Start / Oh Crap Parenting with Jamie Glowacki / 46 sleep expert dana obleman

46. Sleep Expert Dana Obleman

47 min • 23 mars 2022

On today’s episode, I’m delighted to welcome sleep expert Dana Obleman. Dana is the founder of the acclaimed Sleep Sense Program, and she lives for helping parents get their babies to sleep through the night. We begin with our own stories of sleepless nights with new babies, and how this struggle prompted Dana to find a solution that she then felt compelled to share with other exhausted parents. Her program offers a number of different options to help sleep train your baby, but Dana explains no matter which way you choose to get there, the heart of the issue is always going to be teaching your baby independent sleep skills.

Dana breaks down how to help your child have a positive relationship with sleep, the importance of being consistent when your toddler pushes limits around bedtime, and how to build a simple, calm “sleep sanctuary” for your kid and yourself. She also talks about avoiding overstimulation, working with biological cues like light and temperature to encourage sleep, and dispels the myth of the night owl in children. We discuss the ideal number of nighttime sleep hours for your little ones, how circadian rhythms shift in the teen years, and bond over our shared belief that sleep is one of the best nutrients we can give ourselves and our children.

The Finer Details of This Episode:

The heart of the issue is that you have to teach baby independent sleep skills, but there are different ways to get there
As human beings, we are very protective of and habitual with our sleep habits - this is why we don’t sleep as well at a hotel or at a friend’s house
As we return to school or daycare following the pandemic, you need to slowly back up bedtime to get them ready for this, rather than waiting until the night before
If you throw all rules and boundaries out the window, it can actually make your child feel insecure and you could see worse behavior show up as a result
Boundaries and routines make your kid feel secure, especially when they’re really young
If you let yourself become exhausted and sleep-deprived, you’re going to be stressed out and reactive toward your child
Sleep is a nutrient - we have to sleep well ourselves
A lot of behavioral issues are actually related to sleep deprivation
Making sure your child gets the right nutrition is more important than the ritual of a family meal together
Dana always stresses quality over quantity
Teach your child to have a good relationship with sleep - it is not a punishment, it’s not the enemy
If your kid figures out that something is a non-negotiable, they will be much less resistant to fighting it
A common place for toddlers to push boundaries is bedtime
If you shelter your child from feeling any “negative” emotions or getting upset, they will struggle with how to regulate themselves as adults
Most kids are early birds, not night owls - bedtime should match with this biological clock
If you let your child stay up past the point when they naturally feel tired, then cortisol kicks in to push them through and keep them awake, and they start getting hyper or cranky
We wake more often through the night when we’re overtired, and we wake up earlier in the morning