14. Talking About the Hard Stuff

In this episode, Jamie would like you to step out of your comfort zone for a minute or two and really think about how you talk to your kids about Big Serious Things: private parts, reproduction, consent, and even death. Discussing these things openly in your household creates a culture without secrecy, weirdness or shame. This means that when your child stumbles across these topics in the big wide world without you—as scary a thought as that may be—they’ll be mature, prepared, and a role model for their peers.   In this episode, Jamie impresses the importance of teaching your children the correct language for their bodies as well as the slang, suggests constructive ways you can discuss death with them, and gives her personal stories from in the trenches.  The Finer Details of This Episode:   Jamie discusses the surprisingly mature teenagers she met when helping a momma goat deliver her kids. Why it’s a bad idea to discuss sex and the human body through a lens of shame. Use the real term for each body part—private or otherwise—to make sure your child doesn’t feel alienated from them. When it’s okay and even preferred for your little one to use nicknames for body parts. Would you rather not have grown men be grossed out by women’s periods? Then start teaching your boys about them at a young age. How Jamie turned a funny remark by her son at the pool into a learning experience. Why “the talk” isn’t as effective or healthy as meting out reproductive education in bits and pieces over time. Don’t make the mistake of falling into the “My kid would NEVER” trap. Kids are going to approach the subject of death with curiosity rather than fear, so use death as an opportunity to educate rather than scare them. Quotes:   “You’ve never met a better bunch of kids than 4H kids.”   “I have a 13-year-old boy who knows more about reproductive organs than most grown men, and I have to say I think that kinda rocks.”   “Anytime your child is gonna say a word that gets a reaction from other people they’re gonna latch on very quickly to the power of the word.”   “Most women bleed. No, I’m not hurt. This is natural for women.”   “The kids as they get older need help with the emotional landscape, not the mechanics.”   “We want to create a culture of normalizing all of this stuff so that we don’t have a culture of secrecy and shame.” Links:   Sesame Street: Mr. Hooper’s death - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4CKuSRYrcQ   Jamie’s homepage - http://www.jamieglowacki.com/     Oh Crap! Potty Training - https://www.amazon.com/Crap-Potty-Training-Everything-Parenting-ebook/dp/B00V3L8YSU   Oh Crap! I Have A Toddler [Get my new book] -  https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Oh-Crap!-I-Have-a-Toddler/Jamie-Glowacki/Oh-Crap-Parenting/9781982109738 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices