Podd: TILT Parenting: Raising Differently Wired Kids

TPP 407: Nutritionist Jill Castle on Helping Kids Thrive at Every Size

1 oktober 2024 | 41 min

What comes to mind when you think about raising healthy kids? We often focus on physical health — things like height, weight, and nutrition. But today, we're taking a more holistic look at health with return guest, nutritionist and author Jill Castle. Specifically, e're diving into her new book, Kids Thrive at Every Size: How to Nourish Your Big, Small, or In-Between Child for a Lifetime of Health and Happiness.

In our conversation, we explore why emotional well-being is just as important as physical health, how COVID-19 has impacted kids’ nutrition, and the often-overlooked difference between feeding and eating. Jill highlights how family culture and values shape a child’s overall health and why it's so important to foster a body-neutral environment at home. We also touch on the connection between executive function and eating, plus the role screens and media play in shaping body image.

Before we dive in, a bit about Jill: She's one of the nation’s leading childhood nutrition experts, blending research with practical advice. She believes children can thrive at any size and challenges us to think differently about their health. Jill is the founder and CEO of The Nourished Child®, a nutrition education platform, and the mother of four adult-ish kids.

This conversation feels especially timely as our kids are bombarded with messages about how their bodies should look and behave. Now more than ever, it's crucial to provide them with a strong foundation for understanding health. I hope you enjoy this conversation with Jill Castle.

About Jill Castle

Jill Castle is the author of the book, Kids Thrive at Every Size (Workman, 2024) and one of the nation’s premier childhood nutrition experts. Known for her ability to blend current research, practical application, and common sense, Jill believes that children can thrive at every size. With her paradigm-shifting, whole-child approach, she inspires parents, healthcare professionals, and organizations that serve children and families to think differently about young people’s health and wellbeing. Jill is the founder and CEO of The Nourished Child®, a nutrition education website and podcast for parents, and the mother of four adult-ish children.

Things you'll learn

How prioritizing emotional well-being is as important as physical health in children
What a “whole child healthy” approach includes beyond nutrition
How COVID-19 has impacted children's nutrition as evidenced by increased snacking and coping mechanisms related to food
Why cultivating a body-neutral family culture is crucial
How parents addressing their own food baggage and modeling healthy behaviors positively influences children
Why screens and media significantly influence children's body image and self-esteem
How parents can become 'size-wise' by understanding the pillars of wellness and working towards raising a healthy, happy child

Resources mentioned

Jill Castle’s website (private consultation and other services)
Kids Thrive at Every Size: How to Nourish Your Big, Small, or In-Between Child for a Lifetime of Health and Happiness by Jill Castle
The Nourished Child website
The Nourished Child Podcast
Jill Castle on Instagram
Jill Castle on Facebook
Nutritionist Jill Castle with the Facts About ADHD and Nutrition in Kids (Tilt Parenting podcast)

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TPP 159a: Inside The Flex School with Founder Jacqui Byrne

27 september 2024 | 49 min

TPP 406: Parent Lean-In: How Do I Talk With My Child About a New Autism Diagnosis?

26 september 2024 | 21 min

TPP 405: Navigating PDA in America, with Diane Gould and Ruth Fidler

24 september 2024 | 52 min

In today’s conversation, I’m diving into the much-anticipated book Navigating PDA in America with the co-authors and thought leaders in the PDA space, Diane Gould and Ruth Fidler. We've touched on PDA in past episodes, but I learned so much from this book, and I’m excited to share it with you because PDA is a diagnosis bringing a lot of clarity and relief to families. As it gains traction in the neurodivergence space, the more we know, the better we can support PDAers in our communities. In this episode, we talk about the nuances of the PDA profile and how to one might determine if the identification fits, where North America stands in understanding PDA in comparison with the rest of the world, the challenges PDA individuals face in school and how they can effectively be addressed, what type of therapy is best for someone with a PDA profile, and much more.

About Diane Gould

Diane Gould is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker that specializes in serving autistic individuals. As the Executive Director and Founder of PDA North America, she founded the annual PDA North America conference held in Chicago that has changed the lives of hundreds of PDA (pathological demand avoidance/persistent drive for autonomy) families. She co-authored the book Navigating PDA in America with Ruth Fidler which was published in June 2024. In April 2024, Diane was diagnosed as autistic.

Diane has a private practice in the suburbs of Chicago, where she serves neurodivergent children, adults and their families. Over the last 40 plus years, she has worked for both private agencies and school systems. She currently focuses her practice on providing consultation and training. She works primarily with parents and regularly attends school meetings with them. Diane loves to train educators and therapists so they can better serve their students and clients. And learning about PDA, led her to begin the new PDA movement in North America. Diane formed PDA North America at the first American PDA conference in March 2020.

About Ruth Fidler

Ruth Fidler is an Education Consultant specializing in complex presentations of autism, Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) and emotional well-being. She worked at an all age non-maintained special school for 22 years until 2014 and has worked independently since then. Ruth worked within the school promoting interactive approaches and emotional well- being for pupils with varying autistic profiles.

As well as providing training, she regularly observes and monitors teaching and learning, supporting staff to embed and refine good autism and SEND practice. She often presents at local or national events and conferences for parents and for a range of professionals. She is co-author of the following books: Understanding Pathological Demand Avoidance Syndrome in Children, Can I Tell You About Pathological Demand Avoidance?, Collaborative Approaches to Learning, Girls and Autism, Being Julia, and Navigating PDA in America.

Things you'll learn

How Diane and Ruth came to share their personal journeys working with neurodivergent individuals and collaborate on the book Navigating PDA in America
The state of understanding and awareness of PDA in North America in comparison with the UK and Australia
The factors that distinguish a PDA profile of autism, including using socially strategic ways to avoid demands and more
Ways schools can better support PDA students, such as adopting flexible approaches, building trust, and recognizing the need for fluctuating capacity and recovery time
Why traditional therapeutic modalities may be ineffective for PDA individuals, and what is most important for therapy to be successful and positive

Resources mentioned

Diane Gould’s website
Ruth Fidler’s website
Navigating PDA in America: A Framework to Support Anxious, Demand-Avoidant Autistic Children, Teens, and Young Adults by Ruth Fidler and Diane Gould
PDA North America
PDA Society (UK)

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TPP 158a: The Self-Driven Child with William Stixrud and Ned Johnson

20 september 2024 | 54 min

TPP 404: Sara Olsher on Walking Children Through Hard Seasons of Life

17 september 2024 | 47 min

In today's episode, my guest reminds us that no one goes through life unscathed. We all face big, difficult challenges—it's part of being human. And when we encounter these challenges while parenting, it's up to us to help our kids make sense of things in healthy ways that foster resilience. But how exactly do we do that?

My guest, author-illustrator Sara Olsher, is a strong advocate for talking to kids honestly about the big things happening in our families. She speaks from her own experience, having navigated difficult conversations with her daughter during a messy divorce, followed shortly by a cancer diagnosis. Despite her fears about using the word "cancer," Sara knew it was important for her daughter to understand what was happening with accurate information. As Sara explained in our conversation, “Developmentally, the whole world revolves around them. So if you don't talk with children about these things, they’ll invent a story that centers on them, and they may conclude it’s their fault.”

I love talking with people who take their personal experiences and hard-earned wisdom and turn them into tools to help others feel more supported and confident. That’s exactly what Sara did, and today, she shares her journey with us. You'll hear how she navigated her divorce and used her daughter’s anxiety as an opportunity to learn the power of visual schedules and open communication in helping kids cope with tough situations. She also discusses the series of children’s books she’s written to help parents tackle heavy topics like chronic illness, hospice, cancer, and emotions. One thing that really stood out to me was how going through hard times can actually prepare our kids to live with uncertainty.

In addition to her books, Sara is the founder of Mighty and Bright, a company that helps kids and adults manage their lives more easily with magnetic visual schedules. She shares how she discovered visual schedules almost by accident, but how they transformed her daughter’s anxiety overnight. They sound like a game changer for many families, so definitely check out her resources if they resonate with you.

I hope you enjoy this conversation with Sara Olsher.

About Sara Olsher

After surviving a divorce and cancer all before she turned 35, mom and author-illustrator Sara Olsher took the lessons she learned about helping kids through major life changes and wrote a book. Then another, and another. She now has twelve picture books under her belt, and is the founder of Mighty and Bright, a company that helps kids and adults understand and manage their lives more easily using magnetic visual schedules. Sara was chosen as a 2023 Remarkable Woman by Nexstar Media.

Things you'll learn

Why open communication and honesty are crucial when discussing difficult topics with children
How visual schedules provide a sense of control and security for children, especially when they’re experiencing anxiety related to life circumstances
How children's books can be powerful tools for explaining complex concepts like chronic illness, divorce, and death
Why ongoing communication and flexibility are key in supporting children as they foster adaptability
How parents can heal their own trauma and create a deeper connection with their children by addressing difficult topics openly and honestly

Resources mentioned

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TPP 155a: Inside Landmark College's Unique Approach to Supporting Neurodivergent Students

13 september 2024 | 38 min

TPP 403: The Connection Between Differently Wired Kids and Substance Use, with Brenda Zane

10 september 2024 | 49 min

Just as technology evolves rapidly, so too do the ways drugs are consumed. For parents, it can be challenging to recognize when our kids are using, especially since many products on the market now resemble harmless school supplies or candy. And then if we find our kids are engaging in drug use, how do we even begin to navigate that?

That’s what we’re going to explore today with my guest Brenda Zane, whose oldest son struggled with an addiction to a high-risk lifestyle and illicit drugs for over five years. After nearly losing him to two fentanyl overdoses, Brenda left her marketing career to serve other families dealing with the fear, confusion, and feelings of helplessness of having a child who’s misusing drugs or alcohol, becoming a family advocate and co-founding the nonprofit organization Hopestream Community, where she serves parents of teens and young adults who struggle with substance misuse and mental health challenges.

This is such a powerful conversation and one I truly recommend all parents to listen to, no matter the age of their children, as it’s important to understand the landscape for drug access and use in the lives of today’s kids. During this episode, Brenda and I talked about the importance of open communication and understanding the reasons behind drug use, the dangers of high-potency THC products in younger users, and the challenges parents face when their teenagers experiment with substances, as well as explore the idea that there is a difference between “typical experimentation” and problematic use when talking about marijuana. I know that this can be one of those uncomfortable topics that many of us would rather avoid thinking about, especially if we have a history of substance abuse in our families, but it’s important for our kids' safety that we do the research and create spaces for these conversations to be had at home.

One last thing, please know that this episode contains references to drug abuse, overdosing, and mental health issues. So do what you need to do to take care of yourself if these are triggering themes for you.

About Brenda Zane

Brenda Zane is a family advocate and co-founder of the nonprofit organization Hopestream Community. She’s passionate about serving parents of teens and young adults who struggle with substance misuse and mental health challenges. Brenda’s oldest son struggled with an addiction to a high-risk lifestyle and illicit drugs for over five years. After nearly losing him to multiple fentanyl overdoses, Brenda left her marketing career to serve other families dealing with the fear, confusion, and feelings of helplessness of having a child who’s misusing drugs or alcohol. You can hear Brenda weekly on the Hopestream podcast.

Things you'll learn

How today’s marijuana is significantly more potent than traditional marijuana and how that can impact a developing adolescent brain
Why parents need to stay informed about new drug delivery methods, such as vape pens and edibles, to effectively address drug use in their children
What some of the reasons behind drug use are, including coping with social anxiety or seeking acceptance
How leveraging a child's strengths in positive activities can help redirect their focus and prevent problematic drug use
Why it’s critical that parents create a safe space for teenagers to talk about their experiences and the reasons behind their substance use
When to seek support from therapists and communities that provide resources and guidance for parents navigating these challenges

Resources mentioned:

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TPP 154a: Dr. Mona Delahooke on Looking Beyond Children's Challenging Behaviors

6 september 2024 | 55 min

TPP 402: Parent Lean-In: How Can I Help My Autistic Child with Low Self-Esteem?

5 september 2024 | 20 min

TPP 401: Dr. Billy Garvey on Supporting Our Child’s Mental Health Through the Years

3 september 2024 | 60 min

My fall season is officially starting today and I’m kicking it off with a conversation with Dr. Billy Garvey on mental health. Billy, a developmental pediatrician with over 20 years’ experience working with children in Australia, met last year while he was traveling around the world on a fellowship to explore the connection between how children are parented and their mental health as adults. One of the outcomes of that fellowship is Billy’s new book, which is called 10 Things I Wish You Knew About Your Child's Mental Health, which he was kind enough to send me an advanced copy of. So I wanted to bring him on the show to talk about that, but really to expand on that initial conversation I had with him but so that you all could be a part of it, too. We covered a lot of ground in this extra long episode, including challenges of accessing mental health support in Australia, the need for true inclusion and what that actually means, the importance of unconditional love for kids, attachment and temperament, the role of self-esteem, and the limitations of certain diagnoses, and much more.

About Dr. Billy Garvey

Dr Billy Garvey is a developmental pediatrician with over 20 years’ experience working with children in a number of settings. He is a senior specialist at one of the largest tertiary pediatric hospitals in the world where he sees families, trains clinicians and other professionals working with children and conducts research in child development and mental health.

Dr Billy’s clinical and research interests include child development and mental health, multidisciplinary collaboration, improving health literacy and promoting community engagement to support all families. He holds clinical, advocacy and research roles in government and not-for-profit organizations at a national, state and local level. He is currently undertaking a PhD piloting a model to support child emotional and behavioral development in primary schools and is a Churchill Fellow exploring how social media can be used to support parenting. He is also the founder of Guiding Growing Minds, a social enterprise that aims to give all children the opportunity to reach their potential and live rich and meaningful lives. The Pop Culture Parenting podcast is part of this vision.

Things you'll learn

Why access to mental health support for children in Australia is a challenge, with long wait lists and limited availability of specialists
How unconditional love and support are essential for helping children develop a positive sense of self and navigate challenges, and what that looks like in action
Why the younger generation shows promise in driving positive change and embracing neurodiversity
How secure attachment and sensitive parenting contribute to promoting healthy child development, and ways attachment can be strengthened over time
Why self-esteem is best cultivated through consistent support, celebrating successes, and providing opportunities for growth
The negative implications (and unhelpfulness) of diagnoses like oppositional defiance disorder (ODD) and conduct disorder (CD)

Resources mentioned

Dr. Billy Garvey’s website Guiding Growing Minds
Ten Things I Wish You Knew About Your Child’s Mental Health by Dr. Billy Garvey
Pop Culture Parenting (podcast)
Dr. Tina Payne Bryson
Dr. Mona Delahooke
Dr. Dan Siegel
Dr. Bruce Perry
Thomas Boyce’s The Orchid Child and the Dandelion (Talks at Google)
Jurassic Park and Co-Regulation (Pop Culture Parenting podcast)
Forrest Gump and Kids Who Are Different (Pop Culture Parenting podcast)
Thelma & Louise and Mental Health First-Aid (Pop Culture Parenting podcast)
Blade Runner and Neurodiversity (Pop Culture Parenting podcast)

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TPP 152a: Education Thought Leader Jordan Shapiro on Screens, Kids, and His Book "The New Childhood"

30 augusti 2024 | 51 min

TPP 400: Michele Turk’s Journey of Parenting a Child with Tourette’s Syndrome

27 augusti 2024 | 43 min

There is a lot of misinformation and stigma around neurodivergence that can create extra barriers and challenges for our families. This is especially true for Tourette syndrome, which is often referred to as “the most misunderstood well-known condition,” often the punchline of jokes on late-night TV and sitcoms.

Its in large part because of these misconceptions and difficulty accessing resources that my guest today, Michele Turk, found herself at a loss when her 11 year old son Michael was diagnosed with Tourette. In her new memoir, What Makes Him Tic? A Memoir of Parenting a Child with Tourette Syndrome, she writes vulnerably about the challenges they faced as a family in getting the right support, navigating school, social, emotional, and academic challenges, and how she evolved from thinking she had to fix Michael to understanding her job was to accept him and help him do the same. She wanted the world to know he was so much more than the boy who shouted obscenities hundreds of times a day.

Because Michele has worked as a journalist for three decades, covering parenting, health, and education for outlets like Parents, Parenting, Elle, USA Weekend, The Washington Post, Brain, Child, and Next Avenue, she was compelled to write about her journey as she was in it, and that close up, honest perspective, blended with ample reporting on Tourette make What Makes Him Tic a compelling and informative read.

In this episode, Michele talks with us about the misconceptions about Tourette’s that she came across often in her work as a journalist and her private life as a parent. We also talked about what some of the early symptoms were and how they managed them, how differently she and her husband approached the diagnosis and what it took for them to get on the same page, how her son’s diagnosis impacted her daughter, and more.

Things you'll learn

How parenting a child with Tourette syndrome be challenging and isolating, and why is it important to trust your gut and seek appropriate medical care
What the most common misconceptions of Tourette are
What makes navigating the school system so challenging for children with Tourette
Ideas for navigating complex sibling dynamics in a mixed neurotype household
How finding a passion or interest can help build self-esteem and provide a sense of belonging for children with Tourette

Resources mentioned

Michele Turk’s website
What Makes Him Tic?: A Memoir of Parenting a Child with Tourette Syndrome by Michele Turk
Yale Child Study Center Tic and OCD Program Designated Center of Excellence
Debbie and Her Husband Derin Talk About Their Journey of Parenting a Differently Wired Child (Tilt Parenting episode)
Tourette Association of America
Tourette Association Conference (Tic Con)
Dr. Robert King
Billie Eilish on Living with Tourette Syndrome (Harper’s Bazaar)
How American Idol’s James Durbin Manages Life With Tourette’s and Asperger’s (Tourette Association of America)

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TPP 150a: Heather Turgeon and Julie Wright On Handling Common Parenting Dilemmas

23 augusti 2024 | 50 min

You Might Also Like: In It: Raising Kids who Learn Differently, from Understood.org

22 augusti 2024 | 37 min

TPP 399: Dr. Jeff Karp on Helping Our Kids Energize Their Brain, Spark Ideas & Ignite Action

20 augusti 2024 | 56 min

Okay, so I’ll just say right at the top that my guest today is NOT a parenting expert. He is, however, a neurodivergent researcher, educator, author, and thinker who has some fascinating things to share about helping our kids energize their brains, spark ideas, and ignite action.

Dr. Jeff Karp was that young kid who struggled greatly in school because of his learning disabilities, but when a tutor during the summer after second grade asked him this question – how did you think about that? – everything for him changed. He began to be more self-reflective. By thinking about thinking and how he approached learning, he was able to explore and create tools and systems to help him reach his goals both in school and in daily life.

Jeff is still thinking about thinking today, and shares his ideas in his fascinating book, LIT: Life Ignition Tools: Use Nature's Playbook to Energize Your Brain, Spark Ideas, and Ignite Action. After I read his book, I wanted to bring him on the show because he embodies so much of what we talk about here at Tilt – encouraging our kids to understand how their brain works, get curious about their own strengths and gifts, and figure out ways to “hack themselves” so they can design lives that allow them to play to those strengths.

As a child, Jeff developed ways to navigate school and life that were based on his curiosity, passion, creativity, and connection to nature. Over the years, he’s evolved his approaches into LIT (Life Ignition Tools) and wrote this book to share them with the rest of the world.

About Dr. Jeff Karp

Dr. Jeff Karp holds the Distinguished Chair at Brigham and Women’s Hospital and is a Professor at Harvard Medical School and MIT. He is an elected fellow of the National Academy of Inventors, Royal Society of Chemistry, American Institute for Medical and Biological Engineering, Biomedical Engineering Society, and the Canadian Academy of Engineering.

Specializing in bioinspired medical innovation, Dr. Karp leads a research lab focused on harnessing lessons from nature. He has published over 165 peer-reviewed papers with more than 34,000 citations and has delivered nearly 400 invited lectures. He holds over 100 patents, and his lab’s technologies have led to the formation of thirteen companies.

His notable innovations include a tissue glue for sealing holes in a beating heart, targeted therapies for osteoarthritis and Crohn’s disease, smart needles, a nasal spray that neutralizes pathogens, and immunotherapy approaches for cancer.

Dr. Karp is also dedicated to mentoring the next generation of bioengineers. He has received multiple mentoring awards, and 30 of his trainees have secured faculty positions.

Things you'll learn

How self-reflection and “thinking about thinking” can lead to transformative experiences and strategies for learning and focus
What LIT (life ignition tools) is and how they can be used to support positive shifts and movement
How being intentional in your actions and reawakening your senses can deepen your experiences
What the LEB (low energy brain) dimmer switch is and how it helps regulate energy levels
Why being aware of “bothered awareness” can become a motivator
How practicing cycling through your senses helps one connect more deeply with the world and tap into your powerful biology

Resources mentioned

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TPP 144a: Psychotherapist Dr. Sharon Saline on What Your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew

16 augusti 2024 | 50 min

TPP 398: Parent Lean-In — Help! I Don't Know How to Respond to My Teen's Impusivity & Disruptive Behavior

15 augusti 2024 | 20 min

TPP 397: Dr. Deborah Winking on Raising Capable Kids, Regardless of Diagnosis or Challenge

13 augusti 2024 | 40 min

What does the word capable mean to you? My guest, Dr. Deborah Winking, defines a capable person as an individual living a meaning-filled life determined by them and those who love them with the maximum level of autonomy and agency that they can achieve and authentically access. She’s on a mission to show that there’s a version of capable for every child that is unique to them, and it’s what she writes about in her new book, Raising Capable Kids. The 12 Habits Every Parent Needs Regardless of their Child's Label or Challenge.

Deborah, an educator, school leader, consultant and researcher, has a Ph.D in Educational Psychology, and is the mother of four children, including one child born with a rare neurological syndrome. She’s worn many hats over the course of her career, including working with and advocating for countless children and families, teaching at the New England Center for Autism where she started the first work experience and supported employment program there, and conducting a 5-year evaluation of the New York City Schools Early Childhood Inclusive Education Initiative. She currently works in a public school teaching bilingual disabled learners. In addition to the book we’re talking about today, Deborah is also the author of a memoir called Capable: A Story of Triumph For Children the World has Judged as "Different.”

But for today’s show, Deb shared the story of raising her son Jack and how focusing on the near future, or the next 15 yards as she calls it, helped her stay grounded. We also explored the concept of capable through multiple examples, the role of agency, our vision as parents, and more. I hope you enjoy our conversation!

About Deborah Winking, Ph.D

Deborah Winking, Ph.D is the mother of four (including one child born with a rare neurological syndrome), and has worked with and advocated for countless children and families over the years as an educator, school leader, consultant and researcher.

Deborah has a Ph.D in Educational Psychology from the University of Illinois. She taught students with autism at the New England Center for Autism and started the first work experience and supported employment program there; designed the authentic and portfolio assessment program for the Minneapolis Public Schools; conducted the 5 year evaluation of the New York City Schools Early Childhood Inclusive Education Initiative; worked at the University of Washington Center for Educational Leadership training school leaders and teachers across the country in equity based and student centered instructional practices. She currently works in a public school teaching bilingual learners with disabilities. Deborah is the author of two books Capable, and Raising Capable Kids-The 12 Habits Every Parent Needs Regardless of label or Challenge.

Things you'll learn from this episode

How parents who are raising their kids to be capable share important mindsets and behaviors
What it means to be capable, defined as living a meaningful life with autonomy and agency
Why setting a vision of being capable with your child important, and how can it be adjusted as necessary
How self-compassion and learning from mistakes are crucial in the parenting journey

Resources mentioned for Raising Capable Kids, Regardless of Diagnosis or Challenge

Dr. Deborah Winking’s website
Raising Capable Kids. The 12 Habits Every Parent Needs Regardless of their Child's Label or Challenge by Dr. Deborah Winking
Capable on Facebook
Capable on Instagram
Email Deborah directly at [email protected]
Meghan Ashburn and Jules Edwards on Autistic Adults, Autism Parents, and the Children Who Deserve a Better World (Tilt Parenting episode)
I Will Die on This Hill: Autistic Adults, Autism Parents, and the Children Who Deserve a Better World by Meghan Ashburn and Jules Edwards
Self-Determination Theory
The Art of Case Study Research
Go to us.JKP.com and enter the code TiltRCK20 to get Raising Capable Kids for 20% off, plus free shipping.

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TPP 120a: Back to School Special with Understood's Amanda Morin

9 augusti 2024 | 52 min

TPP 396: Robyn Gobbel on Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors

6 augusti 2024 | 48 min

If you’ve ever used the word “baffling” when describing your child’s behavior, this episode is for you. My guest is Robyn Gobbel, an expert in relational neuroscience and interpersonal neurobiology, the author of Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work and the host of the podcast The Baffling Behavior Show.

As a psychologist, Robyn has always been passionate about working with those kids who have more tricky or extreme behaviors, and she does that by harnessing the power of neuroscience. Through her work with families, she decodes the latest brain science into easy-to-understand principles and metaphors to help parents become an expert in their child's behavior.

During this episode, Robyn and I explore the core issues underlying nearly all struggles in children — dysregulation, disconnection, or feeling unsafe — and how understanding the brain's operation in either connection mode or protection mode can transform our approach to parenting. We also touched upon Robyn’s metaphors for the three brain states: the owl (calm), the watchdog (vigilant), and the possum (withdrawn), which can help us better understand and respond to our children's needs.

I have a hunch many of you will resonate with Robyn’s experience of feeling like she wasn’t doing enough for the kids she was working with, or that it was her fault they continued to struggle. I know I did. And I also find the reminder that it takes time to figure out how to best support our kids, and ourselves, empowering and optimistic. I hope you feel the same after listening to this episode!

About Robyn Gobbel

Robyn Gobbel, MSW, loves coffee, P!NK, and everything about the brain. Once (recently!) her teenager went ballistic on her for getting ANOTHER (glitter!) coffee mug in the mail.Robyn loves cultivating deep, resonant connections with anyone who is up for it, and is especially fond of all the grown-ups in the world who love and care for kids impacted by trauma- helpers, healers, educators, and parents.

Her favorite thing ever (besides glittery coffee mugs) is teaching anyone who will listen to harness the power of neuroscience.What would change in the world if we could all do that? To see, be with, feel, and deeply know each other…and ourselves. Robyn thinks everything could change. You can get your hands on all sorts of free resources at her website, including her podcast, The Baffling Behavior Show. Robyn is the author of Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies that Really Work.

Things you'll learn

What relational neuroscience and interpersonal neurobiology is
Why maladaptive behaviors are in fact adaptive responses to specific environments or experiences
What underlies nearly all struggles in children — dysregulation, disconnection, or feeling unsafe
How the brain operates in either connection mode or protection mode
Why Robyn created the metaphors for the 3 brain states: owl (calm), watchdog (vigilant), and possum (withdrawn)
How and why caring for our own regulated state helps us better support others

Resources mentioned

Free resources on Robyn Gobbel’s website
Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors: Brain-Body-Sensory Strategies That Really Work by Robyn Gobbel
The Baffling Behavior Show (Robyn’s podcast)
Being With (Robyn’s training program for professionals who work with parents
The Club (Robyn’s online community for parents)
Interpersonal Neurobiology, explained by Dr. Dan Siegel
Bonnie Badenoch
Dr. Dan Siegel
Dr. Tina Payne Bryson
Dr. Allan Schore
One Child: The True Story of a Tormented Six-Year-Old and the Brilliant Teacher Who Reached Out by Torey Hayden
Dr. Stephen Porges
Dr. Bruce Perry
Dr. Mona Delahooke

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TPP 141a: Therapist Debbie Steinberg Kuntz on Easing the Struggle for Bright and Quirky / 2e Kids

2 augusti 2024 | 46 min

TPP 395: Where Are We in the Neurodiversity Movement? with Marcus Soutra

30 juli 2024 | 43 min

The movement surrounding neurodivergence has evolved so much since I started Tilt Parenting, which I launched as “revolution for differently wired kids” back in 2016. I see changes everywhere — in the language we use, the parenting discussions we have, the deeper understanding of diagnostic criteria for things like autism and ADHD, the adaptations some companies are making to support their neurodivergent employees.

A few months ago, I grabbed a coffee with my friend Marcus Soutra, who until recently was the co-founder and president of Eye to Eye, a national organization dedicated to enhancing the educational journey and outcomes of neurodiverse youth, and we got into a deep conversation about all of these changes, and we thought, hey, why not have this conversation for the podcast to explore it further for the Tilt community. So here we are.

So that’s what this episode is. A thoughtful look at things like how the language and identity within the neurodiversity community has shifted, why community is a cornerstone of the movement, the ways privilege and access impacts a student’s ability to fully embrace neurodivergence, the potential pros and cons of neurodiversity content on social media apps like TikTok, self-identifying versus formal diagnoses, generational differences in experience, how we can help advance the movement in our everyday lives, and much more.

About Marcus Soutra

Marcus began his professional journey as a public school teacher before immersing himself in the grassroots movement of Eye to Eye and ultimately running it for nearly twenty years. Drawing from his experiences as both an educator and an individual with dyslexia and ADHD, Marcus deeply understands the challenges faced by students and teachers in navigating the educational landscape. His commitment to dismantling barriers and fostering confidence among diverse learners is evident in his work and advocacy efforts. Marcus has just embarked on a new venture with For The Good Consulting, where he leverages his expertise, network, and personal journey to support other organizations in scaling their missions.

Things you'll learn

How the language and identity within the neurodiversity movement has evolved towards embracing neurodivergence
Why community is a cornerstone of the neurodiversity movement
How privilege impacts the ability to embrace neurodivergence, particularly regarding access to resources
Where stigma surrounding neurodivergence persists, and how individuals are challenging stereotypes
Why early identification and support is crucial for the success of neurodivergent individuals in school and beyond
How parents can effectively advocate by supporting their child's self-advocacy and building supportive communities

Resources mentioned

For the Good Consulting (Marcus Soutra’s website)
Marcus Soutra on LinkedIn
Email Marcus
Eye to Eye website
Rise Act
Judy Singer
Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman
Understood
Dr. Mel Houser and All Brains Belong

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TPP 136a: KJ Dell'Antonia on How to Be a Happier Parent

26 juli 2024 | 49 min

TPP 394: Parent Lean-In — How Can I Help My Child Be More Flexible & Less Argumentative?

25 juli 2024 | 21 min

TPP 393: Dr. Mel Houser on Navigating the Healthcare System as a Neurodivergent Person

23 juli 2024 | 43 min

For some people, going to the doctor isn’t as simple as going to the doctor. In fact, for many parents of neurodivergent kids, and for many neurodivergent people themselves, interacting with healthcare systems requires researching, planning, and strategizing ahead of time in the hopes of a smooth appointment. Unfortunately, all too often, medical appointments are uncomfortable, stressful, and in some cases traumatic, because they environments and approaches to healthcare aren’t neurodivergent affirming.

As a result, traditional healthcare models often fail their neurodivergent patients, which is why today’s conversation is so important, as my guest is a doctor who is passionate about changing medical practices to be more neuroinclusive and community-based on this episode. Dr. Mel Houser is a family physician and Founder and Executive Director of All Brains Belong VT, a nonprofit organization in Montpelier, Vermont with a mission to support the health and belonging of people with all types of brains. All Brains Belong has pioneered an innovative model that integrates medical care with social connection, employment support, and community education.

