Parenting Beyond Discipline

We wish we could help our children make better decisions, or even make them for them sometimes! Where do we have control in parenting and where don't we? How can influence our children's decisions in areas where we don't have the control over those decisions? Tune in to find out!

At some point, our children will encounter adult authority figures whose way of teaching, guiding, and interacting is more harmful than helpful, How do we know when the way that someone regularly interacts with our child is potentially harmful to their self-esteem, mindset, and/or mental well-being? When is it just constructive criticism and guidance versus language that is potentially detrimental? In this episode, I cover 3 main guidelines to know when it's a good idea to step in and either limit or eliminate interactions between an authority figure and your child.

It seems like another approach to parenting gets introduced every year! How can we keep them all straight? How do we know which one/ones or mix is best for our family? The approach of conscious parenting has been around for almost 15 years but has grown in popularity over that time. What is it exactly? Is it different from any of the other approaches? In this episode, I cover the basic ideals behind conscious parenting, the positive attributes this perspective can bring to your family, and some pitfalls to be aware.

A disrespectful exchange from your child can often spiral to a battle of wills and a cycle of setting a respectful boundary vs. even bigger attitude from the youngster! How do break this? In this episode, I cover 5 simple strategies you can use to break this cycle of disrespect.

Competition is a part of everyday life, whether we like it or not. How do we foster a healthy sense of competition, help our kids see and understand where they excel and don't, and how to have a healthy approach and attitude towards self-improvement no matter where they fall? This episode covers all of this and the natural development of competition by age.

Life is messy. As we deal with life, our minds are often messy too. How do we teach our children the tools to deal with the messiness of life? Dr. Caroline Leaf explains why just helping kids learn to connect with feelings isn't enough and introduces us to the 5 steps we can use and teach our kids when life presents us with difficult situations.

Dr. Caroline Leaf is a communication pathologist, audiologist, and clinical and cognitive neuroscientist specializing in psychneurobiology and metacognitive neuropsychology. Her passion is to help people see the power of the mind to change the brain, control chaotic thinking, and find mental peace. Since the early 1980s, Dr. Leaf has researched the mind-brain connection, the nature of mental health, and the formation of memory. As a highly sought-after expert on mental health, she is the host of the top-rated podcast, Cleaning Up the Mental Mess. Dr. Leaf is also the author of several bestselling books, including Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess, How to Help Your Child Clean Up Their Mental Mess among others.

Whether your kids are starting school for the first time or going back to school after a summer break, get tips for success in this episode. The transition to starting school or starting back after a break can present challenges, from separation anxiety (yes even in kids past preschool!) To other adjustment difficulties. This episode is chock full of tips on how to circumvent these preventable and fixable struggles.

When we have Impulse control skills, we stop, consider and make better choices. There are many fun ways to help kids of all ages learn to practice impulse control. In this episode, learn 4 ways you can help your kids learn and practice these skills in engaging ways.

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Erin helps overwhelmed parents get a handle on positive discipline with step-by-step tips. She covers where to start to see the most progress quickly and which tools to cover next to keep it simple and effective. She also covers some tips on teaching heart felt apologies.

We used to take a pretty hard stance on digital technology in the lives of children, especially young children. Dr. Katie Davis, Associate Professor at the University of Washington (UW) and Director of the UW Digital Youth Lab, has been researching and speaking about the impact of digital technologies on young people’s learning, development, and well-being for 20 years and shares with us what research really shows about how we can best guide our children's use of technology by age.

Sarah shares with us some of the most simple and beautiful ways to stay grounded, connect with our kids and be kind to ourselves during the parenting journey.

In this episode, Sarah and Erin have a deep and meaningful conversation around the everyday struggles we face as parents.

Sarah Ezrin is a world-renowned yoga educator, content creator, and mama based in the San Francisco Bay Area. She is the author of The Yoga of Parenting. Sarah loves guiding people along their wellness and parenthood journeys. Her words, classes, and social media are supportive, healing spaces where people can feel seen and heard. You can follow Sarah on Instagram @sarahezrinyoga and find her book, The Yoga of Parenting: Ten Yoga Based Practices to Help You Stay Grounded, Connect with Your Kids and Be Kind to Yourself on Amazon

Sponsors:

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Medical Trauma is real and often starts during toddler years. Learn about the latest research and easy tips to remove pain and fear around needle anxiety so your child can have a healthy relationship with their healthcare for life. This is a must-listen episode with Dr. Jody Thomas, Executive Director of the Meg Foundation, a nonprofit dedicated to empowering kids and families to prevent and relieve pain. She and her team are dedicated to creating mass access to the best resources, tools, and information.

Parenting is full of ups and downs, heartbreaks and triumphs. Many of these experiences are universal for parents. In this episode, I share the heartbreaks and triumphs and what I've learned about them in my journey so far. Because I know they are common to so many parents from the emails and questions I receive almost daily.

In today's episode, Erin and Talia discuss the power of play and its critical role in child development along with some great strategies to increase play for ALL children!

Talia, known for her solution-focused approach and practical strategies, is an ambassador for The Genius of Play - a national movement spearheaded by The Toy Association to raise awareness about play’s critical role in child development and encourage more play in children’s lives. Visit www.thegeniusofplay.org for play ideas, expert advice and more play-inspired resources for families and educators.Talia is also a contributing mental health expert for numerous media outlets including CNN and CBS, an 8-time winner of NJ Family Magazine's Top Docs Awards, and a certified holistic health coach and personal trainer. Talia can be found on Instagram at @taliastarr_therapy

To find Your Village classes go to: www.yourvillageonline.com or download the Parenting Beyond Discipline app from the Apple Store or Google Play store.

Sponsors

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Yes, Cam's last name really is Awesome and he's got a great story about how that came to be. But that's just the beginning of this entertaining, deep, and educational discussion with Cam, "The Motivational Comic" former Olympic Heavyweight, Multi-time National Champion boxer with over 400 wins under his belt, and now turned motivational speaker for schools across the country. Cam shares his wisdom and his journey with kids every day and now with us on why resilience is so important for success and how we can help our kids cultivate this trait and see our progress as winning even if it didn't take us where we initially intended.

Sleep is such an important part of our health for children and adults alike. Sleep is a time for children to develop physically, neurologically, and cognitively, to grow, repair and integrate. For adults, we also need sleep to rejuvenate, repair, and even problem-solve our waking issues. How can we ensure we are setting up good habits for our kids and also for ourselves to support everyone's waking potential? What if we or our kids aren't good sleepers? Is there a way to fix this? Terry Cralle, MS, RN, CPHQ, specializes in sleep health and wellness. She is a national speaker, educator, and author on sleep, Terry is the co-founder of a four-bed sleep disorders clinic and has served as a consultant to a variety of industries and organizations on the topic of sleep health. Her work in the field of sleep medicine has included clinical research in insomnia as well as advocating for educational initiatives such as drowsy-driving prevention. As a frequent speaker and guest lecturer on the topic of sleep for schools, universities, sleep clinics, U.S. corporations, and employee wellness companies, Terry educates a wide variety of audiences on the critical importance of sleep to physical and psychological health, growth, and development, safety, optimum functioning, productivity, peak performance, and quality of life.

Whether it's in our parenting approach that fixes power struggles, picky eating, respectful discipline exchanges, or any other area of your life, making changes that last is hard. We must stick with something long enough to see changes and make it our new habit. Things in our environment and our approach often sabotage our efforts at true lasting change. Remove these, and our rates of success vastly improve. In this episode I discuss what science has found about how to set ourselves up for success when it comes to sticking with the process long enough to create lasting change in our behavior that leads to success in reaching our goals.

Regardless of the path our children will choose in life, there are skills we can impart that will vastly contribute to their happiness and success in any and every area. Erin talks with Elizabeth West, about what these skills are and how we can begin to impart them from the earliest ages and continue to develop them throughout their childhood journey so they are ready to face the decisions and responsibilities of young adulthood in college, careers, and beyond.

Elizabeth is CEO of EWC Consulting, Elizabeth began her career as an Admissions Counselor at UNC Pembroke where she began to see students' stories, triumphs and struggles come to life. Throughout her 25 years in higher education, working with students and helping them become successful continues to be the greatest joy of her career.

Screens should be part of our lives, not the center of our lives, and Ash helps caregivers navigate the world of tech using consistent, loving boundaries. Through the Instagram account, TheGamerEducator, Ash has helped tens of thousands of families make screen time beneficial for the whole family. As a public educator for over a decade, Ash saw the opportunity in making learning in their classroom more engaging by employing the positive strategies that many games do very well.

In this episode, Ash shares their amazing balanced approach to managing technology in the home with kids of all ages. The tips and ideas are new and fresh, and I know you will learn a lot!

This Episode Sponsored by:

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Dr. Cara Goodwin is a licensed clinical child psychologist, and parenting expert who has gained a large following (116K) on Instagram for her practical and research-backed advice as the "Parenting Translator."

