#35 5 Sex Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have to Improve Their Sex Life, with Dr. Adam Mathews

On the show today we are joined by Dr. Adam Mathews. Dr. Mathews is a licensed marriage and family therapist with over 15 years of experience working with couples and families. He’s an adjunct professor for both North Central University and Piper University and he’s also the cohost of the popular podcast, Foreplay Radio Sex Therapy. Currently, Dr. Mathews also serves as president of the North Carolina Association of Marriage and Family Therapists.

In this episode we’ll be discussing the five sex conversations every couple needs to have to improve their sex life and address the regular problems that persist in relationships when sex is MIA or when your partner isn’t comfortable talking about it. Who better to talk on the subject of sex in relationships than the expert, Dr. Mathews!

Highlights

• How Dr. Mathews came to be a therapist and started Foreplay Read Sex Therapy.
• Why some couples intentionally avoid difficult conversations about sex.
• Why when conflict grows: disconnection grows and your sex life follows suit.
• The first initial steps, what leads people to therapy and how to uncover the problem.
• What emotional and sexual disconnection does to your relationship.
• The right approach when you want to initiate the ‘sex’ conversation.
• Owning your part in it and focusing on one thing at a time.
• Laying off the pressure when making new requests.
• The “My parents did what?” conversation: what your family was like about sex.
• The “I’ll have what she’s having” conversation: getting away from assumptions.
• The “Indianapolis 500” conversation: what puts us in the mood for sex.
• The “I have a headache” conversation: How to deal with rejection, when you’re not in the mood.
• How to politely honestly and politely say, “Hey just not tonight”.
• The “The professor plum in the bedroom with the lights off” conversation.
• Not underestimating the soft skills: communication and how it can bring connection.
• And so much more!

Tweetables

“Just never force a sex conversation on somebody if they don’t want to have it.” — @MathewsCounsel [0:13:17.1]

“Sex is the ultimate expression of love and connection.” — @MathewsCounsel [0:16:38.1]

“You mention the soft skills and I think that is what they are and I would just say, don’t underestimate the power of this stuff.” — @MathewsCounsel [0:35:33.1]

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode

Dr. Adam Mathews — https://mathewscounseling.net/

Dr. Mathews on Twitter — https://twitter.com/MathewsCounsel

Dr. Mathews on LinkedIn — https://www.linkedin.com/in/dradammathews

Dr. Mathews on Facebook — https://www.facebook.com/dradammathews/

Foreplay Read Sex Therapy —http://foreplayrst.com/