In this conversation, Mel introduced me to the All Brains Belong Vermont, a revolutionary community-driven healthcare model that goes beyond medical care. We also talked about why the traditional healthcare system often fails neurodivergent patients and the serious consequences when they opt out of the medical system, the critical need for healthcare to address not just physical, but also social and emotional needs, and practical strategies on advocating for better healthcare, from understanding access needs and requesting accommodations to challenging the defaults of the current system.

About Dr. Mel Houser

Dr. Mel Houser is a family physician and Founder and Executive Director of All Brains Belong VT, a nonprofit organization in Montpelier, Vermont with a mission to support the health and belonging of people with all types of brains. All Brains Belong has pioneered an innovative model that integrates medical care with social connection, employment support, and community education.

Things you'll learn

How all Brains Belong Vermont has developed a community-driven healthcare model that integrates medical care with social connection and employment support
Why the traditional healthcare system often fails neurodivergent patients
What the consequences are when neurodivergent people opt out of the medical system
Why it’s critical that healthcare address patients' social and emotional needs
What universal design for healthcare is and how it can improve experiences for neurodivergent people
How we can all advocate for better healthcare by learning about access needs, requesting accommodations, and challenging system defaults

Resources mentioned

All Brains Belong (Dr. Mel Houser’s website)
All Brains Belong on Instagram
All Brains Belong on Facebook
Dr. Mel Houser on LinkedIn
All Brains Belong Resource, ALL THE THINGS (Free resource for navigating neurodivergent healthcare)
All Brains Belong Kid Connections (Free customized friend-making program for kids age 4-17 based on shared interests)
Everything is Connected to Everything: Improving the Healthcare of Autistic & ADHD Patients
Brain Club: (Weekly virtual community education program for older teens & adults)
Practical Strategies for Neuroinclusive Healthcare (webinar)
Milton’s ‘double Empathy Problem’: A Summary for Non-academics

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TPP 133a: College Admissions Expert Marisa Meddin on Application Strategies for Atypical Students

19 juli 2024 | 40 min

TPP 392: Cara Bean on Comics and Mental Health for Kids

16 juli 2024 | 42 min

As my guest said in the episode you’re about to listen to, you don’t have to be a mental health professional to have mental health conversations. In fact, I would say that talking about difficult mental health topics outside of medical settings is not just helpful — it’s necessary in that it both normalizes mental health challenges and reduces the stigma that’s often associated with such struggles.

Author and Illustrator Cara Bean also knows this to be true, and is committed to exploring these topics through her art, specifically comics. Cara sees comics as a powerful tool both for teens to learn about mental health, and for parents to lean on for important conversations about complex topics. Which is exactly why she wrote her new book, Here I Am, I Am Me: An Illustrated Guide to Mental Health.

Every chapter in this therapist-recommended book explores a different aspect of mental health, from the brain and the mind, to feelings and emotions. By portraying complex neuroscience concepts with a cast of illustrated characters, Cara offers an accessible, approachable understanding of what’s going on in the brain that empowers readers.

I really love Cara’s book and so wanted to have her on the show to talk about her process for writing it, and how we can use it to support kids going through hard stuff. So in this conversation, Cara explained the way she visualized thoughts and feelings, why she felt so strongly about including detailed brain science in her book, and the power of metaphors to explain the impacts and struggles of addiction, depression, anxiety, and suicidality, making these heavy topics more relatable and easier to understand.

About Cara Bean

Cara Bean is the author of Here I Am, I Am Me: An Illustrated Guide to Mental Health and Draw 500 Funny Faces and Features. She provides interactive workshops on creativity with people of all ages and backgrounds in various public forums. Cara is passionate about drawing and believes that the simple act of doodling on paper can lead to the investigation of complex ideas.

When she is not teaching, she makes comics that delve into poetic self introspection, playful storytelling and topics relevant to teens and teaching. Cara is currently working on comics projects that speak directly to kids and address mental health. Cara lives in Massachusetts with her husband and their dog Raisin.

Things you'll learn

How comics can provide an honest and accessible way to discuss complex issues
The benefits of visualizing thoughts and feelings through thought bubbles and metaphors for enhancing understanding
Why Cara felt so strongly about including detailed brain science in the book in order to foster understanding of emotional health and reactions
How Cara leaned into the power of metaphors to explain the impact and struggles of things like addiction, depression, anxiety, and suicidality
Why Cara wrote her book Here I Am, I Am Me for, and how different readers might approach engaging with it

Resources mentioned

Cara Bean’s website
Here I Am, I Am Me: An Illustrated Guide to Mental Health by Cara Bean
Draw 500 Funny Faces and Features by Cara Bean
Snakepit graphic pamphlet for adults
John Porcellino (King-Kat Comics)
The Breakthrough Years: A New Scientific Framework for Raising Thriving Teens by Ellen Galinsky
Ellen Galinsky Takes Us Through The Breakthrough Years and Raising Thriving Teens (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Graphic Medicine
Bill Waterson (Calvin & Hobbes)
The Addiction Inoculation: Raising Healthy Kids in a Culture of Dependence by Jessica Lahey
Jess Lahey on Her New Book The Addiction Inoculation (Tilt Parenting Podcast)

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TPP 130a: Julie Skolnick of With Understanding Comes Calm on Advocating for 2e Kids

12 juli 2024 | 46 min

TPP 391: Perry LaRoque on What Neurodivergent Students Need to Successfully Navigate College

9 juli 2024 | 45 min

If you have a child approaching their college years, this episode is packed with invaluable advice. I’m thrilled to have Dr. Perry LaRoque here to discuss what neurodivergent students need to successfully navigate college and his book Taking Flight: College for Students with Disabilities, Diverse Learners and Their Families.

So, what does a “successful college experience” actually mean? Perry broke it down for us, emphasizing the importance of the core values of awareness, regulation, expression, and dynamic determination. Perry also highlighted the essential skills for independence, such as frustration tolerance and the importance of seeking help when needed, and explored some of the unexpected challenges that students might face, from managing dorm life to maintaining proper sleep hygiene. We also discussed the various resources available on most college campuses and how students can maximize these support services and why meeting with professors can be a game-changer for a struggling student.

We all know that our kids are way more than the grades they get at school and this conversation is full of insights into how to approach the college experience more holistically. I hope you enjoy it!

About Dr. Perry LaRoque

Dr. LaRoque is the founder and president of Mansfield Hall. He earned his doctorate in special education from the University of Wisconsin and has served in a variety of leadership roles serving at-risk youth and people with disabilities. Before returning for his doctoral work, Dr. LaRoque worked in an assisted-living care facility for adults with intellectual disabilities and taught special education in several public schools. Upon returning for his doctoral studies, he continued his service in the field and served as a teacher and mental health specialist in a children’s residential psychiatric program at Meriter Hospital in Madison, WI.

In addition to writing, Dr. LaRoque is also the co-founder of the College STEPS Program, a non-profit with a mission of providing post-secondary education to students with developmental disabilities in various locations across the East Coast.

Dr. LaRoque has served as an Adjunct Professor at University of Wisconsin-Whitewater and University of New Hampshire and as an Assistant Professor at the State University of New York at Potsdam. He is published in several major education journals for his work on educating students with disabilities and has presented at numerous national and international conferences. Dr. LaRoque also served on the Vermont Special Education Advisory Council, which is an appointed position by the Governor. Most recently, he was an Associate Professor and the Special Education Program Director at Johnson State College in Vermont, where he was instrumental in creating the first dual-certification Elementary Education program in Vermont and also started the Think College Program at Johnson State College.

Things you'll learn

What a “successful college experience” actually means
The role that the values of awareness, regulation, expression, and dynamic determination play in a student’s ability to thrive at university
Why developing essential skills for independence, such as frustration tolerance and seeking help, is crucial for
What some of the challenging areas are for students that they may not be anticipating, including dorm life, sleep hygiene, and more
What types of resources are available on most college campuses and how students can take advantage of support services
Why meeting with professors can make all the difference for a struggling student

Resources mentioned

Dr. Perry Laroque’s website
Taking Flight: College for Students with Disabilities, Diverse Learners and Their Families by Perry Laroque, PhD
Mansfield Hall
Virtual Hall
Top College Consultants (Eric Endlich’s website)
Eric Endlich on Gap Year Experiences for Neurodivergent Students (Tilt Parenting podcast)
College Steps
Think College

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TPP 124a: Seth Perler on How Parents Can Help Their Kids Work Through Resistance

5 juli 2024 | 96 min

TPP 390: Parent Lean-In — How Can We Improve Communication & Get Better Support from a Developmental Pediatrician?

4 juli 2024 | 18 min

TPP 389: Ginger Whitson on Helping Kids Navigate Feeling Angry

2 juli 2024 | 42 min

Today, we're diving into a topic that will probably resonate with every parent: helping kids navigate the complex emotion of anger. And to explore this critical topic, I’m excited to welcome back the insightful Ginger Whitson, who will share her expertise while we discuss her book How to Be Angry: Strategies to Help Kids Express Anger Constructively.

We know that anger is a normal, natural, and physiological experience that all human beings are born with the capacity to feel. Yet many neurodivergent kids struggle with knowing how to experience and express their anger constructively, and they are in need of strategies and non-shaming guidance rather than what so often happens – they are punished for their behavior. So that’s what we get into in this episode — why anger in children can be so uncomfortable for adults to tolerate or respond to, strategies for teaching children alternatives to aggression, violence, or passive behavior, name assertiveness, the importance of adults stepping in as calm presences to help regulate a child's emotions and foster healthy coping mechanisms, and more.

By equipping our kids with these tools, we can support their emotional development and help them navigate their feelings more effectively. Enjoy this wisdom-packed episode with Ginger Whitson.

About Ginger Whitson

Signe Whitson (Ginger) is a licensed social worker and international educator on topics related to child & adolescent mental health. She is the author of seven books, including How to Be Angry: Strategies to Help Kids Express Anger Constructively. Ginger is also the Dean of Students at a K-8 school in northeastern Massachusetts and the COO of the Life Space Crisis Intervention Institute.

Things you'll learn

Why anger is a normal, natural, and physiological experience that all human beings are born with the capacity to feel
How the way individuals perceive events determines whether they feel anger, and why it varies from person to person
Why children who are aggressive or have difficulty managing their anger need adults to help them learn skills to express their anger constructively, rather than being punished for their behavior
Why being a calm presence for an angry child essential for helping them regulate their emotions and develop healthy coping mechanisms
How teaching children assertiveness skills and providing them with alternatives to aggression, violence, or passive behavior contributes to their emotional development

Resources mentioned

Signe Whitson’s website
How to Be Angry: Strategies to Help Kids Express Anger Constructively by Signe Whitson
Life Space Crisis Intervention Institute
8 Keys to End Bullying on Facebook
8 Keys to End Bullying: Strategies for Parents & Schools by Signe Whitson
The 8 Keys to End Bullying Activity Book for Kids & Tweens: Worksheets, Quizzes, Games, & Skills for Putting the Keys Into Action by Signe Whitson
Dr. Megan Anna Neff and Dr. Debra Brause on the Question: Does Traditional Therapy Work for Neurodivergent Kids? (Tilt Parenting episode)
Dr. Mona Delahooke on the Power of Brain-Body Parenting (Tilt Parenting episode)
Raising Good Humans with Mindful Mentor Mama Hunter Clarke-Fields (Tilt Parenting episode)
Dr. Lori Desautels on Rethinking Our Perceptions of Discipline in Schools and at Home (Tilt Parenting episode)

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TPP 123a: Seth Perler Talks to Asher About Resistance—Special Kid Episode

28 juni 2024 | 56 min

TPP 388: Yshai Boussi on Polyvagal and Supporting Connected Relationships with Teens

25 juni 2024 | 51 min

I’m extremely interested in Dr. Stephen Porges’ Polyvagal theory and the context it offers for understanding the nervous system experience of our kids. So I was especially interested when my guest’s book, Staying Connected With Your Teen: Polyvagal Parenting Strategies To Reduce Reactivity, Set Limits, and Build Authentic Connection, came onto my radar. Yshai Boussi is the founder of Portland Family Counseling, a therapy practice that specializes in helping children, adolescents, families, and parents. His focus is mentoring at-risk youth, working in residential treatment facilities, and leading intensive experiential workshops for at-risk youth, and he’s adept at applying polyvagal theory to helping parents foster deeper connection and reduce conflict.

In this conversation, we discussed how to build and maintain supportive relationships with teens, the crucial difference between "acceptance" and "agreement" when validating a teen's emotional experience, the power of co-regulation, and how a child's state of regulation affects their "story" and meaning-making about themselves and their experiences. A lot of great takeaways in this one, and I will admit to sending the rough cut to my husband Derin to listen to because I found so much of what we discussed highly relevant — I didn’t want to wait!

About Yshai Boussi

Yshai Boussi is a Licensed Professional Counselor and has been working with youth and families for over 20 years. He is the founder of Portland Family Counseling, a therapy practice that specializes in helping children, adolescents, families and parents. His experience includes mentoring at risk youth, working in residential treatment facilities and leading intensive experiential workshops for at risk youth. As a systems trained family therapist since 2003, Yshai has worked extensively in community mental health settings as well as private practice. In addition to working professionally, he and his wife Mariah (also a therapist) are proud parents of a 15 year-old daughter, 12 year-old son, and adult foster son. Yshai is the author of the newly released book, Staying Connected With Your Teen: Polyvagal Parenting Strategies To Reduce Reactivity, Set Limits, and Build Authentic Connection.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Why today’s teens feel so disconnected and lonely
How P.A.C.E. (Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity, Empathy) is the “attitude of connection” when it comes to engaging with teenagers
What the difference between “acceptance” and “agreement” is when it comes to validating a teen’s emotional experience
What the Polyvagal Theory is and awareness of its role can help us understand and better support struggling adolescents
Why a child's state of regulation in any given moment affects their “story” and meaning-making about themselves and their experiences
Why one of the most powerful things an adult can do for a teenager is to co-regulate

Resources mentioned for:

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TPP 132a: Director Marc Smolowitz on His Forthcoming Documentary, The G Word

21 juni 2024 | 50 min

TPP 387: Dr. Ross Greene on Using CPS (Collaborative and Proactive Solutions) with Very Young Kids

18 juni 2024 | 41 min

I refer to Dr. Ross Greene’s Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS) model in just about every talk I give to a parent community. Dr. Greene’s quote “Kids do well when they can” changed my life when I first read it about 15 years ago, and it remains as powerful today. So I was especially excited to welcome back to the show child psychologist and author Dr. Ross Greene to talk about how his problem solving model can be effectively used with very young children, even infants.

If you are new to CPS, I highly encourage you to go back and listen to our first conversation for the show, where we explored this approach in detail. But in the meantime, in this conversation we delved into why it’s crucial to shift from a compliance-focused approach to one of collaboration and understanding, even starting as early as age two. We also talked about how what we often label as a "difficult baby" is actually an infant struggling to meet our expectations, how using CPS can significantly enhance their well-being, and why we want to question the underlying reasons behind adult concerns — all of these are concept explored in the powerful new documentary, It's Never Too Early: CPS with Very Young Kids.

Ross W. Greene, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and the originator of the innovative, evidence-based approach called Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS), as described in his influential books The Explosive Child, Lost at School, Lost & Found, and Raising Human Beings. He also developed and executive produced the award-winning documentary film The Kids We Lose, released in 2018. Dr. Greene was on the faculty at Harvard Medical School for over 20 years, and is now founding director of the non-profit Lives in the Balance. He is also currently adjunct Professor in the Department of Psychology at Virginia Tech and adjunct Professor in the Faculty of Science at the University of Technology in Sydney, Australia. Dr. Greene has worked with several thousand kids with concerning behaviors and their caregivers, and he and his colleagues have overseen implementation and evaluation of the CPS model in countless schools, inpatient psychiatric units, and residential and juvenile detention facilities, with dramatic effect: significant reductions in recidivism, discipline referrals, detentions, suspensions, and use of restraint and seclusion.

Never Too Early: CPS with Young Kids (documentary)
The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children by Dr. Ross Greene
Lives in the Balance (Dr. Greene’s website)

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TPP 104a: Dr. Lori Baudino on the Power of Movement, Dance, and the Mind/Body Connection

14 juni 2024 | 40 min

This episode features a conversation with licensed clinical psychologist and board certified dance/movement therapist, Dr. Lori Baudino. Dr. Baudino provides therapeutic support to assist parents in understanding, handling, and accepting the challenges of parenting and the complexities of a developing child. She specializes in supporting children identified with special needs, including those with learning disabilities, early life traumas, academic/behavioral/emotional challenges, children on the Autism Spectrum, and with chronic acute illnesses.

In our conversation, we talk about the mind-body connection, and how teaching differently wired kids to tap into this relationship and understand their body’s unique language can be a valuable tool as they learn to regulate their emotions, better understand social communication, and more.

About Dr. Baudino: Dr. Lori Baudino has been a practicing clinician for over a decade. She received her doctorate in Clinical Psychology and Masters in Creative Arts Therapy – Dance/Movement Therapy, which identifies symptoms and creates ways to express psychological and emotional experiences through the mind/body connection, ultimately transforming words into action. Dr. Baudino is the National Clinical Spokesperson for The Andréa Rizzo Foundation. With their sole funding, she brought the first Dance/Movement Therapy Programs to UCLA Mattel Children’s Hospital and Children’s Hospital Los Angeles, where she provides bedside therapy to children with cancer, special needs and terminal illness. She has specialized in supervising, facilitating, and providing treatment for children with special needs and their families, and has worked in psychiatric hospitals and at rehabilitation centers for trauma, addiction, and pain management. Learn more at Dr. Lori Baudino.

Things You'll Learn From This Episode:

What “body knowledge” is and why it’s so important for differently wired kids
How the mind and body are connected
How to learn how to recognize the body language and movement profiles of rigidity, tantrums, and more
The ways in which body knowledge can support a child’s development
How we can learn to be tuned in to our child’s body language
How Dr. Baudino uses movement and physical play to help children better understand their emotions
What mind-body integration means and why this is what we’re going for

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TPP 386: Parent Lean-In — Debbie Reber on Recharging, Restoring, and Having "Me Time"

13 juni 2024 | 22 min

TPP 385: Angela Sizer and Maren Goerss on Homeschooling & Thinking Differently About Learning

11 juni 2024 | 48 min

Many parents of neurodivergent kids end up homeschooling at some point or another, for a period of time — some by choice, some because the school environment stopped being the right fit for our kids. If homeschooling is something you’ve considered, have done, or are currently doing,you are going to love this episode. I’m joined by Maren Goerss and Angela Sizer, two former teachers turned homeschooling parents and advocates, the hosts of the Homeschool Unrefined podcast, and the authors of the new book Think Differently About Learning: A Homeschool Where Parents and Children Thrive.

I loved this conversation where we explored homeschooling from many different angles, including considerations when homeschooling neurodivergent kids, the common barriers parents face, and why trusting the process and our children is crucial, yet challenging, in a homeschooling environment. We also talk about way viewing children as individuals worthy of respect and autonomy can revolutionize the learning experience, and how following our children's interests can lead to more meaningful and effective education.

Angela Sizer earned her Master’s in Teaching and taught in public schools for seven years. For a decade, she homeschooled her own children and loved watching them explore their passions and get excited about learning. These experiences strengthened Angela’s commitment to respecting how children learn and highlighted the role neurodivergence and mental health play in the process.

Maren Goerss has her Master’s in Education and taught elementary school for eight years. As part of a neurodivergent family, Maren sees learning differences as superpowers and leans into their strengths. After being a homeschool parent for years, Maren has become an ADHD parent and life coach.

Together, Angela and Maren created the podcast, Homeschool Unrefined, in 2016 to share their experience and knowledge as educators and homeschoolers while encouraging parents to notice how their children are always learning. Their podcast and book are a call to parents to reconsider their expectations of their children and themselves. They advocate for doing less, leaning into strengths, and enjoying the process.

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TPP 098a: Tom Ropelewski Talks About His Documentaries About 2e Kids

7 juni 2024 | 45 min

In this episode of the TILT Parenting Podcast, I’m excited to share with you a conversation I recently had with filmmaker Tom Ropelewski. Tom is the director of the highly acclaimed documentary 2e: Twice Exceptional, which came out in 2015, and he’s currently wrapping up post-production on a follow-up film, called 2e2: Teaching the Twice Exceptional.

Tom’s films center around Bridges Academy, a school for twice-exceptional kids in Studio City, CA that seems to have figured out the best way to meet the educational needs of these unique learners. In our conversation, Tom shares his story and personal why behind making these films, talks about the educational model at Bridges, describes how his films are helping to bring awareness of 2e kids’ into the mainstream, and gives us a sneak peek at his new film coming out later this year.

About Tom: Thomas Ropelewski has written and directed for both film and television. He wrote and made his feature directorial debut with the Orion Pictures comedy MADHOUSE, starring John Larroquette and Kirstie Alley. Other film credits include LOVERBOY, THE KISS, LOOK WHO’S TALKING NOW and THE NEXT BEST THING. His television work includes serving as writer/executive producer for three seasons of Paramount TV’s action/sci-‐fi series SEVEN DAYS. Recently, Ropelewski produced and directed the documentary, CHILD OF GIANTS: My Journey with Maynard Dixon and Dorothea Lange. The film has been screened at film festivals, colleges and museums around the world. It has also aired on KCET/San Francisco’s “Truly CA” documentary series. He currently resides in Berkeley, CA and is married to screenwriter Leslie Dixon (MRS. DOUBTFIRE, HAIRSPRAY, THE THOMAS CROWN AFFAIR, LIMITLESS).

Things You'll Learn From This Episode:

Tom’s personal why for creating documentaries
How Bridges Academy successfully supports 2e kids
The story behind Tom’s film, 2e: Twice Exceptional
The focus of Tom’s follow-up documentary, coming in 2018: 2e2: Teaching the Twice Exceptional
How Tom’s documentary helped to expand general awareness of 2e / twice-exceptional
Why it’s critical to use a strengths-based approach when educating 2e kids

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TPP 384: Ellen Galinsky Takes Us Inside The Breakthrough Years & Raising Thriving Teens

4 juni 2024 | 43 min

As I’m sure I’ve said on the show before, there’s no amount of money that could convince me to go back and relive my teenage years. But I do genuinely love and have so much empathy for kids in this phase of life and all that it entails, which is why I’m so happy to share today’s conversation on the show.

I had a chance to sit down with renowned parenting and childhood development expert Ellen Gallinsky, who has just published a phenomenal book called The Breakthrough Years: A New Scientific Framework for Raising Thriving Teens. Ellen spent nearly ten years talking with teenagers about what they think about, what they would like to know, how they feel, and perhaps most interestingly, what they would like adults to understand about them. She shares her discoveries in The Breakthrough Years, and through it, offers a paradigm-shifting comprehensive understanding of adolescence.

So in this conversation, we explore some what Ellen shares in her book, including why this phase of life is clouded by so many negative stereotypes and misconceptions, the pivotal brain development and skill acquisition happening during the teen years, the power of "shared solutions" problem-solving in fostering life and executive function skills, and what Ellen learned about teens' need for belonging and how we can support this essential aspect of their development.

About Ellen Galinsky

Ellen Galinsky is President of Families and Work Institute, President of the Work and Family Researchers Network (WFRN), and senior advisor at ACF at HHS. Previous jobs include Chief Science Officer at the Bezos Family Foundation and faculty at Bank Street College. Her life’s work revolves around identifying important societal questions, conducting research to seek answers, and turning the findings into action. Her research is focused on work-life, children’s development, youth voice, child-care, parent-professional relationship, and parental development. She’s the author of Mind in the Making and The Breakthrough Years. She’s also authored 90 books/reports and 360 articles.

Career highlights include serving as President of NAEYC, a fellow of the National Academy of Human Resources, a parent expert on the Mister Rogers Talks with Parents TV series, receiving a Distinguished Achievement Award from Vassar College and the 2022 Lifetime Achievement Award from WFRN.

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TPP 045a: 12-year-old Asher Answers Listeners' Questions (Special Kids' POV)

31 maj 2024 | 31 min

TPP 383: Kristina Kuzmic Debunks “Parenting Truths” That Keep Parents Stuck and in Crisis Mode

28 maj 2024 | 42 min

As parents, we want more than anything to help our kids thrive, to protect them from pain and harm, and avoid some, or maybe all, of the mistakes we made in our own lives. But what happens when our kids are struggling with really big, difficult, and scary, maybe even life-threatening, stuff? And none of our efforts to “fix” things are making a difference?

That’s the focus of today’s show and I am absolutely thrilled to be in conversation about it with Kristina Kuzmic, a mental health advocate, author, comedien and self-described “cheerleader for her fellow humans.” Kristina has just come out with a powerful new book I Can Fix This! (And Other Lies I’ve Told Myself while Parenting My Struggling Child), in which she writes about her complex journey of parenting a child struggling with mental health and substance abuse. She wrote it to help other struggling parents reject ideas that keep families stuck and, with her trademark authenticity and wisdom, dispel the lies we believe as parents.

This is SUCH a deep, raw, and generous conversation and it is exactly the conversation a parent feeling hopeless and overwhelmed in figuring out how to help their child needs to hear. Truly balm for the soul.

About Kristina Kuzmic

After immigrating to America from Croatia during the war in her homeland, and later facing more challenges (divorce, single parenting, poverty, mental health challenges), Kristina’s goal became clear: to be for others what she needed when she was at her lowest.

In 2011, when Oprah crowned Kristina the winner of Mark Burnett’s reality TV competition “Oprah’s Search for the Next TV Star,” Oprah said, “What is that THING…that’s so charming and charismatic and connected to the audience that makes you feel like, ‘I know her, I want to be her, I’m like her’… Kristina has all of that. She is an ‘IT PLUS’ girl… I wanna watch her!”

Since working with Oprah, Kristina has branched out on her own, creating videos about juggling all of life’s challenges, and encouraging her audience to prioritize their mental health. She has quickly become a viral sensation with 2.9 million Facebook followers, over 670,000 Instagram followers, and more than a billion video views.

Kristina’s first book, Hold On But Don’t Hold Still has been translated to seven languages. Her second book, I Can Fix This! (And Other Lies I’ve Told Myself while Parenting My Struggling Child) was released in May 2024.

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TPP 023a: TIlt Founder Debbie Reber Shares the Tilt Manifesto

24 maj 2024 | 29 min

When I launched the Tilt Parenting website in April 2016, I was excited to share with the world the Tilt Manifesto, a document outlining my vision for a more positive, more inclusive, and more all-around awesome experience for parents raising differently-wired kids, as well as my ideas for how we can get there together.

Because it’s important to us that the ideas behind the Tilt Manifesto are consumed and shared as broadly as possible, and because I know that the Manifesto is a kind of a long read and one thing we parents of atypical kids don’t necessarily have a lot of lying around is spare time, I decided to dedicate an entire episode of the podcast to the Manifesto. In it, I not only share my personal story of how I shifted my experience raising Asher from one where I felt overwhelmingly frustrated, stressed, and isolated to one full of acceptance, optimism, and possibility, but I lay out 10 ideas for things we can start doing today to shift the parenting paradigm to one that embraces our kids and our experience raising them.

So, if you haven’t had a chance to read the Manifesto yet, or you have read it but could use a fresh burst of inspiration, I invite you to sit back and have a listen, and join me in imagining what could be when we join together to shift the experience for families with differently-wired kids.

Things You'll Learn From This Episode:

Debbie Reber’s personal story of raising her twice-exceptional son
Why the current parenting paradigm is broken and outdated, especially for parents with atypical kids
How though our journey raising our differently-wired children is unique to us and who our children are, we are tied together through shared experiences of parenting outside the lines
The 10 things parents everywhere can start doing right now to take a lead in shifting the parenting paradigm

Resources Mentioned:

The TiLT Manifesto (download link for PDF)
Neurodiversity: What Does it Mean for 2015? by John Elder Robinson (Psychology Today)
Margaret Webb Life Coach

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TPP 382: Parent Lean-In — How Can I Scaffold a Teen With EF Challenges While Encouraging Autonomy?

23 maj 2024 | 22 min

TPP 381: Dr. Megan Anna Neff and Dr. Debra Brause on the Complex Relationship Between Traditional Therapeutic Practices & Neurodivergence

21 maj 2024 | 52 min

I’m SOOO excited to share this conversation with you, as it’s been a few months in the making and it’s on a topic I’m personally very interested in and I feel like not enough people are talking about — and that topic is, the intersection of traditional therapeutic modalities and neurodivergence.

Specifically, I wanted to examine how some therapies may not meet the unique needs of neurodivergent individuals and what it means for a therapist to be truly neurodivergent-affirming.

And I have two wonderful guests to get into it with me — author, parent of neurodivergent children and neurodivergent clinical psychologist Dr. Megan Anna Neff, who’s been on this show twice before, and Dr. Debra Brause, the parent of an autistic ADHDer, and a licensed psychologist and therapist who works from a neurodivergent-affirming stance.

And get into it we do. In this conversation, Megan Anna, Debra, and I explore what some limitations and challenges are for neurodivergent clients working with therapists who don’t understand their neurotypes, how therapeutic approaches can be adapted to provide sensory safety and center the client's experience and agency, why cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) may not be as effective for differently wired people, as well as the potential limitations of standard strategies like mindfulness and visualization as. Most importantly, we'll discuss the qualities to look for in a therapist who is truly neurodivergent affirming —what that means, and how it can make all the difference in a child's therapeutic journey. Megan Anna and Debra shared a lot of resources as well that you can go back to if you are a parent looking to get your child therapy.

Dr. Megan Anna Neff is the founder of Neurodivergent Insights where she creates education and wellness resources for neurodivergent adults, the co-host of the Divergent Conversations podcast, and the author of Self-Care For Autistic People, which is the book we talked about last time she was on the show. As a late-diagnosed AuDHDer , Dr. Neff applies their lived experiences to their professional focus. They are committed to broadening the mental health field's understanding of autism and ADHD beyond traditional stereotypes.

Dr. Debra Brause helps couples embrace who their children are, and provides support and guidance through this unique journey. Her professional training includes diagnostic assessment for learning disabilities at the UCLA Office for Students with Disabilities, and clinical work in community mental health settings including The Southern California Counseling Center and the Maple Counseling Center.

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TPP 012a: A Conversation with 11-year-old Asher About Managing & Tracking Screen Time

17 maj 2024 | 16 min

TPP 380: Dr. Marc D. Hauser on the Harm of Childhood Trauma and the Hope of Resiliency

14 maj 2024 | 49 min

Today, we're delving into a topic that's both profound and hopeful: the harm of childhood trauma and the incredible power of resilience. Joining me on the show is Dr. Marc D. Hauser, who's here to unravel these complex topics in a way that's accessible and empowering for all parents. Through his groundbreaking work, including his new book Vulnerable Minds: The Harms of Childhood Trauma and the Hope of Resiliency, which is what we’re diving into today, Marc brings scientific evidence about childhood trauma to a broader audience and sheds light on the pathways to healing and growth.

In this conversation, we explore what constitutes a traumatic experience and why neurodivergent children may be more vulnerable to their effects, as well as ACES, or Adverse Childhood Experiences, often misunderstood but profoundly influential in shaping a child's journey. Marc helps us understand their significance in the context of resilience.