In this episode, Dr. Cara breaks down the latest research on parenting and child development, specifically on engaging with your child using language that can help you better understand their behavior to improve your communication and connection.

Sponsors:

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Family is what we make it. With so many different ideas and structures for family, planned or not, Julia shares with us how to embrace your idea of family, your values, your structure, your pivots, your unique children, and the unique ways you support and parent them through their childhood journey.

Julia is opening up an honest, funny, raw, and earnest conversation looking at what creating a family really means and how it might show up differently than expected. In this episode, Julia and I have an honest conversation about how we are each parenting differently than expected.

This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp: choose among 1000s of therapists in almost every specialty: www.betterhelp.com/pbd for 10% your first month

Our children come into our world already connected to their authentic selves. We see early on their unique quirks and personality traits, and soon after hints of their gifts and talents. We, as their guidance through the development process are entrusted to help them learn the skills they need to let their unique selves shine through and develop those strengths and learn to manage and grow in areas where they struggle. I share a unique perspective in this episode on how to approach this momentous task.

Digital media companies know a lot about human psychology and brain development and use it to their advantage, to gain and hold not just children's, but adult attention too.

Join Erin and Gaia for a stimulating discussion about how digital media uses our psychology to grab our attention and keep us coming back, for kids and adults alike.

Gaia Bernstein is a Law Professor, Co-Director of the Institute for Privacy Protection and Co-Director of the Gibbons Institute for Law Science and Technology at the Seton Hall University School of Law. She writes teaches and lectures in the intersection of law, technology, health, and privacy. Her book: Unwired: Gaining Control Over Addictive Technologies shatters the illusion that we can control how much time we spend on our screens and shifts the responsibility for a solution from users to the technology industry, which designs its products to be addictive.

As involved and caring parents we want to raise kids who are kind, respectful, and decent. If this is one of your goals as a parent, you will love today's guest, Colleen Doyle Bryant. Colleen is an expert on common decency and the author of five books and more than 50 learning resources about making good choices for the right reasons. Her Talking with Trees series for elementary students and Truth Be Told Quotes series for teens are used in curriculums around the world while parents and teachers download more than 100,000 of her learning resources on honesty, respect, and responsibility each year.

The way we parent has a significant impact on how our children develop. But equally as important is their education and for me, the most challenging part of parenting has been finding the right educational fit for each of my children. Preschools offer a lot of great options. How do you know how to find the best fit for your individual child's strengths and personality? Formal education (5+) doesn't usually offer quite the same variety of opportunities, but school choice is becoming more prevalent. Creative parents who understand the system can find great options when their assigned neighborhood school is not a fit. In this second episode, I cover the concepts of learning styles and multiple intelligence theory so you can have a deeper understanding of how your child learns, where they naturally excel, and why this matters when finding the right fit, preschool through high school.

The way we parent has a significant impact on how our children develop. But equally as important is their education and for me, the most challenging part of parenting has been finding the right educational fit for each of my children. Preschools offer a lot of great options. How do you know how to find the best fit for your individual child's strengths and personality? Formal education (5+) doesn't usually offer quite the same variety of opportunities, but school choice is becoming more prevalent. Creative parents who understand the system can find great options when their assigned neighborhood school is not a fit. In this first episode I share what ideal learning environments should offer and how to go about finding a good fit, preschool through high school.

Healthy coping skills are the key to riding life's ups and downs, our resilience. Resilient people are happier, more self-confident, take more risks, and therefore achieve more goals. There are healthy (adaptive) and unhealthy (maladaptive) coping strategies. Most of us got unhealthy messages about how to cope when we struggled emotionally. Learn how to lead your children to healthy coping strategies they can adopt for life and which ones to avoid.

Anxiety is on the rise among both youth and adults with a full 32% of teens struggling with some level of anxiety, 9% having an anxiety diagnosis, and 20% of adults having an anxiety-related diagnosis. What tools can we teach to our kids early and all the way through childhood to help them cope with life's uncertainty with more confidence and acceptance?

Kyle suffered from social anxiety as a teen but learned to overcome it and has gone on to become a mental health advocate, speaker, author, and social media influencer who is passionate about solving the problems associated with poor mental health in the world and the impact they have on our communities, especially teens and youth.

Very few know how to give a healthy apology and yet it is such an essential skill in all our relationships. In this episode, Erin shares the 3 pieces to a proper apology and how to teach kids how to give proper apologies. Then Erin answers a question for a family who's really struggling with their preschooler listening and following directions and expectations. How do they fix the bad habits they've fallen into to get back on track with fewer power struggles and more peace and cooperation?

This Episode Sponsored by:

Ritual: vitamins, protein powders, pro-biotics for EVERY body, women, pre/post-natal, men, and kids. www.ritual.com/parenting for 10% off your first 3 months

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So many things make sense in theory but when it comes time to implement, it's a whole different story and parenting is no different. How do we take the strategies from an idea to a real action plan that we can implement? In this episode, Erin gives a simple plan with the 3 best tools and how to implement them for getting started when changing to positive/conscious/gentle discipline.

This episode is sponsored by:

Ritual: vitamins, protein powders, pro-biotics for EVERY body, women, pre/post-natal, men, and kids. www.ritual.com/parenting for 10% off your first 3 months

Armoire: stylish clothes for all occasions. Find your style. Feel confident. armoire.style/parenting for 50% your first month

BetterHelp: choose among 1000s of therapists in almost every specialty/experience: www.betterhelp.com/pbd for 10% your first month

Stokke: Premium Children's Furniture, Prams, Car Seats. Exceptional ergonomics & unparalleled comfort. Designed to be closer. Free cushion with any high-chair purchase www.stokke.com use promo-code: registerwithstokke

You may already be parenting using mindfulness techniques in ways you don't even realize! These simple yet effective tools can often get to the bottom of your child's emotional struggles quickly and effectively. Kelly Winkler is a certified yoga instructor, certified children's yoga instructor, certified teacher, and a mom of 4 who has been working with children and families for over 25 years. She teaches parents, teachers, and therapists how to bring yoga and mindfulness to themselves and their children. In today's episode, she shares some of her great tips and insights with us!

This Episode is Sponsored By:

Ritual: vitamins, protein powders, pro-biotics for EVERY body, women, pre/post-natal, men, and kids. www.ritual.com/parenting for 10% off your first 3 months

Otherworld: NEW healthy (vegan, veggies mixed in) cookie mixes! eatotherworld.com use code PARENTING for 25% off

Stokke: Premium Children's Furniture, Prams, Car Seats. Exceptional ergonomics & unparalleled comfort. Designed to be closer. Free cushion with any high-chair purchase

The overall state of children's mental health has been on a drastic decline since even before the pandemic. From 2007 to 2017, pediatric suicide rates tripled. The good news is there is a lot parents can do to help children build and protect their mental health. Learn about the signs of deep depression, resources for suicide prevention and support for helping your child with depression to prevent suicide as a potential outcome

This episode brought to you by:

Thrive Market: Online groceries for healthy lifestyles (organic, vegan, paleo, whole30 and more) everything you need delivered to your door: Thrviemarket.com/parenting for 30% off and $60 gift

Ritual: vitamins, protein powders, pro-biotics for EVERY body, women, pre/post natal, men and kids. www.ritual.com/parenting for 10% off your first 3 months

Otherworld: NEW healthy (vegan, veggies mixed in) cookie mixes! eatotherworld.com use code PARENTING for 25% off

Armoire: stylish clothes for all occasions. Find your style. Feel confident. armoire.style/parenting for 50% your first month

The overall state of children's mental health has been on a drastic decline since even before the pandemic. From 2007 to 2017, pediatric suicide rates tripled. The good news is there is a lot parents can do to help children build and protect their mental health. Learn about all the ways you can help your children develop strong mental health strategies and protect their mental health in part 2 of this very important 3 part series.

This episode brought to you by:

ZocDoc: Free app to manage all your healthcare. Find doctors that take your insurance, see doctor ratings & schedule online. zocdoc.com/parenting

BetterHelp: choose among 1000s of therapists in almost every specialty/experience: betterhelp.com/pbd for 10% your first month

Otherworld: healthy (vegan, veggies mixed in) pancake, waffle and brownie mixes eatotherworld.com use code PARENTING for 25% off

The overall state of children's mental health has been on a drastic decline since even before the pandemic. From 2007 to 2017, pediatric suicide rates tripled. The good news is there is a lot parents can do to help children build and protect their mental health. Learn about all the ways you can help your children develop strong mental health strategies and protect their mental health in this very important 3 part series.

This episode brought to you by:

Armoire: armoire.style/parenting for 50% your first month

Better Help: betterhelp.com/pbd for 10% off your first month

We work hard to guide our kids in developing a strong sense of self and solid self confidence. But the world is full of influences and messages that, as kids age, we will have less and less ability to control. So how can we help our kids navigate these and learn to protect their own positive sense of self? In this episode Erin talks with guest Melody Pourmoradi, who has made it her life's work to teach kids and parents the tools to build and maintain healthy self-esteem.

