat down with Tim and chatted about what it was like narrating this story… * * * Episode Transcript >>
Waking the Lumberjack
23 november 2018 |
24 min
In honor of another year of Not About Lumberjacks, it’s a wrasslin’ story I swear has nothing to do with lumberjacks! The funeral service of “Big Papa” Howe, the Ontario Lumberjack, does not go as planned. It’s up to his two sons, Big Mike and Little Mike, to put an old rivalry to rest. Content […]
A Random Update
13 oktober 2018 |
5 min
Howdy, howdy, howdy. Christopher here with a random update. This is mostly being recorded and released in support of this episode of the ScreamQueenz Podcast. ScreamQueenz is a fun look at cheesy horror films, but in October it gets a bit more serious. Not the show, because the show is always light-hearted fun! But in […]
Behind the Cut – Dear God (Ep. 022)
12 augusti 2018 |
5 min
“Dear God” is not the first story I wrote featuring gods; in fact, it’s not the first story I’ve written for Not About Lumberjacks featuring gods. Gods are strange things to me. I’m a life-long atheist, but I love the storytelling opportunities gods of all kinds offer. Also, I might just talk about how the […]
Dear God
25 juli 2018 |
15 min
A panhandler is given a magical postage stamp. Content Advisory: Swearing. Scam artists. Mention of parental death. Homelessness. Misogyny. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund Episode Transcript >>
Behind the Cut – A Race to the End (Ep. 021)
29 april 2018 |
5 min
If one desires, they can have a story end in so many different ways. Some stories just have a feel from the start for a certain kind of ending, but others are shaped by a writer’s environment — sometimes even being affected by other stories written around the time a particular story is done. That’s […]
The Race to the End
14 april 2018 |
21 min
The 100-year-old son of the oldest man to ever live plots to kill a 123-year-old man about to break his father’s record. Content Advisory: Swearing and cartoonish violence. Stress of aging and mortality. A son trying to live up to his father’s expectations. Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund
Behind the Cut – Episode 20: 7 Stories
7 februari 2018 |
8 min
The last episode was a bit of a departure, with seven bits of micro-fiction. The most fascinating thing was hearing which stories people loved most (“Vlad Stovepipe” won). So…for this episode of Behind the Cut, a bit about each of the stories…
7 Stories
23 december 2017 |
22 min
A bit of a departure this holiday season: seven stories instead of one! (Think of it as micro-fiction stocking stuffers.) “Not About Lumberjacks” – As it says in the name, this story is not about lumberjacks! “Be a Man” – Sometimes kids grow up faster than they should. “Fucking Asshole” – It’s a story about […]
Behind the Cut – Episode 19: The Hidebehind
11 december 2017 |
43 min
Something a little different this time… Because “The Hidebehind” was the first episode of Not About Lumberjacks with a male narrator other than me, I chat with Defender Radio’s Michael Howie about what it was like to work together on the story’s production. It’s a glorious tale of friendship, creativity…and majestic beards! (Also, you should […]
The Hidebehind
15 november 2017 |
15 min
Something lurks in the woods outside a lumber camp in this story I SWEAR is NOT about lumberjacks… Content Advisory: Swearing. Violence (involving fights and knives). Alcohol use. Mass poisoning. Horror (monster in the woods). Dementia brought on by environmental factors. Implied cannibalism. * * * Credits: Story: Christopher Gronlund Narration: Michael Howie, of the […]
Behind the Cut – Episode 18: Memorial Park
12 november 2017 |
9 min
There really is a Memorial Park where after-school fights took place when I was in junior high school. And I was involved in one myself; in fact, some reality creeped into “Memorial Park.” If you’re interested in what’s real and not in the story, look no further than this…
Memorial Park
27 oktober 2017 |
25 min
An after-school fight pits the meanest kid in Walt Whitman Junior High School against one of its shyest geeks. Content Advisory: Swearing. Bullying. Violence (bullying and an after-school fight). Humiliation. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund
Behind the Cut – Episode 17: Cubicle Punks
10 september 2017 |
4 min
I was never the punk that Bobby McGarvey or Stevie Saturn were in “Cubicle Punks,” but I do have something in common with them: I have always struggled with certain things that come with a “responsible” job. The pull between a day job that pays the bills and pursuing one’s dreams is a recurring theme […]
Cubicle Punks
20 augusti 2017 |
39 min
Two aging punks come to grips with who they once were…and what they’ve become today. Content Advisory: Swearing. Drug and alcohol use. A small fight. Mention of violence (a large, back-alley fight). Midlife crisis. Dissatisfaction with work and life. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Punk Rock Opera Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund
A Temporary Change in Schedule
6 mars 2017 |
1 min
As I close in on having a readable draft of the current novel-in-progress, I’m changing the schedule for Not about Lumberjacks until I am done with the book. Until I’m ready to return to a monthly schedule, stories will be released every-other month. I hope you understand…
Behind the Cut – Episode 16: Bobo
19 februari 2017 |
6 min
All but three little things are true in “Bobo.” Find out what those things are, why I quit clowning, and…how I measure success today.