About Marc Hauser

Marc Hauser is a scientist, educator, author, consultant and public speaker. Hauser’s scientific research, including over 300 published papers and seven books, has focused on how the brain evolves, develops, and is altered by damage and neurodevelopmental disorders, with an emphasis on the processes of learning and decision-making, as well as the impact of traumatic experiences on development. Hauser’s educational and consulting work has focused on the implementation of quantitative, brain-based methods for teachers, clinicians, and doctors working with children who have different disabilities, including especially those that result from a history of traumatic experiences.

Hauser earned a Bachelor of Science degree from Bucknell University, a PhD from UCLA and Post-doctoral fellowships from the University of Michigan, Rockefeller University, and University of California-Davis. From 1992-2011, he was a Professor at Harvard University. In 2013, he founded the company Risk-Eraser, dedicated to providing software and consulting to programs focusing on students in special education.

His most recent book Vulnerable Minds, published in March 2024 by Avery-Penguin-Random House Publishing, New York.

Things you'll learn from this episode

How Vulnerable Minds makes scientific evidence about childhood trauma accessible to a broader audience
How traumatic experiences are defined
The impact of trauma on neurodivergent children as well as ways in which these kids are more vulnerable to trauma
What it means for a school to be trauma-informed in action
What ACES are and how their assignment and meaning is frequently misinterpreted and misunderstood
The role of nature and nurture when it comes to whether other not an experience results in trauma or is met with resiliency

Resources mentioned for the Harm of Childhood Trauma and the Hope of Resiliency

Dr. Marc D. Hauser’s author website
Vulnerable Minds: The Harms of Childhood Trauma and the Hope of Resiliency by Dr. Marc D. Hauser
International Children’s Aid Network (iCAN)
Marc Hauser on X
Marc Hauser on Instagram
Marc Hauser on Linkedin
Marc Hauser on Facebook
Dr. Vincent Falliti
Stephen Porges and Polyvagal Theory
The Impact of Adverse Childhood Experiences on Health and Development in Young Children (National Institute of Health Study)
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk, MD
What Happened to You? Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing by Bruce Perry and Oprah Winfrey
Kelly Mahler on Understanding and Supporting Kids’ Interoception Experience (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Lori Desautels on Shifting Educational Systems Toward Post-Traumatic Growth (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Revelations in Education, Dr. Lori Desautel’s website
Intentional Neuroplasticity: Our Educational Journey Towards Post Traumatic Growth by Dr. Lori Desautels

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TPP 011a: Heidi Nord on the Challenges and Gifts of Dyslexia

10 maj 2024 | 42 min

TPP 379: Parent Lean-In — Should We Move to Give Our Kids Access to More Nature

9 maj 2024 | 18 min

TPP 378: Julie Bogart on Helping Kids Become Critical Thinkers

7 maj 2024 | 48 min

In a world overflowing with information and complexity, critical thinking isn't just a useful skill; it's an essential life raft. From navigating complex interactions to making informed decisions, our children need the ability to think critically now more than ever. But what does that really mean? And how can we as parents nurture this skill in our children? I invited author and Brave Writer founder Julie Bogart back to the show to help us answer these questions and to talk about her new book, Becoming a Critical Thinker: A Workbook to Help Students Think Well in an Age of Disinformation.

In this conversation, we got into so many things. And as you’ll hear, I could have talked to Julie for hours. But for this episode, you can expect to hear Julie’s thoughts on how and why we can foster critical thinking in our children, how considering multiple perspectives and incorporating diverse viewpoints leads to better problem-solving, what parents can do to encourage self-awareness, open-mindedness, and curiosity, and much more.

About Julie Bogart

Julie Bogart is known for her common sense parenting and education advice. She’s the author of the beloved book, The Brave Learner, which has brought joy and freedom to countless home educators. Her new book, Raising Critical Thinkers, offers parents a lifeline in navigating the complex digital world our kids are confronting.

Julie’s also the creator of the award-winning, innovative online writing program called Brave Writer, now 22 years old, serving 191 countries. She home educated her five children, who are globe-trotting adults. Today, Julie lives in Cincinnati, Ohio, and can be found sipping a cup of tea while planning her next visit to one of her lifelong-learning kids.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Why critical thinking is essential to navigate complex issues and make informed decisions
How considering multiple perspectives and incorporating diverse viewpoints leads to better problem-solving and policy-making
How parents can play a crucial role in fostering critical thinking skills in their children by encouraging self-awareness, open-mindedness, and curiosity
Why traditional models of authority and obedience in parenting are being replaced by a more collaborative and respectful approach that values children's reasoning and autonomy
How the Becoming a Critical Thinker workbook helps students develop skills such as vetting sources, analyzing data, and considering multiple perspectives
Why engaging in perspective-taking and tolerance can help neurodivergent kids deconstruct ideas and accept other points of view

Resources mentioned for Helping Kids Become Critical Thinkers

Julie Bogart’s Brave Writer website
Julie Bogart’s Blog at Brave Writer
Brave Writer Writing Blitz
Brave Writer Podcast
Becoming a Critical Thinker: A Workbook to Help Students Think Well in an Age of Disinformation by Julie Bogart
Raising Critical Thinkers: A Parents’ Guide to Growing Wise Kids in the Digital Age by Julie Bogart
The Brave Learner: Finding Everyday Magic in Homeschool, Learning, and Life by Julie Bogart
Julie Bogart on Instagram
Julie Bogart on Facebook
Julie Bogart on Twitter
Julie Bogart on Moving Through Writing Resistance for Differently Wired Kids (Tilt Parenting podcast)
Herman Kahn
Noam Chomsky
The Vow (HBO Documentary series)
Killing Us Softly documentary (Jean Kilborne)

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TPP 007a: An Interview with Founder Debbie Reber About Her Vision and Plans for TIlt

3 maj 2024 | 38 min

TPP 377: Parent Lean-In — How to Ethically Respond When a Child is Being Physically Aggressive

2 maj 2024 | 22 min

TPP 376: Kelley Coleman on Everything No One Tells You About Parenting a Disabled Child

30 april 2024 | 44 min

Have you ever felt paralyzed by all the “stuff” involved in charting a path and advocating for your child? I’m sure I’m not the only one who’s put off calling the insurance company or establishing a relationship with a new health care provider because at the time it felt too overwhelming and daunting. But what if there was a resource that provided everything parents and caregivers need to know about navigating all the complex, but critical, aspects of raising a neurodivergent child? How great would that be?

I’ve got some good news for you! Today’s guest, Kelley Coleman, has created that resource — it’s her brand new book called Everything No One Tells You About Parenting a Disabled Child: Your Guide to the Essential Systems, Services, and Supports. Kelley’s book draws upon over a decade of experience, including her own experience parenting a child with multiple disabilities. It’s an honest, relatable, actionable roadmap to the practicalities of parenting a disabled child, featuring personal stories, expert interviews, and the foundational information parents need to know about topics including diagnosis, school, doctors, insurance, financial planning, disability rights, and what life looks like as a parent caregiver.

In this conversation, Kelley, a feature film development executive turned author and advocate for parent caregivers and individuals with disabilities, shares so many insights from her book, including the difference between being a parent and being a caregiver, strategies for navigating Insurance, working with medical teams, and other daunting systems, future care planning, and so much more.

Seriously, Kelley has created SUCH an incredible resource in this book, because she’s researched, and mapped, and made simple and doable the key things and tools parents need to stop wasting unnecessary time, money, and stress as they navigate this journey.

Enjoy the episode, and please share it with others who would benefit from Kelley’s insight and positive approach so that they can spend less time filling out forms, and more time loving their children exactly as they are.

About Kelley Coleman

Kelley Coleman is a feature film development executive turned author and advocate for parent caregivers and individuals with disabilities. Her book Everything No One Tells You About Parenting a Disabled Child: Your Guide to the Essential Systems, Services, and Supports draws upon over a decade of experience, including her own experience parenting a child with multiple disabilities. Kelley lives in Los Angeles with her husband, two boys, and her son’s trusty service dog.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What the difference is between parenting and caregiving and why it’s an important distinction to make
What some of the most common challenge nondisabled parents face embracing disability in their children
Why it’s critical that parents and caregivers have access to practical information (and why it’s so hard to find)
Strategies for navigating Insurance, working with medical teams, and other daunting systems
Why financial planning is so important and how to get started
The benefits of connecting with experts and disabled leaders in the disability community

Resources mentioned for Everything No One Tells You About Parenting a Disabled Child

Kelley Coleman’s website
Everything No One Tells You About Parenting a Disabled Child: Your Guide to the Essential Systems, Services, and Supports by Kelley Coleman
Kelley Coleman on Instagram
Kelley Coleman on Facebook
Emily Ladau’s website
Demystifying Disability: What to Know, What to Say, and How to be an Ally by Emily Ladau
Activist Emily Ladau on Demystifying Disability (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Judy Heumann (disability rights activist)
Rebecca Cokley (disability rights activist)
After Revealing He Couldn’t Read, Former Convict Is Inspiring Others on TikTok — Here’s How (People Magazine article about Oliver James)

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TPP 149a: Educator and Author Kelly Hirt Shares Strategies for "Boosting" Twice-Exceptional / 2e Kids

26 april 2024 | 38 min

TPP 375: Parent Lean-In — How Can We Go on Vacation When it Throws Off My Child's Need for Routine

25 april 2024 | 21 min

TPP 374: Penn & Kim Holderness Talk About How ADHD is Awesome in Love & in Life

23 april 2024 | 45 min

I’ve been a longtime fan of Kim and Penn Holderness, who I’ve had a parasocial relationship with for years as I love to consume and share their funny music videos, vlogs, and skits. And in more recent years, it’s exciting to see them talking openly and with humor and authenticity about Penn’s ADHD and how together, Kim and Penn navigate their marriage and raising kids in their mixed neurotype household.

All that say, I loved having a chance to sit down with Kim and Penn to talk about their brand new book, out next week, called ADHD is Awesome: A Guide to (Mostly) Thriving with ADHD, which they wrote because they are on a mission to reboot how we think about ADHD by taking us inside their ADHD world, and all highs, lows, and moments in between. I think what I loved about their book, and this conversation, the most is that Kim and Penn are real and open about how beautiful, and yes, messy, it can be to navigate family life as a person with ADHD or as someone married to an ADHDer. And so in today’s conversation, that’s what we hear about — how Penn has learned to hack himself to manage his ADHD-related challenges, the ways in which ADHD has enriched their family life, how Kim has reframed her thinking and approach to support Penn’s executive function challenges and be an “ADHD whisperer” while also taking care of her own emotional and mental well-being.

After listening to this episode, I highly recommend you go to their Instagram or YouTube and check out their content. Their first book together, Everybody Fights, about how couples can fight better and end your arguments feeling closer, more loved, and better understood, came out in 2021. The book we’re talking about today, ADHD is Awesome, comes out April 30.

About Kim and Penn Holderness

Kim and Penn Holderness have been married for sixteen years. For seven of those years, they have chronicled their marriage and their family with funny music videos, vlogs, skits, and a podcast. Their videos have resulted in over a billion views and 4.5 million followers across social media.

Penn and Kim honed their storytelling skills with twenty-five combined years in the TV news business. Today, they own their own company, Holderness Family Productions, where Kim is Chief Executive Officer and Penn is Chief Creative Officer.

As well as creating content for their channels, they also work alongside brands and agencies to shape product launches and marketing campaigns. Their book about improving communication in marriage was released March 30, 2021.

Penn and Kim live in Raleigh, North Carolina, with their children, Lola and Penn Charles, and fluffy dog, Sunny.

Things you'll learn from this episode

How Penn navigated being diagnosed with ADHD in college and how that impacted his understanding of self and identity
The power of “operation mindset shift” and reframing ADHD traits as strengths
How Kim came to understand how Penn’s brain wiring impacted his executive functioning
How Penn has “hacked” himself to manage his ADHD symptoms and challenges
The power of empathy, comfort, and connection when navigating a mixed neurotypes relationship
What some of the “upsides” are for friends and family members of people with ADHD

Resources mentioned for How ADHD is Awesome in Love & in Life

The Holderness Family
ADHD is Awesome: A Guide to (Mostly) Thriving with ADHD by Kim and Penn Holderness
The Holderness Family Podcast
ADHD is Awesome Book Trailer (YouTube)
Everybody Fights: So Why Not Get Better At It? by Kim and Penn Holderness
Dr. Ned Hallowell
Dr. Ned Hallowell on How Parents Can Best Support Their Children with ADHD (Tilt Parenting podcast)
Dr. Emily King
Learn with Dr. Emily (podcast)
ADHD 2.0: New Science and Essential Strategies for Thriving with Distraction - from Childhood Through Adulthood by Dr. Ned Hallowell
Driven to Distraction: Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder from Childhood through Adulthood by Dr. Ned Hallowell and Dr. John Ratey

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TPP 143a: Tilt Founder Debbie Reber Shares Her Best Self-Care Strategies

19 april 2024 | 47 min

TPP 373: Parent Lean-In — How Can I Prepare My Child for the Transition to Middle School?

18 april 2024 | 22 min

TPP 372: Dr. Megan Anna Neff on Self-Care for Autistic People

16 april 2024 | 36 min

I’ve done one episode just about self-care for this show — it’s a solocast from five years ago where I shared twelve strategies and ideas for creating a sustainable, doable self-care practice. I’ll have a link to that in the show notes page for this episode.

Today’s episode is about self-care, too, but the focus is on self-care for autistic people, and joining me is return guest Dr. Megan Anna Neff of Neurodivergent Insights. Megan Anna has just published a brand new book called Self-Care for Autistic People: 100+ Ways to Recharge, De-Stress, and Unmask! which she wrote to help autistic people accept themselves, destigmatize autism, find community, and take care of physical and mental health.

I really enjoyed going inside this book because, as we discuss, self-care is so much more than what it appears to be on the surface. Megan Anna considers self-care to be a collective effort that includes the well-being of the community, a framework that really resonated with me. So we talk about that, along with other ideas from Megan Anna’s book, including how internalized ableism can hinder self-care, considerations for navigating self-care for individuals with PDA, and insights into co-regulation, sensory considerations, and how advocacy and accommodations in the workplace can also be forms of self-care.

About Dr. Megan Anna Neff

Dr. Megan Anna Neff (she/they) is a neurodivergent Clinical Psychologist and founder of Neurodivergent Insights where she creates education and wellness resources for neurodivergent adults. Additionally, she is co-host of the Divergent Conversations podcast.

As a late-diagnosed AuDHDer (Autistic ADHD), Dr. Neff applies their lived experiences from a cross-neurotype marriage and parenting neurodivergent children to their professional focus. They are committed to broadening the mental health field's understanding of autism and ADHD beyond traditional stereotypes. This personal-professional blend enriches their work and advocacy within neurodiversity.

Dr. Neff is the author of Self-Care for Autistic People and a forthcoming book on Autistic Burnout. Additionally, she has published in several peer-reviewed journals on topics ranging from neurodivergence, place attachment, relational psychoanalysis, social psychology, and integration of spirituality into psychotherapy.

Passionate about distilling complex research into visually accessible formats, she translates research into visual pixels which you can find on her website, Instagram, and digital workbooks. Additionally, Dr. Neff is passionate about community building and creating digital communities by and for neurodivergent individuals.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Why self-care should be approached with self-attunement and an understanding of one's own needs
Why self-care is a collective effort that includes the well-being of the community
How internalized ableism can hinder self-care and why it’s important to address it
Ideas for navigating self-care for individuals with PDA regarding autonomy, co-regulation, and sensory considerations
Ways to practice self-care in the workplace, including self-disclosure, documentation, and setting realistic expectations

Resources mentioned for Self-Care for Autistic People

Dr. Megan Anna Neff’s website
Self-Care For Autistic People by Dr. Megan Anna Neff
* A special bonus offer for Tilt Parenting community *
Divergent Conversations Podcast
Neurodivergent Insights on Instagram
Neurodivergent Insights on Facebook
Dr. Megan Anna Neff on LinkedIn
Dr. Megan Anna Neff’s Link in Bio
Dr. Megan Anna Neff on Diagnoses and Misdiagnoses (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Sarah Wayland
Is This Autism? A Guide for Clinicians and Everyone Else by Dr. Donna Henderson and Dr. Sarah Wayland

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TPP 134a: How Fathers Can Be The Dad Their Differently Wired Child Needs, With Jeremy Schneider

12 april 2024 | 45 min

TPP 371 — Parent Lean-In: What Should I Do When My Young Adult Isn't Taking Steps to Reach His Goals?

11 april 2024 | 20 min

TPP 370: Dr. Eric Endlich on Gap Years Experiences for Neurodivergent Young Adults

9 april 2024 | 43 min

As many listeners know, Asher is doing a gap year this year, having graduated from high school last summer. And so I’ve been pretty immersed in this topic, but I’ve been getting so many questions from families who want to know more about navigating gap year. And in fact, I’ve been hearing more and more about the benefits of gap years for ALL students, not only neurodivergent kids, especially since the pandemic. The questions I get the most are what exactly is a gap year? How is a parent to know if their child would benefit from taking a gap year? How should a student be spending their time between high school and college, if that is indeed the next step for them? And where should I start when it comes to finding and vetting the best programs and possibilities for a child taking this year between high school and what comes next?

To explore this topic, I invited Dr. Eric Endlich, a clinical psychologist, founder of Top College Consultants, and expert who guides students with learning differences and mental health challenges through the college application process. I asked Eric how we can determine as parents whether our kid is ready or not for college, what types of gap year experiences for neurodivergent students exist, and how universities perceive a student taking a gap year when considering their application. We also talked about how to find the right program for your student and how to do some voting to make sure it’s the right fit.

As you’ll hear from the episode, Eric has a wealth of knowledge about ways to navigate the sometimes lengthy and unique runway for neurodivergent students. I hope you enjoy this conversation!

About Dr. Eric Endlich

Eric Endlich, Ph.D., clinical psychologist and founder of Top College Consultants, guides students with learning differences and mental health challenges through the college application process. Dr. Endlich has served on the Learning Differences/Neurodiversity and DEI Committees of the Independent Educational Consultants Association (IECA), and was honored by IECA with a “Making a Difference” award for contributions such as a database of neurodiversity-friendly colleges. He co-teaches a course, Working with Students with Learning Differences, and co-manages a 16,000-member Facebook group for parents of college-bound neurodivergent students. A national presenter, researcher and professional writer, Dr.Endlich has been interviewed by various media including Forbes, Money magazine, College Confidential and U.S. News & World Report.

Things you'll learn

The key components when considering a student’s college readiness, including academic capabilities and independence skills
What types of gap year experiences are possible (from formal programs to DIY)
How colleges perceive gap years, as well as whether to apply to universities before or during a gap year
A look at the types of formal gap year programs specifically designed to support neurodivergent students
Strategies and insights for researching and vetting gap year programs

Resources mentioned

Top College Consultants
Top College Consultants' Articles
Neurodiversity in College (Top College Consultants' Resource)
Top College Consultants on Facebook
Young Scholars Academy
The Dorm (therapeutic treatment center for young adults)
Parents of College Bound Students with Learning Disabilities, ADHD and ASD (Facebook group)
Dynamy Gap Year program
Mansfield Hall (post-graduate program in Connecticut)
Mitchell College
Landmark College Summer Program
Middlebridge School (post-graduate program in Rhode Island)
SOAR Gap Year program
Semester Off Program (Massachusetts)
Franklin Academy (post-graduate program in Connecticut)
Winston Transitions (non-residential post-graduate program in New York)
CIP Transition Program at Berkeley (California)

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TPP 126a: Deb Douglas on Self-Advocacy for Gifted Learners

5 april 2024 | 49 min

TPP 369: Parent Lean-In — Help! My Child Struggles with Games and Competition

4 april 2024 | 20 min

TPP 368: Autum Romano on the Safe and Sound Protocol & Nervous System Regulation

2 april 2024 | 43 min

If I told you there was a passive intervention that could help your kiddo and your family increase the window of tolerance in the way the world is received, would you believe me? Well today, I’m sharing a conversation on exactly that — it’s called the Safe and Sound Protocol, and it’s essentially a therapeutic listening program designed to support emotional regulation and neuroception. I was first introduced to SSP by a therapist our family was working with and I wanted to know more about how it works, and how it can support kids who have what Dr. Mona Delahooke refers to as a less-sturdy nervous system platform.

I reached out to educator, author, and bodyworker Autum Romano to join me for this conversation, as she is passionate about nervous system regulation as a foundation for transformative whole health. Autum, who is also neurodivergent and twice-exceptional, is known for her intuitive healing approach. She recently collaborated with Dr. Porges on a case study for his upcoming book on the benefits of the Safe and Sound Protocol, and last year published her own childrens’ book called Body Wisdom and the Polyvagal Theory, which introduces polyvagal theory in an easy-to-understand way.

In this conversation, we talk about what neuroception is and why it’s critical to helping our kids develop a felt sense of safety, as well as what the Safe and Sound Protocol actually is. She explains how it essentially re-patterns the brain’s nervous system through listening, creates a safe space for brain and body integration, and leads to impactful, long-lasting results.

This is a fascinating conversation about polyvagal, neuroception, and nervous system support that definitely left me wanting to know, and experience, more. I hope you get a lot out of it.

About Autum Romano

Autum Romano is an educator, author, and bodyworker who’s passionate about nervous system regulation as a foundation for transformative whole health. Autum holds certifications as a Neuromuscular Therapist, Licensed Massage Therapist, Safe and Sound Protocol Provider, Craniosacral Therapist, Reiki Master, and Certified Trauma Informed Care Provider with over 27 years in the field and more than 25,000 massages given. Known for her intuitive healing approach, Autum is also neurodivergent and twice-exceptional. She recently collaborated with Dr. Porges on a case study for his upcoming book on the benefits of the Safe and Sound Protocol.

In collaboration with her son, Autum has authored a children’s book titled Body Wisdom and the Polyvagal Theory. Crafted for pre-readers and individuals with dyslexia, their goal is to democratize the Polyvagal Theory, viewing it as a user manual for the body. They aim to make this valuable knowledge accessible to a diverse and inclusive audience.

Things you'll learn:

How neuroception works to detect safety or threat without conscious awareness
The ways in which body work can help individuals understand their neuroception
What the Safe and Sound Protocol (SSP) is and how it stimulates the ventral branch of the vagus nerve through music
The benefits of going through the SSP on our kids’ window of tolerance and nervous system
How Autum’s book Body Wisdom and the Polyvagal Theory introduces polyvagal theory to kids of all ages

Resources mentioned:

Autum Romano’s website
Autum on Instagram
Autum on Facebook
Body Wisdom and the Polyvagal Theory by Autum Romano
Dr. Stephen Porges and Polyvagal Theory
Safe and Sound Protocol
My Grandmother's Hands: Racialized Trauma and the Pathway to Mending Our Hearts and Bodies by Resmaa Menakem
Deb Dana’s website, Rhythm of Regulation
Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory by Deb Dana
Deb Dana on Befriending Our Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
To receive 10 percent of Autum’s Safe & Sound Protocol Home Program, use the code TILT

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TPP 121a: A Conversation with Elisheva Schwartz of The Dyslexia Quest

29 mars 2024 | 44 min

In this week’s episode, I’m talking with Elisheva Schwartz, a dyslexia researcher, mother, wife, intelligence re-definer, and host of The Dyslexia Quest podcast. Elisheva is on a mission to empower the dyslexic community to fully understand both the strengths and the difficulties of the processing style.

If you have a child with learning differences like dyslexia, this is a must-listen-to episode, as Elisheva gets personal and shares her story of her own childhood of struggling to reconcile her passion for learning with repeatedly being told she was learning disabled. Luckily for the rest of us, Elisheva has channeled the pain of her own childhood journey to helping families raising kids with learning differences help their kids feel empowered and confident about who they are, while also knowing how to advocate for them in school. I hope you enjoy our conversation.

About Elisheva: Elisheva Schwartz is a dyslexia researcher, mother, wife, intelligence re-definer, and podcast host. She’s on a mission to decode the dyslexic mind and empower the dyslexic community to fully understand both the strengths and the difficulties of the processing style.

Both her academic background in Cognitive Science and Education, as well as her own personal experiences with dyslexia, allows Elisheva to draw on a unique blend of both the personal and scientific. Elisheva often writes about dyslexia, cognition, learning, creativity and intelligence, and maintains an occasional column at The Creativity Post.

Additionally, Elisheva often speaks at universities and conferences, with some of her latest speaking engagement including The International Dyslexia Association (Panel) and University of Philadelphia.

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

Elisheva’s personal why for creating The Dyslexia Quest
What the biggest roadblocks are for kids with learning differences like dyslexia in a traditional school setting
What reframing dyslexia to view it through a strengths-based lens looks like
How parents can help kids feel more positive about their learning differences
How parents can work with schools to get them the support their child needs
Elisheva’s advice on how parents can best approach their child’s learning differences and support their child
What parents can expert in their journey of supporting their kids
What the gifts of dyslexia are

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

The Dyslexia Quest Podcast
Elisheva on Instagram
Elisheva on Facebook
The Dyslexic Advantage: Unlocking the Hidden Potential of the Dyslexic Brain by Brock L. Eide
Dyslexic Advantage (website)

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TPP 367: Dr. Aliza Pressman on the 5 Principles of Parenting

26 mars 2024 | 40 min

I can’t tell you how many parenting books I’ve read, but I can tell you that sometimes when I finish reading a parenting book, I feel a sense of loss or stress or as if I'm somehow behind and need to backtrack to get things going in the right direction. So when I come across a book that feels supportive and accessible, I’m always happy to share it with you. And that is definitely the case with The 5 Principles of Parenting: Your Essential Guide to Raising Good Humans, the new book by friend of the pod Dr. Aliza Pressman.

I think what I love so much about Aliza’s work is that she compassionately reminds us that there’s no one “right” way to raise good humans. Instead, in her book she helps parents charge a manageable course for raising good humans that’s in alignment with our own values and our children’s unique temperaments. The five principles outlined in her book that she walks through with us in this conversation – Relationship, Reflection, Regulation, Rules, and Repair – can be used to get things right often enough, because there’s not getting a perfect score in parenting. Lots of great reminders in this conversation, and the one I appreciated the most is that even though what it takes to raise good humans may sound simple, that doesn't mean that it’s easy, or that it’s not going to feel messy. In fact, it’s most definitely going to feel messy, and that’s okay!

About Dr. Aliza Pressman

Dr. Aliza Pressman is a developmental psychologist with nearly two decades of experience working with families and the health care providers who care for them. Aliza is an assistant clinical professor in the Department of Pediatrics in the Division of Behavioral and Developmental Health at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai Hospital where she is cofounding director of The Mount Sinai Parenting Center. Aliza is also the host of the award-winning podcast, Raising Good Humans. She holds a BA from Dartmouth College, an MA in Risk, Resilience, and Prevention from the Department of Human Development at Teacher’s College and her PhD in developmental psychology from Columbia University Graduate School of Arts and Sciences. Aliza also holds a teaching certificate in mindfulness and meditation from The Greater Good Science Center at the University of California at Berkeley. Aliza is the mother of two teenagers.

Things you'll learn from this episode

The definition of a 'good human' is subjective and varies from family to family
The five principles of parenting are relationship, reflection, regulation, rules, and repair
Resilience is an important aspect of parenting, especially for neurodivergent children
The principles can be applied to various parenting situations, including sibling conflicts
Parenting is supposed to be messy — there is no one-size-fits-all approach

Resources mentioned for the 5 Principles of Parenting

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TPP 119a: Adrianne Meldrum on Dealing with Math Struggles Faced by Differently Wired Kids

22 mars 2024 | 51 min

TPP 366: Natasha Daniels on Helping Kids Crush OCD

19 mars 2024 | 38 min

It’s been a while since we’ve talked about OCD on the show, so when anxiety and OCD expert Natasha Daniels reached out about her new book, Crushing OCD Workbook for Kids, I was excited to get into it all and pulled together a lot of questions ready to make this conversation as helpful as possible for our community.

You may know Natasha from her popular AT Survival Parenting podcast, or some of her other books like Anxiety Sucks: A Teen Survival Guide, How to Parent Your Anxious Toddler, Social Skills Activities for Kids, andIt’s Brave to Be Kind, or from her past visit to this show. She has more than two decades of experience as a child therapist, and combines her clinical expertise with her lived experience in her work, as she’s raising her three kids with anxiety and OCD. You also may have seen her work featured in places like Huffington Post, Scary Mommy, PsychCentral, The Child Mind Institute and The Mighty.

So for today’s conversation, I wanted to do a deep dive into OCD and learn more about what it is, how it manifests, signs of OCD that might be missed by parents, how to tease out when something is OCD versus anxiety or ADHD or other types of neurodivergence, and lastly, how parents can support their children if they have OCD. And of course, Natasha shared some insights and tools from her new Crushing OCD Workbook for Kids, which is truly a powerful, and easy-to-use resource for any child navigating OCD and the challenges that come along with it.

About Natasha Daniels

Natasha Daniels is an anxiety and OCD child therapist with over two decades of experience. She combines both her clinical expertise with her lived experience, raising her own three kids with anxiety and OCD.

She is the author of several books including Anxiety Sucks: A Teen Survival Guide, How to Parent Your Anxious Toddler, Social Skills Activities for Kids, It’s Brave to Be Kind, The Grief Rock, and Crushing OCD Workbook for Kids.

She is the creator of the website AT Parenting Survival, As well as the host of the show AT Parenting Survival Podcast and the Youtube channel, Ask the Child Therapist. Her work has been featured in various places including Huffington Post, Scary Mommy, PsychCentral, The Child Mind Institute and The Mighty.

Things you'll learn from this episode

How OCD begins and manifests in children
What intrusive thoughts or feelings are and how they can lead to compulsions
Why OCD is often misdiagnosed as ADHD, anxiety, or self-harm and why it’s important to receive an accurate diagnosis
What exposure response prevention (ERP) therapy is and how it supports individuals with OCD
What OCD with support looks like over time with helpful treatment and the development of coping skills
The importance of early intervention in supporting children with OCD
How Natasha’s book Crushing OCD Workbook for Kids provides evidence-based tools and strategies to help children understand and manage their OCD

Resources mentioned for Unmasking Autism

Natasha Daniels’ website
Crushing OCD Workbook for Kids: 50 Fun Activities to Overcome OCD With CBT and Exposures by Natasha Daniels
Natasha Daniels Talks about Anxiety and OCD in Kids (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
AT Parenting Podcast
AT Parenting Survival Online Courses
AT Parenting survival on Instagram
AT Parenting survival on Youtube
Filmmaker Chris Baier Helps Families Get Unstuck from OCD (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
UNSTUCK: An OCD Kids Movie (Available with Spanish, French, Russian, Greek, Portuguese subtitles and an audio description)
Help for Childhood Anxiety and OCD with Dr. Eli Leibowitz (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Space Treatment website

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TPP 118a: Michelle Gale Talks About Mindful Parenting in a Messy World

15 mars 2024 | 45 min

TPP 365: Dr. Alok Kanojia Explains How to Raise Healthy Gamers

12 mars 2024 | 44 min

I married a gamer and my 19-year-old is also a gamer, so I’m no stranger to the reality of video games being a significant part of daily life. But where’s the line between healthy gaming and unhealthy gaming? How much gaming is too much? And when does a gaming habit evolve into gaming addiction?