Our sponsors make this podcast possible. Please support the podcast by supporting our sponsors!

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Did you know there are fundamental outcomes for each stage/age to support your child's development of self-confidence? Self esteem is a fundamental component to life happiness and success. It helps us weather life's ups and downs with more ease and skill. This episode covers the critical components children develop at each age/stage of their childhood and how you can guide them at each of these stages.

Our sponsors make this podcast possible. Please support the podcast by supporting our sponsors!

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I made a huge mistake this past year, both a parenting and a personal one. In this episode I share not only my mistake but the other common mistakes we parents often make that can affect how effectively we parent and live in all areas of our lives, as well as guidance to avoid these mistakes so we can show up better, stronger, more patient, and more energized for ourselves and those we love. Happy New Year!

Today's Sponsors:

Ritual - www.ritual.com/parenting for 10% your first 3 months

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Bonding is the vehicle by which we form and maintain strong attachments in relationships. This is something we do all throughout life, and therefore all throughout our children's childhood (and beyond), not just in the first months or years. The ways we bond will change as our children grow and they will respond better to different ways of bonding at different times on their childhood journey. Learn recommended activities for bonding (that also benefits your child's development) by age, infants through adolescents, in this episode.

Support the show through supporting my sponsors. This week's sponsors:

Mommy Makeup: mommymakeup.com/parenting or Use code PARENTING at checkout for 25% off

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How do you help your young child learn to follow rules and expectations in school when you aren't there? A dad feels in over his head in helping his bright and precocious daughter make better choices when he's not there to guide her. Erin gives some great insight into this issue, guidance and ideas for making this situation better for everyone, including discerning when the issue at hand is not all due to the child and how to address both sides of this important issue.

My sponsors are the reason I'm able to keep bringing great episodes each week!

Visit this week's sponsors:

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What does it take to raise a child who is confident, kind, and responsible, a child who you know will make good choices and will grow into the amazing person they are meant to be, even as they start to venture out more on their own? Meet my son Carter, 13 (almost 14) with big goals and dreams, scholar, musician, athlete and all-around really nice kid and hear the biggest things things I did throughout his earlier childhood (and still today) that are helping guide him towards his happiness and potential.

Play is so much more than just a stress break! Play is the basis for development and growth: emotional, social, cognitive, physical and language, especially in the earlier years. But play benefits kids learning and development way later than we might think. Learn about the benefits of play and how to create an environment at home and school that gives your children, of any age, the benefits of growing through play!

My sponsors are the reason I'm able to keep bringing great episodes each week!

Visit this week's sponsors:

Mommy Makeup: mommymakeup.com/parenting or Use code PARENTING at checkout for 25% off

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What is the one things all kids need to thrive? Love? of course! But there is something else all kids need that isn't always easy to see, understand or give when they are pushing our buttons, when they are struggling with the bigger parts of their personality. This one thing all kids, need is key to raising confident, happy kinds who thrive in the world. I break down how to approach situations to feel less triggered by their big personality and feelings so you can be more present and available to guide your children towards their potential of better choices and behaviors.

KJ know as @gentlehealingmom, has built a community of over 100,000 followers on Instagram due to her incredible content and authentic bravery to which so many parents can relate. KJ is on a journey to heal her childhood trauma and parent differently. Because I relate so much to her experience, our conversation is deep and rich, as she shares some amazing insights and tips with us. If you too are on a journey of gentle/conscious parenting, you will relate and glean so much from this conversation.

Sponsors:

Mommy Makeup: mommymakeup.com/parenting or Use code PARENTING at checkout for 25% off.

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Armoire: armoire.style/parenting for 50% off your first order

Toddlers can be so incredibly resourceful and shrewd, which is great when it comes to problem-solving but maddening for a parent trying to set boundaries and expectations. What do you do when discipline tools don't work? During this holiday week, we're bringing back the most downloaded episode of all time, where Erin gives the steps and tools to plug the loopholes, even with the most persistent and resourceful of toddlers!

Every parent knows from the earliest day that their child(ren) are unique individuals. Ask any parent to describe their child, even in late infancy and early toddlerhood and they'll give you the most amazing adjectives: curious, friendly, creative, funny, precocious, persistent, brave, social...Parents today want to support their children to develop their strengths and leverage them. We want our children to not just survive in life but thrive, and live with joy, passion and excitement. How do you guide your child while allowing their own drive and motivation, self-awareness and self-efficacy to be the leading factor? This episode dives into this by age starting in toddlerhood ,of creating an environment and opportunity for each of your unique children to connect with and develop their personal strengths, interests and passions.

TEDx Speaker and author Heather Chauvin was dying to be a good mother and it almost killed her, literally. Hear her inspirational story of transformation of mindset to understanding one not need to be "perfect" to be a great parent. She shares her wisdom of learning to align her work and parenthood with her deeper purpose and the courageous conversations with her spouse to create a life that was in balance with their values of alignment for themselves and their kids.

It's hard to say "no" even when we know it's for the best, whether it's because of not wanting to deal with big reactions, or see our kids upset or experience their negative feelings towards us. There are ways to make these messages not just easier to deliver but also easier for our kids to hear and accept. In this episode I share my 3 best tips for setting boundaries and telling kids no so that it's both easier to accept and easier to deliver!

How do you help guide a child who has a big aspect to their personality? Big emotions? Big excitement? Deep feelings? Big ideas? Deeply passionate? As parents we are well aware of expectations at school and out in the world. But the amazing part about children is that their "big" stuff is raw, authentic, and genuine. How do we help them balance the "big" parts of their personalities with the expectations? Or should we? If we should, when and how do we help them do this without stifling their authentic excitement, feelings, ideas and passions? It's all in this episode!

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A mom with a 6 year old hasn't set up any discipline or expectations in the home as of yet. She feels so overwhelmed now, she doesn't know where to start. At some point or another, we all feel like we fall behind in our parenting. Between life changes or stressors or things with our kids that just blindside us. In this episode I share what we want to focus on at each age/stage to help our children be ready for the next level of responsibilities in life and how to make a plan to catch up if we ever feel we are behind.

Sponsors:

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This really is a must-listen episode for any parent who want to offer the best school experience for their child that they possibly can. Whether your kids are still really young or already in school, you will want to listen to today's episode with Dr. Eric Chagala. He is a multi-award winning educator with a heart of gold, dedicated to giving kids the most engaging school experience possible. Dr. Chagala has turned a failing school into a highly sought after school-of-choice through innovation, design thinking and the empathic process and brings it all into the kids' learning experiences.

Learn about Dr. Chagala's school, the amazing values and processes that are integral part of each and every curriculum. It will enlighten you as to what school could and should be for all kids pre-K - high school.

Dr. Chagala also shares what parents can do to find or help create schools that nourish and engage children's minds that will allow them to discover their unique strengths to bring to the world.

To follow Dr. Chagala's school and learn of all the amazing projects, electives and how they implement their values into every classroom, follow: VIDAsharks on twitter.

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Follow on IG: @yourvillageonline

New Podcast: Erin Royer Presents Minding The Gap

Parents know, letting fear stop us can really hold us back in life. We can each think of a time in childhood we wish we had overcome, or overcome the fear sooner and stepped into being more brave. Being brave doesn't mean we aren't afraid. Being brave means we feel the fear and do it anyway. As adults we know the great benefits of pushing ourselves past our discomfort (even if we struggle sometimes too!) Kid fears often seem so minor to us now. But they are big for them. Regardless of age, how can help your child see past the fear to the benefits of trying and overcoming, toddlers to teens? Like everything, it looks a little different at each age. I cover some great tools for helping kids build their courage muscle. Because the more we use it, the stronger it gets!

Even though parenting goals are going to differ, most parent share the common goal to build and maintain a relationship with their child(ren) of trust, safety and connection. This means creating and maintaining the relationship in such a way that our kids want to come to us with their problems and struggles, that they feel safe with us to share their fears, their hurts, their goals and their dreams. We want them to see us as a place of refuge, a soft place to land, and a helpful and positive resource. In this episode, I discuss how to create this type of connection that will serve your kids and your connection for life.

Today's Sponsor:

Mathnasium: Visit mathnasium.com to find a center near you

Follow on IG: @yourvillageonline

website (for parenting classes on demand)

https://www.yourvillageonline.com

Anger in parenting often feels so loaded & unacceptable. But every emotion has a purpose. Learning how to accept them, hear the message they are sending and then use them for the positive is what emotional competence is all about. In this episode I cover how we can learn to accept, tune in, process and use our anger as a parent for positive introspection, growth and as a catalyst to getting needs met that we may be ignoring. This also help us become better equipped to lead and guide our kids in working with their own anger and its messages.

Sponsors:

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Negativity in kids can show up in 2 ways, what appears to be opposition or refusal and negative self-talk/self-sabotage. These two are actually linked and can be greatly reduced with one change in approach. I cover this along with additional specific tips for helping kids overcome negative self-talk and self-sabotage.

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It seems like guilt in parenting is just par for the course. We come into this journey with so many expectations, hopes, and goals about the way we will parent, but when the reality of day-to-day parenting sets in, we often feel we are falling way short on so many fronts. So in this episode I'm here to help you more realistically assess your expectations and confront your guilt in the 6 most common areas parents experience guilt. In addition, I cover two major decisions parents make that are often cause for big guilt and the realities that show how children can actually benefit. This episode is a no guilt zone!

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When toddlers & kids set boundaries, it can often come across as rude and off-putting. Believe or not, many times kids are actually setting healthy boundaries for themselves, just not using the best skillset! In this episode I discuss what healthy boundaries for kids sound like and what areas are common and healthy to support, so you can make room to allow for them while guiding them to use better delivery skills.

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If you want to learn one simple tool, that builds healthy self-esteem, a growth mindset, a sense of independence & responsibility, and improves cooperation, for kids of all ages, this is a not-to-miss episode! This is my favorite tool because it does so much and it's so simple!

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Toddlers aren't the only ones who have big feelings. Kids of all ages and adults too, have big feelings. Emotional competence is the key to managing these feelings in positive ways. Emotional competence or intelligence is the a keystone to a life of happiness and success. So helping our kids develop this is a huge gift. Learn the 4 key parts to emotional competence and how to improve them in yourself and guide your kids to have a strong foundation regardless of age.

Toddler behavior can be overwhelming and even baffling. In this episode I share some basics of toddler behavior so you can more easily decode it, as well as ideas for improvement. Once we can decode it, we can make a plan for improvement. But we have to take several factors into consideration. Learn what these factors are, tools for decoding toddler behavior and ideas for improving behavior through teaching and guiding.

A healthy for personal growth and goals is a good thing, while perfectionism is push to be and do everything perfectly, an impossible standard. Perfectionism often comes from a fear of judgement and research shows perfectionism is far more nurture than nature. In this episode I cover how to support kids in developing a healthy mindset in setting and striving for goals without spilling over into the unhealthy striving that shows up as perfectionism.

The more capable our kids become, the easier it is on us and them too! Here are 4 common areas I see parents waiting or avoiding teaching independence that can cause a lot of frustration throughout their parenting journey and leave their kids lacking skills that will help them live happier more successful lives. I cover ways to allow and guide children to learn these valuable skills.

These are 4 common expectations that can cause a lot of frustration for parents. But armed with the right information, these can be a lot easier to manage. In this episode I cover these 4 very common expectations and what to do for each so you don't have to struggle through them.

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Frustration in parenting is normal. But with some tools we can eliminate or minimize a lot of it, leaving more room for joy and connection. In this episode I cover 6 different ways you can address the frustrating moments so you can rise above, making yourself much more effective in problem solving and teaching. This has a positive effect in how kids react, creating better habits and behaviors going forward, making parenting much more rewarding and enjoyable.

Media is everywhere. It's almost impossible to avoid. Are there some pitfalls and dangers? Of course, just like any other area of life. This is a quickly evolving landscape and it's only going to evolve faster. We can both protect our kids and teach them good online choices and still allow them the opportunity to benefit from all the positive aspects. In this episode, I cover the many ways you can leverage the positive aspects of media with your kids.

Did you know you have an emotional bank account for every relationship? We have different accounts with each of our kids, our partner, friends, our own parents, colleagues... In this episode Erin talks about the concept of the emotional bank account and how when we keep them in a good positive balance how it can pay big dividends. Learn how to assess each account and add uniquely to the account you have with each child and work with your partner too, to make sure you are each contributing to each other's emotional bank account too.

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Is your toddler, child or teen sometimes bossy, controlling, throws attitude or tries to get their way by communicating in ways you don't like? If you want to raise strong, independent children who know how to advocate for their wants and needs in respectful ways, this episode is for you! Raise kids that use emotionally skillful and mature communication with the steps covered in this episode whether you have toddler, teen or a child in between! This episode has lots of examples, steps for each age, and what you can expect by age (and it's probably a lot more than you think!) when you create a home environment with the space for kids to share their needs along with guidance on how to setup respectful communication strategies. Happy parenting!

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Do you wonder how you can allow your child the room to discover and be their true selves and still be respectful & cooperative too? In this continuation from episode #290 where I shared how to set up positive open-ended expectations, in this episode I share how to set up an environment where kids are not just allowed but encouraged to advocate for their own needs, goals and autonomy in ways that are still respectful, bringing the concepts from these sides together.

Emotional intelligence gives us and our kids freedom to choose how we want to show up in the world. Emotional intelligence is such an important attribute to develop early in life. But most of us didn't have this kind of upbringing ourselves. So having the tools to help our kids develop this is something we practice and learn. The earlier we can help our kids with this, the easier it is for them. Alyssa has some amazing knowledge to share about how we can do just this!

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Does your toddler or child have a lot of big ideas, a light that shines bright and a lot of spirit? Are you trying to figure out how to best make space for these bigger than life attributes but still setup expectations of respect and cooperation? Believe it or not, these can go hand in hand beautifully with the right combination of freedom and more open-ended expectations. This episode covers some great ideas and tips for balancing these two, sometimes seemingly-opposite goals.

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School shootings are nothing new. As parents we can feel so powerless when the issue continues with little to progress on programs and policy. In this episode, I cover the basics of talking to kids. But beyond that, I share how you and your kids can do more to keep everyone safer at school.

Co-dependence is rampant in modern society, with studies showing 90-96% of adults exhibit some level of co-dependence. Because children do need parents to varying degrees throughout childhood, it can be difficult to parse out healthy parent-child connection to when it spills over to co-dependent patterns. Since most adults have experienced some level of co-dependence in their own childhood, it's hard to always recognize how it expresses in our own parenting. How can we as parents begin to break these patterns for our kids so they can learn healthy relationship patterns? In this episode, I cover what co-dependence is, signs of co-dependence in general, how it often shows up in parent-child dynamics and some steps to freeing our kids from this unhealthy and often detrimental pattern of relating.

Co-dependence is rampant, with studies showing 90-96% of adults exhibit some level of co-dependence. Because children do need parents to varying degrees throughout childhood, it can be difficult to parse out healthy parent-child connection to when it spills over to co-dependent patterns. Since most adults have experienced some level of co-dependence in their own childhood, it's hard to always recognize how it expresses in our own parenting. In this episode, I cover what co-dependence is, signs of co-dependence in general, how it often shows up in parent-child dynamics and some steps to freeing our kids from this unhealthy and often detrimental pattern of relating.

As parents, we get the opportunity to teach our kids what we wish we knew earlier in life. Starting with the foundation of positive discipline, we can break unhealthy relationship cycles. Once this foundation is in place, we can move beyond to breaking or even preventing other unhealthy cycles that would otherwise hold them back. Imagine where you will see your child go in life and what a gift you will give them when they are free from unhealthy cycles! In this episode I cover 10 unhealthy cycles confront and break for ourselves and for our kids, freeing us and them to live their and our lives full of potential, joy and adventure.

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Allowing the voices of shame to have power can hold us back from fully showing up for ourselves and others in our lives. What if we could help our kids learn how to mitigate shame from their earliest days so they don't have to struggle and suffer? Learn how shame shows up from our earliest days, what it looks like in kids, how to approach your kids with compassion when they are dealing with shame, how to have conversations with our kids around shame and how to teach kids to become shame resilient. Website: yourvillageonline.com IG: @yourvillagonline FB: /yourvillageinc Book: Connected Parents Guide to Toddlerhood

Shame comes from feeling "not enough" and is often perpetuated by beliefs in societal norms that are misguided and dangerous. All parents are susceptible to parenting shame but the pressure moms feel to be perfectly present and connected is especially strong. Shame often gets in the way of us being present in all of our relationships, with ourselves, our children, our partners and beyond. Learn about common shame triggers that affect parenting and how to conquer these to be able to be more present in your relationships with your kids. Website: yourvillageonline.com IG: @yourvillagonline FB: /yourvillageinc Book: Connected Parents Guide to Toddlerhood

Research shows girls self-esteem peaks at age 9 and that boys self-esteem has also fallen in recent decades. The reasons are varied but there is a lot that parents can do to foster a strong baseline for self-esteem in their children starting in infancy. This episode is chalk full of tips and information to avoid common pitfalls that well-meaning parents often fall into that can actually damage self-esteem and what to do instead.

Here are 2 of the 5 most common parenting myths and some fixes that Erin helps parents untangle every day. Unfounded belief systems can keep us trapped in fear and therefore from being the confident leader and guiding force we would like to be for our kids. After uncovering the truth about these first 2 myths, she shares some tips to get you started in approaching these situations in ways that are empowering to both parent and child.

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The last episode of a 3 part series on parenting styles, where Erin covers the latest parenting styles that have evolved in the last several decades. Are there new things science and society has learned that we should be incorporating? What do kids of today need that past generations did not? What things should we be incorporating into our parenting that will benefit the future for our kids?

New parenting styles have been evolving and emerging over the past 30 years. Learn about life skills our children need for confidence, success and happiness that are missing from some of the modern styles and how to make sure you are preparing your children with those skills.

Parenting style greatly affects our children's motivation and initiative, confidence and self-esteem, and long term happiness and success in relationships. But parenting styles have evolved significantly over the past 100 years. We've even seen rises (and some declines) in newer styles. How do we know what is best for our family and child in the world we live in and the future they need to be ready for? Is there a blend to consider? or should we be trying to stay more within one style? In part I, learn about the classic styles most psychologists still refer to in scientific literature today, the positives and negatives of each and the expected long term outcomes into adulthood. How to pivot or readjust if you've gotten a little off track, like we all do from time to time! Part II will cover the modern styles that have come into popularity in recent decades.

Have you ever struggled through a discipline exchange? Discipline just fell flat because your child wasn't having it? Or you had a tool that worked like a charm and then just stopped working all of the sudden?! Why do these strategies other people swear by not work for you at all or work for a while and then stop? Erin addresses 4 common reasons discipline strategeis can fail so you can get your positive discipline game in the flow.

Our kids have so much potential. With our guidance, they will reach far beyond anything we accomplish and I hope they do! That is my goal for my family and for any other family who shares that vision for their child's future. In this episode I dive into two building blocks that are a foundation for raising kids to this next level. I bring awareness to our own potential blocks as parents and uncover a lot of new information in this episode.

During the developmental process, there are many windows of opportunity to setup positive habits. Outside of these windows, creating the habits: sleep, healthy eating, cooperation, empathy, and more, are more difficult. Knowing these windows and how to leverage them can make some parts of parenting a whole lot easier. Tune in to learn about these opportune times.

If you ever have to take your child, infant to teen to the doctor again, this is an episode you don't want to miss! Dr. Jody Thomas shares seriously simple tips for making what can be a very anxiety provoking experience for most kids into a much easier experience for everyone, child, parent and medical professional alike. She shares the most up-to-date science based tools to reduce and even eliminate pain and anxiety! Setting up children for success in these visits early on can literally save their life later on in adulthood, as Dr. Thomas also shares why and how.

Is it possible to miss a developmental window? A mom writes in asking if this is a possibility, if they missed the window when their son was more willing and pushing for independence and now they need to make up for it? Or is something else possibly going on? Erin gives some insights about developmental windows, getting to the crux of behaviors and fixing refusals in our young children.

A mom wants to make big changes in the way she disciplines her kids and the way they relate to each other. Tough times, got life off to a tough start but she wants to change and make things better for everyone. She knows it's not too late but the idea feels so overwhelming she doesn't know where to start. She also doesn't want to overwhelm her kids with too many changes at once, making it worse for everyone. So she wrote to ask Erin how she can undertake this process and make sure it's a successful transformation rather than a disaster.

One of the more anxiety provoking decisions is finding and hiring the right fit for your family, whether it's occasional babysitter or a nanny who works in your home regularly. Carole Kramer, shares amazing information about vetting and finding the right caregiver for your family, broaching tough subjects with your caregiver and dealing with special circumstances and special needs you may have in your family or for your children.

A mom and dad are concerned about their son's behaviors while at school and are seeking help on what they can do to help him learn to make better choices when he's not under their direct supervision. Erin helps parents break things down to first learn why misbehavior happens. Once we know why, then we can address the unique reason with the proper solution. She then gives ideas and tips to work on fixing behavior for several different scenarios and reasons when kids are out of direct supervisions.

Young children and even older children can struggle with all kinds of fears, phobias and anxiety throughout childhood. Erin answers a question from a mom about her 4 year old who is dealing with a fear that has gotten progressively worse and a new fear that has also recently come about. Erin discusses these fears, why they happen. What is normal and when it crosses over and gives parents a plan and steps to support their child in learning to face their fears and anxieties in healthy loving ways without ignoring the issue.

In this episode Erin talks with Katy Joy Wells about her 4 step process for curing toy clutter. Not only is it a stress relief for parents, it actually is for kids as well and helps them go deeper in play, supporting independent play. Learn the steps, the benefits and how to make your child's play space more inviting.

Toddlers can go from quiet and calm to grabbing, hitting and worse within seconds. Erin covers great foundational information so parents can understand how to guide and coach from ages 1 to 4 as well as how to help older siblings who may be getting the brunt of the aggression when they are within striking range of a toddler sibling.

Toddlers often have big reactions. But what do you do when it seemingly comes out of nowhere? How can we work on new behaviors and prevention when it takes us by complete surprise? Erin dives into some great fundamentals of the steps of toddler emotional development so parents can feel assured when they see these sometimes troubling behaviors and the steps to guiding young children towards better behaviors when they feel upset, anxious or overwhelmed.

What do you do when your toddler is playing with their private parts? How do you answer questions about sex, private parts, puberty and more? How do you prepare your child for puberty, dating and beyond? Most of us grew up and still carry some level of discomfort and even shame around our own sexuality and body. How do we parent from a place of empowerment and help our children grow up feeling more confident about their bodies, sex and sexuality? We have you covered in this episode! We do speak frankly and openly about many topics of puberty and sexuality in this episode. To learn more about Ariel and her great work go to mylittleyoni.com or see her account on IG @mylittleyoni

We often think of overindulgence as too many toys, too much "stuff" or too many sweets. But the latest research is showing that overindulgence comes in two other forms besides just material overindulgence and actually these other two areas are even more prevalent. The outcomes are not favorable. Erin covers this research, including the common outcomes and what parents can do to avoid these types of overindulgence, by age from toddlers all the way through the teen years! So no matter your child's age, there is information for you to support your child in developing a strong foundation for success!

A mom asks Erin for help in finding strategies to work with her very difficult to discipline 5 year old. The struggles are running the gamut from power struggles, not listening, negative ungrateful attitude, bedtime struggles, whining, basically anything but cooperative, including a possibility of ADHD. Erin gives some great insights and strategies for re-building a new foundation for this relationship to get the behavior turned back to a positive direction.

Sometimes we think we are following the steps to fix problem behaviors, when we might actually be unknowingly doing the opposite. Erin shares some great foundational information to troubleshoot any problem area. If you are seeing repeated behaviors you don't like to see, and want to figure out how to get it to stop, this episode can help you figure out the sticky area. Then Erin applies this information to a mom dealing with very difficult power struggles at bedtime.

What do you do when your preschooler tries to rule the roost, not just saying no and trying to undermine parenting authority over themselves but even trying to control parental behavior? There are several reasons preschoolers may engage in this level of control. There are clues our children give us as to what is happening. Once uncovered, parents can tune in to these clues and help their young child work through the issues that are leading to controlling types of behaviors.

Erin shares some new insights into supporting kids to develop a strong and healthy sense of self-esteem throughout childhood. Learn a new paradigm on how to view the development of self-esteem and some great new ideas for working with your children to help them develop into their most confident and independent selves.

How do you handle a child's behavior when it is seemingly manipulative and/or controlling in nature? Erin gets to the heart of the issue, what kids are really trying to tell us and how to help support them overall, and work with them in that moment when they are trying to control the situation or manipulate others into behaving the way they would like.

Preschoolers can really struggle with social skills and this often means they react in aggressive ways towards one another. How do we help sibling and friends make better choices when interacting with each other? Part 2 of this mom's question involves bedtimes that have gone from bad to worse. How can this family get a better handle on bedtimes and get back in a better direction? Erin covers both of these topics in this one episode!

More children than ever, at younger and younger ages are experiencing moderate to severe mental health issues related to depression and anxiety. Childhood has been derailed for so many kids. Missed opportunities in social interactions has deeply affected many kids. This phenomenon hit close to home for Erin this past week and she shares her experience, what she noticed, signs your child's struggles may be more than a "stage" or just needing tweaks in your parenting approach and steps to take to get your child the help they need as soon as possible, even when many child therapist are overwhelmed with patients right now.

A 6 year old is really struggling with a lot of different misbehaviors like not listening, aggression, and making poor choices and both the parents and his nanny are wondering how to help him through these trouble spots, especially at specific times of day when he seems to struggle the most. Erin covers some great foundation work as well as specific tips for helping this young boy work on slowing down and making better choices when he gets overwhelmed and upset. In addition Erin shares her latest parenting struggle she had, how she handled it and why she handled it in that manner. Tune in to get some great tips from this episode!

How do you help your young child learn to follow rules and expectations in school when you aren't there? A dad feels in over his head in helping his daughter make better choices when he's not there to guide her. Erin gives some great insight into this issue, guidance and ideas for making this situation better for everyone, including discerning when the issue at hand is not all due to the child and how to address both sides of this important issue.

Some days parenting is just overwhelming. Some days life is just overwhelming. If you have difficult days with either, let alone both at that same time, you are not alone. Erin had a very overwhelming week both in parenting and life, feeling like she was failing at both. She shares her coping strategies both with managing and overcoming feeling overwhelmed whether it's parenting related or not.

Money is such a taboo subject in so many families. We all have our own hangup around money, be they societal, familial or both. How can we have a more positive feeling towards finances and money? How do we teach our kids to have a better, more positive outlook and relationship with money than we likely do or did now or in early adulthood? Ken Honda is a best-selling author in Japan. His latest book is called "Happy Money: The Japanese Art of Making Peace with Your Money" Erin absolutely loves his teaching in this arena and is excited to have him share his insights with the Parenting Beyond Discipline audience.

What tools should you use with a toddler who tries to push their will for having things own way? The ways we use the tools or the tactics our toddlers try can often render a tool ineffective, or less effective. Erin gives step by step guide to setting boundaries and rules with respect and love that will be followed and using tools to their highest effectiveness.

All parents want to provide their kids with as stable an upbringing as possible, especially if they didn't have that growing up. But life is full of changes big and small. How do we support kids through these changes like moves, new schools and especially divorce? What are options and compromises we can do to make these as smooth and stress-free as possible for our kids? Erin covers areas to focus on when we have big changes to guide our children through to make sure they come through the other side, not just ok, but able to build resilience from the experience. It's such an important life skill and supports their ability to live a happy and successful life.

Mental health challenges in children has been on the rise for some time and the pandemic has only magnified it for many kids. Sometimes dis-regulated behavior in actually toddlers, young children and teens is actually due to mental health struggles. How can you know the difference, when to reach for outside help and how to support your child through it and build skills for resilience in life's challenges? In this episode, Erin interviews Dr. Beurkens leading holistic psychologist for answers to these questions.

What do you do when your preschooler wants to be in charge of everything? Wants to have control even over things that are out of his realm of ability to manage and decide? Erin answers this mom's question about working with a 4 year old who wants to have control over everything and pushes back when he doesn't have control.

Toddlers have a gift for finding our weaker spots when it comes to getting power and undue attention. Different parents have different areas of struggle, be it meals/food, potty training but especially bedtimes and middle of the night wake-ups, when we're exhausted and much more likely to give in. In this episode Erin talks about steps for setting strong boundaries around power these common problem areas, especially middle of the night wake-ups where strong willed toddlers may engage in screaming and crying tactics. Whether you have a middle of the night or bedtime issue or another common power struggle you need some guidance and steps to resolve, tune in to this episode!

Personal temperament is only one contributing factor to personality differences. While not every child is going to follow common birth order or gender developmental and personality characteristics, most will to at least some degree. Understanding what these differences are and why they happen can greatly aid you in parenting your individual child. If you are curious to learn more about these, this is the episode for you!

Big emotions in young children often mean big reactions, and often times they are even physical in nature. How do you help your toddler or younger child learn better ways when they have big physical reactions to their big emotions? Erin answers this question specifically for a mom who's toddler is banging his head in response to big emotions but also shares a broader perspective and answer for any parent dealing with big physical reactions to emotions.

Erin goes beyond toddlerhood in this episode, sharing with parents of toddlers and older kids alike, what we are working towards and focusing in the years beyond toddlerhood as our children's development and unique qualities really begin to unfold and blossom.

Erin dives deep into emotions, both for our kids and our own, to give and do our best to help our kids and ourselves become the most emotionally intelligent versions of ourselves. She talks about kids who clam up and don't like to share or talk about emotions as well as those with bigger-than-life reactions and how to work with both, as well as how we as adults can keep working on our own emotional intelligence. It's a lifelong practice and as we get better and better, we are better role models and have more skills to help guide our children as well! Win-win!

In this episode Erin shares a dilemma she faced about how to handle a situation with her daughter, sharing with her listeners how sometimes parenting is convoluted and complicated just like all human relationships. She shares what she weighed in her mind as she did her best to make what she hoped would be the best choice for her daughter. She hopes this inside look into her relationship and her own mind will be both helpful and a relief to her listeners who sometimes worry they might be doing something "wrong".

A mom wants to know how to avoid power struggles and set a strong foundation for connection and communication even with her very young (9 month old) daughter, since a lot of the positive discipline tools cannot be implemented this early. Is it possible? What should she do to stay out of a power struggle over things her baby shouldn't be doing, trying or getting into? She doesn't want to make a game out of it. Erin shares tools parents can use, even with babies who are just starting to become mobile, but also are great for toddlers, preschoolers and any young child who is struggling with boundaries. Even though babies and young toddlers likely cannot yet talk, or share ideas or wants, there is a lot they can understand and therefore some great tools you can implement to stay out of the struggles.

What do you do when you and your parenting partner have different parenting styles? Although this question comes from a divorced mom, Erin answers this question for any parents, living together or not on how to build bridges and come together and when to allow each other to parent differently. Then she covers how to address parental guilt, because we all have it, regardless of our circumstances, we always feel like we are falling short somewhere, somehow.

A mom has been diligently working with her almost 3 year old on his social skills for play date interactions. Yet her son is still struggling with some aggressive reactions when things don't go his way. With some great information and descriptions, Erin covers this topic and then finds some simple tweaks this mom can make to really turn these interactions around and give her son that little extra instruction that can really turn this situation around.

A mom wants to know how to handle it when her 3 year old responds aggressively towards his toddler younger brother without making the attention to the unwanted behavior feel like it's rewarding the behavior. Erin discusses this common toddler challenge but also brings in some new information and perspective on this common issue, in a way she hasn't shared before.

If you are dealing with power struggles any time of day, this is the episode for you. Erin covers some specific tips for this hour-long morning power struggle with which a mom is dealing. Then she covers some great tips and guidelines for solving almost any common power struggle!

What do you do when you are simply overwhelmed with your preschooler's behavior? How can you get this turned around so that you can have better days? Erin starts with some really important basics like working with high needs babies & kids, addressing temperament and four easy to implement positive discipline tools to get things turned around quickly!

Toddlers do strange things. These things seem outright rude, disrespectful and mean. But what are they really thinking? Learn about what toddlers are really thinking about when engage in these behaviors and how you can help them learn to do better.

There are times when short term parenting is the best option and times when long term is the focus. Learn what your long term focuses are at each at each stage of development and therefore how to best balance the long term and short term parenting.

A mom is worried that her young toddlers more pronounced separation anxiety may be causing more harm than good when she leaves him at daycare/preschool. Erin gives great information on development at his age and how it can weigh the decision of how to best handle this case of separation anxiety, along with a progression of steps to help this little guy gain the security he needs to thrive more independently.

We ALL experience parental guilt over one area or another where we feel like we might be falling short (aka being imperfect or human!) How do we allow ourselves to be OK with our life circumstances, allow our kids to struggle at times or not be 100% perfectly tuned in all the time and let go of the guilt? Erin answers a question for a mom dealing with mom guilt over her single parenthood status. Erin also shares some of her struggles with mom guilt over these same issues of not always being 100% available, over pushing her kids hard sometimes to do things they don't want to do, and over her own divorce.

What do you do when you have one very high needs/high maintenance child and one very easy going child? How do you make sure the mellow child gets his/her needs met if they are so quiet and the other is so demanding of attention? Erin covers the tips, pitfalls and ways to make sure your quieter child gets his/her needs met. Then a question that brings up what to do when toddlers & kids behave in ways that push us out of our comfort zone. The particular questions is about a toddler who seems insistent on touching his private parts. Children will often behave in ways that make us uncomfortable or push us to our brink. How can we prepare for this as parents and face these areas of struggle at least enough that we pass on as little as possible to our children? Listen and find out!

What do you do with a child who is constantly trying to control everything? Or even just anything that isn't meant for them to control? All toddlers and preschoolers want some level of control (and tweens/teens is another push) and often times it's more than is really warranted. It's not even uncommon for young children to try to control siblings and even parents, where they go, what they do, "Mom stop singing." Or telling friends and siblings what or how to play. How do you work with a child who seems to need way too much control? The second question is about working with kids on lying. How to teach honest telling and setting boundaries and expectations around honesty by age and without shaming.

Erin covers A LOT in this one episode. Erin dives deep into a question about misbehavior in some different ways than before. She discusses respectful parenting - what it is and what it is not, nighttime parenting versus daytime parenting, tips for moving siblings into the same room and tips for introducing change to kids. Phew! That's a lot of topics in one episode!

Do you find your toddler, child or teen dealing with fears and/or anxiety and aren't sure how to help them? In this episode, Erin talks about what are normal fears and anxieties in children and how steps and tips for helping children work through these common emotions, as well as when to seek outside assistance. Then Erin covers a new tool for toddlers to teens that can decrease meltdowns, tantrums and power struggles and helps build an even stronger bond and connection for parents and children.

Some things we do as parents seem fun, but can something seemingly innocuous be a detriment to our child's development of their full and unique selves? Erin discusses a post from a fellow parenting expert that really got parents talking, some agreeing and many disagreeing with the post. Erin weighs in with her thoughts on whether or not their are detriments to quizzing our young children. Then Erin answer several questions in one from parents asking about breaking negative family patterns from their own upbringing, with steps for working towards better family connection and communication to overcome any areas of concern from their own upbringing.

Erin answers a question about can we teach our toddlers/kids to say "no" to us? If so, how do we go about doing this so that they can learn to do it appropriately and respectfully, especially with toddlers? Then Erin talks about ADHD, the signs and symptoms, when and how to get an assessment, other things of which to be aware, treatment options, and the positives of ADHD (and reframing any diagnosis) with a new lens for what different ways of experiencing and interacting with the world can bring for us all.

Big meltdowns? Big power struggles? We know toddlers can behave irrationally as can preschoolers. How much is normal? How much is too much? When should they outgrow this? At what point should a parent consider assessments and outside intervention to get their child back on track? Erin covers what a "normal" meltdowns and tantrums and when things, even with the most emotionally sensitive of children, should greatly improve. If not, when and how to get your child assessed for issues that can lead to bigger behavioral challenges.

Erin gives great insights and tips into a 6 1/2 year old's big meltdowns and feelings. Is it normal at 6 1/2? What can this mom do to help her child learn to calm down easier and better and work through these big feelings? This question segues perfectly into the discussion about our own temperamental traits versus our children's and how to recognize them, understand them and then be ready to help our child shape the areas where they have challenges.

Erin shares a BRAND new discipline tool she's never talked about before that can help circumvent power struggles. Then she discusses high needs babies (toddlers & children) What we mean by 'high-needs' the five traits and what they look like in high-needs and therefore why parenting a young child with this personality type can be so stressful along with tips for working with your high needs baby/toddler so that by childhood (age 5-6 and beyond) the positives of these traits can shine through.

How do you know the right time to move to a toddler bed? When it is a good time what is the best way to go about it to minimize the crazy bedtime chase or power struggle to stay in bed? Learn some great tips for dealing with this milestone. Then Erin shares her wisdom and insights for setting a family foundation that benefits everyone, not just the kids at the parents' expense.

For many young children they have now been home almost 24/7 with parents for their entire lives, as far as they remember. That's a lot of bonding time, but also can present more challenges with a getting used to daycare and preschool. Some school age kids may have their challenges when it comes to going back to in-person learning. Erin shares tips for smoother transition into or back to daycare and schools. Then Erin shares some of the special challenges of parenting a tween.

We parents put a lot of pressure on ourselves to do things perfectly, or at least extremely well. But it's OK to make misjudge and make a wrong call. We make mistakes and we learn and we grown. But what do we do when we've potentially misjudged, and set the boundary strongly? Is there ever a time and a way to gracefully back out without setting ourselves up to be mowed over every time we set a boundary? Erin shares guidelines and tips for working through these exact scenarios!

Erin shares her tips for a dad who wants to know if there is a way to fix the middle of the night wakeups with a no cry solution. Next Erin gives guidelines and tips about when to ignore versus when to correct toddler behavior.

What do you do when your preschooler/child insists on touching others uninvited? Erin gives several guidelines and tools for teaching body autonomy and respect in both directions, giving and receiving. Next, what do we do about outside influences that are different from our parenting values and goals, such as day-cares, schools or grandparents? When should we be concerned and how do we best handle those scenarios?

Not many people are good at apologies. In this episode, Erin shares some personal experiences around apologies and how to teach and give proper apologies between both adults and children. Then Erin answers a question for a family who's really struggling with their preschooler listening and following direction and expectations. How do they fix the bad habits they've fallen into to get back on track with fewer power struggles and more peace and cooperation?

This is episode is a must-listen, chalk full of tips on minimizing power struggles in your home! Toddlers and kids in general will often grab for power where they can. Why do they do this? Erin covers the common reasons and ways to fix that to minimize power struggles and then steps to disengaging and taking control over common struggles including some common pitfalls in dealing with common struggles over bedtimes and mealtimes as examples.

What do you do when your child is constantly struggling with reactions to life not going perfectly their way? Playing the martyr and lots of tears when they get corrected over the smallest things? In this week's episode Erin gives lots of tips for a family dealing with just these types of over-reactions.

2020 was one doozy of a year and many of the remnants are following us into the start of 2021. Erin shares her message of care and hope for weary parents heading into 2021 and tips for getting our feet underneath us and moving forward. Then a new sleep question about can you sleep train while co-sleeping? Erin shares a calm/peaceful method for bedtime and nighttime weaning that can help parents get their babies/toddlers off of feeding as a sleep association.

2020 was definitely a difficult and unprecedented year. Erin looks back on how she got through as a parent and a person and shares thoughts about how she will move forward into 2021. Then she answers a question from a mom about how to help her child who seems to give up so easily on everything. Perseverance is a trait that definitely contributes to success so how can she help her develop more perseverance? Erin shares many ideas and tips for supporting children through this process.

Erin goes back to basics on how kids and parents shape each other's behavior, it's basically a 101 on dealing with those trouble spots and power struggles, be their bedtimes, middle-of-the-night issues, mealtimes, or major meltdowns. Learn about how children learn to find our weak spots and how to circumvent. Then Erin addresses the stresses parents are under during this ongoing pandemic with more tips and some relieving statistics about how our children are doing to relieve parental concerns.

Overindulgence is a lot more than too many toys or sweets. During this pandemic, overindulgence is sometimes a daily necessity but a fine line, how do we walk this line? Then Erin answers a question that perfectly fits with the topic, is a family's morning routine a form of overindulging and if so, how should they go about making the shift?

How do you stay calm and coach your child when they are using hurtful words? Erin covers what to do in the moment, as well as 4 step process to use in teaching your child better ways of sharing feelings rather than angry mean words.

We all have parenting anxiety over one thing or another throughout parenthood, but likely over many things! Currently, there is likely a lot more parenting anxiety than ever before. Erin shares her experience with her own parenting anxiety and her wisdom for how she's dealt with it in the past and currently.

A mom wants to know how to help her very shy toddler become more comfortable in social situations. Erin covers the social development at 2 along with tips for working with shy children. Next Erin talks about when and how to reason with children and how this can help circumvent power struggles.

Does your toddler have fears? Toddlers often have big reactions that seem irrational. How do you know when and what is normal for fears in toddlerhood and what is over the top and may require some intervention? Erin answers a mom's specific question around this as well as addresses the topic in a broad format for any/all parents wondering about their toddler's fears.

Erin gives a mom step-by-step for fixing those pesky middle of the night wake-ups and battles for coming to mom and dad's room. In the second half Erin covers tips for helping a preschooler become more independent when she is constantly seeking attention every time mom is busy with something else.

A mom wants to know if she should be doing some type of play based learning activities from home for her preschooler since the pandemic is continuing with no end in sight? She is concerned her daughter may be behind when she starts kindergarten. Another mom wants to know how to deal with persistent asking for more, more cake, more time at the zoo, more, more, more, when? when? when? why? why? why?!

It's a triple questions episode!! How to help a toddler who is getting easily upset with sharing and saying MINE about toys and parents! Another parent wants to know how to have smoother transitions with co-parenting exchanges and our 3rd question about if her son's issue should be a concern for language development. Erin also shares common milestones at 2 and 3 and any red flags to be aware of for language development in toddlers/preschoolers.

A mom asks for help with her daughter's big struggles with emotions, likely due to late language milestones. Since developmental areas often overlap, Erin shares why this happens and how this mom can work with her daughter to get her caught up. The next question is about late bedtimes and how to help a 3 year old calm down for sleep. This mom asks in particular about mindfulness practices for young kids, a fun new topic not yet covered on this podcast!

Triple question episode!! Single mom trying to work from home is hoping for some tips on keeping her 2 year old more independent so she can work! Changes have caused potty training regression and mom is feeling frustrated and defeated. Our third question is a toddler who is waking up screaming multiple times throughout the night and engaging in pulling her own hair out.

A mom is feeling defeated over her son hitting the neighbor girl every time he sees her and other playmates at the park. After 2 months of trying to teach better behavior, it's not getting better. Erin gives steps for dealing with hitting in that moment, including some parents often miss that make the teaching most effective and one pitfall many parents often fall into that make it worse. Then Erin reveals the common pitfall parents are falling into that is making bedtimes much worse and how to fix it so that their daughter will go to bed and stay in her bed to fall asleep, as well as a quick tip to fix a new potty struggle.

Erin gives guidance to a family dealing with tantrums during middle of the night wake-ups. Screen time is definitely a double edged sword in most families right now. Erin gives tips to a mom wondering how to help curb the power struggles around screentime with her preschooler. Lastly Erin shares her latest family/parenting concern with the audience. To see all the classes go to https://www.yourvillageonline.com

Whether you are just considering divorce/separation or are already on the path, parental guilt is a common emotion that visits all of us frequently throughout the process. Here's what to know about one of the main reasons (or it was one of my main reasons) we wrestle with guilt, how it will affect the kids. Learn what research says about what REALLY affects the kids and how to circumvent these affects. Hint* it's not nearly as bad as you might think and is actually quite positive with the right approach.

