124: How to be a good parent to teenagers, using evidence. An interview with Matilda Gosling

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It's one thing to get advice on how to parent, it's another to have independent studies that give real evidence on how well one approach works rather than another.

Faced with raising two young kids in a COVID lockdown, social scientist and skilled researcher Matilda Gosling looked for a book that gave her advice that was based on sound evidence. She discovered that such a book didn't exist, so set out to write it.

Described by investigative journalist Hannah Barnes as 'A rare entity: a parenting book that is accessible, well evidenced, practical, gritty and not hectoring. In short, one that is genuinely helpful.' I knew we all needed to hear about what Matilda had found.

THE BOOK
Teenagers: The Evidence Base, weaves together insights from fields including social and experimental psychology, neuroscience, family systems and adolescent development.

CONTACTING MATILDA:
https://www.matildagosling.com/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/matilda-gosling-11a95521/?originalSubdomain=uk
https://matildagosling.substack.com/

In the interview we cover:

1. Navigating the ups and downs of the teenage years - The book discusses how the teenage years are not just constant "storms and stress" but have complex weather patterns with both positive and negative aspects.
2. Supporting teenagers' identity exploration - The book advises letting teenagers experiment with different identities and not labeling them, to allow them room to continue developing.
3. Facilitating healthy friendships and relationships - The discussion covers how parents can support their teenager's friendships, even if they don't approve of all their friends, and have conversations about healthy romantic relationships.
4. Talking to teens about sex and sexuality - The book emphasizes the importance of parents proactively discussing sex, sexuality, and porn with teenagers, rather than leaving it to schools or the media.
5. Maintaining self-care as a parent - The book stresses that parents taking care of their own needs and well-being is crucial for supporting their teenager's well-being.

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