These are some of the questions regarding screen time that I hear from many parents, and they highlight some of the ongoing challenges families face in raising children who can be responsible tech users and whose screen use and gaming doesn’t interfere with their lives in a way that can be harmful or keep them stuck.

So when I learned of the new book How to Raise a Healthy Gamer: End Power Struggles, Break Bad Screen Habits, and Transform Your Relationship with Your Kids by Dr. Alok Kanojia, I knew I wanted to invite him onto the show to talk about all things gaming with us.

In this conversation, we talked about how we as parents can know whether our child is addicted to video games or not, why screen time limits and restricting gaming time are at odds with the goal of raising a healthy gamer, and how to shift to a holistic approach that considers overall well-being and goal-setting. We also talked about why children with ADHD are more susceptible to addictive behaviors surrounding gaming and how to raise healthy gamers from a young age.

A packed episode that is a must-listen for any parenting whose child interacts with online or video games. Good, good stuff.

About Dr. Alok Kanojia

Dr. Alok Kanojia is a Harvard-trained psychiatrist specializing in the intersection of technology x mental health. Also known as ”Dr. K” to millions of people on the internet, Dr.Kanojia is the cofounder of Healthy Gamer, a mental health platform that serves the digital generation. He has inspired millions of people with online content while overseeing the mental health coaching of thousands of young people. He is widely regarded as the foremost expert on video game addiction and most prominent mental health authority for young people. When he’s offline, he’s usually traveling, gardening, or grilling with his family.

Things you'll learn:

How to determine if your child has a gaming addiction, and why it's important to trust your instincts
Why screen time limits and carrot and stick approaches surrounding a child’s gaming is at odds with the goal of raising a healthy gamer
Why children with ADHD are more susceptible to addictive behaviors surrounding gaming
The importance of engaging in open and non-judgmental communication with your child about their gaming habits and the impact it has on their life
How to shift to a holistic approach that considers overall well-being and goal-setting
Ideas for proactively creating healthy gaming habits with younger children

Resources mentioned:

Healthy Gamer website
How to Raise a Healthy Gamer: End Power Struggles, Break Bad Screen Habits, and Transform Your Relationship with Your Kids by Dr. Alok Kanojia
Growing Up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World by Dr. Devorah Heitner
Dr. Devorah Heitner on Parenting Kids Growing Up in Public (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Screenwise: Helping Kids Thrive (and Survive) in Their Digital World by Dr. Devorah Heitner

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TPP 114a: Nutritionist Jennifer Scribner on Ending the "Picky Eater Battles"

8 mars 2024 | 35 min

TPP 364: A Montessori Approach to Raising Neurodivergent Children, with Simone Davies & Junnifa Uzodike

5 mars 2024 | 45 min

Montessori is often thought of as an educational philosophy, but my guests for today’s episode, Simone Davies and Junnifa Uzodike, are committed to bringing Montessori into the home and guiding parents through the principles of Montessori to enhance their children's development and foster respectful relationships with their families and the world.

Over the years, I’ve learned how much alignment there is in the strength-based parenting approach we subscribe to in our community, where we see and respect our children as the unique humans they are, with the core principles of Montessori, which prioritizes meeting our children where they are and being a guide for them as they navigate their childhood.

So I invited Simone and Junnifa to come on the show to talk about how we can apply these Montessori principles to parenting our neurodivergent kids and some of the other concepts they write about in their lovely new book, The Montessori Child: A Parent's Guide to Raising Capable Children with Creative Minds and Compassionate Hearts.

About Simone Davies

Simone Davies is the author of The Montessori Toddler and co-author of The Montessori Baby and The Montessori Child books, comprehensive guides to raising children in a Montessori way.Simone is an AMI Montessori educator based in Amsterdam. She also has a popular blog, instagram and podcast “The Montessori Notebook” and is mother to two young adults. Simone currently runs parent-child Montessori classes in Amsterdam at her school Jacaranda Tree Montessori.

About Junnifa Uzodike

Junnifa Uzodike is an AMI trained Montessori guide for the 0-3, 3-6 and 6-12 levels. She is the co-author of The Montessori Baby and The Montessori Child book with Simone Davies. She is also the founder and head of school at Fruitful Orchard Montessori in Abuja, Nigeria. Since discovering Montessori in 2011, Junnifa has continued to build her knowledge and experience in child development using Montessori principles. She has three children whom she has raised using Montessori principles from birth. Junnifa’s Montessori work includes guiding children at Fruitful Orchard, mentoring teachers and closest to her heart is supporting parents in implementing Montessori from birth. She inspires parents around the world to bring Montessori into their lives by sharing her Montessori journey and offering courses and other resources via her blog.

Things you'll learn:

What the philosophy of Montessori is and the planes of development
Why the Montessori approach to parenting can be a good fit for neurodivergent children
How to raise children who have a strong moral compass
The role of family agreements to reduce conflict and support healthy family dynamics
What scaffolding looks like in Montessori when helping children expand their sense of capability and responsibility

Resources mentioned:

Simone Davies’ website, The Montessori Notebook
Junnifa Uzodike’s website, Nduoma Montessori
The Montessori Child: A Parent's Guide to Raising Capable Children with Creative Minds and Compassionate Hearts by Simone Davies and Junnifa Uzodike
The Montessori Toddler: A Parent's Guide to Raising a Curious and Responsible Human Being by Simone Davies
The Montessori Baby: A Parent's Guide to Nurturing Your Baby with Love, Respect, and Understanding by Simone Davies and Junnifa Uzodike
The Montessori Notebook on Instagram
Nduoma Montessori on Instagram
Simone Davis on Montessori and Differently Wired Children (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
The Power of Empathy and Staying Calm in Difficult Situations (podcast episode with Simone Davies)
Setting Up Your Home to Support Your Child’s Growth (podcast episode with Simone Davies)

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TPP 109a: Author and entrepreneur Jonathan Fields on How to Live a Good Life

1 mars 2024 | 41 min

TPP 363: Emily Ladau on Demystifying Disability: What to Know, What to Say, and How to be an Ally

27 februari 2024 | 47 min

A theme we often touch upon on this show is how the discourse surrounding neurodivergence and the language used when referring to neurodivergence is ever-evolving. I’ve observed on social media and in other spaces how conversations about terminology can be confusing, divisive, alienating, and complicated to navigate. Disability is one of those terms that can be uncomfortable for some people, including parents of neurodivergent kids, to embrace, but my hope is that this conversation will help you have a deeper understanding of what it means to be disabled, how ableism shows up and hurts all members of the disability community, including our kids, and how we can be better allies in the disability

To talk about this, I invited disability rights activist and writer Emily Ladau onto the show. Emily wrote a wonderful book called Demystifying Disability: What to Know, What to Say, and How to be an Ally, and in today’s conversation, we explore some of the core ideas in her book. As always, we covered a lot of ground in this episode, including what it actually means to be disabled, why the euphemism “special needs” is problematic for many people, how ableism is normalized in our society, disability etiquette do’s and dont’s to keep in mind for future interactions, and so much more.

About Emily Ladau

Emily Ladau is a passionate disability rights activist, writer, storyteller, and digital communications consultant whose career began at the age of 10, when she appeared on several episodes of Sesame Street to educate children about her life with a physical disability. Her writing has been published in outlets including The New York Times, CNN, Vice, and HuffPost and her first book, Demystifying Disability: What to Know, What to Say, and How to be an Ally, was published by Ten Speed Press, an imprint of Penguin Random House, in September 2021. Emily has spoken before numerous audiences, from the U.S. Department of Education to the United Nations. Central to all of Emily’s work is harnessing the power of storytelling to engage people in learning about disability.

Things you'll learn from this episode

The difference between models of disability, including the medical, social, and charity model
Why it’s critical that we recognize and address internalized ableism in order to promote inclusivity
What intersectionality is and ways disability intersects with other marginalized identities
What should be considered when looking at accommodations and accessibility when meeting the diverse needs of individuals
Do’s, don’t’s and best practices when it comes to disability etiquette

Resources mentioned for Demystifying Disability: What to Know, What to Say, and How to be an Ally

Emily Ladau’s website
Demystifying Disability: What to Know, What to Say, and How to be an Ally by Emily Ladau
The Accessible Stall (Emily’s podcast)
Words I Wheel By (Emily’s Facebook page)
Emily on Instagram
Emily on LinkedIn
Tyler Fedder (Illustrator)
D’Arcee Neal
The Platinum Rule

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TPP 108a: Dr. Laura Anderson on Gender Noncomformity and Differently Wired Kids

23 februari 2024 | 55 min

TPP 362: Dr. Chris Wells Explains the Theory of Positive Disintegration

20 februari 2024 | 39 min

I have such a fascinating conversation for you today. A few months ago, I heard about something called the Theory of Positive Disintegration — a theory created by K. Dabrowski, whose name I was familiar with because of his bringing attention to the idea that gifted children have inborn traits known as overexcitabilities – and I was instantly curious. Positive Disintegration – what does that mean exactly? It sounded complicated, and good, but also messy. So I wanted to know more.

That’s when I learned of the work of Dr. Chris Wells, who is the founding president of the Dąbrowski Center and who is dedicated to sharing knowledge and resources about this profound theory and the psychology of giftedness.

I invited Chris on the show to explore the Theory of Positive Disintegration with us, and fortunately for all of us, they said yes. And I will just say upfront — there is a lot that goes into understanding this theory and the implications it has for our differently wired children. So in today’s episode, we are only scratching the surface of this theory. But I am so excited for the opportunity to share this conversation because I believe this fascinating framework has the potential to offer a new perspective on neurodivergence and mental health that is important for families in our community to explore.

One last thing, this episode includes mention of suicidality and suicide attempts, so if those are trigger topics for you, please take care of yourself while listening.

About Chris Wells

Chris Wells, PhD, LSW, is a neurodivergent writer, social worker, and Dąbrowski scholar with a passion for studying and applying the theory of positive disintegration. As the founding president of the Dąbrowski Center and co-host of the Positive Disintegration Podcast, Chris is dedicated to sharing knowledge and resources about this profound theory and the psychology of giftedness.Chris provides specialized consulting services to clinicians and educators internationally, delivering deep insights into positive disintegration and its practical applications. They also offer their unique blend of lived experience and professional expertise as an advocate and speaker for mental health awareness and suicide prevention. Chris lives with their partner and teenage son in Highlands Ranch, Colorado.

Things you'll learn:

What the Theory of Positive Disintegration is and how it offers an alternative perspective on mental health struggles
What the five domains of Dabrowski’s Overexcitabilities
How the connection between overexcitabilities and the autonomic nervous system can provide insights into nervous system regulation
How the Theory of Positive Disintegration fits in with traditional therapeutic modalities
How anxiety and depression might be signs of growth and development

Resources mentioned:

Chris Well’s substack Positive Integration
The Dabrowski Center
The Positive Disintegration Podcast
Dabrowski’s Overexcitabilities
“Mellow Out,” They Say. If I Only Could: Intensities and Sensitivities of the Young and Bright by Michael Piechowski
Michael Piechowski
Adults with Overexciteabilities Facebook Group
Living With Intensity: Understanding the Sensitivity, Excitability, and the Emotional Development of Gifted Children, Adolescents, and Adults edited by Dr. Susan Daniels and Dr. Michael Piechowski
Welcome to Positive Disintegration (Positive Disintegration Podcast)
Depression and Anxiety in Development (Positive Disintegration Podcast)
Positive Disintegration in Children and Adolescents (Positive Disintegration Podcast)
Disintegration and Neurodivergence (Positive Disintegration Podcast)

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TPP 099a: Barry Prizant Talks About His Book "Uniquely Human"

16 februari 2024 | 46 min

In this episode of the Tilt Parenting Podcast, I have a powerful and thoughtful conversation with Dr. Barry Prizant, one of the world’s leading authorities on autism. Barry is recognized as an innovator of respectful, person- and family-centered approaches for individuals with autism and neurodevelopmental disabilities. He has more than forty years of experience as a scholar, researcher, and international consultant, and he’s an adjunct professor at Brown University, a certified speech-language pathologist and director of Childhood Communication Services, a private practice.

Barry is also the author of the must-read book Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism, which suggests a major shift in our understanding of autism. Instead of classifying “autistic” behaviors as signs of pathology, he sees them as part of a range of strategies to cope with a world that feels chaotic and overwhelming. As you listen to our conversation, you’ll know exactly why I was so excited to bring Barry onto the show. He is at the forefront of the revolution in helping to change the way neurodiversity is perceived in the world and frankly I’m just so grateful there are people like him in the world doing this critical work. I hope you enjoy the episode.

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

Barry’s personal story for how he came to be doing this work
How things can change for autistic kids when we reframe and view their “behavior” through a new lens
The relationship between trust and emotional regulation
Barry’s perspective on the use of language such as “high-functioning” and “low-functioning” autism
Why words like “oppositional” and “noncompliant” in relation to an autistic person’s behavior are usually completely off-mark
The very real cost of pathologizing autism
Barry’s powerful ideas for how he is trying to shift thinking around the way autism is perceived
What should our goals be with regards to the long-term vision for our autistic children?
The story behind Barry’s book Uniquely Human

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Barry Prizant’s website
Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism by Dr. Barry Prizant
The S.C.E.R.T.S. Model

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
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Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

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TPP 361: Margaret Webb on Archetypes and the Hero's Journey in Parenting

13 februari 2024 | 49 min

It’s been a little while since Margaret Webb, my absolute favorite parenting coach and the lead parenting coach in the Differently Wired Club, was on the show, but I’m so so so excited to have her one to talk about much anticipated book, Hero’s Journey in Parenting: Parenting the Child You Didn’t Expect While You Were Expecting. Margaret is a certified Master Life Coach, parenting coach, nature-based coach, former elementary school teacher, wife, and mother of a now 20-year-old autistic son. I’ve personally experienced first-hand how deeply and profoundly Margaret’s approach can support parents raising neurodivergent kids, and so I’m truly thrilled that she’s making her insights and learning available to the rest of in her new book.

While we couldn’t explore all the transformational concepts in Margaret’s new book, I did my best to touch upon some of the biggies, including the power in reframing parenting as a hero’s journey, how incorporating archetypes such as the queen/king, child, warrior, and community builder into our framework can provide valuable perspectives and tools for parenting, why recognizing and addressing shadow forces, such as limiting beliefs and unhelpful patterns, can lead to personal growth and more effective parenting. We also discussed why it’s so crucial to understand a child's developmental age in a given moment and how it can help parents tailor their approach and better meet their child's needs.

And honestly, a lot more. This is one of those episodes you’ll probably want to listen to more than once. And then you’ll want to get Margaret’s book. It’s really that good.

About Margaret Webb

Margaret Webb is a certified Master Life Coach, parenting coach, nature-based coach, former teacher, wife and mother. As a life and parenting coach, she weaves together her experience as an elementary education teacher with the tools she’s learned in Martha Beck’s Life Coach Training, Sagefire Institute’s Nature-Based Coach Training, and what she’s applied to her own life as a mom of a now 20-year-old son with special needs.

Things you'll learn:

Parenting is a hero's journey, and it is important to approach it with curiosity, playfulness, and a willingness to learn and grow.
How using archetypes, such as the queen/king, child, warrior, and community builder can provide valuable perspectives and tools for parenting.
Recognizing and addressing shadow forces, such as limiting beliefs and unhelpful patterns, can lead to personal growth and more effective parenting.
Understanding a child's developmental age in a given moment can help parents tailor their approach and better meet their child's needs.

Resources mentioned:

Margaret Webb’s website
Margaret on Facebook
Margaret on Instagram
Hero’s Journey in Parenting: Parenting the Child You Didn’t Expect While You Were Expecting by Margaret Webb
Parenting the Child You Didn’t Expect When You Were Expecting, with Margaret Webb (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Margaret Webb on What to Do When Grandparents Don’t Understand Our Child (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Margaret Webb on How to Get Through the Most Difficult Moments With Our Kids (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Margaret Webb Shares Tools and Mindsets for Surviving the Summer Break (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Byron Katie’s The Work

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TPP 103a: Margaret Webb On How to Get Through the Most Difficult Moments With Our Kids

9 februari 2024 | 50 min

TPP 360: Dr. Jade Rivera on Designing Strengths-Based IEPs

6 februari 2024 | 35 min

If you are parenting a neurodivergent kid, you probably have a lot of experience getting feedback about your child — in IEP meetings, parent teacher conferences, therapists, neuropsychs, school counselors. And, so often this feedback is highlighting what’s hard or challenging and what needs to be improved, which, honestly, takes its toll on us and our kids. It can leave us feeling drained, discouraged, and overwhelmed.

If you relate to this experience in any way, you’re going to appreciate today’s conversation with Dr. Jade Rivera, as she is going to talk with us about a new way she and her team are providing feedback with a completely different, and much more positive and optimistic, focus.

Jade is the Lab Director for the new Strength-Based Assessment Lab at Bridges Graduate School, which uses the Suite of Tools, developed by twice-exceptional thought leaders Dr. Susan Baum and Dr. Robin Shader, to identify what a child likes, loves, and excels at. The goal of the Lab is to empower students, families, educators, and professionals in creating positive and collaborative learning experiences for children facing challenges in their educational environments.

So today, Jade talks with us about her work and the Strength-Based Assessment Lab — what a strengths-based assessment is and how it’s conducted, what differentiates a strength and a talent, how to encourage our kids to pursue their interests without putting pressure on them to live up to our idea of potential. We also talked about how to get strength-based goals incorporated in IEPs and how to approach meetings when we are trying to shift the focus to our child’s strengths.

About Dr. Jade Rivera

As the Lab Director for the Strength-Based Assessment Lab at Bridges Graduate School, Dr. Jade Rivera leads the Lab to empower students, families, educators, and professionals in creating positive and collaborative learning experiences for children facing challenges in their educational environments.

With over fifteen years of experience, she has designed and led micro-schools beloved by quirky and sensitive children, uniquely positioning her to provide insights into positive niche construction, strength-based pedagogy, and talent development for neurodivergent children. Her training in Nonviolent Communication and Montessori credential inspire her educational philosophies and practices, including project-based learning, dual-differentiation strategies, and gradeless classrooms.

In 2016, the California Association for the Gifted honored Jade for distinguished service on behalf of gifted and twice-exceptional children. More recently, she was recognized as a “person to watch in the 2e movement” by 2e News. She earned her Ed.D. at Bridges Graduate School of Cognitive Diversity in 2022. She is honored to continue as a professor at the same school, supporting others as they envision a strength-based world for neurodivergent humans.

Things you'll learn:

How the Strength-Based Assessment Lab at Bridges Graduate School gathers information from the child, caregivers, and professionals in the child's life to identify strengths, environmental obstacles, and dreams for the child's potential
The difference between recognizing and supporting a gifted or twice-exceptional child's strengths and talents and placing pressure on them to reach a certain potential
How parents and educators can incorporate a strengths-based approach in traditional school settings
Ideas for including strength-based goals in IEPs
Why it’s important to foster opportunities for a child to demonstrate what they love and what they're good at, even in small ways

Resources mentioned:

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TPP 102a: Sex Educator Amy Lang Gets Real About Kids and Pornography

2 februari 2024 | 37 min

TPP 359: An Conversation with Dr. Emily Edlynn on Raising Autonomous Children

30 januari 2024 | 44 min

There are so many parenting styles — attachment, helicopter, positive, peaceful, authoritarian, authoritative, and on and on. And those of us parenting neurodivergent kids know there is no one-size-fits-all approach for navigating the day-to-day, even when our big picture goal is similar — to raise children who grow up to know themselves deeply and are prepared to live self-actualized lives, whatever that may look like for them.

So I really loved learning about the focus of Dr. Emily Edlynn’s work on autonomy-supportive parenting, which she defines as “raising our children to understand their authentic selves, including developing self-respect, self-worth, behaving by values, the ability to self-govern, and feeling a sense of volition, or control over choices and actions.” She explains how to do this in her new book, Autonomy Supportive Parenting: Reduce Parental Burnout and Raise Competent, Confident Children, and that’s what we get into in today’s show.

During this conversation, we talk about the ways in which autonomy-supportive parenting nurtures a child's autonomy, competence, and relatedness, which are actually the three needs that must be met according to self-determination theory, what “controlling parenting” is and how it can have negative effects on a child's well-being, and how to balance autonomy support with appropriate support and intervention when parenting a neurodivergent child or a child who is experiencing mental health challenges. We also discussed what keeps parents from adopting autonomy supportive parenting and how to navigate it when one’s partner isn’t on the same page in terms of parenting approach.

About Dr. Emily Edlynn

Dr. Emily Edlynn is a clinical psychologist, author, mother of three, and co-host of the Psychologists Off the Clock podcast. She pens the regular parenting advice column, Ask Your Mom, for Parents.com, has written for national outlets such as Washington Post, Scary Mommy, and Motherly, and has been featured as an expert across parenting articles in outlets such as the New York Times, CNN, and BBC. Emily works with children, teens, and families as the Director of Pediatric Behavioral Medicine at a private practice in Oak Park, IL. She lives in Oak Park with her endlessly supportive partner, three opinionated and charming children, and two rescue dogs. Emily’s new book, Autonomy-Supportive Parenting: Reduce Parental Burnout and Raise Competent, Confident Children is out now.

Things you'll learn:

Autonomy supportive parenting (ASP) is a science-based approach that nurtures a child's autonomy, competence, and relatedness
What “controlling parenting” is and why it can have negative effects on a child's well-being
How ASP can be applied to neurodivergent kids by providing external structure and scaffolding while still promoting their sense of agency
How to balance autonomy support with appropriate support and intervention when parenting a child with mental health challenges
What gets in the way of parents embracing ASP
How to navigate it when one’s partner isn’t on the same page in terms of parenting approach

Resources mentioned:

Dr, Emily Edlynn’s website
Autonomy-Supportive Parenting: Reduce Parental Burnout and Raise Competent, Confident Children by Dr. Emily Edlynn
Emily Edlynn’s free newsletter on Substack
Emily on Instagram
Emily on LinkedIn
All Joy and No Fun: The Paradox of Modern Parenthood by Jennifer Senior
How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success by Julie Lythcott-Haims
Julie Lythcott-Haims on Helping Differently Wired Kids Launch (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Growing Up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World by Dr. Devorah Heitner
Unconditional Parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishment to Love and Reason by Alfie Kohn
I Will Die on This Hill: Autistic Adults, Autism Parents, and the Children Who Deserve a Better World by Meghan Ashburn and Jules Edwards

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TPP 095a: Anya Kamenetz Talks About Her Book "The Art of Screen Time"

26 januari 2024 | 37 min

TPP 358: Dr. Maureen Peterson on Finding Peace in Parenting a Child with Chronic Illness

23 januari 2024 | 43 min

Overwhelm, sadness, guilt, stress, and exhaustion are common experiences for parents raising neurodivergent children, and this is especially true when that child is navigating the complex landscape of also living with a serious or chronic illness. Unpredictability, financial strain, impact on the siblings, uncertainty about a child’s prognosis can all present significant challenges and lead to parental burnout.

But according to my guest, Dr. Maureen Peteren, it’s possible for parents of chronically ill children to regain control of their lives and thrive at fulfillment. And she would know, as she has a distinct birds-eye view both as a general pediatrician and allergist/immunologist, she has spent her career caring for patients with a variety of acute and chronic health problems and first-hand experience of being a parent of a child with long-term health issues.

I asked Maureen, who is also the author of the book Reclaiming Life: A Guide For Parents of Chronically Ill Children, to talk with us about the ways in which managing chronic illness in children requires parents to navigate overwhelming emotions and advocate for their child's health, even when that advocacy can feel uncomfortable; how maintaining perspective and turning challenges into gifts can help parents cope with the emotional toll of parenting a child with a chronic illness, and the importance of open communication with children and involving siblings in the care process in order to foster understanding and support within the family.

Whether your child has asthma, severe allergies, diabetes, or some other chronic health condition, Maureen’s guidance and coaching will give you practical strategies and reframes for finding more peace in your day-to-day lives.

About Maureen Michele Petersen

Maureen Michele Petersen, MD is an award-winning physician, life coach, author, and mom. As a general pediatrician and allergist/immunologist, she has spent her career caring for patients with a variety of acute and chronic health problems. She is an accomplished life coach who helps parents of chronically ill children regain control of their lives and thrive at fulfillment. Maureen is the mother of three amazing children and has first-hand experience with being a parent of a child with long-term health issues.

Things you'll learn from this episode

How to navigate overwhelming emotions that come up due to the unpredictability and uncertainty that accompanies chronic illness in kids
Strategies for maintaining perspective and turning challenges into gifts
How to create a culture of open communication with other children / siblings in the care process in order to foster understanding and support within the family
How to effectively advocate with healthcare providers by staying curious and engaged and being aware of emotions

Resources mentioned for Finding Peace in Parenting a Child with Chronic Illness

Dr. Maureen Michele’s website
Maureen on Instagram
Maureen on Facebook
Reclaiming Life: A Guide For Parents of Chronically Ill Children by Maureen Michele, MD

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TPP 083a: A Conversation with Melissa Wardy About Raising Anxious Kids

19 januari 2024 | 56 min

TPP 357: Parenting At the Intersections of Race and Neurodivergence

16 januari 2024 | 44 min

We’ve talked a lot about advocating for our children on the show, but today, we are adding the additional consideration of race to the conversation, because we know that families raising differently-wired kids of color experience additional roadblocks when it comes to getting support in all kinds of environments, fostering empowering neurodivergent identities and much more. My guests for this rich conversation are Jaya Ramesh and Priya Saaral, authors of the brand new book Parenting at the Intersections: Raising Neurodivergent Children of Color.

They came to this big through their lived experience as neurodivergent moms raising neurodivergent kids in this intersection of race, identity, and disability. Jaya is a psychotherapist in private practice specializing in supporting BIPOC neurodivergent individuals and couples in having more authentic relationships. And Priya is a play therapist and a parenting coach specializing in the emotional well-being of neurodivergent children and parents.

Parenting at the Intersections is a wonderful book, and I did my best to explore some of the concepts they thoughtfully write about, including how parenting at the intersections involves navigating multiple marginalized identities and systems of oppression, why identity development is a complex process for children at the intersections, how parents can create conditions for their kids to be seen and respected, and the ways in which advocating for kids in the education system requires awareness of rights, documentation, and support from organizations and advocates.

About Jaya Ramesh

Jaya Ramesh, MA LMHC, is a psychotherapist in private practice in the greater Seattle area, specializing in supporting BIPOC neurodivergent individuals and couples in having more authentic relationships. She also supports organizations in creating an anti-racist culture in the workplace.

About Priya Saaral

Priya Saaral, MSW, LICSW, RPT-S is a neurodivergent mama, a play therapist, and a parenting coach in the Greater Seattle area, specializing in the emotional well-being of neurodivergent children and parents by helping them reconnect to their playful spirit amidst personal and structural adversity

Things you'll learn:

How parenting at the intersections involves navigating multiple marginalized identities and systems of oppression
Why identity development is a complex process for children at the intersections, and how parents can create conditions for their kids to be seen and respected
The ways in which advocating for kids in the education system requires awareness of rights, documentation, and support from organizations and advocates.
How unschooling can be a form of resistance in the context of raising neurodivergent children of color.
How parents who aren't raising children of color can still benefit from learning about the experiences and challenges faced by these families.
Why community support is crucial in mitigating the loneliness and providing understanding for parents raising neurodivergent children of color.

Resources mentioned:

Parenting at the Intersections: Raising Neurodivergent Children of Color by Jaya Ramesh and Priya Saaral
Website for Parenting at the Intersections
Parenting at the Intersections on Instagram
Jaya on Instagram
Priya on Instagram
Jaya on Linkedin
Cheryl Poe and Advocating 4Kids
Akilah Richards on Unschooling and Raising Free People (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Raising Free People: Unschooling as Liberation and Healing Work by Akilah Richards

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TPP 075a: Julie Neale Talks About Her Mother's Quest to Live an E.P.I.C. Life

12 januari 2024 | 44 min

TPP 356: Supporting Healthy Digital Media Use for Neurodivergent Kids

9 januari 2024 | 43 min

Many of our kids spend a LOT of time engaging on screens and with technology, and I don’t know about you, but for me it feels like this is an ever-changing, and fast-changing landscape, and one that can be hard to stay on top of. Whether we’re talking about assistive technology, videos, games, or social media, these forms of media continue to offer new ways of interacting, developing relationships, and even exploring identity, and this has added to the complexity of raising neurodivergent kiddos. So I invited Dr. Meryl Alper, a researcher on the social and cultural implications of communication technologies with a focus on disability, digital media, and children and families’ tech use to join me to talk about how we should be thinking about our kids’ relationship with screens and tech.

I reached out to Meryl after reading her new book, Kids Across the Spectrums: Growing Up Autistic in the Digital Age, which explores the often-misunderstood technology practices of young autistic people, as well as what it means to be “social” in a hypermediated society.

So that’s what we get into: the factors that influence a child’s relation to media, how digital media is creating spaces for kids to develop their identities online, and what we – parents, schools – should be doing to better educate kids on safely interacting with online communities and new technologies. We also talked about fandoms and how they have become a part of identity and belonging development, and why every parent needs to spend time understanding how their children are using and consuming media.

If your child, autistic or otherwise neurodivergent, regularly engages with screens and tech, you’ll get a lot out of this episode.

About my guest

Dr. Meryl Alper is an Associate Professor of Communication Studies at Northeastern University, where she researches the social and cultural implications of communication technologies, with a focus on disability, digital media, and children and families’ tech use. Dr. Alper is the author of Digital Youth with Disabilities (MIT Press, 2014) and the award-winning Giving Voice: Mobile Communication, Disability, and Inequality (MIT Press, 2017). Her latest book, Kids Across the Spectrums: Growing Up Autistic in the Digital Age (MIT Press, 2023), explores the often-misunderstood technology practices of young people on the autism spectrum, as well as what it means to be “social” in a hypermediated society.

Dr. Alper also draws on nearly 20 years of professional experience in the children’s media industry as a researcher, strategist, and consultant with organizations such as Sesame Workshop, PBS KIDS, Nickelodeon, and Disney. Prior to joining the faculty at Northeastern, Dr.Alper earned a Ph.D. and M.A. from the Annenberg School for Communication and Journalism at the University of Southern California.She also holds a B.S. in Communication Studies and History from Northwestern University, as well as a certificate in Early Childhood Education from UCLA.