A mom asks about what actually would be considered "violence" in media and how to watch out for and talk to children when they hear arguing or conflict in media or any thing else that could be construed as violence. Then a family on the move wants to know how to help prepare their preschooler who is very averse to change!

We hear a lot about strong-willed children. But what about those who give up easily on everything? Erin answers a mom's question about how to guide her child who is low in perseverance in order to become more persistent when tackling anything new that doesn't come easily. Next Erin answers a mom's question about when to step in and when she might want to ignore her preschooler when he/his friends are engaging in name calling.

Children do better with schedules. It adds a sense of security and normalcy. But some children need schedules even more than others. Learn how to tell if yours is one of these children and how to support them, especially when things need to move around a bit, including tips for outings and vacations. Then the oh-so-common bedtime meltdowns. Erin covers the basic steps for all 3 bedtime methods so parents can decide which one fits them best and some must-know tips to make any of them more successful.

Welcome to a special edition episode on co-parenting through divorce. This first episode covers is about self-care, coming to your own best decision and doing the emotional work to move forward as healthy as possible for a solid foundation for yourself, your kids and your soon-to-be-ex. If you aren't sure what you want yet, if you are questioning if you are still wanting to work it out, this episode may also offer insights and resources that you help you get clearer in your decision.

Sometimes we want to protect our kids from life's difficulties, all out of love and well-meaning. But is it really in their best interest? Erin gets out of the box this week about facing our own struggles as parents to let our kids "step into the arena" and take risks and therefore risk failure, heartache and pain. Erin shares her thoughts on weighing helping kids take risks that can give them the courage to show who they are so they have opportunities to win big. How to help kids develop what they need to handle the failures when they fall.

A mom whats to know how to deal with disrespect in the form of demands and tone without going around and around. Erin gives some great general guidelines and six tips for teaching and setting respectful boundaries with young kids. Then 3 questions came in all about parents dealing with preschoolers/toddlers needing a lot of attention and it being a struggle with the continuing lockdown. So Erin gives some words of support and guidance for parents, especially of toddler but some for all parents during this time.

Do you have questions or concerns about your kids returning to school and/or their exposure to COVID? Not sure how to get your child to wear a mask or the recommendations from the AAP? This week Erin has a special guest, Dr. Jennifer Variste, a pediatrician on the show to answer all our questions about weighing the pros and cons of back-to-school, and how to minimize our risk for our kids and our families.

What do you do with a preschooler who has a lot of perfectionistic tendencies and inflexibilty when it comes to expectations and outcomes of daily interactions and projects? Erin gives some great tips on helping kids learn to see mistakes as opportunities to learn and grow and how to become more flexible with the expectations from life's circumstances. Then she helps a mom who's son had an infection on his penis and is now averse to allowing anyone to even take a look at it. Erin gives steps for helping this mom and son on a path to healing and learning to trust other's help him get and stay healthy when needed.

How do you help a toddler who seems to cry about every little thing? Give a choice? Crying. 1-2-3? Crying. Offer dinner they don't like? Crying. What does a parent do? Erin covers the basics to look into first then goes into additional reasons some toddlers may be more prone to crying over upsets than others and how to help them develop their skills so everyone can be less exhausted and annoyed with all the meltdowns and crying! Also a quick answer for a mom who is asking about extreme separation anxiety and parental preference, even while home!

How do you break the habits in sleeping and bedtime when they've been going on for years? Can you do it with little to no tears? Adding complication, this step-parent wants to know if it's even possible given co-sleeping is still happening in the other parent's home? Then, how do you help a preschooler become more independent in their play? A tired mom, is looking for a little more me time! Erin gives some tips on this too!

A lot of parents struggle with toddlers and children who are overly persistent. But what do you do when your child gives up very easily on small tasks and barely even tries? How do help your child develop more tenacity? What about a toddler who is asking a lot about death, including her own? How do you be honest about death without scaring your child into being concerned about her own?

A double question from one mom with big toddler issues of screaming when upset and super stressful bedtimes, not staying in bed and 1 1/2 to 2 hour bedtimes. Erin helps this mom with lots of tips of where to start and steps to fixing each of these. The second question is from a step mom, really struggling with their 6 year-old who is not listening at home or school and has gotten in trouble at school for his behavior.

Erin answers a question from parents of a very young toddler who is engaging in some sexual-type behavior during car rides and they aren't sure what to do. Another question from a mom who wants some information on how to raise strong girls, how to send messages and support her daughter growing up confident and strong.

How do you help a 1 year old find better ways of sharing frustration when they don't have much language skill yet? Then what do you do when you inherited a family pet but it isn't working out, yet your child has become attached? A mom wants to know how to approach this sensitive situation without breaking her preschooler's heart.

How do you balance your time between siblings, especially when you have one who is very demanding and the other is not? Erin helps a mom figure out how to work with this family dynamic and the guilt it has brought. How do you protect younger siblings from a toddler who gets physically aggressive? Erin gives 5 tips for working with this scenario and working with an aggressive toddler to protect younger siblings.

Toddlers can be very bossy, so much so that this episode includes two questions about how to handle bossy and demanding toddlers. How do you handle a toddler telling a parent what to do and the attitude that often accompanies these demands?

A mom asks about some major meltdowns from her 3 year old that go on for 20-40 minutes over small things, like food breaking. She's tried play therapy, making sure physically all is ok. She has no idea what else to try. She turns to Erin for any additional tips for helping her daughter with her emotional outbursts. But first Erin answers another mom's question looking for some tips about setting up a developmental play space for children, infants through 8.

A mom who is adopting asks a question about parenting a child with a history of trauma. However, many kids are experiencing trauma due to the conditions and stresses from the pandemic. So many changes, lives turned upside down. Is your child experiencing some trauma? What does it look like? How do we support kids to heal from trauma be it from a natural disaster like the pandemic or those coming out of the foster/child welfare system? Erin dives into these answers in this episode

Scientist have been studying the effects of the very limited social interaction of children on their metal health and development. Learn what they are finding, if there is cause for concern and things you can do to support their health and development at home. Also a mom asked about what to do or say when her 3 year-old who has been observing dead bugs, and such and asking about death. What do you say or not say to toddler asking about death and what happens when we die?

How do you raise a child who is not spoiled? Erin talks about what her understanding of an "unspoiled" child is, and the three areas to focus on to make sure children grow up kind, caring, independent and responsible. The second question is about what to do when a child struggles with competition and gets overly upset when losing. Erin talks about the development of competition in all children and children who naturally have a competitive nature.

A mom is wondering how to night time potty train when her daughter is waking up with a very full diaper every morning. But she's been daytime trained for over two years. Shouldn't she be ready? What are the steps? Erin answers this plus a question from another mom wondering about how to get rid of the bedtime bottle with her now 4 year-old. He won't take a cup and she's also concerned about his calcium intake if she gets rid of the bottle.

With so much family togetherness, sibling bickering and fights are definitely a more frequent struggle than ever. Erin answers a mom's question on how to navigate this for both short and long term. A second question about how to handle a play-date guests common potty accident issue, and how to set boundaries with other people's kids, in general.

Erin gives a mom tips for breaking her toddler from middle of the night wake-ups for her bottle, eases a mom's fears about long good-bye's and leaving her son crying at dropoffs, after a few minutes of sharing words of support for parents struggling at home with kids of all ages and their various pain points during safer-at-home.

How do you handle a toddler who hates the car so much she hyperventilates during a car ride? Erin helps a mom get to the bottom of why this is happening and how to fix it. The second question is a mom dealing with her toddler's head banging and loud rocking at various times throughout the night when he wakes up to put himself back to sleep. Erin shares why this can be happening, if it's normal and when a parent would need to be concerned and want to seek an assessment.

First Erin gives some words of support to all parents. Then Erin answers a question from a mom who is struggling with several levels of misbehavior, aggression, lying and not listening/power struggles and gives this mom some background about lying and to work on this as well as the places to start with working on the other underlying issues.

Erin shares her coping strategies during this tumultuous time for staying as sane as possible. Then to get back to a bit of normal, answers a question about a toddler who screams and screeches when frustrated with some tips on how to get this to stop!

We hear so often about toddlers and big emotions. But what about a toddler who tends to minimize or brush over negative emotions? How do we help them recognize and connect with those emotions too? Then how do we help a child remember good table manners without all the reminding and nagging at mealtimes?!

Erin walks through a particularly difficult exchange between a mom and her 4 year old son, with lots of general tips and guidelines as well as specifics for dealing with situations of disrespect as they wind up more and more out of control and how to pull them back.

Summer is in full swing so let's talk about fun new parenting hacks for summer along with safety tips for kids from 0-18!

How do you travel with an toddler who is anxious about traveling? Even if your toddler is just an antsy traveler (and what toddler isn't?!), this episode has the tips for you! Also how do you help your child if they are having potty accidents at school?