Bobo
22 januari 2017 |
14 min
A kid’s party clown comes to grips with what he’s become. Content Advisory: Swearing. Mention of alcohol use. Bullying. Mention of attending a strip club. Childhood trauma brought on by a clown. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund The “Fuck You, Clown!” Drive-By Duo: Zane and […]
Behind the Cut – Episode 15: El Concusso
9 januari 2017 |
6 min
“El Concusso” is one of the few things I’ve written directly for somebody. Here’s the story behind the story…
El Concusso
18 december 2016 |
12 min
A professional wrestler can’t remember who he is after hitting his head against the ringpost during a match in Mexico City. Content Advisory: Cartoonish violence (professional wrestling) and a car accident resulting in hospitalization. * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund
Behind the Cut – Episode 14: The Art of the Lumberjack
4 december 2016 |
4 min
A real book inspired “The Art of the Lumberjack.” That book? The Sport of Falconry. According to the inscription, the book was given to me by my father on January 11, 1975. This four-and-a-half minute episode is about how a book I’ve had for 41 years led to one of the best short stories I’ve […]
The Art of the Lumberjack
19 november 2016 |
31 min
A year ago, I posted the first Not about Lumberjacks story. In honor of the show’s anniversary, I keep with tradition and refuse to even mention those foul-mouthed tree droppers! When Erik Nilsson has a minor heart attack and is told to take some forced time off of work to recuperate, he finally reads a […]
Behind the Cut – Episode 13: Strange Audio
7 november 2016 |
48 min
This time, I sit down and chat with Cynthia Griffith about recording an audio drama instead of a narrated work of prose. It’s the longest episode of Behind the Cut, but it gives a good peek at the process behind putting an audio drama together. And remember, in a few weeks it’s the next Not […]
Strange Audio
23 oktober 2016 |
16 min
In honor of Halloween: a podcaster discovers some ghostly audio while editing an episode of his show… Content Advisory: Swearing, crude humor, spouses arguing, an old ghost created by violent means (violence against a woman). * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story: Christopher Gronlund Narration: Christopher Gronlund and Cynthia Griffith (Wife […]
Behind the Cut – Episode 12: Purvis
8 oktober 2016 |
9 min
If you listened to “Purvis,” it’s probably clear that I spent a lot of time when I was younger playing Dungeons and Dragons and being picked on. If you’ve not listened to “Purvis,” I suggest you listen to the story first because there are some big spoilers in this behind-the-scenes look at the story. But […]
Purvis
22 september 2016 |
37 min
In 1984, a Dungeon Master struggles with keeping the few friendships he has together, all while dealing with a vicious bully. When Dungeons and Dragons is your only reprieve from the cruelties of life, the game becomes much more than recreation: it becomes a place of salvation. Content Advisory: This story is rough. It contains […]
Behind the Cut – Episode 11: Shadow Dancers
11 september 2016 |
6 min
As far as I can remember, “Shadow Dancers” was the first story I wrote around the time I was 20 and decided to make writing a serious pursuit. I talk about those early days of writing and how this is one of the few stories my father read before he died. He wasn’t keen on […]
Shadow Dancers
27 augusti 2016 |
12 min
Find out what happens when four boys figure out how to separate their shadows from their bodies… [All Ages] Content Advisory: I suppose some people might not be down with kids doing magic… * * * Credits: Music: Ergo Phizmiz and Chad Crouch Story and Narration: Christopher Gronlund
Behind the Cut – Episode 10: Fly Me to the Moon
14 augusti 2016 |
4 min
Fly Me to the Moon came about in an old writing group. Find out how three basic elements led to the story…and how different it was from other stories composed of the same pieces. (Also, find out how Mad Man Morgan got his name…)
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En liten tjänst av I'm With Friends. Finns även på engelska.