Things you'll learn:

Why representation in media is crucial for autistic children to develop a sense of identity and belonging
How technology can provide opportunities for connection and community for autistic children
Special considerations parents and educators could keep in mind regarding online safety for neurodivergent children
The importance of advocating for media literacy education that is catered to neurodivergent children
Why understanding the individual needs and experiences of neurodivergent children is essential when making decisions about their technology use

Resources mentioned:

Meryl Alper’s website
Kids Across the Spectrums: Growing Up Autistic in the Digital Age by Meryl Alper (via MIT Press website)
Download / read the Introduction to Kids Across the Spectrum (PDF)
MIT Press open access version of Kids Across the Spectrum (digital only)
Meryl Alper on LinkedIn
Scratch
Wonder by R.J. Palacio

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TPP 355: Dr. Sharon Saline on Understanding and Working with ADHD in Girls

2 januari 2024 | 42 min

You may have heard about the “lost generation of autistic women,” which refers to those women whose diagnoses were missed when they were younger because of the male gender bias in the diagnostic criteria. But that phenomenon doesn’t just apply to autism – the same thing goes for girls and ADHD. There’s actually been a lot written about this in recent years, including a popular 2020 article in The Guardian called The Lost Girls: Chaotic and Curious, Women with ADHD All Have Missed Red Flags That Haunt Us.

It’s true that the stereotype of a kid with ADHD is that energetic, impulsive, disorganized boy. But in girls especially it can also look like perfectionism and having a hard time receiving feedback, forgetfulness, misreading social cues and struggling with friendships, drifting off, and inconsistency in schoolwork.

In this episode, you’ll hear about why ADHD in girls often goes undiagnosed or misdiagnosed, what kind of ineffective coping strategies girls with ADHD may to hide their struggles, and what some of the early symptoms are and how to recognize them. We also talked about the challenges of how rejection sensitive dysphoria, which co-occurs in many people with ADHD, may impact girls, and ADHD burnout.

About Dr. Sharon Saline

Sharon Saline, Psy.D., clinical psychologist and author of the award-winning book, What Your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew: Working Together to Empower Kids for Success in School and Life and The ADHD solution card deck specializes in working with children, teens, adults and families living with ADHD, learning disabilities, twice exceptionality and mental health issues. With decades of experience as a clinical psychologist and educator/clinician consultant, she guides educators, clinicians, families and adults towards effective communication, closer connections and greater understanding. She lectures and facilitates workshops internationally on topics such as ADHD and neurodivergence, executive functioning, the anxiety spectrum, motivation, perfectionism and working with different kinds of learners.

Things you’ll learn:

Why ADHD in girls often goes undiagnosed or misdiagnosed due to the different ways it presents compared to boys
How girls with ADHD may exhibit symptoms such as anxiety, depression, forgetfulness, difficulty listening, and problems with social interactions
Why girls with ADHD may develop ineffective coping strategies to hide their struggles, leading to challenges in school, relationships, and emotional regulation
Why early diagnosis and support is crucial for girls with ADHD to help them succeed academically, socially, and emotionally
The ways in which RSD (rejection sensitive dysphoria) can complicated social struggles for ADHD girls

Resources mentioned:

Dr. Sharon Saline’s website
Sharon’s YouTube Channel
Sharon on Instagram
Sharon Facebook
What Your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew: Working Together to Empower Kids in School and Life by Dr. Sharon Saline
The ADHD Solution Card Deck: 50 Strategies to Help Kids Learn, Reduce Stress & Improve Family Connections (created by Dr. Sharon Saline)
Sharon Saline on What Our ADHD Kids Wish We Knew (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Dr. Megan Anna Neff on RSD (Neurodivergent Insights)
Sharon Saline on RSD (Additude Today)
Dr. Donna Henderson and Dr. Sarah Wayland on Their Book Is This Autism? (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Is This Autism? A Guide for Clinicians and Everyone Else by Dr. Donna Henderson and Dr. Sarah Wayland
The Lost Girls: Chaotic and Curious, Women with ADHD All Have Missed Red Flags That Haunt Us (The Guardian)

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TPP 079a: Coach and Author Andrea Owen on Raising Her Differently-Wired Son

29 december 2023 | 48 min

TPP 078a: Cultural Changemaker Jess Weiner on Becoming a Successful Advocate

26 december 2023 | 36 min

TPP 077a: Peter Shankman of Faster Than Normal on the Gifts of ADHD

22 december 2023 | 28 min

TPP 354: Strategic Parenting Expert Heather Chauvin on Beating Parenting Overwhelm

19 december 2023 | 48 min

I’m happy to share a rich conversation with strategic parenting coach Heather Chauvin about the plight many mothers of neurodivergent kids find themselves in — prioritizing everyone else’s needs over their own and why it’s so critical that we get out of this pattern.

This is a deeply personal topic for Heather. The way she describes it, by living in survival mode as a parent to her three kids, she was robbing herself of joy, robbing her kids of joy by not being a present parent, and robbing her loved ones of fulfilling relationships. And then in 2013, the universe got her attention when Heather was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. Going through that unexpected journey pushed Heather to take a deeper stand for change and explore how cultural expectations sabotage our dreams.

I wanted to bring Heather on the show for this conversation because I hear from so many mothers who are in various states of struggle in their parenting lives — pouring everything into their kids, running on fumes, sacrificing so much, putting incredible pressure on ourselves to do it all and do it well. Yet, as much as we love our kids and want to be their safe place, we can’t do that unless we are being that for ourselves first.

During this conversation, we talked about what dying to be a good mother syndrome is and why so many mothers suffer from it, why trusting yourself can be the best ally in parenting, and how to approach choosing yourself when you think you don’t have time.

Even though this episode is framed for mothers, it’s a good listen for anyone who is a caregiver, especially if you’ve been feeling like your energy is low or frantic, and that has become the norm.

About Heather Chauvin

Heather Chauvin is a leadership coach who helps ‘successful’ women courageously and authentically live, work, and parent on their own terms.

Heather started her career as a social worker helping adults understand children’s behavior. But it wasn’t until 2013 when a stage 4 cancer diagnosis pushed her to take a deeper stand for change, uncovering how cultural expectations sabotage our dreams. She has been featured in Forbes, Entrepreneur, Real Simple Magazine, Mind Body Green, Google, and more.

When Heather isn’t working, you will find her living out what she teaches which may include kayaking Alaska, snowboarding, hiking, or anything else that challenges what she believes is possible for herself (and inviting her children along the journey). Life is full of opportunities. It’s time to feel alive.

Things you'll learn from this episode

How motherhood and one’s priorities change as our kids get older
How trusting in yourself and your intuition can be a powerful ally in motherhood
What “dying to be a good mother syndrome” is and why so many mothers are living in that space
How Heather helps moms take the first steps toward choosing themselves and what it actually looks like
How to approach choosing yourself if you don’t think you have the time

Resources mentioned:

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TPP 068a: Video Games and Your Child's Physical, Social, and Psychological Well-Being

15 december 2023 | 47 min

TPP 353: Ginger Whitson on Bullying — What it Looks Like, How to Handle It, and How to Protect Our Kids from Being Targets

12 december 2023 | 39 min

I get a lot of requests for different topics to cover on this show, and bullying is a theme that has come up multiple times. And understandably, since we know that children and teens with learning disabilities, ADHD, autism, are much more likely to experience bullying and social rejection. And we know that being on the receiving end of bullying can be traumatic and have long-lasting negative impacts.

So I reached out to Ginger Whitson, an author, mental health professional, educator, and expert educator on bullying, crisis intervention, and child and adolescent emotional and behavioral health and invited her to join me on the show. Because the concept of bullying evokes such strong feelings and likely a lot of misunderstanding about what even qualifies as bullying, that’s where I asked Ginger to start — what exactly IS bullying? And does the bullying today’s kids and teens experience look and feel different from back when we were in school? I mean, with the addition of technology, it just feels like a completely different ball game. I also asked Ginger to guide us on how we should best respond if our child tells us they’re being bullied, if there are ways we can “bully proof” our kids, and how we can preemptively prepare them so they feel they have a plan for dealing with negative behavior from other kids.

In addition to her important work with children and her books, including Friendship & Other Weapons: Group Activities to Help Young Girls Aged 5-11 to Cope with Bullying and The 8 Keys to End Bullying Activity Program Workbook, Ginger, whose work can be found under the name Signe Whitson, is also the C.O.O. of the Life Space Crisis Intervention (LSCI) Institute, an international training program that helps adults turn problem situations into learning opportunities for young people who exhibit challenging behaviors.

About Signe Whitson (Ginger)

Signe Whitson (Ginger) is an author, educator, and mental health professional with 25 years of experience working with children, adolescents, and families. She is also the C.O.O. of the Life Space Crisis Intervention (LSCI) Institute, an international training program that helps adults turn problem situations into learning opportunities for young people who exhibit challenging behaviors.

Things you'll learn:

What bullying looks like today, taking into consideration the technology our kids use and other changes society has gone through in past decades
A definition of bullying and what’s at stake for a child experiencing bullying
Essential strategies parents should follow if their child has been or is being bullied
Characteristics or traits that make kids more likely to be bullied
How to talk with kids who have a heightened sense of rejection about bullying and social rejection
Ways to bully-proof our kids and resources we can share with them
How we can all contribute to raising more empathetic kids

Resources mentioned:

Signe Whitson’s website
8 Keys to End Bullying on Facebook
8 Keys to End Bullying: Strategies for Parents & Schools by Signe Whitson
The 8 Keys to End Bullying Activity Book for Kids & Tweens: Worksheets, Quizzes, Games, & Skills for Putting the Keys Into Action by Signe Whitson
How to Be Angry: Strategies to Help Kids Express Anger Constructively by Signe Whitson
Odd Girl Out, Revised and Updated: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls by Rachel Simmons
Rosalind Wiseman
Queen Bees and Wannabes, 3rd Edition: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boys, and the New Realities of Girl World by Rosalind Wiseman
Dr. Robyn Silverman Explains How to Talk to Kids About Anything (Tilt Parenting podcast)

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TPP 067a: One Mother's Story of Parenting a 2e Daughter with Dyslexia, Dysgraphia, and Dyscalculia

8 december 2023 | 40 min

TPP 352: Occupational Therapist Kelly Mahler on the Power in Understanding & Supporting Neurodivergent Kids' Interoception Experience

5 december 2023 | 38 min

Does your child ever seem disconnected to their body? Maybe they would completely forget to eat if you didn’t remind them because they never experience hunger, or they can play outdoors for hours in freezing weather but because they’re not really noticing how cold it is, they leave the hat, gloves, and coat at home. Or on the flip side, maybe your child is intensely connected? Maybe they experience such strong internal or external body sensations that it is hard for them to pay attention to anything else or it spikes their anxiety or triggers them into fight or flight mode?

These are just a few examples of extremes and variances in interoception awareness, which is essentially the language of our bodies. And for most neurodivergent kids, interoception is a factor in their ability to hear or feel, pay attention, and ultimately respond to the messages their bodies are sending them at any given time.

I wanted to explore this concept of interoception and differently wired kids more deeply for the show, so I reached out to Kelly Mahler, an occupational therapist who specializes in interoception and is a co-principal investigator in several research projects pertaining to topics such as interoception, self-regulation, trauma, and autism.

Kelly answered my big questions about interoception, including how it relates to sensory processing differences or SPD, why it’s essential that we help our children get to know their bodies’ unique language, and the relationship between ADHD, autism, and interoception. We also talked about what happens in our kids’ brains when they increase their interoceptive awareness, and effective strategies for helping our kids develop in this area.

About Kelly Mahler

Kelly Mahler OTD, OTR/L, earned a Doctorate in Occupational Therapy from Misericordia University, Dallas, PA. She has been an occupational therapist for 20 years, serving school-aged children and adults. Kelly is winner of multiple awards, including the 2020 American Occupational Therapy Association Emerging and Innovative Practice Award & a Mom’s Choice Gold Medal. She is an adjunct faculty member at Elizabethtown College, Elizabethtown, PA as well as at Misericordia University, Dallas, PA. Kelly is a co-principal investigator in several research projects pertaining to topics such as interoception, self-regulation, trauma & autism.

Things you'll learn from this episode:

What interoception is and how it relates to sensory processing differences
What the spectrum of interoception awareness is and how extremes may manifest
The relationship between ADHD, autism, and interoception challenges
How to support a child with poor interoception awareness to become more tuned in to their body’s internal experience
What happens in our brains when we start to increase our interoception awareness
How to help older kids who’ve been on the receiving end of compliance-based strategies to reconnect with and trust their bodies

Resources mentioned:

Kelly Mahler’s website
Kelly on Instagram
Interoception: The 8th Sensory System (Facebook group)

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TPP 066a: Allison Carmen on Finding Peace in Uncertainty and Embracing the Word “Maybe"

1 december 2023 | 37 min

TPP 351: Hunter Clarke-Fields on Mindful Parenting & Raising Good Humans Every Day

28 november 2023 | 50 min

So we’ve talked about mindfulness on this show before, and if you’re in my Differently Wired Club, you know that mindfulness meditation is something I explore from time to time but really struggle with implementing in the way I think I’m supposed to. Like, I always feel like I’m doing it wrong or it’s just not for me.

But as my guest today, Hunter Clarke-Fields, explains, there are many accessible ways to practice mindfulness, even for people like me who feel like they can’t, or don’t want to, slow down. And there’s just no disputing the powerful way that mindfulness can support us in helping us be more present, more grounded, more calm, more open, and more curious when navigating all the big, challenging stuff with our neurodivergent kids.

During our conversation, Hunter demonstrates a few mindful techniques to regulate yourself when you need it that are very doable even if you only have 3 minutes — I’ve actually been doing them since we recorded this, and I’m still at it! Hunter also shared strategies to show our kids compassion when they are struggling and introduces us to what has become one of my most favorite positive self-talk phrases — “permission to be human” — as a reminder when we have less than brilliant parenting, or life, moments. She ended the conversation with a beautiful reflection on why it’s important to see our kids for who they are and be willing to be open to the changes that happen every day for them.

About Hunter Clarke-Fields

Hunter Clarke-Fields MSAE, E-RYT (Philadelphia, Pennsylvania) is a Mindfulness Mentor, Mindful Mama podcast host, mom, global speaker, and number 1 bestselling author of Raising Good Humans, as well as her most recent book, Raising Good Humans Every Day (Aug 1, 2023). Hunter has over 20 years of experience in meditation and yoga practices, and helps moms bring more calm and family cooperation into their daily lives. She is a Mindfulness Meditation Teacher, the creator of the Mindful Parenting Course and Teacher Training, and has taught mindfulness to thousands worldwide, including a recent trip to Egypt. Hunter presents talks on parenting, and is a certified teacher of Parent Effectiveness Training. In addition, Hunter coaches smart, accomplished, over-stressed individuals on how to cultivate mindfulness. Hunter is the mother of two active daughters, who challenge her every day to hone her craft! Her work has appeared in CNBC Make It, Parade, Motherhood Moment, The Hollywood Digest, along with on ABC Portland, NBC Milwaukee, CBS South Bend, Kansas Public Radio, and many podcasts.

Things you'll learn from this episode:

What we can learn about our values in moments of shame or discomfort when we don’t show up as the parent we want to be
How Hunter uses the philosophy of “permission to be human” to show herself compassion and accept mistakes will happen
What mindfulness is and what being a mindful parent means
Ways to practice mindfulness that are not traditional meditations
Strategies for showing our kids compassion when everyone (them, us) is struggling
Why it’s essential that we see our children as they are in the present moment (and not how they were yesterday)

Resources mentioned:

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TPP 043a: Why Fostering Cultures of Respect in Our Schools is Critical, with Courtney Macavinta

24 november 2023 | 46 min

TPP 350: Showing Up with Agency, Personal Choice, and Intention, with Dr. Amy Hoyt

21 november 2023 | 39 min

A concept we have explored a lot on this show and in the Tilt community is AGENCY — and always in the context of how to scaffold and support our kids in developing agency or helping them have a bigger sense of control and autonomy in their lives.

But guess what? We — the parents and caregivers in our kids' lives — we need agency too. And in this conversation, we’re going to be exploring how to expand our own sense of agency and personal choice so we can show up more intentionally to our daily lives as parents.

And to talk with us all about this is Dr. Amy Hoyt, a mom of five children, three of whom are differently wired, and a specialist who has been working in the field of trauma for ten years, as a researcher of mass trauma and individual trauma. She is the founder of Mending Trauma, a digital mental health platform dedicated to helping women recover from trauma and PTSD, and is an author, podcaster and speaker passionate about helping others learn skills that allow them to parent and live with intention and agency.

During this conversation, you’ll hear us talk about what agency and choice look like in the context of parenting and how micro choices can help us develop an internal locus of control, which is critical for us to have. Amy also gave us a few short, easy practices we can do that will help us strengthen our sense of agency, as well as reset our nervous system, which for so many of is us in need of support, especially if we tend to operate in a more hypervigilant state due to stressors in our parenting lives.

And because Amy is an expert in trauma, we actually begin our conversion by talking about how residual trauma in adults can be triggered by our parenting journey and how it might show up, especially when we’re raising differently wired kids and we may be differently wired ourselves.

And on that note, a quick trigger warning – in the beginning of this conversation, Amy shares why working in trauma is something she felt called to do, and as part of that, talks about abuse she experienced as a child. So please take care of yourself if that’s a subject that is difficult for you.

About Dr. Amy Hoyt

Dr. Amy Hoyt is a mom of five children, three who are differently abled.She is the founder of Mending Trauma, a digital mental health platform dedicated to helping women recover from trauma and cPTSD.

Dr. Hoyt is certified in Traumatic Stress Studies by the Trauma Research Foundation. She has been working in the field of trauma for ten years, as a researcher of mass trauma (genocide and apartheid) and individual trauma. She is an author, podcaster and speaker and is passionate about helping others learn skills that allow them to parent and live with intention and agency.

Things you'll learn:

What trauma is and how it can show up in our lives and bodies
Where to start if you want to get to know and work to heal your own trauma
What a physiological sigh is and how you can use it to reset your nervous system
What agency is in the context of parenting, and why it’s so important to have
What it means to be “in choice” in our parenting lives, and how micro choices can help develop an internal locus of control
How agency and trauma are connected

Resources mentioned:

Dr. Amy Hoyt’s website, Mending Trauma
Mending Trauma on Instagram
The Impact of Adverse Childhood Experiences on Health and Development in Young Children (National Institute of Health Study)
Trauma Research Foundation
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk
The 12 Steps
Deb Dana’s website, Rhythm of Regulation
Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory by Deb Dana
How Your Nervous System Works and Changes (The Huberman Lab podcast)

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TPP 016a: Understanding and Navigating the Parent-Teacher Relationship with Becca Wertheim

17 november 2023 | 38 min

TPP 349: Surviving and Thriving as a Parent with ADHD, with Elaine Taylor-Klaus (Impact ADHD)

14 november 2023 | 42 min

Today I’m covering a topic that was suggested by a listener and, as soon as I read her email, I was like, Yes! And also, I can’t believe we haven’t done an episode on this yet!

So… today we’re going to be talking about being a parent with ADHD who is parenting neurodivergent children. Because I know there are endless parenting responsibilities that rely heavily on having solid executive function skills or balancing an inordinate amount of demands and emotional labor, and I know that these same requirements are likely not super strengths for a parent with ADHD.

This is where my guest today, Elaine Taylor-Klaus, found herself — stressed, overwhelmed, and struggling as a mom to three complex kids. When she initially shared with a psychiatrist how badly she was doing and asked if there might be something else going on, she was told, yes, it’s called being a mom.

But Elaine pushed for answers, finally getting a diagnosis of ADHD when she was in her early 40s. That new identification, and the personal development journey it initiated, changed life for Elaine and her family in the best possible way.

This is such a good conversation today, as we get into the many things parents with ADHD typically struggle with, how parents can best support themselves with the emotional and mental demands of parenting, and of course, we touch upon the many strengths of ADHD that can be leveraged to make a neuromixed family work better. I hope you enjoy it!

About Elaine Taylor-Klaus

Elaine Taylor-Klaus is a professional certified coach, parenting coach, writer, speaker and mother in an ADHD family of five. The Co-Founder of ImpactADHD, Elaine provides ADD Parent Support for managing "complex" kids with ADHD and other challenges. ImpactADHD’s coaching and training programs are dedicated to effectively support entire families by helping parents learn how to deal with a child with ADHD. Using online, group and personal coaching, as well as articles, blogs, forums and selected resources – all in an interactive format – ImpactADHD.com teaches parents to develop personalized strategic plans for themselves and their families. Through coaching with Elaine, and public presentations to schools and parent groups, parents are inspired to confidently raise successful, independent children. Elaine coaches parents, and teaches them how to use those skills to communicate more effectively with their kids. Elaine’s husband, David, is also her business partner in their shared company, Touchstone Coaching, which is the parent company for ImpactADHD and DTK Coaching.

Things you'll learn:

How receiving an ADHD diagnosis positively impacted Elaine’s parenting and family life
The most common challenges facing parents with ADHD as they navigate parenting in general, and specifically in raising neurodivergent kids
What helps parents the most in bridging the gap for their children when they are also struggling being a person with ADHD
The strengths that come with ADHD and how they can be leveraged to support one’s life as a parent

Resources mentioned:

Impact Parents
The Essential Guide to Raising Complex Kids with ADHD, Anxiety and More by Elaine Taylor-Klaus
Special resources for Tilt Parenting listeners in ImpactParents
Parenting with Impact Podcast
Impact ADHD Resources for Parents
Elaine Taylor-Klaus on LinkedIn
Diane Demster

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TPP 019a: Slow Processing Speed — What It Is and How to Support Kids Who Have It

10 november 2023 | 39 min

TPP 348: How to Help Our Kids Thrive in Tough Times, with Stephanie Malia Krauss

7 november 2023 | 49 min

On this show, we’ve talked about the effect that the pandemic has had on our kids, we’ve talked about the youth mental health crisis, we’ve talked about the complexities of our kids developing their identity online. It’s clear that our kids are growing up in a time with unique challenges and very different from when we were kids and adolescents. So how can we help our children to truly thrive even in the face of so much disruption and uncertainty? My guest today, Stephanie Malia Krauss, is here to answer those questions and more.

I enjoyed this conversation so much, and especially the thoughtfulness with which Stephanie explores how our kids are experiencing their childhood and what it takes for them to grow up healthy and whole. We explored mental health, hope, resilience, identity, and so much more. This is a must-listen to episode for anyone who has the privilege of being a safe adult in the life of any child, whether you're a parent, a teacher, a coach, amentor.

I hope you enjoy our conversation.

About Stephanie Malia Krauss

Stephanie Malia Krauss is an educator, social worker, and leading voice on what kids need to thrive in times of crisis and change. She is the author of Whole Child, Whole Life: 10 Ways to Help Kids Live, Learn, and Thrive and Making It: What Today’s Kids Need for Tomorrow’s World. Stephanie’s work and writing have been featured on NPR, PBS, Insider, and more. Stephanie is also a senior fellow with the CERES Institute for Children & Youth at Boston University and Education Northwest.

Things you'll learn:

An overview of Stephanie’s new book Whole Child, Whole Life: 10 Ways to Help Kids Live
Why it's so critical that we consider determinators and demographics when we're thinking about how to support our kids
What parents and adults in neurodivergent kids' lives need to know when it comes to prioritizing kids’ mental health
What future forecasting is and how we can use it with our kids to reignite their hope and sense of agency
What Stephanie defines as purpose and how can help our kids in identifying or capitalizing on a purpose they may already have within them
How we can be an “identity-safe adult” for the children in our lives

Resources mentioned:

Stephanie Malia Krauss’ website
Whole Child, Whole Life: 10 Ways to Help Kids Live, Learn, and Thrive and Making It: What Today’s Kids Need for Tomorrow’s World by Stephanie Malia Krauss
Whole Child, Whole Life website
How We Can Prepare Differently Wired Children for an Uncharted Future, with Stephanie Malia Krauss (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Making It: What Today’s Kids Need for Tomorrow’s World by Stephanie Krauss
Heather Malin, Stanford University
Laura Hernandez
Stephanie on Twitter
Stephanie on Instagram
Stephanie on LinkedIn
Tilt Parenting listeners can get 20% off their copy of Whole Child, Whole Life by going to Corwin.com and using the code SAVE20. For a signed bookplate, they can email proof of purchase to [email protected]

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How Acceptance (& Regret!) Help Our Parenting Dr. Diana Hill — Mindful Parenting Podcast on Tilt

3 november 2023 | 54 min

TPP 347: Raising a Demand Avoidant Child or Teen (PDA), with Casey Ehrlich

31 oktober 2023 | 46 min

I’m really happy to be bringing another conversation about PDA to the show, especially as awareness and understanding of this complex profile of autism is growing and more and more parents are looking for resources to navigate this especially challenging parenting journey. Oh, and in case you’re not familiar with PDA, it’s an acronym that technically stands for Pathological Demand Avoidance, though many people who identify as PDAers prefer the words persistent desire for autonomy.

My guest for today’s conversation is Casey Ehrlich. In our conversation, Casey sheds light on how to approach raising a child with PDA at different stages, explores the differences between PDA and ODD, considers how burnout manifests in someone with PDA, and explains how a child with a PDA profile might experience a loss of autonomy and equality on a daily basis. Casey also walks us through her framework for supporting families with PDA kids and what it takes to find peace and acceptance in showing up for a PDA child no matter what.

About Casey Ehrlich, Ph.D.

Casey Ehrlich, Ph.D. is a coach and educator to parents raising PDA Autistic children and teens and is the founder of At Peace Parents and a podcast by the same name. She is also the co-founder of the PDA Parents community and podcast. Casey brings her background in social science, methodology, and research to take an objective and non-judgmental approach to supporting families.She is currently conducting empirical research on Pathological Demand Avoidance with a faculty member at the University of Michigan and is raising two sons, one of whom is PDA Autistic.

Things you'll learn:

What PDA is, and how it overlaps (if at all) with ODD
How burnout manifests in someone with a PDA profile and the overlaps between PDA burnout and autistic burnout
Why people with a PDA profile experience a loss of autonomy and equality when demands are placed on them
How Casey helps parents raising kids with a PDA profile
What low-demand parenting actually looks like in practice

Resources mentioned:

Casey’s website, At Peace Parents
At Peace Parents on Instagram
At Peace Parents Podcast
Free “Clarity” Masterclass
Paradigm Shift Program
Dr. Mona Delahooke
Deconstructing Oppositional Defiant Disorder (Mona Delahooke blog)
Dr. Dan Siegel
Tina Payne Bryson
A Conversation about Declarative Language and Co-Regulation, with Linda Murphy (Tilt Parenting podcast)
Linda Murphy’s website
Declarative Language Handbook: Using a Thoughtful Language Style to Help Kids with Social Learning Challenges Feel Competent, Connected, and Understood by Linda K. Murphy
Kristy Forbes’ website InTune Pathways
Dr. Melissa Neff on Pathological Demand Avoidance In Children (Tilt Parenting podcast)
Polyvagal Theory
Sensory Processing Disorder (Star Institute)
Dr. Megan Anna Neff on Diagnoses and Misdiagnoses (It’s Complicated!) (Tilt Parenting podcast)
Amanda Diekman and Low Demand Parenting (Tilt Parenting podcast)

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TPP 032a: How to Eliminate Control Battles With Your Differently-Wired Teen, with Neil Brown

27 oktober 2023 | 41 min

TPP 346: Gil Gershoni on Creativity, Dyslexic Design Thinking and Tapping into the Hyper-Abilities of Dyslexic People

24 oktober 2023 | 42 min

I know it can be incredibly powerful and transformational for parents raising differently wired kids to hear from neurodivergent adults about their lived experience. How did they feel as a child? What was it that helped them navigate feelings of inadequacy they may have internalized or the challenges of being a child who was misunderstood or whose gifts were overlooked? That’s why I’m so happy to share today’s conversation with Gil Gershoni, the founder and creative director of the branding firm Gershoni Creative, the creator of the Dyslexic Design Thinking methodology, and the host of the Dyslexic Design Thinking podcast. Gil’s big goal is to show the world that dyslexic thinkers can open new doors and innovate absolutely anything.

I invited Gil to share his inspiring story of how, as a child, he shifted his relationship with his dyslexia so it became the key to his finding so much success in his creative work, as well as to help listeners better understand the link between dyslexia and creativity. In telling us about his journey and his perspectives on the gifts of neurodivergence, Gil also shares how parents can best support and show up for our dyslexic kids so they have the knowledge and confidence to leverage their unique brains.

Gil is also the creator of a wonderful, empowering initiative called Dear Dyslexia: The Postcard Project, which invites dyslexics of all ages — from students to professionals — to depict their relationship with dyslexia on postcards using words and image, so I asked him to share with us the why behind that initiative and tell us how it’s helping dyslexics everywhere, especially kids, really lean into who they are.

I really enjoyed having this sit down with Gil, someone who is very much on the frontlines of the paradigm shift we’re all a part of. Whether your child is dyslexic, has another learning disability, or is in any way neurodivergent, I hope this conversation feels supportive, inspirational, and motivating for you.

About Gil Gershoni

Gil Gershoni is the founder and creative director of the branding firm Gershoni Creative. He says that everything he does, he does dyslexic. Gil sees dyslexia as a hyper-ability. His goal is to show the world that dyslexic thinkers can open new doors and innovate anything.

Along with Gershoni Creative, Gil created Dyslexic Design Thinking, a method that helps clients see new perspectives and tell the story of their brand. Gil also hosts Dyslexic Design Thinking, a podcast that explores the link between dyslexia and creativity. Through these outlets, Gil spotlights dyslexic thinkers and ideas.

Things you'll learn:

What made the difference in Gil’s life as being someone who ultimately embraced and leveraged the gifts of his dyslexic brain
What Gil’s Dyslexic Design Thinking methodology is, and how it can be used to support creativity, problem solving, and more
How Gil defines the gifts and “hyperabilities” of the dyslexic brain
How Gil supports parents powerfully showing up for and advocating for their kids
How Dear Dyslexia: the Postcard Project has help kids redefine their relationship with their dyslexia
How parents can help their child to unlock their own potential

Resources mentioned:

Dyslexic Design Thinking
Dyslexic Design Thinking podcast
Dear Dyslexia: The Postcard Project
David Flink
Jonathan Mooney
12-Year-Old Asher Talks with Social Movement Leader David Flink (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
LD and ADHD Advocate and Author Jonathan Mooney on Why Normal Sucks (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Description of Gil’s talk about SXSW

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TPP 028a: Understanding and Combatting Negative Stigmas Associated with Neurological Differences

20 oktober 2023 | 40 min

TPP 345: Julie Skonick On Understanding & Supporting Gifted and Distractible Kids

17 oktober 2023 | 42 min

The conversation around twice exceptionality has advanced a lot in the past few years but there still exists substantial resistance and misunderstanding about what it means to be 2e. As my guest today, Julie Skolnick, writes about in her new book Gifted and Distractible, it’s a widely held misconception that intellectual ability and social and emotional success go hand in hand. Which is why kids who are gifted and have simultaneous learning differences like ADHD, Autism, or dyslexia—are often not fully seen and supported by parents, teachers, and themselves.

In a world where these complex learners are often labeled lazy, scattered, attention-seeking, and a problem that can’t be solved, I am totally behind Julie’s mission to passionately guide parents of gifted and distractible children to bring out the best and raise self-confidence in their 2e kids. And in today’s conversation, she shares some of her best insights and ideas about how we can reimagine the world through our child’s unique perspective—so we can help them thrive.

