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Three Makes Baby Podcast

Holiday Edition: 5 Ways to Deal with Questions from Family

7 min • 19 december 2019
Conversation at holiday family gatherings can trigger unexpected emotions, especially if you’ve been trying to conceive.
Aunt Alice asks you when you’re going to have a baby or your pregnant cousin, Amanda, joke-brags about how she gets pregnant by just looking at her husband.
Anyone who doesn’t go down a so-called “normal” path to parenthood has encountered many types of questions: the curious, the intrusive, the rude, and the uninformed.
Why can’t you have a child? Why did you decide to do that? Why don’t you just _____(relax/be happy/ adopt/ try acupuncture)?
How do you handle these questions? The first strategy I offer my clients is to consider the person’s intention. Was it an innocent question or not-so-innocent? Is the questioner being caring, curious, clueless or careless?
The exercise is also detailed in my book Three Makes Baby.
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