Her book, Gifted and Distractible: Understanding, Supporting, and Advocating for Your Twice Exceptional Child, literally comes out the day this episode is released! If you’re raising a twice exceptional kid, I highly encourage you to grab a copy after listening to our conversation… Julie really did share all of her experience and insights and hard-won wisdom inside for us to benefit from.

About my guest

Julie F. Rosenbaum Skolnick, M.A., J.D., Founder of With Understanding Comes Calm, LLC, passionately guides parents of gifted and distractible children, mentors 2e adults, trains educators and advises professionals on how to bring out the best and raise self-confidence in their 2e students and clients.

A prolific writer and beloved speaker, Julie hosts “The Haystack 2e Adult Membership Group” which welcomes all ‘2e adult needles,’ hosts Let’s Talk 2e! Parent Empowerment Groups, produces virtual conferences, and publishes “Gifted & Distractible,” a free weekly newsletter. Her book, Gifted and Distractible: Understanding, Supporting, and Advocating for Your Twice Exceptional Child, was published in October 2023. Located in Maryland, USA, Julie’s clients and audience hail from all four corners of the globe.

You'll learn:

How Julie is helping to expand the understanding of twice exceptionality
What trends Julie is observing regarding educators’ willingness to explore and provide creative ways to support 2e kids
Misunderstandings that Julie addresses over and over again about the twice exceptional population and why supporting 2e kids has to start with deeply understanding them
The biggest challenges parents raising 2e kids face
What we should be thinking about when trying to identify therapists or modalities that might support our 2e kids

Resources mentioned:

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TPP 213a: How to Talk to Kids When the World Feels Like a Scary Place

13 oktober 2023 | 43 min

TPP 344: Dr. Robyn Silverman Explains How To Talk to Kids About Anything

10 oktober 2023 | 47 min

I’m going to confess something with you right here and now. When it comes to having important conversations with my kid, about tricky topics, big issues…things where the stakes feel very high, I often feel like I blow it. I get really anxious, if the subject comes up without any advance warning I fumble over my words, I very often say the exact wrong thing and then feel stressed about what I wish I’d said and then I often awkwardly force a do-over. You get the point. Am I the only one?

Okay, so if you are like me and you struggle with knowing what to say anything that feels big and important and potentially tricky, you are going to love this episode.

Because today I’m sharing a conversation with Dr. Robyn Silverman about her new book How to Talk to Kids About Anything: Tips, Scripts, Stories, and Steps to Make Even the Toughest Conversations Easier. And when Robyn says anything, she means anything.

Today we are talking about how to have conversations with our kids, no matter their age, about things like death, sex, diversity, depression, suicide, big feelings, and more, and even more, why it matters so much that we are safe, informed adults to talk about these issues with our kids, and how a little preparation goes a long way in terms of helping us feel regulated and calm. We want our kids to know that we’re always there to talk with them about anything and that we are their top trusted and safe source of information, no matter the topic.

About my guest

Known as the “Conversation Doc,” Dr.Robyn Silverman is a child and teen development specialist and host of the popular podcast, How to Talk to Kids About Anything, as well as the book of the same name. She is a cofounder of the Powerful Words Character System, which gives educators the talking points they need to help children become kind, responsible citizens of the world. Dr. Robyn has appeared on The Today Show, Good Morning America, CBS Early Show and Nightline and has been quoted on CNN and in the New York Times, Washington Post, and many other publications.

You'll learn:

The impetus behind Robyn’s new book How to Talk to Kids About Anything and why she decided to include so many expert voices in it
The biggest roadblocks that get in the way of parents talking about difficult or uncomfortable subjects with their kids
How to customize “scripts” for your individual family’s needs
Common mistakes parents make when broaching tricky topics
Advice for parenting kids who are struggling with emotional and mental health challenges
An example of how a conversation about a difficult topic might change over time and why it’s important that it is a continuous conversation

Resources mentioned:

Dr. Robyn Silverman’s website
How to Talk to Kids about Anything: Tips, Scripts, Stories, and Steps to Make Even the Toughest Conversations Easier by Dr. Robyn Silverman
How to Talk to Kids About Anything (Dr. Robyn’s podcast)
Dr. Robyn Silverman on Nurturing Our Kids’ Character and Character Strengths (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Dr. Robyn on Facebook
Dr. Robyn in Instagram
Dr. Robyn on X
The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Kids Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives by Dr. William Stixrud and Ned Johnson
Julie Lythcott-Haims
Jessica Lahey

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TPP 074a: "Child Decoded"—A New "Manual" for Parents Raising Differently Wired Kids

6 oktober 2023 | 35 min

TPP 343: What You Need to Know About Modern Day Puberty, with Cara Natterson and Vanessa Kroll Bennett

3 oktober 2023 | 47 min

I’ve got a question for you: What’s your relationship with puberty? You know, that inescapable part of every human’s experience, marked by body changes, emotional swings, awkward stages, and more? Personally, I don’t look back on my journey through puberty with whole lotta fondness.

Yet, being that it IS part of every child’s development process, puberty is something that we as parents and actually any adult supporting children are going to want to deeply understand so we can help our kids navigate it in a way that preserves their sense of self-worth, body confidence, and emotional, physical, and mental safety.

And, what I’ve learned from my guests for today’s show, “modern” puberty, is not the same puberty you and I went through however many years ago.

Cara and Vanessa wrote all about it in their wonderful book, This is So Awkward: Modern Puberty Explained, which explains the science behind all that’s happening at this stage in a kid's lives AND also provides insights into how to talk to kids about it. Because, honestly, even talking about all things puberty with our kids can feel super awkward and uncomfortable for them us. But luckily, Cara and Vanessa are here to hold our hand through it all, and provide us with the facts, language, and strategies for helping us navigate these conversations and this phase of life with confidence and calm.

About Cara Natterson

Cara Natterson, MD, is a pediatrician, consultant, and New York Times bestselling author. She’s also the co-founder and CEO of Order of Magnitude, a company dedicated to flipping puberty-positive. Cara’s books focus largely on puberty — some written for the kids going through it, and others for the adults helping them along the way. Her list of titles includes The Care and Keeping of You series with more than 7 million copies in print. While this reach is incredible, the written word is only one way to transform the experience of adolescence.

About Vanessa Kroll Bennett

Vanessa Kroll Bennett is a puberty educator and writer, a podcaster, and entrepreneur who helps adults navigate uncertainty while they support the kids they love. Vanessa is the co-host of The Puberty Podcast which is exactly what it sounds like and the founder of Dynamo Girl, a company focused on building kids’ self-esteem through sports, puberty education and parent workshops. Vanessa consults with organizations, large and small, on how to authentically engage children in their communities. As the host of Conversations on Parenting and Beyond and the first Scholar in Residence at Wasserman Center for Family Life at the JCC Manhattan, Vanessa explores all aspects of growing families. She writes regularly in her Uncertain Parenting Newsletter about the messy process of raising tweens and teens, including her own four children ages 11 to 19.

Things you'll learn from this episode

How the way today’s kids experience puberty, aka, “modern puberty,” is different from what their parents experienced
Why talking about puberty is about more than just body changes and sex, and what other important topics need to be part of the conversation
Some of the words that Cara and Vanessa introduce in their book as part of the new vocabulary to use in your conversations with your kids
Advice for parents whose kids might be really reluctant to engage in dialogue about the changes that accompany puberty
How parents can regulate themselves before having difficult conversations with their kids

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TPP 047a: The Connection Between Creativity and Neurodiversity, with Kathryn Haydon

29 september 2023 | 40 min

TPP 342: Dr. Devorah Heitner on Parenting Kids Who Are Growing Up in Public

26 september 2023 | 58 min

Welcome to this week’s show, where I’m so excited to be talking, bringing back to the show my friend, colleague, and my most trusted mentor when it comes to all things kids and tech and screens, Dr. Devorah Heitner.

Today, we’re going to be talking about such a pressing consideration for anyone raising a kid these days — what it means for today’s generation of kids to grow up with very public lives and coming of age in a digital world where so many aspects of their lives are online and available for public consumption, not to mention that much of their important work of identity formation is being shaped by the media and technology they interact with.

Devorah gets into all of this in her brand new and essential book for any parent, Growing Up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World. For this conversation, I asked Devorah to talk us through what I see as some of the more pressing issues for parents like us, including how to balance a child’s right to privacy in their texts and online lives with valid concerns about online influences and engagement when that child is dealing with anxiety, depression or other mental health disorder, the impact of social media on kids who may already be struggling to fit in and find their people, and how many homework and grading apps used by schools may actually be undermining our kids development of executive function skills and creating additional stress for parents.

About my guest

Dr. Devorah Heitner is the author of Growing Up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World and Screenwise: Helping Kids Thrive (and Survive) in Their Digital World. Her work has appeared in the New York Times, The Washington Post, The Wall Street Journal, and CNN Opinion. She has a Ph.D. in Media/Technology & Society from Northwestern University and has taught at DePaul and Northwestern. You can follow her on Substack at Devorah Heitner dot Substack dot com and on Instagram @devorahheitnerphd.

Things you'll learn

How to navigate the transition from being highly involved in a children’s tech life to respecting their privacy
Why violating our kids’ trust by reading their texts will drive them further apart from us
What to track or monitor when your child is dealing with anxiety, depression, or other mental health disorders
How engaging in social media may impact kids who are struggling to fit in and find their people
Why social media can act as an intensifier for whatever kids are experiencing and how it causes a dip in self-esteem
What sharenting is and how to navigate permissions, cleaning up past shares, and more
Why apps like ClassDojo are particularly challenging for families with differently-wired students
How grading apps often work against differently wired students

Resources mentioned

Devorah Heitner’s website
Growing Up in Public: Coming of Age in a Digital World by Dr. Devorah Heitner
Screenwise: Helping Kids Thrive (and Survive) in Their Digital World by Dr. Devorah Heitner
Deborah Heitner’s Substack: Mentoring Kids in a Connected World
Phonewise Boot Camp
The Big Tech Reset Masterclass with Devorah Heitner (Tilt Parenting-partnered event)
Devorah’s TEDx Talk, The Challenges of Raising a Digital Native
At Your Wit’s End with a Screen-Obsessed Kid? Read This (Devorah Heitner’s house visit on NPR Lifekit)
Devorah on Twitter
Devorah on Instagram
Dr. Devorah Heitner on Online Safety, Internet “Rabbit Holes,” and Differently Wired Kids (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Dr. Devorah Heitner on the Pros & Cons of “Managing” Our Kids’ Screen Time (Tilt Parenting Podcast)

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TPP 122a: Debbie and Her Husband Derin On How They Designed Their Alliance

22 september 2023 | 43 min

TPP 056a: Debbie and Her Husband Derin Talk About Parenting a Differently-Wired Child

21 september 2023 | 57 min

TPP 341: Dr. Lori Desautels on Shifting Educational Systems Towards Post Traumatic Growth

29 augusti 2023 | 37 min

Dr. Lori Desautels is coming back to the show to talk about her new book Intentional Neuroplasticity: Our Educational Journey Towards Post Traumatic Growth, which stems from her passion of applying the social and relational neurosciences to education and integrating her applied research into classroom procedures and transitions prepping the nervous system for learning and felt safety.

An Assistant Professor at Butler University, K-12 educator, and researcher, Lori joined me on the podcast last year to talk about her book Connections over Compliance: Rewiring our Perceptions of Discipline, and that conversation has really just stayed with me, so I loved having this opportunity to go deep with her about intentional neuroplasticity.

In this conversation, we discussed some of the research about neuroplasticity not only in kids but in adults, and how we can use it and what we know about the nervous system to help us co-regulate at home and at school and truly meet our children where they are.

Dr. Lori Desautels, has been an Assistant Professor at Butler University since 2016 where she teaches both undergraduate and graduate programs in the College of Education. Her passion is engaging her students through the social and relational neurosciences as it applies to education by integrating the Applied Educational Neuroscience framework, and its learning principles and practices into her coursework at Butler. The Applied Educational Neuroscience Certification, created by Lori in 2016, is specifically designed to meet the needs of educators, counselors, clinicians and administrators who work beside children and adolescents who have, and are, experiencing adversity and trauma. The certification is now global and has reached hundreds of educators.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What this school year has shown us about the impact COVID has had on students and educators
What the research says about neuroplasticity in adults and how we can use it in co-regulating with children and students
What “building a nest” for our kids means, and and why it’s the best place to start when tending to our kids nervous systems
How Lori’s approach has been received by educators
What’s possible in classrooms when teachers apply Lori’s methodology to nervous system management

Resources mentioned

Revelations in Education, Dr. Lori Desautel’s website
Intentional Neuroplasticity: Our Educational Journey Towards Post Traumatic Growth by Dr. Lori Desautels
Connections Over Compliance: Rewiring Our Perceptions of Discipline by Dr. Lori Desautels
Eyes Are Never Quiet: Listening Beneath the Behaviors of Our Most Troubled Students by Dr. Lori Desautels
Resources from Revelations

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TPP 044a: Amy Lang on Sex Education and Differently-Wired Kids

25 augusti 2023 | 60 min

TPP 340: Meghan Ashburn and Jules Edwards on Autistic Adults, Autism Parents, and the Children Who Deserve a Better World

22 augusti 2023 | 51 min

My guests today are on a mission to show parents that there are different ways of approaching autism beyond what they’re told in doctors or therapists offices. Meghan Ashburn and Jules Edwards, co-authors of the book I Will Die on This Hill: Autistic Adults, Autism Parents, and the Children Who Deserve a Better World, are making it really clear that there is no one size fits all for any families and that there is so much to learn from just listening more.

Meghan Ashburn is a continuous learner, educational consultant, parent mentor, and co-author of I Will Die On This Hill. She's passionate about helping schools create more inclusive, accessible environments. Her online book club has over 10K members, and releases book recommendation lists on autism and neurodiversity. Meghan advocates for communication rights and inclusion at the local, state, and national level. She sits on her school district's Special Education Advisory Committee (SEAC) and is a recent graduate of Virginia's Partners in Policymaking.

Jules Edwards is a neurodivergent Anishinaabe writer, gardener, accountant, and disability justice advocate. She is the parent of neurodivergent Afro Indigenous people, and care provider to many neurodivergent children throughout the years. Jules is passionate about building community and works to improve child safety and disability policy.

Current roles include: care work of disabled youth, co-founder of Minnesota Autistic Alliance, board member for the Minnesota Ombudsman for American Indian Families, board member of The Arc Minnesota. She serves as the elected chairperson of the Minnesota Autism Council, a workgroup of the Senate Human Services Reform Finance and Policy Committee.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What disability justice is
Ways that allistic and autistic parents raising autistic children can work together toward our common goals for our kids
The harms of a continual pursuit for “normal” in ways that don’t respect or embrace our kids’ neurodivergence
Why self-determination should be the goal over “independence”
Ways that allistic parents may be perpetuating ableism without realizing it
What an “autism moon” is and why ideal for families who are navigating a new diagnosis of autism

Resources mentioned

Meghan Ashburn’s website Not an Autism Mom
Meghan Ashburn’s Au-Some Book Club
I Will Die on This Hill: Autistic Adults, Autism Parents, and the Children Who Deserve a Better World by Meghan Ashburn and Jules Edwards
The Reason I Jump: The Inner Voice of a 13-Year-Old Boy with Autism by Naoki Higashida

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TPP 097a: A "Masterclass" in Executive Functioning with Seth Perler (Part 2 of 2)

18 augusti 2023 | 42 min

This week is a continuation of last week’s episode with executive functioning coach Seth Perler, which was so packed full of information (and also so long) that I had to break it up into two separate episodes, which I’m now referring to as a “masterclass” in executive functioning.

In last week’s episode, Seth shared his protocol for setting up a child for success in their developing executive functioning skills. In today’s episode, Seth is going to get into the nitty gritty about specific strategies he uses to address different executive functioning challenges that show up in school and in life.

Seth Perler is a renegade teacher turned Executive Function Coach/Education Coach who is based in Santa Monica, CA and Boulder, CO. He helps struggling students navigate a crazy educational landscape and does his part to “disrupt” and improve education. Seth specializes in Executive Function and 2e. Find out more at sethperler.com.

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

What “Frankenstudy” is, and how to know where to focus your energies so you can create a “domino effect” with your child’s fledgling executive functioning skills
How to best use “learning planners” to learn how to think / talk through their plan (and what we’re doing wrong)
The benefits of monthly planners versus daily or weekly planners
Helping kids identify the “MIT” – most important thing – each day
The importance of creating a sacred study space for a child
How to optimize an internet browser to make it easy with bookmark bars (and have tabs automatically open, including calendar, grade tab, email)
Why it’s important to get kids to start checking grades weekly (Seth recommends Sunday nights)
The importance of helping a child create clearly identified routines (for leaving house, doing daily plan, doing homework, etc.)
How getting visual with kids benefits them in developing their executive functioning skills
Why separate digital timers need to be a part of a child’s life so they can learn to calibrate time, as well as get started and do short bursts of work
Creating a weekly overhaul of systems
The important of kids “getting into the mode” for studying, etc: organize their space, make their plan, and executive

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Seth Perler’s website and blog
A “Masterclass” in Executive Functioning with Seth Perler, Part 1 (podcast episode)
A Conversation with Executive Functioning Coach Seth Perler (original podcast episode)
Seth’s Executive Functioning Assessment
Seth Perler’s YouTube Channel

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 339: Dayna Abraham on Helping Parents Calm the Chaos

15 augusti 2023 | 45 min

Today I’m welcoming back Dayna Abraham to the show to discuss her latest book, Calm the Chaos: A Fail-Proof Road Map for Parenting Even the Most Challenging Kids. I really resonate with Dayna’s work because we both are committed to empowering families, especially those who are deep in survival mode, and in her new book, she shares the framework for her signature “calm the chaos” framework which is designed to give parents a doable plan for navigating challenging situations and finding genuine calm in the midst of the storm. In our conversation today, Dayan gives us the highlights of this framework and gives us some strategies to start employing right away.

I’m betting most of you are familiar with Dayna Abraham, but just in case, here’s a bit about her. Dayna is the bestselling author of The Superkids Activity Guide to Conquering Every Day and Sensory Processing 101. She is on a mission to create a more accepting world, one challenging kid at a time. As a National Board Certified educator, parent of three neurodivergent children, and an ADHD adult herself, Dayna brings a unique and out-of-the-box perspective to parents raising kids in the modern world. Through Calm the Chaos, she has helped millions of desperate parents around the world find peace and meet their children where they’re at when conventional parenting tools have failed them.

About Dayna Abraham

Dayna Abraham, bestselling author of The Superkids Activity Guide to Conquering Every Day and Sensory Processing 101, is on a mission to create a more accepting world, one challenging kid at a time.

As a National Board Certified educator, parent of three neurodivergent children, and an ADHD adult herself, Dayna brings a unique and out-of-the-box perspective to parents raising kids in the modern world.

Through her compassionate framework, Calm the Chaos, she has helped millions of desperate parents around the world, find peace and meet their children where they’re at when conventional parenting tools have failed them.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What the five stages of Dayna’s Calm the Chaos framework are and how they work together
Why every stage of the framework includes these four elements: You, Connect, Understand and Empower
What emotional anchors are and how they can help parents regulate themselves
Why getting back to emotional safety and nervous system regulation is so important and what it looks like in action
Ideas for finding calm in the midst of challenging situations

Resources mentioned for:

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TPP 096a: A "Masterclass" in Executive Functioning with Seth Perler (Part 1 of 2)

11 augusti 2023 | 38 min

In this episode of the TiLT Parenting Podcast, I’m bringing back a previous guest, executive functioning coach Seth Perler, for a two-part series in which Seth shares with us the exact approach he uses with students he works with when helping them foster their fledgling executive functioning skills.

I first had Seth on the show last fall, where he gave us an introduction to executive functioning, but we didn’t get to the more practical strategies that I know so many of us are looking for. So I asked Seth to come back on, and that conversation turned into an hour-and-a-half long sharing by Seth of truly valuable tips and strategies and insights. Because Seth shares so very much over the course of these ninety or so minutes, I wanted to split our conversation into two parts. So this episode is part one of what I’m now referring to as a “Masterclass in Executive Functioning.” In this episode, Seth shares with us his protocol for setting up a child for success in their developing executive functioning skills. In part 2 next week, Seth will go in-depth into his specific strategies surrounding building these skills in school and in life.

Seth Perler is a renegade teacher turned Executive Function Coach/Education Coach who is based in Santa Monica, CA and Boulder, CO. He helps struggling students navigate a crazy educational landscape and does his part to “disrupt” and improve education. Seth specializes in Executive Function and 2e. Find out more at sethperler.com.

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

Seth’s definition of executive functioning framed so it helps people apply the principles to help kids
A step-by-step breakdown of exactly how Seth works with families
Why our relationship with our child is the number one thing to be preserved when doing this work
The importance of parents doing their own personal work / self-care during this process
Why kids “can’t do what we’re asking them to do because they can’t, not because they won’t,” so we need to back up and scaffold from where they’re at
The role of mindfulness, mindset, and motivation
Why symptoms are more important than labels
Why it’s critical to understand the role of emotional regulation in executive functioning
How we as parents can co-regulate our emotions with our child
Why we want to focus on 3 positives for every 1 negative

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Seth Perler’s website
A Conversation with Executive Functioning Coach Seth Perler (original podcast episode)
Seth’s Executive Functioning Assessment
Dr. Gail Saltz Talks About the Power of Different (podcast episode)
Carol Dweck and Mindset

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 338: When Home Isn’t Working: How to Find Therapeutic Programs, with Sue Scheff

8 augusti 2023 | 40 min

Today I’m bringing you an episode that covers a new topic for this show — how to find the right program when you realize your child is in need of more substantial therapeutic support or intervention. I’ve wanted to cover this topic for a long time because I know how overwhelming it can be if this is a road your family is going down. Sue Scheff has decades of experience in this field, personal and professional, and I’m grateful she joined me to shed light on the ins and outs of navigating different therapeutic programs.

With Sue’s fascinating background, we could have explored many different topics for this episode, but what I wanted to do in this conversation is to have Sue give us an overview of the options available to parents whose kids are struggling with challenging or dangerous behaviors and are in need of more intensive supports. Sue explains the difference between therapeutic boarding schools, residential treatment centers and wilderness programs, what the signals are that a child would benefit from these types of supports, how to identify the best fit program, the possibilities for having programs covered by insurance, and much more.

About Sue Scheff

Founder and President of Parents’ Universal Resource Experts Inc. (P.U.R.E.™), Sue Scheff has been leveraging her personal experiences to help others through her organization since 2001.

After being stalked, harassed, bullied and slandered online – in 2006, Scheff won a landmark case for internet defamation with an $11.3M jury verdict. Since then, she’s been an advocate for cyberbullying prevention and promoting the importance of online reputation.

She has three published books, Wit’s End (HCI 2007), Google Bomb (HCI 2009) with a foreword by Michael Fertik, and her latest, Shame Nation: The Global Epidemic of Online Hate (Sourcebooks 2017) with a foreword by Monica Lewinsky.

Things you'll learn from this episode

The differences between therapeutic boarding schools, residential treatment centers, and wilderness programs
What the signs are that a child may be in need of more intensive intervention or a therapeutic program
How to go about identifying and vetting programs that are an ideal fit for a child’s individual challenges
The possibilities that exist for having the high cost of therapeutic programs be partially (or fully) covered by insurance
Whether or not parents should be concerned about placing their teens in programs where their peer group may be dealing with more problematic behavior and negatively influence a teen
Why any therapeutic program has to involve the whole family in order for it to be effective

Resources mentioned for

Sue Scheff’s website
Parents’ Universal Resource Experts Inc. (P.U.R.E.™)
Wit’s End: Advice and Resources for Saving Your Out-of-Control Teen by Sue Scheff
Google Bomb: The Global Epidemic of Online Hate by Sue Scheff
Shame Nation: The Global Epidemic of Online Hate by Sue Scheff
Sue Scheff on Facebook

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 017a: One Mother's Radical, Nature-Based Approach to Helping Her Daughter Live with Anxiety

4 augusti 2023 | 37 min

In this episode, I talk with Jill Emmelhainz, the mother of a 14-year-old differently-wired daughter who struggles with severe anxiety. Over the years, Jill and her husband noticed their daughter Anna’s anxiety was greatly reduced when she spent time outdoors and in nature, so this past year, they decided to try something radical and fully immerse themselves in nature for extended periods of time to see what would happen. For six weeks in fall 2015 and five weeks in spring 2016, Jill and her daughter have hiked the Appalachian Trail in the eastern U.S. The result? During those weeks in nature, Anna’s anxiety all but disappeared, and she’s found ways to bring the learnings from those experiences back into her day-to-day life in a helpful way. JIll and her daughter’s story is fascinating…we have a sense you’ll think so, too!

Jill Emmelhainz says: “I have had the privilege of raising and homeschooling our seven children. Travel and creativity have always been part of our family life. Now that we have only one child still at home, she and I enjoy outdoor adventures as a way to help her cope with significant life challenges.”

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

How trying something completely new and radical can sometimes have unexpected, positive consequences
The power of having shared, powerful experiences with a child (especially one who’s a teenager)
Suggestions for getting kids more excited about and engaged in outdoor time and nature

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder by Richard Louv
Jill’s blog, The Big Epic

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 337: Phyllis Fagell on Raising Resilient Teens in Turbulent Times

1 augusti 2023 | 47 min

This week I’m bringing back school counselor, therapist, and author Phyllis Fagell to talk about her new book Middle School Superpowers: Raising Resilient Tweens in Turbulent Times which she wrote as a response to what she is seeing in her work with children in the aftermath of COVID.

During this interview, we talked about why this generation of tweens is more insecure, vulnerable, and eager to please perhaps than past generations, effective strategies for helping kids who might be rigid thinkers become more flexible, and how parents can coach their kids around navigating, forming and maintaining healthy friendships.

Phyllis L. Fagell, LCPC is the school counselor at Sheridan School in Washington, DC, a therapist who works with children and teens in private practice, and an author and journalist. She is the author of Middle School Matters: The 10 Key Skills Kids Need to Thrive in Middle School and Beyond – and How Parents Can Help and her most recent book, Middle School Superpowers: Raising Resilient Tweens in Turbulent Times.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Why this generation of tweens is more insecure, vulnerable, and eager to please than past generations
How to help kids who might be rigid thinkers to become more flexible
What Phyllis is seeing in how kids are connecting and finding a sense of belonging in the post-pandemic era
How parents can coach their kids around navigating, forming, and maintaining healthy friendships
What the “magic question is” and how to use it to support our kids in developing empathy
How to navigate situations where our kids are seeking support from sources that may not be our first choice
Why it’s important to respect how our kids want to present their neurodiversity and other parts of their identities to the world

Resources mentioned

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 101a: TV Creator Angela Santomero on Her New Book "Preschool Clues"

28 juli 2023 | 34 min

Angela Santomero is also an author, and one I had the chance to work with very closely over the past two years, as she asked me to be her co-author for her new book Preschool Clues: Raising Smart, Inspired, and Engaged Kids in a Screen-Filled World, which comes out one week from today! Preschool Clues shares the secret sauce behind Angela’s shows’ powerful, transformative results in the form of eleven research-based, foundational “clues” to ensure that preschoolers flourish academically, socially, and emotionally during this critical time.

In this episode, Angela and I talk about the book—what it’s about, who it’s for, and how it supports parents in parenting their preschoolers and beyond. Though the book isn’t written specifically for an audience of parents raising differently wired kids, the “clues” we share are relevant for any parent of any child. And the bonus? I was able to bring my unique lens as the mother of an atypical kid to the project, and so we took special care to ensure the book is inclusive of every type of child.

Angela Santomero is the creator of many preschool TV shows including Blue’s Clues, Super Why, Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood, Creative Galaxy, and Wishenpoof, and was the host of The Parent Show with Angela Santomero on PBS. She has a Master’s degree in Child Developmental Psychology from Teachers College, Columbia University with a sub-concentration in Instructional Technology and Media. Find out more at Angela’s website, Angela’s Clues.

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

The story behind the book Preschool Clues
The importance of a healthy media diet and choosing high-quality programs for our kids
How Angela defines the ingredients of a high-quality program for preschoolers: educational, interaction, and engagement
How parents can use the “power of the Pause” in their every day life
The importance of celebrating the small things
How parents can embrace media as part of their parenting toolkit
How programs like Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood help kids learn through social stories

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Angela’s Clues (Angela’s website)
Preschool Clues: Raising Smart, Inspired, and Engaged Kids in a Screen-Filled World by Angela Santomero and Deborah Reber
Blue’s Clues (Nick Jr.)
Super Why (PBS Kids)
Daniel Tiger’s Neighborhood (PBS Kids)
Daniel Tiger Becomes a Boy with Autism’s Guide to Social Life (article from New York Times’ Motherload)

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 336: Dr. Megan Anna Neff on Diagnoses and Misdiagnoses (It’s Complicated!)

25 juli 2023 | 34 min

Dr. Megan Anna Neff, is a clinical psychologist specializing in the support and empowerment of neurodivergent adults through her expertise in neurodivergent affirming care and assessments. She comes on the show to talk about the complexity of diagnosis and the why’s behind the misdiagnoses.

We dive deep into the assessment process and why so many people slip through the cracks when seeking a diagnosis, why it’s important to get clarity around a child’s wiring in order to provide them with support that will be meaningful and affirming, why identifying one’s neurodivergence (either through self-identification or a medical diagnosis) matters, and the kind of trauma a person can experience when they go through life without a diagnosis.

Dr. Megan Anna Neff is a clinical psychologist based in Oregon, specializing in the support and empowerment of neurodivergent adults through her expertise in neurodivergent affirming care and assessments. Megan Anna has co-authored two books and published in several peer-reviewed psychological journals. Her forthcoming book, Self Care for Autistic People, exemplifies her dedication to providing accessible resources for the neurodivergent community.

Things you'll learn from this episode

The difference between a self-diagnosis and a medical diagnosis
How the COVID pandemic influenced the influx of adults discovering their neurodivergence
What Misdiagnosis Mondays is and how and why Megan Anna created it
Why it’s important to tease out the core or underlying issues when a child is struggling with multiple neurodivergences and/or mental health challenges
The kind of trauma a child can experience when they go through life without a diagnosis
How we can support our kids in getting back to a baseline if they have built up trauma in their systems
How to identify and vet neuropsych evaluators who take a neurodivergent affirming approach to the assessment process

Resources mentioned

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 069a: 12-year-old Asher Talks About His Experience at Summer Camp

21 juli 2023 | 37 min

A few months ago, Asher and I recorded an episode about the upcoming summer camps he was getting ready for, especially Space Camp. In that episode, Asher shared how he worked with his therapist over the spring to prep for tricky situations he predicted might come up while there. If you haven’t listened to that episode yet, I highly recommend you go back and check it out … you can find it here.

At the end of that episode, we promised to do a post-camp follow up so Asher could share how things went, whether or not his strategies worked, and more. So that’s what today’s episode is about… Summer Camp, Part 2. I will say that Space Camp ended up being a bit of a disappointment for Asher, and in addition to dealing with his own emotions surrounding his expectations not being met, he also felt bad because he knew so many people were rooting for him. So I’m really proud of Asher for sharing his experience for this podcast. I hope you enjoy it.

Debbie Reber is the founder of Tilt and the host of the Tilt Parenting Podcast. 12-year-old Asher is Debbie’s child and is regularly featured on the podcast. Find out more by visiting the About Page.

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

How Space Camp went for Asher
The unforeseen challenges for Asher at camp and how he dealt with them
How Asher would prepare differently for camp if he could do it all over again
The tricky balance between setting too high and too low expectations
What it was like for Asher to be at a camp with peers who had ADHD (Eye to Eye Camp)
How Asher coped with pre-camp anxiety and jitters

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 335: Amanda Diekman Dropping Demands, Restoring Calm, and Finding Connection with Your Uniquely Wired Child

18 juli 2023 | 49 min

I’ve gotten to know today’s guest, Amanda Diekman, over the past year after I participated in her Low Demand Parenting Summit, which I know many of you attended, and more recently, read her new book, Low-demand Parenting: Dropping Demands, Restoring Calm, and Finding Connection With Your Uniquely Wired Child.

Because low-demand parenting can be such an effective approach to supporting differently wired kids, especially kids who fall under the PDA profile of autism, I invited Amanda to join the show for a conversation about what this parenting approach looks like. An autistic adult, parent coach, and author in the neurodiversity space, Amanda has become a leading voice in the movement for low demand parenting practice. She runs a successful coaching practice for parents of neurodivergent children including online courses and a vibrant membership community. During this episode, we talk about what low demand parenting is, why it’s different than what might be referred to as “permissive” parenting, why it’s so effective for kids with PDA, and how she helps parents loosen up the mindset around non-negotiables.

About Amanda Diekman

Amanda Diekman is an autistic adult, parent coach, and author in the neurodiversity space. Amanda has become a leading voice in the movement for low demand parenting practices, with her book Low Demand Parenting to be published July 2023. Amanda runs a successful coaching practice for parents of neurodivergent children including online courses and a vibrant membership community.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What led Amanda to implement low-demand parenting in her family
What low demand parenting is, and why it’s often misconstrued as permissive
The relationship between PDA and low-demand parenting
Examples of big demands and tiny demands, and how shifting the focus can reduce stress for kids
How Amanda helps parents in loosening their mindset about what they define as non-negotiables
Ideas for practicing low-demand parenting in regard to our kids’ relationship with technology and screens
How Amanda and her co-parenting partner came to work together using low-demand parenting

Resources mentioned:

Amanda Diekman’s website
Low-demand Parenting: Dropping Demands, Restoring Calm, and Finding Connection With Your Uniquely Wired Child by Amanda Diekman
Amanda Diekman on Instagram
The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children by Dr. Ross Greene
Akilah Richards on Raising Free People (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Raising Free People: Unschooling as Liberation and Healing Work by Akilah Richards

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 059a: 12-year-old Asher Talks About How He's Prepping for Sleep Away Camp

14 juli 2023 | 30 min

A special kid's POV episode where Asher and I talk all about that rite of passage for millions of children around the world—sleep away camp. This summer, Asher is going to a sleep away camp for the second time in his life. The first time was two years ago, when he went to a very traditional outdoorsy camp with his best friend in the Pacific Northwest. All things considered, that experience went pretty well, and we learned a few things about what can be hard about camp and what kind of situations might be challenging for Asher (and for many differently-wired kids).

This year, we’re going to give it another try, this time at Space Camp in Huntsville, Alabama, something Asher is, shall we say, INCREDIBLY excited about. And at the same time, when we first signed him up, Asher recognized there would be situations at Space Camp that could potentially be especially tough for him. As you’ll hear, Asher came to me and asked to work with a therapist / coach to help him figure out strategies for navigating tricky situations that might come up.

So, that’s what we’re going to talk about today…the different strategies we’ve used to help Asher get prepared for sleep away camp, as well as Asher’s own revelations about what he thinks will help him have a positive experience, even if and when things come up that push him mentally and emotionally.

Debbie Reber is the founder of Tilt and the host of the Tilt Parenting Podcast. Asher is Debbie’s son and is regularly featured on the podcast.

Things you'll learn from this episode:

How Debbie and Asher prepped for the kinds of situations that might come up at sleep away camp
Asher’s new strategy for getting “un-angry”
How Maslov’s Hierachy of Needs has helped Asher learn more about his own emotional responses

Resources Mentioned:

Camp Orkila
Space Camp
Kate Berger on What Mindfulness Can Do for Kids and How to Get Started (podcast)
Asher Talks with David Flink, a Social Movement Leader on the Front Lines of the Learning Differences Movement (podcast)
Julie George on the Role of Executive Functioning in Differently-Wired Kids (podcast)
Eye to Eye National
Kerbal Space Program
The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 334: Dr. Katie Davis on Digital Media’s Role in the Lives of Differently Wired Kids

11 juli 2023 | 50 min

My guest today is Dr. Katie Davis, a researcher on the impact of digital technologies on young people’s learning, development, and well-being, and the author of the fascinating new book, Technology’s Child: Digital Media’s Role in the Ages and Stages of Growing Up. The world of technology is ever-expanding and its integration into our lives so seamlessly that we often don’t stop to consider what effect it’s having on us and our children. In this conversation, Katie helps us understand what this impact is and what we want to consider surrounding our kids’ use of tech.

Katie and I explore how technology is accelerating the full arc of child development, what the research says about the efficacy of apps that are sold as tools to develop kids’ learning and things like executive function skills and whether or not ADHD symptoms can be exacerbated by technology use. We also discussed gaming disorder and how to support children in their usage of social media while they are developing and exploring their identities.

About Dr. Katie Davis

Dr. Katie Davis is Associate Professor at the University of Washington (UW) and Director of the UW Digital Youth Lab. For nearly twenty years, she has been researching the impact of digital technologies on young people’s learning, development, and well-being. In her latest book, Technology’s Child: Digital Media’s Role in the Ages and Stages of Growing Up, Dr. Davis brings clarity to what we know about technology’s role in child development and provides guidance on how to help children of all ages make the most of their digital experiences.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What Katie’s book Technology’s Child: Digital Media’s Role in the Ages and Stages of Growing Up is about and what she was hoping to accomplish by sharing it with the world
How technology is accelerating the full arc of child development
What “design abuse” is and how it keeps kids engaged in technology
The effects of technology on our kids’ fledgling executive function skills
What the research says about the efficacy of apps marketed as tools to support kids’ executive function skill development
How to support kids in the usage of social media while developing their identities

Resources

Dr. Katie Davis’ website
Technology’s Child: Digital Media’s Role in the Ages and Stages of Growing Up by Dr. Katie Davis
Dr. Katie Davis on Instagram
Dr. Katie Davis on Twitter
Sign up for Katie’s Technology’s Child newsletter to receive information, ideas, and updates related to the book and my work, as well as a sample chapter from Katie’s book
Devorah Heitner on Helping Kids Thrive in Their Digital Worlds (Tilt Parenting Podcast)

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 021a: 12-year-old Asher Talks About LIfe as a Homeschooled Kid

7 juli 2023 | 27 min

TPP 333: David Marcus on Post-High School Alternative Paths for Differently Wired Kids

4 juli 2023 | 41 min

We’re talking about what we often call in the neurodivergent space, long runways, for our emerging young adults, specifically alternative paths for differently wired students who are graduating high school but may not either be ready for a “typical” college experience or for whom college isn’t part of the plan.

We do get a little update from Dave on the admissions landscape, but most of the this episode is dedicated to considering other options for students, including gap years, apprenticeships, taking a few classes at a community college, and most importantly, slowing the whole “launching” process down to support kids who would really benefit from extra time to develop and grow, recover from mental health challenges, destress, and more.

About my guest:

David L Marcus is a college admissions coach who loves helping students and parents find balance and joy. He has been a journalist, author and teacher – as well as a writing coach for CEOs.

David wrote a book about college admissions, Acceptance (published by Penguin Books). He also wrote a book about struggling teens, What It Takes to Pull Me Through (published by Houghton Mifflin). He has appeared on the Today show and NPR’s Morning Edition; he has spoken about education at conferences, schools, churches, and synagogues across the U.S. David is an honors graduate of Brown University. He was a Nieman Fellow at Harvard. But he says classes at a community college changed his life.

Things you'll learn:

What has changed for students who are college bound now that we are through the pandemic
How the decision-making and admission process has changed for students and for colleges
Why gap years can be such a good option for some students and the different ways a gap year might look
Why community college might be a good starting point for neurodivergent kids
Other options for kids who don’t want to take the college route after high school
Advice for parents with kids close to the end of high school on how to support them after they graduate

Resources:

David Marcus’ website
Acceptance: A Legendary Guidance Counselor Helps Seven Kids Find the Right Colleges–and Find Themselves by David Marcus
What It Takes To Pull Me Through: Four Troubled Teenagers And Fourteen Months That Transformed Them by David Marcus
College Vetting, Admissions, & Accommodations for Differently Wired Students (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
Seven Steps to College Success: A Pathway for Students with Disabilities by Elizabeth Hamblet
Gap Year Association
College Autism Spectrum

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Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

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TPP 093a: A Conversation with ADHD and Autism Parent Coach Penny Williams

30 juni 2023 | 54 min

This weeks' guest is Penny Williams, author of the book Boy Without Instructions: Surviving the Learning Curve of Parenting a Child with ADHD, as well The Insiders Guide to ADHD, and What To Expect When Parenting a Child with ADHD. Penny is also the founder of Parenting ADHD and Autism, which features a blog, coaching, and the Parenting ADHD podcast, all aimed at helping parents raising special kids survive, thrive, and parent with purpose.

In our conversation, Penny shares her story of raising her differently wired son, gives us the inside scoop on her books, and shares some of her best strategies for getting through the tough moments with our unique kiddos. I hope you enjoy the episode!

Penny Williams is a coffee-lovin’, ADHD-obsessed momma on a mission, and she’s honored to help families on this always chaotic, often stressful, anything-but-ordinary parenting journey. Through her award-winning books, online parent training programs, and parent coaching, Penny helps families like yours survive and thrive in the face of ADHD through a compassionate, purposeful parenthood.

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

Penny’s personal story of discovering her son’s neurodifferences and advocating for him in school
Why holding her son back one year in school was the best decision Penny made (but she had to follow her gut to make it)
Penny’s thoughts on medicating kids for ADHD, as well as her story in figuring out the best medication path for her son
Why Penny had mom guilt with some her choices in supporting her son
Penny’s thoughts on the co-morbid diagnoses of ADHD and autism
The challenges of getting a thorough and accurate diagnosis when there are multiple symptoms

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Parenting ADHD and Aspergers (Penny’s website)
Boy Without Instructions:Surviving the Learning Curve of Parenting a Child with ADHD by Penny Williams
What to Expect When Parenting Children with ADHD: A 9-Step Plan to Master the Struggles and Triumphs of Parenting a Child with ADHD by Penny Williams
The Insider’s Guide to ADHD: Adults with ADHD Reveal the Secret to Parenting Kids with ADHD by Penny Williams
Parenting ADHD Podcast

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 332: How to Rekindle Your Child’s Motivation, with Dr. Ellen Braaten

27 juni 2023 | 48 min

Dr. Ellen Braaten was one of my first guests on the Tilt Parenting podcast, when she joined me back in 2016 to talk about her book about processing speed, Bright Kids Who Can’t Keep Up. I’m so happy to be bringing her back to the show to talk about motivation,, which is the topic for her wonderful new book, Bright Kids Who Couldn’t Care Less: How to Rekindle Your Child’s Motivation.

In this episode, we explore motivation (or what we might perceive as a lack of motivation) in our kids from many angles, including what is really going on when our child appears to be unmotivated, the relationship between executive function and motivation, how resilience comes into play, and the way in which we as parents and caregivers can support our kids in gaining confidence and skills so they can make meaningful progress towards the things that light them up.

About Dr. Ellen Braaten

Dr. Ellen Braaten is the Executive Director of the Learning and Emotional Assessment Program (LEAP) at Massachusetts General Hospital, and an Associate Professor of Psychology at Harvard Medical School. Dr. Braaten is widely recognized as an expert in the field of pediatric neuropsychological and psychological assessment, particularly in the areas of assessing learning disabilities and attentional disorders. She is the co-author of many books and articles for parents and professionals including the bestselling book, Bright Kids Who Can’t Keep Up. Her newest book, Bright Kids Who Couldn’t Care Less: How to Rekindle Your Child’s Motivation was published in March of 2023.

Things you'll learn from this episode

-Why people sometimes misconstrue struggles with motivation as laziness (and how they’re getting it wrong)

-How executive function challenges and challenges with getting, or staying, motivated are connected

-What the parenting APP framework is and how it helps parents in supporting their children in feeling more motivated

-What “flow” is and how can we leverage that to support our kids’ fledgling motivation

-How to support kids in setting and working towards goals with kids who are particularly demand-avoidant

Resources

-Dr. Ellen Braaten’s website

-Bright Kids Who Couldn’t Care Less: How to Rekindle Your Child’s Motivation by Dr. Ellen Braaten

-Bright Kids Who Can’t Keep Up: Help Your Child Overcome Slow Processing Speed and Keep Up in a Fast-Paced World by Dr. Ellen Braaten

-Exploring Slow Processing Speed with Dr. Ellen Braaten (Tilt Parenting Podcast)

-Traits of Flow According to Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi

-The Learning and Emotional Assessment Program at Mass General

-Doable: A Girls’ Guide to Accomplishing Just About Anything by Debbie Reber

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

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TPP 057a: Using a Strengths-Based Approach to Support Differently Wired Kids

23 juni 2023 | 41 min

This episode features a conversation with Giselle Marzo Segura, a designer, teacher, mentor, writer and solutions thinker based in Miami, Florida, who is also the parent of a differently-wired daughter. As a result of her journey with her daughter, Giselle was moved to create a venture called Strength Clusters, which is all about helping people understand and connect with each other through the language of character strengths.

I’ll let Giselle tell you her whole story, because it’s very inspiring and personal, but for now, I’ll let you know that we’re going to be talking about his idea of why current systems aimed at supporting differently-wired kids do so by focusing on the deficits. We’ll also get into how truly transformational it can be, not just for the child but for the whole family, when we flip that on its head and focus on an individual’s strengths.

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

The cost of not allowing differently-wired kids to hang out in their areas of strength for large chunks of the day
Why Giselle believes differently-wired kids need the opportunity to express what’s inside of them
What the language of positive psychology and character strengths is
What happens when the whole family views each other through the lens of character strengths and is on the same page
The magic of looking at a child as a whole person
That there are other types of learning beyond cognitive learning, such as learning through the body and emotions

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Strength Clusters (Giselle’s website)
Character Strenths are Virtues: A Handbook and Classification by Martin Seligman and Christopher Peterson
Via Character Strengths Survey
Brene Brown’s website
The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are by Brene Brown
Pamela Slim’s website

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 331: John Sovec on Supporting LGBTQIA+ Differently Wired Kids

20 juni 2023 | 39 min

Today I’m delighted to be bringing to the show a conversation about supporting LGBTQIA+ kids, and I have the perfect guest to explore this topic with, John Sovec, a therapist, author, and nationally recognized expert on creating affirmative support for LGBTQIA+ teens and their families during the coming out process. I wanted to talk with John because these conversations are becoming increasingly prevalent within our neurodivergent communities.

During our conversation, John explained what “coming out” means and why it’s such a significant and ongoing event for any LGBTQIA+ person. He also shared his thoughts on the high correlation between neurodivergence and gender nonconformity, how parents can best respond when their child comes out to them, why affirmation is more important than acceptance, and why it’s so important that parents honor their own process as they navigate understanding their child’s identity.

About John Sovec

John Sovec, MA, LMFT is a nationally recognized expert on creating affirmative support for LGBTQIA+ teens and their families during the coming out process. He is the author of Out: A Parent’s Guide to Supporting Your LGBTQIA+ Kid Through Coming Out and Beyond (JKP, 2023). John is a frequent contributor to numerous publications on providing LGBTQIA+ support, speaks at conferences nationally, and provides training and professional consultation on LGBTQIA+ competencies for community agencies, schools, and nonprofits. In addition, he consults and trains on the corporate level regarding diversity, equity, and LGBTQIA+ inclusion.

In December 2019, he was appointed by Governor Gavin Newsom to the California Board of Behavioral Sciences. John is the host of OutTalk, a monthly web series for OutCare Health.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Why it’s important that LGBTQIA+ kids have access to therapists and mental health support that is affirming and informed in the community’s specific challenges
What LGBTQIA+ plus stands for
What “coming out” means in our contemporary society
John’s guidance for how parents can respond to their child’s coming out in a way that feels supportive and loving
How parents can show up for their LGBTQIA+ kids in an affirming way
What parents with LGBTQIA+ kids are most concerned about and how they can navigate their own emotional process

Resources mentioned for

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
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TPP 106a: Author and Parent Coach Julie King on Sibling Dynamics

16 juni 2023 | 47 min

If you are the parent of more than one child, neurotypical or atypical, this is an episode you are definitely going to want to listen to. I get requests for topics from listeners all the time (which, by the way, is great…please keep them coming!), and one of the most common requests is for an episode specifically on sibling relationships. So I found the perfect guest to talk about the sibling dynamic—parent educator Julie King.

Julie co-authored the book How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen, a Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7 alongside Joanna Faber, and leads dynamic lecture/presentations for schools and other parent organizations. Among the workshops she offers is one based on Siblings Without Rivalry, and she brings to her work the perspective of having raised two differently-wired and one neurotypical kids herself. I’m really excited to share this conversation with you, and I hope to do more episodes on this topic.

Julie King has been educating and supporting parents since 1995. In addition to her work with individual parents and couples, she is a highly regarded parenting workshop leader and public presenter. Her most popular workshops, How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and How To Talk So Little Kids Will Listen, are based on the bestselling books of Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish and her own book, written with Joanna Faber.

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

What the common challenges are for siblings in families with differently wired kids
Best practices for creating and maintaining family harmony
How to approach conflict resolution in a way that’s respectful, peaceful, and fosters growth
The power of the “reframe” conflicts as problems in need of solutions
How to handle “inequalities” in the amount of attention and/or resources one sibling may be receiving over another due to neurodifferences
Strategies for addressing one child’s anger about or resentment of their sibling
The key to finding solutions to sibling conflicts that get everyone’s needs met

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Julie King’s website
How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7 by Joanna Faber and Julie King
How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen Facebook Page
How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen (website)

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 330: Recognizing Less Obvious Autism with Donna Henderson & Sarah Wayland

13 juni 2023 | 57 min

Dr. Donna Henderson and Dr. Sarah Wayland's new book Is This Autism is a game-changing labor of love in which they clarify the many ways that autism can present, particularly in people who camouflage to hide their autistic traits. Their book walks readers through the diagnostic criteria in a way that presents a much deeper understanding of how those criteria can, and should, be interpreted.

We cover a lot of ground in this extra-long episode, including why so many people, including women and girls and people in marginalized groups, are being misdiagnosed or simply “missed,” as well as why it’s critical that we look beyond the stereotypes of autism and gain a rich, nuanced understanding of the autistic experience.

Dr. Donna Henderson has been a clinical psychologist for over 30 years. She is passionate about identifying and supporting autistic individuals, particularly those who camouflage. Dr. Sarah Wayland is the founder of Guiding Exceptional Parents, and co-founder of The Behavior Revolution.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Why there is an unwillingness to explore autism among many clinicians, as well as a lack of training for how to assess for it
How Sarah and Donna’s joint book came together and what their goal is in getting it out into the world
Why so many autistic people are being missed in a “traditional” diagnostic process
Donna and Sarah’s thoughts on why the number of people getting an autism diagnostic has increased recent years
Whether or not there is a place for “subjectivity” by an evaluator in the diagnostic process

Resources mentioned

Is This Autism? website
Dr. Donna Henderson’s website
Sarah Wayland’s website Guiding Exceptional Parents
Is This Autism? A Guide for Clinicians and Everyone Else by Dr. Donna Henderson and Dr. Sarah Wayland
Is This Autism? A Companion Guide for Diagnosing by Dr. Donna Henderson and Dr. Sarah Wayland (available July 2023)

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 113a: Psychologist Dr. Dawn Huebner on Helping Children Who Worry Too Much

9 juni 2023 | 37 min

I’m very excited to be talking with psychologist, parent coach, and prolific author Dawn Huebner. One of the coolest things about making this podcast is getting to continually connect with people whose work I’ve not only been following for years, but people whose work and books have literally impacted my family in a meaningful way. On top of that, I get to ask them everything I want to know. Hopefully I cover the same things that you would ask if you were sitting in my chair, too.

Today is one of those conversations, as we’ve owned and have been using Dawn’s books like What to Do When Your Temper Flares and What To Do When You Grumble Too Much for many years. Today Dawn and I are talking about her new book on anxiety called Outsmarting Worry: And Older Kid’s Guide to Overcoming Anxiety. Dawn has a gift for creating practical, doable, interactive “toolkits” to help feel empowered to take control of their emotional experience and make changes that can make the way they’re moving through life feel so much better. I hope you enjoy our conversation!

Dawn Huebner, PhD, is a Clinical Psychologist, Parent Coach and popular speaker, specializing in the many faces of childhood anxiety. Her newest book, Outsmarting Worry, maintains her distinctive voice while adding a layer of detail and sophistication appreciated by older children and teens.

THINGS YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:

What is “normal” worry for children and how will we know if our child needs help
How we can help our children shift from being “irrational” with worry to calm
What does the process of helping a child learn to manage their own worry and anxiety actually look like?
How might some parents be inadvertently exacerbating their child’s worry?
What is one simple skill we can teach our child today to help him or her start to tackle worry?
How can we help a child who is resistant to taking steps to learn how to manage their anxiety?

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Dr. Dawn Huebner’s website
Outsmarting Worry by Dawn Huebner
What to Do When Your Temper Flares by Dawn Huebner
What to Do When You Grumble Too Much by Dawn Huebner
What to Do When You Worry Too Much by Dawn Huebner

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 329: Julie Bogart on Moving Through Writing Resistance for Differently Wired Kids

6 juni 2023 | 43 min

Today’s episode features an eye-opening conversation with Julie Bogart on how to help kids who have resistance around writing, which, I have a hunch, is something many of you out there listening are familiar with. Julie, the mastermind behind the Brave Writer program, the Brave Writer podcast, and really thoughtful content on all things kids, writing, learning with confidence, and critical thinking, is the perfect person to explore this topic with.

What I thought might be an interview that focused on the nuts and bolts of writing ended up being a very moving and inspiring lesson about self-expression and trust. Julie and I talked about how separating the mechanical and self-expression parts of writing can help kids experience less resistance to writing, how to break through barriers students may have when it comes to expressing themselves, and what Julie identifies as performance anxiety at the heart of a child’s struggles to getting starting putting words down on the page. Julie also gave some fantastic advice on how to change the script around writing resistance and where to get started for parents experiencing this at home.

Julie Bogart is known for her common sense parenting and education advice. She’s the author of the beloved book, The Brave Learner, which has brought joy and freedom to countless home educators. Her new book, Raising Critical Thinkers, offers parents a lifeline in navigating the complex digital world our kids are confronting.

Julie’s also the creator of the award-winning, innovative online writing program called Brave Writer, now 22 years old, serving 191 countries.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What Brave Writer is and how it helps families looking to support their children in becoming more confident writers
How separating the mechanical and self-expression parts of writing can help kids experience less resistance
Julie’s thoughts on support systems and available assistive technology and how they influence kids’ relationships with writing
How to break through the resistance when children feel daunted by the idea of expressing themselves
Why Julie believes performance anxiety is at the root of resistance when kids struggle to begin a writing task
Advice for parents raising kids who experience intense resistance around the writing process

Resources mentioned

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 328: Autism Level UP co-founders Amy Laurent & Jacquelyn Fede on Learning From Autistic Self-Advocates

25 april 2023 | 33 min

To close out this season, I’m bringing you an interview with Amy Laurent and Jacquelyn Fede from Austim Level UP! I’m going to go out on a limb and say most of you have probably heard of Autism Level Up or heard Amy and Jacquelyn’s names before. Autism Level Up! Is a resource that I have personally spent hours pouring through because it’s so fantastic , accessible and informative. In this conversation I wanted to talk to Amy and Jacqueline about why they created Autism Level UP!, how the conversation surrounding autism and support for autistic people has changed over the past decade, and how we can all “level up” our own understanding of and experience with autism and neurodivergence.

About my guests

Jac is a super fun, super goofy and SUPER DUPER nerdy Autistic Advocate and the co-founder of Autism Level UP! Jac enjoys supporting Autistic Individuals and their partners as well as program evaluation, data and statistics, and app and web development. Jac is a physical activity junky and continues to meet its intense sensory needs by seeking high impact and highly resistant movements.

Amy is an OT, co-author of the SCERTS model (a developmental framework for supporting Autistic people), and the co-founder of Autism Level UP!. Amy enjoys supporting Autistic individuals and their partners, co-conspiring as an ally to Autistic people and creative design of useful and accessible tools and supports. Amy has many sensory needs that she meets through running, yoga, dance, paddle boarding and even resistance training as prescribed by her trainer, Jac.

Things you'll learn from this episode

The story behind Austin Level Up and how (and why) Amy and Jacquelyn created it
What the SCERTS model is and the ways in which Autism Level Up has reworked some of its aspects
What Autism Level Up is and how parents can engage with it
The difference between emotional regulation and energy regulation

Resources mentioned

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

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TPP 327: Debbie Reber Reflects on 7 Years of Tilt Parenting & the Tilt "Revolution" (Solocast)

18 april 2023 | 22 min

TPP 326: Educator Sam Young on Reimagining Socializing for Twice-Exceptional Students

11 april 2023 | 50 min

The world has changed so very much in the past few years, including in no small way how our kids relate to other kids. I get a pang of nostalgia when I think about how I used to form friendships when I was younger in a more analog world, but I can also feel excitement about the many possibilities that have opened up for kids like ours to find their communities thanks to the technology they’re growing up with.

In this episode, Sam Young is going to talk with us about what a meaningful and healthy social life might look like for our differently wired kids, and how we can support them in the process. We explored how online communities have impacted socializing for neurodivergent kids, how parents can support kids in developing the skills to help with social anxiety, key elements to look for in ideal social environments for our differently-wired kiddos, and much more.

Sam Young MEd is a growth-minded, two-time Fulbright Scholar and Director of Young Scholars Academy, a strength-based, talent-focused virtual enrichment center that supports twice-exceptional, neurodivergent, and gifted students and their families. Sam is a neurodivergent educator who has ADHD. As an ADHD learner, he has a tremendous understanding of, experience in, and respect for all things related to neurodiverse education. Before founding Young Scholars Academy, Sam taught in a variety of capacities—including nearly a decade at Bridges Academy—at an array of programs in the US, Europe, and Asia.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What reimagining our kids’ social life really is about
How online communities have impacted our kid’s social lives
What Sam’s students wish their social lives looked like
How parents or adults in kids' lives can support them in building skills to help them with social anxiety
Sam’s thoughts on social skill groups and their efficacy
Expectations that parents have that might be getting in the way of their kid’s social lives
How parents can support a kid who is feeling alone to the point of their self-confidence and self-worth being affected

Resources mentioned:

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 325: Akilah Richards on Raising Free People: Unschooling as Liberation and Healing Work

4 april 2023 | 40 min

I really enjoyed exploring unschooling, deschooling, freedom, and liberation with Akilah Richards, host of the Fare the Free Child podcast and author of the book Raising Free People: Unschooling as Liberation and Healing Work.

I reached out to Akilah after seeing her TED talk, which led me to her book, and then her podcast, and I knew I wanted to invite her to join me in conversation. A recurring theme in this podcast, and in Tilt, is doing our own inner work as parents, and I love how Akilah talks about relating our own reparenting to freedom, decolonization, and liberation.

Akilah shares her personal story of going from traditional schooling to unschooling to deschooling, and how she and her husband came to consider the idea of raising free people, what that means, and how they’ve navigated the realities of making unconventional choices that can sometimes make other people uncomfortable. She also shares how they think about the success and what a fulfilled life looks like for her family, as well as how her work aimed at decolonizing parenting has resonated with people worldwide.

About my guest:

Akilah S. Richards is passionate about mindful partnerships and decolonizing parenting. She uses audio and written mediums to amplify the ways that unschooling in particular, is serving as healing grounds and liberation work for Black, non-Black Indigenous, and People of Color communities earthwide. Her celebrated unschooling podcast, Fare of the Free Child, and the numerous workshops and gatherings she has been part of, have garnered the attention of Forbes Magazine, The New York Times, Good Morning America, and most importantly, BIPOC families interested or living in more healthy, consent-based, intergenerational relationships. Her recent experiences within the intersection of privilege, parenting,and power are detailed in her latest book, Raising Free People: Unschooling as Liberation and Healing Work.

You'll learn:

What it means to be raising a “free child” and why it can be a threatening or uncomfortable concept for many people
What “mad question asking” is and how parents can use it to get unstuck
How unschooling is tied to decolonization
What “deschooling” is versus “homeschooling” and “unschooling”
What “confident autonomy” is and why Akilah considers that a hallmark of “success” in her children
How Akilah and her partner dealt with the barriers (social, cultural, and more) when they chose the unschooling path for their family
What a “savor complex” is and how it can transform the family experience

Resources mentioned:

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

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TPP 324: A Conversation about Declarative Language and Co-Regulation, with Linda Murphy

28 mars 2023 | 46 min

For the past few years, I’ve been hearing about this concept called “declarative language,” and although I had an idea of what it was, after reading my guest Linda Murphy’s Declarative Language Handbook, I couldn’t wait to bring her on the show because it offers another transformational tool for our parenting differently wired kids’ toolbox.

Linda describes declarative language as a positive, thoughtful communication style that emphasizes understanding, patience, respect, and kindness, and as you’ll hear from our conversation, it is an ideal communication style for really all children, but especially neurodivergent children and kids whose nervous systems are triggered by demands or more imperative communication styles.

We discussed the different ways we can communicate with our children, the language we use, and the effects that simple shifts in the way we have conversations can have in our daily interactions with them. We also explored what is declarative language versus imperative language, as well as the relationship between co-regulation and declarative language and why we should use them in tandem.

Linda K. Murphy MS, CCC-SLP is a speech language pathologist and RDI® Consultant. She co-founded Peer Projects - Therapy From the Heart, a clinic in Beverly, MA dedicated to helping kids and families by using a positive, thoughtful communication style that emphasizes understanding, patience, respect, and kindness. Linda has been working with individuals with social learning differences for over 25 years. She leads trainings on the topic of social learning, has authored Declarative Language Handbook, Co-Regulation Handbook, numerous articles, and co-authored the book Social Thinking and Me with Michelle Garcia Winner.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What it means to use declarative language (versus imperative language)
Why declarative language is so effective for neurodivergent children, and especially those who are wired to be more demand avoidance
Why declarative language is more effective when paired with co-regulation
Common language and communication styles that place demands on kids that we may not be aware of (including questions)
How to introduce declarative language communication and how it can support a child’s learning and development
What we can hope to see in a child or an adolescent that has been on the receiving end of this style of communication
What to say instead of “Did you hear what I said”?

Resources mentioned

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

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TPP 323: Educator and Coach Sandi Lerman on Neurodiversity and Developmental Trauma

21 mars 2023 | 47 min

Over the past few years I’ve seen the word trauma become more and more prevalent in conversations surrounding children, especially differently wired children. So I invited trauma and education expert Sandi Lerman onto the show so we could talk about exactly what’s going on with our kids — have they or are they experiencing trauma at school? What is developmental trauma? What does trauma look like our children? And how can we respond to and support a child who has experienced trauma?

In the episode you’re about to listen to, Sandi explains why two kids might internalize an experience differently, how kids’ bodies hold on to trauma, and the relationship between PDA and trauma. Sandi also walks us through the key tenets of her trust-based, connected parenting method in her heart strong system.

About Sandi Lerman

Sandi Lerman, MA Ed. is the Founder and Program Director of Heart-Strong International, a global education company that provides training and coaching programs for parents and teachers of children with developmental trauma and professional graduate-level programs for Trauma-Informed Specialists, Certified Parent Coaches, and Certified Educational Trainers.

Sandi is an educator with over twenty years of classroom teaching experience in K-12, university, and adult education settings, has worked as a parent coach and educator since 2014, and has coordinated two state-wide government and non-profit parenting and community mental health education programs in Indiana.The creator of the HEART-STRONG Model™, Sandi uses trauma-informed coach training and somatic healing practices in her work with adults and those who parent, teach, and take care of children and teens, along with practical tools and strategies to support their growth and success.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What developmental trauma is
Whether neurodivergent kids are more likely to experience trauma or have their “little t” traumas impact them in more profound ways
Why two different kids might internalize the same experience differently
How are our kids' bodies hold on to trauma and what that looks like
How PDA (pathological demand avoidance) is connected to developmental trauma
Specific modalities are most helpful for recovery for kids who have experienced trauma
What the path toward healing from childhood trauma looks like

Resources mentioned for Neurodiversity and Developmental Trauma

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TPP 322: Gentle Parenting Expert Sarah Moore Talks About Peaceful Discipline

14 mars 2023 | 50 min

My guest today is Sarah Moore, the author of the new book Peaceful Discipline: Story Teaching, Brain Science & Better Behavior. Sarah explains what peaceful discipline is and walk us through its relationships with the traditional disciplinary tools many parents rely on when navigating tricky behavior, like time outs and consequences. Sarah also explained the power of using story teaching to help kids create positive coherent narratives for difficult situations, no matter how old they are, as a way to create the opportunity for learning and growth as opposed to experiences being internalized in harmful ways.

Sarah R. Moore is the author of “Peaceful Discipline: Story Teaching, Brain Science & Better Behavior,” and founder of Dandelion Seeds Positive Parenting. She is a Master Trainer in conscious parenting and has training in child development, trauma recovery, and interpersonal neurobiology.

Things you'll learn from this episode:

How Sarah defines peaceful discipline
What the H.U.G. process is and how we can use it to support our child’s healthy emotional development
How to reframe our thinking about traditional discipline tools like timeouts (and shift to employing “time ins”)
How to effectively tap into natural consequences as a positive tool in our parenting
Why removing a device or toy isn't actually a natural consequence that works long term
What Story Teaching is and how we can use it as a tool to support our child in creating coherent positive narrative about difficult situations

Resources mentioned for:

Sarah Moore’s website, Dandelion Seeds
Peaceful Discipline: Story Teaching, Brain Science, and Better Behavior by Sarah R. Moore
Dandelion Seeds Positive Parenting Blog, Mini-Courses & Expert Interviews
Dandelion Seeds on Instagram
Dandelion Seeds on Facebook
Dandelion Seeds on YouTube
Dandelion Seeds on Twitter
Sign up at Sarah’s website for one free mini-course (more than 40 topics available) and a selection of expert interviews

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
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TPP 321: Chris Balme on How Parents Can Navigate the Tricky Middle School Years

7 mars 2023 | 39 min

Middle school might not feel like a very enchanting time in our lives — it definitely didn’t feel that way for me when I was living through it. But according to my guest Chris Balme, middle school is a time of great magic and opportunity for our kids, and for us as parents, if we know what we’re looking for.

In our conversation, Chris explains the three stages of identity development a child goes through in middle school, how we as parents will want to adapt our parenting styles change as our kids reach these stages, and how to navigate our child breaking our trust. We also talked about what individuation is and what it means to become a better companion for our kids, which is a reframe I really love.

Chris Balme is an education leader and writer, passionate about helping young people discover more of their human potential. As Co-Founder and Head of School at Millennium School, a lab school in San Francisco, Chris helped pioneer new learning methods for middle schoolers, based in developmental science. Chris then founded Argonaut, an online program to bring social-emotional learning to more students. He now serves as the Founding Principal of Hakuba International School in Japan, developing learning approaches that foster human and environmental well-being.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Why Chris believes the middle school years are magical
What the three stages of identity development for middle school students are how kids may progress through them
What individuation is and how to navigate it with your children
Advice for parents regarding scaffolding in a way that supports their child’s development
How to navigate a child breaking our trust
What companioning is and how to do that for our kids

Resources mentioned

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
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TPP 009a: 11-Year-Old Asher and Debbie on the Importance of Morning Routines

3 mars 2023 | 17 min

In this special kid’s POV edition, I share a short conversation with my 11-year-old child Asher about the new morning routine we began doing in January 2016.

The routine is based on author and speaker Hal Elrod’s book The Miracle Morning: The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM). Because I’m always looking for ways to support Asher in developing more self-awareness, we agreed to start off the New Year trying out a new routine.

In this episode, Asher walks listeners through what the new 6-step morning routine—consisting of meditation, affirmations, visualization, exercise, reading, and journaling—looks like, and explains its impact, as well as why Asher thinks other kids would benefit.

Debbie Reber is the founder of Tilt and the host of the Tilt Parenting Podcast. 11-year-old Asher is Debbie’s child and is regularly featured on the podcast.

Things you'll learn from the episode:

How implementing a purposeful morning routine such as the one highlighted in Hal Elrod’s book The Miracle Morning has the potential to positively impact a child’s day
The benefits for children on beginning each day by focusing on presence, positivity, and intention
Asher’s thoughts on whether other kids could benefit from a new morning routine like the one he’s doing
How meaningful a change can be when a child is self-motivated by their own personal discoveries about the benefits of a new habit

Resources mentioned:

The Miracle Morning: The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM) by Hal Elrod
Pat Flynn’s podcast, Smart Passive Income
Kerbal Space Program, Asher’s favorite online game (at the moment)
Asher and Debbie’s visualization soundtrack: Enya’s Caribbean Blue, Charles Atlas’ The Snow Before Us, and Badly Drawn Boy’s I Love NYE

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
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TPP 320: Dr. Karen Wilson on How (and When) to Talk to Kids About Their Diagnoses

28 februari 2023 | 43 min

I know that there are concerns among many families that their child’s self-esteem can be negatively impacted by a label, or that others, including teachers may treat a child differently if they know they have one or more diagnoses, especially because of the stigma associated with neurodifferences. So this is what Dr. Karen Wilson and I get into — demystifying the process and offering suggestions for approaching these important conversations.

In our conversation, Karen breaks down the kind of language we can use when talking with kids about their diagnosis, as well as how that conversation will likely continue to evolve as our kids get older. We also talked about how to navigate this process with a child or teen who is resistant to labels, why it’s critical that we have all of these conversations from a foundation of prioritizing and recognizing strengths. and how to have this conversation in a household with neurotypical siblings.

Dr. Karen Wilson is a Clinical Neuropsychologist, Director of West LA Neuropsychology, PC, the founder of ChildNEXUS.com, and the host of the Diverse Thinking · Different Learning podcast. She specializes in the assessment of neurodevelopmental disorders in children and adolescents, and she has extensive experience evaluating children and adults who present with neurological, medical and psychiatric disorders.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What a diagnosis actually is and what it can mean to a family
How to balance communication surrounding your child’s areas of strengths and weaknesses so the emphasis is not on challenges
What types of language to use when talking with your kids about their diagnoses, and how to evolve language as kids get older
How to navigate talking with children and teens about their neurodifferences if they’re resistant to labels or being “otherized”
Best practices for talking about diagnoses in households with neurotypical siblings
How to give kids the tools and empowerment they need to ultimately feel confident navigating situations in their lives where they are judged by their diagnosis and related stigma

Resources mentioned

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 319: Dr. Gail Post on the Gifted Parenting Journey and Support for Families of Gifted Children

21 februari 2023 | 43 min

In this episode, we are diving in to the realities of parenting gifted and 2e kids. Gail and I talked about the common challenges parents raising gifted and 2e kids experience as part of their journey, why it can sometimes feel uncomfortable to celebrate our child’s accomplishments with others and how that impacts our kids and us, and how to handle our own expectations and pressures we may experience because of our child’s unique learning profile. We also explore what many families of gifted kids experience as a complicated relation with the word “potential,” as well as how we as parents can manage our own uncomfortable emotions that may arise in parenting our kids, including anxiety, envy, and guilt.

Gail Post, Ph.D. is a Clinical Psychologist, parenting coach and consultant, workshop leader, and writer. She is also a Clinical Associate Professor of Psychiatry at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine In practice for over 35 years, she provides psychotherapy with a focus on the needs of the intellectually and musically gifted and twice-exceptional, parenting coaching and workshops, and consultation with educators and psychotherapists. Dr. Post is the parent of two gifted young adults and served as co-chair of a gifted parents advocacy group when her children were in school. Her writing includes articles, several book chapters, and a long-standing blog, Gifted Challenges. Her new book, The Gifted Parenting Journey: A Guide to Self-discovery and Support for Families of Gifted Children, combines research, theory, and clinical experience, and extends her advocacy efforts to address the needs of parents of gifted children.

Things you'll learn from this episode

The common challenges parents raising gifted and 2e kids may experience as part of their journey
Why parents of gifted kids feel intense pressure surrounding their child’s educational path and how that can negatively impact families
Why the word “potential” is a loaded one in families with gifted and 2e kids, and how parents can change their relationship with this concept
Why anxiety is common amongst parents raising gifted or 2e kids
The unique challenges BIPOC parents raising gifted kids face
Why self-awareness is the road map to attuned parenting when raising gifted and 2e kids

Resources mentioned

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
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TPP 004a: Psychologist Kate Berger on What Mindfulness Can Do for Kids

17 februari 2023 | 33 min

For this episode, I sit down with Kate Berger, a child and adolescent psychologist, Mindfulness instructor, and owner of the Netherlands-based therapy practice, Expat Kids’ Club, for a conversation about the benefits of mindfulness in kids and ideas for how to begin weaving mindfulness into our families’ lives.

Kate is heavily engaged in the movement to bring mindfulness into schools and other children’s communities, and is a big believer in the benefits of mindfulness in kids, especially with regards to emotional and mental well-being, both in school and in their inner lives.

Kate Berger, MSc is a child and adolescent psychologist, consultant, and the founder of The Expat Kids Club which has provided counsel to hundreds of youngsters and, their families, as well as major corporations, from the U.K., Germany, Singapore, and the U.S. Kate is also the Co-Chair & Co-Founder of the Families In Global Transition affiliate in The Netherlands, and is a dedicated mindfulness meditation practitioner and certified instructor who teaches mindfulness to young people through the collaborative Mindfulness International.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

What mindfulness actually is
Why developing a mindfulness practice is a natural fit for children
How mindfulness can specifically benefit differently-wired kids
How mindfulness can support a parent in especially intense or difficult moments
Tips and ideas for introducing, encouraging, and supporting a mindfulness practice in your family

Resources mentioned for Mindfulness for Kids

Kate Berger’s practice The Expat Kids’ Club
Mindfulness in Schools Project
Mindful Schools
MindUP Foundation
Sitting Still Like a Frog (book)
Headspace mindfulness app (iTunes)
“When Mindfulness Meets the Classroom” (The Atlantic Article)
Free mindfulness course through Future Learn

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 318: What Parents Need to Know about the IEP Process, with Therapist Beth Liesenfeld

14 februari 2023 | 45 min

If you are a parent of a neurodivergent kid with a diagnosed learning disability, you likely have had experience with Individualized Education Plans, otherwise known as IEPs. And if this is you, my hunch is you have some feelings about IEPs and the whole process — the stresses, the unknowns, the fact that it might feel like you have to understand a completely different language just to get the services and supports your child needs and deserves in schools.

I invited occupational therapist Beth Liesenfeld of The IEP Lab to answer your questions around how parents can better prepare for an IEP meeting, what actually makes a good IEP, and how we can go about making changes on an IEP if we realize the accommodations aren’t being effective or if a school isn’t following through in a way the IEP outlines.

Beth is an incredibly knowledgeable expert on the subject of IEPs, and as you’ll hear, she’s truly passionate about providing “insider” information of the school’s process and culture to parents in order to increase collaboration between parents and school staff. Through her school experience, Beth saw inequity in parents' ability to advocate for a quality IEP for their child and now teaches parents a 4-step process to effectively advocate for their children within the schools through online workshops and interactive, supportive online courses.

Beth Liesenfeld, MOT, OTR/L is an occupational therapist passionate about providing “insider” information of the school’s process and culture to parents in order to increase collaboration between parents and school staff! Her company, The IEP Lab, provides online workshops and courses as well as produces The Parent IEP Lab Podcast.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What parents actually need to know before they go into an IEP meeting
The criteria for designing an effective and supportive IEP
The intention behind the goals written into any IEP, and how to create goals that lead to hoped for outcomes
What parents can do if their children’s school doesn’t follow through on the accommodations provided in their child’s IEP
How to include accommodations for students who are struggling with school refusal and therefore may not be meeting attendance requirements
What the IDEA says about seeking an IEP for twice-exceptional children who may be performing “adequately” but aren’t reaching their potential

Resources mentioned for the IEP Process

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
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TPP 001a: Margaret Webb on Parenting the Child You Didn't Expect When You Were Expecting

10 februari 2023 | 39 min

TPP 317: A Conversation About Autistic Burnout with Neurodivergent Support Specialist Kristy Forbes

7 februari 2023 | 50 min

I’m honored to kick off the season with a powerful conversation about autistic burnout with autism and neurodiversity support specialist, Kristy Forbes. Kristy and I talk about what exactly autistic burnout is and how it presents, why “deep rest” is critical for someone experiencing autistic burnout, and how autistic burnout is differentiated from mood disorders or depression. We also talk frankly about the challenges of seeing burnout in autistic children through a neuronormative lens, and how that may lead to therapies and strategies that may be the opposite of what a child in autistic burnout actually needs.

Kristy Forbes is an Australian-based autism & neurodiversity support specialist with experience working with clients both nationally and internationally. This includes neurodivergent people and their families; and professionals who wish to support them, such as educators, psychologists, pediatricians, allied health professionals, support workers and integration aides.

Kristy is formally identified autistic, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) as well as being a parent to four neurodivergent children.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What autistic burnout is and how it's different from other types of burnout
How mental health challenges might be misinterpreted in autistic burnout treatment
How to support young people, adolescents, and children in recognizing the value of taking pause and resting
Clues to help parents have a better understanding of what their child is struggling with
Examples of what deep rest might look like for children and young people
How to recognize when your child is starting to emerge from burnout

Resources mentioned for Autistic Burnout

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
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TPP 153a: Casey O'Roarty of Joyful Courage on Calming the Drama in Our Homes

23 december 2022 | 48 min

Today I’m bringing back to the podcast a guest who has much goodness to offer our community, Casey O’Roarty, a positive discipline trainer, parent coach, author, and host of the Joyful Courage podcast. Casey is just about to publish her first book, a passion project called Joyful Courage: Calming the Drama and Taking Control of Your Parenting Journey. I had the opportunity to read an advance copy, and I absolutely loved how accessible, tangible, and real it is.

As you’ll hear in our conversation, Casey has insights and strategies that are powerful for parents raising challenging kids, and she paints a realistic and doable picture of how we can truly calm the drama happening at home and in our families, as well as find more peace in the day to day.

Casey O’Roarty, M Ed, is a facilitator of personal growth and development. Her work encourages parents to discover the purpose of their journey, while also providing them with tools and a shift of mindset that allows them to deepen their relationships with themselves and their families. As a former teacher, and a Certified Positive Discipline Trainer since 2007, Casey has led countless groups through workshops and classes that have left them feeling empowered and excited about parenting. She also offers an engaging podcast, live and online classes, and individual coaching at www.joyfulcourage.com. Casey lives in the Pacific Northwest with greatest teachers – her husband, and two teenage kids.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

Why Casey wrote her book and what she hopes it does in the world
The core ideas behind Jane Nelsen’s philosophy of Positive Discipline
What truly understanding that we as parents are not alone in our journey does for us
How mindfully paying attention to the body helps us calm the drama at home in difficult moments
The way using words such as “never” and “always” can negatively impact our parenting experience
How to develop the muscle of “noticing” and how this simple concept can have a profound impact in our families
The power of the intentional pause

Resources mentioned for calming the drama at home

Joyful Courage (Casey’s website)
Joyful Courage: Calming the Drama and Taking Control of Your Parenting Journey by Casey O’Roarty
Joyful Courage podcast
How Positive Discipline Can Help Atypical Children Thrive (podcast episode)
Positive Discipline (Jane Nelsen’s website)
Love and Love with Joyful Courage (Facebook Group)
Joyful Courage Parents of Teens (Facebook Group)
Joyful Courage on Instagram

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 316: Dr. Tamar Chansky on How to Free Our Children from Negative Thinking

20 december 2022 | 49 min

In this episode, we’re talking about negative thinking and how to help kids who are more “glass half empty” thinkers shift their mindset. My guest is the woman who literally wrote the book on the subject, psychologist Dr. Tamar Chansky, author of Freeing Your Child from Negative Thinking.

Tamar and I talked about what negative thinking is, whether it is possible to change, how to respond when our child is venting their unhappiness or negative thoughts to us, and Tamar’s four steps to combating negative thinking. There’s a good chance that we as the parents and caregivers and adults in the room have our own work to do when it comes to hyperfocusing or dwelling on negative thoughts, so we explore that as well. Honestly, I’ve listened to this episode 3 times already – once recording it, and two more times before releasing it because it’s packed with so many nuggets that I personally need to hear right now. I hope it lands for you the same way.

Dr. Tamar Chansky, is a psychologist and a writer on a mission to teach kids, adults, and couples how to make the mind a safer place to live by changing their relationship to anxiety one thought at a time. In 1999. Tamar founded Children’s and Adult Center for OCD and Anxiety in Plymouth Meeting, PA. In addition to the book we’re talking about today, Tamar is the author of Freeing Your Child from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Freeing Your Child from Anxiety, and Freeing Yourself from Anxiety.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Whether or not neurodivergent kids are more prone to negative thinking than neurotypical kids
What the definition of negative thinking is
Whether it’s possible for a child whose default mode is “glass half-empty” thinking to become more optimistic
What the negative patterns are that we are trying to disrupt when working on negative thinking with our kids
Whether venting is something that encourages negative thinking or not
The four steps to combat negative thinking
How to navigate the balance of protecting children from adversity and exposing them to the nature of the world around us

Resources mentioned:

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
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TPP 070a: Family Therapist Neil Brown Talks About Parental Burnout

16 december 2022 | 40 min

This week I bring back to the show Neil Brown, a licensed clinical social worker, the author of Ending the Parent-Teen Control Battle: Resolve the Power Struggle and Build Trust, Responsibility, and Respect, and host of the Healthy Family Connections Podcast.

When I last had Neil on the show, we talked about control battles with teens, and if you haven’t listened to that episode, I highly encourage you to go back and check it out here. In today’s episode, we’re tackling an equally important topic, and one I think will resonate deeply with our audience here: Parental Burnout.

In our conversation, Neil will explain what exactly parental burnout is and how it negatively impacts parents and families, tell us how to identify it, and share his strategies for recovering from it. If you regularly feel frustrated and exhausted and are experiencing high levels of stress in relation to your parenting life, this is an episode you will definitely want to listen to.

Neil D. Brown, LCSW, is a psychotherapist who has worked with families, couples, and individuals for more than thirty years. Deeply steeped in the theory and practice of family therapy, Brown uses a systemic approach that allows him to understand the system, or context, in which problems are both formed and are healed. This approach has revealed a simple yet profound method of empowering parents and their adolescent youth to put an end to destructive control battles for good. Brown is also a trainer of parents and mental health professionals. Additionally, Brown works in industry with teams and work groups to increase organizational effectiveness.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

What parental burnout is and why parents of differently-wired kids are especially susceptible to it
The importance of making sure our emotional needs are met when it comes to preventing burnout
Why moms experience parental burnout more frequently than dads
What recovery from parental burnout looks like, and how long it takes
How to help teens with a fixed mindset develop a growth mindset

Resources mentioned for burned out parents

Neil Brown’s website
Ending the Parent-Teen Control Battle: Resolve the Power Struggle and Build Trust, Responsibility, and Respect by Neil Brown
Healthy Family Connections Podcast (Neil’s podcast)

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 315: Dr. Lori Desautels on Rewiring Our Perceptions of Discipline in Schools, and at Home

13 december 2022 | 43 min

I found about Lori’s work recently and after reading her book Connections over Compliance: Rewiring our Perceptions of Discipline, I really wanted to bring her on as a guest because I believe the work she is doing is revolutionary.

Lori’s work centers around helping educators, parents, and any adults who work with children shift the way they think about discipline by reaching for sustainable behavioral changes through brain state awareness rather than compliance and obedience. She’s actively pushing back against reactive and punitive practices that can potentially reactivate the developing stress response systems of children, and is advocating for stronger co-regulation practices and regulated brain and body states for adults.

During this conversation, we consider why there is such a powerful foundational belief that discipline and punishment go together, what happens when the traditional methods of punishment are imposed on children who are coming to school with trauma or a heightened nervous system, and why it’s so important for educators to take responsibility over their own nervous system regulation.

About Dr. Lori Desautels

Dr. Lori Desautels, has been an Assistant Professor at Butler University since 2016 where she teaches both undergraduate and graduate programs in the College of Education.

Lori’s passion is engaging her students through the social and relational neurosciences as it applies to education by integrating the Applied Educational Neuroscience framework, and its learning principles and practices into her coursework at Butler.

Lori is the author of 4 books. Her most recent book, Connections over Compliance: Rewiring our Perceptions of Discipline was released in late 2020. Her new book will be published in January, 2023 entitled, “Intentional Neuroplasticity, Our Educational Journey Towards Post Traumatic Growth.”

Things you'll learn from this episode

Why there is such a powerful foundational belief that discipline and punishment go together
What happens when the traditional methods of punishment are imposed on children who are coming to school with traumas or a heightened nervous system
Why we should be moving away from the behavior management model
Why it’s so important for educators to take responsibility over their own nervous system regulation
Strategies for helping teachers (and parents) better show up for dysregulated kids

Resources mentioned

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 146a: Self-Directed Learning Advocate Blake Boles on Unschooling

9 december 2022 | 37 min

My guest this week is Blake Boles, the self-directed learning advocate behind Unschool Adventures and the author of several books on unschooling, including The Art of Self-Directed Learning, Better Than College, and College Without High School, as well as the host of the Off-Trail Learning podcast.

Now… you may be reading this and thinking, I’m not homeschooling my child or “unschooling” isn’t my thing. But I’m going to encourage you to listen to what Blake has to say. Because regardless of your child’s educational circumstances, there is wisdom to be gleaned from Blake’s philosophy on self-directed learning and helping our kids grow up into intrinsically motivated humans who understand themselves and are driven to seek out the information and resources they need to achieve their goals. I also love that Blake’s approach beautifully challenges those traditional timelines that our differently wired kids often don’t meet anyway. So… have a listen and let me know what you think. I’m curious to hear how this lands with you.

Blake Boles is the founder and director of Unschool Adventures and the author of The Art of Self-Directed Learning, Better Than College, and College Without High School. He hosts the Off-Trail Learning podcast, speaks for alternative schools, writes for The Alliance for Self-Directed Education, and has keynoted multiple homeschooling conferences.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

What unschooling actually is (in comparison with traditional or eclectic homeschooling)
The most common myths and assumptions surrounding unschooled kids
How intrinsic motivation is the key to helping a student learn what they want to learn when they’re ready to learn it
The ways in which unschooling and self-directed learning respects a child’s unique timeline
What the transition from a traditional educational model to unschooling might look like might look like
What a transition to university looks like in the U.S. for children who’ve been homeschooled, and how to do it
How parents who are homeschooling their child can play the role as “consultant” rather than teacher, and giving child the room to become truly self-directed
Tips for parents looking to dip their toe into unschooling

Resources mentioned for what is unschooling?

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 314: Dr. Abigail Gewirtz on Helping Kids Find Hope & Optimism in the Most Challenging Times

6 december 2022 | 37 min

Since my guest for today’s episode, Dr. Abigail Gewirtz was on the show just over two years ago near the start of the COVID pandemic, the world has continued to go through increasingly complicated and challenging times.

Like I’m sure all of you out there listening, I’ve struggled to find ways to help my child feel hope and optimism about the state of the world — the war in Ukraine, a spate of school shootings, a very polarized political landscape, and catastrophic weather events.

So I wanted to ask Abigail, the author of the wonderful book When the World Feels Like a Scary Place: Essential Conversations for Anxious Parents and Worried Kids, if hope and optimism is possible to find even when things around us feel so unpredictable and chaotic, and if so, how can we cultivate this for our kids in an authentic way?

In our conversation, Abigail shares her ideas for doing that, as well as ways we adults can manage our own fear and worries to be able to show up for our kids, and the importance of guiding kids toward something that makes them feel purpose and meaning.

Dr. Abigail Gewirtz is a child psychologist and professor at the University of Minnesota’s College of Education and Human Development (ranked the world’s third-leading institution of its kind).

Dr. Gewirtz has consulted for and presented to national and international organizations, including the US Congress and UNICEF, on parenting. Dr. Gewirtz’s most recent book is When the World Feels Like a Scary Place: Essential Conversations for Anxious Parents and Worried Kids.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What Abigail is seeing in her work over the past two years regarding of the state of the world and the impact on kids and families
How adults can manage their own pain, fear, and worries so they can show up for their kids
Whether it’s possible for our kids to feel optimism in the midst of growing up in a heavy and difficult times
How to guide a child toward identifying something that could help them feel a sense of purpose and meaning
What happens in our kids' developing brains when they consume content that reinforces pessimism and division
What leading kids with negative mindsets toward hope might look like

Resources mentioned:

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 060a: A Deep Dive Into Assessments, Diagnoses, and Labels, with Melissa Neff, PhD

2 december 2022 | 46 min

In this episode, I talk with Dr. Melissa Neff, a licensed clinical psychologist in private practice in Missoula, MT in the United States who specializes in conducting psychological evaluations with children (ages 6-18) and adults. A lot of Melissa’s practice focuses on helping parents figure out what’s going on with their children and diagnosing things like ADHD and autism, although she shared with me that one of her favorite aspects of her practice lately is working with girls who are on the spectrum.

There are so many things I could have talked about with Melissa, but for today’s episode, we focused our conversation on the diagnostic process—what it involves and when and how parents can take the steps they need to pursue a diagnosis—as well as the pros and cons of getting a diagnoses, and more specifically, of having one or more labels attached to a child, both in their educational journey, as well as their lives as they grow into adults.

Melissa Neff, Ph.D received her Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology in 2008 from the University of Montana following the completion of an APA-approved pre-doctoral internship at Spokane Mental in Spokane, WA. She has extensive training in working with children and adults of all ages. Her areas of specialty are the diagnostic evaluation of psychological disorders and the assessment and treatment of trauma. Dr. Neff also has extensive experience in testing for ADHD, autism spectrum disorders, mood disorders, personality disorders, and anxiety disorders. She utilizes a strengths-based approach in her work in an attempt to foster resilience, preferring a team-centered approach to assessment and intervention.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

The typical / “best” ages for kids to be assessed
What some of the early signs are that a child might be on the autism spectrum
How subjective is the process of assessing / diagnosing a child?
What makes a “good diagnosis?”
Why the current diagnostic process isn’t catching everyone, especially girls (for both autism and ADHD)
The value of a diagnosis or label—pros and cons
Tips for navigating the process of getting a diagnosis

Resources mentioned for the assessment process for kids

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TPP 313: Dr. Devorah Heitner on Online Safety and Internet “Rabbit Holes” and Differently Wired Kids

29 november 2022 | 43 min

Today is an important conversation about online communities and internet rabbit holes. And I felt pulled to tackle this topic for the show because I know that the past few years in particularly has been a time where differently wired kids have been a) spending a LOT more time online and connecting with people they may not have even meant in real life, and b) doing their identity development largely online as a result of COVID. And I also know that this can put our kids, and us as their parents and caregivers, in challenging positions as we navigate a seemingly endless stream of discourse that may lead our kids down the wrong paths.

So I asked my friend and screen and tech expert Dr. Devorah Heitner to join me for a frank and open conversation about it all. We talked about the ways differently wired kids might be exposed to harmful content, and why our kids may be more susceptible to toxic or unhealthy virtual rabbit holes in the first place, the popular places where teens and kids are hanging out the most right now, the way our kids’ worldview and their brain development is impacted they content their engaging with, and what we parents might not know that we should know about regarding this topic.

Dr. Devorah Heitner is the author of Screenwise: Helping Kids Thrive (and Survive) in Their Digital World and her book on navigating Privacy and Reputation with kids and teens, Growing Up in Public will be out in 2023 with Penguin Random House.

Dr. Heitner’s work has appeared in the New York Times, the Washington Post, The Wall Street Journal, and CNN Opinion. She has a Ph.D. in Media/Technology & Society from Northwestern University and has taught at DePaul and Northwestern.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Why differently wired kids are more vulnerable to Internet rabbit holes
The places online where today’s teens and kids are hanging out the most right now
Whether it’s possible to set up controls to manage the type of contents kids are accessing on sites like Reddit
The way our kids’ worldview and their brain development is impacted by engaging with potentially toxic content
What parents don’t know about what's going on with their kids and the way that they're accessing content

Resources mentioned for Unmasking Autism

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TPP 156a: Eric Lanigan Explains How to Make Peace with Video Gaming

25 november 2022 | 43 min

Are you worried about your child’s video gaming habits? If so, here’s interesting conversation with Eric Lanigan about two topics that I know are relevant, and perhaps concerning, to many listeners out there — video gaming and motivation. I reached out to Eric after learning about an online course he runs for parents called Making Peace with Gaming, because I was curious to know just exactly how we do that, and what that actually means in the context of everyday life with kids who are really into gaming. What I love about this conversation is it went so much deeper than video gaming and into the heart of the emotional lives of our children. I found our conversation to be highly thought-provoking—I hope you get a lot out of it.

Eric Lanigan is a Motivation Coach who has helped hundreds of people to get clear on what they want -and then do it. He guides his clients in directing their attention inwards instead of blaming themselves or external events. A former video game addict himself, Eric offers an intimate view of the world of compulsive gaming. Eric has delivered dozens of workshops on emotional intelligence, motivation, and procrastination. His online course, The Big Shift, has served over 750 people from more than 15 countries.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

Why many children get so deeply involved in their video game worlds
The emotional payoff many children get from engaging in games
Eric’s ideas around how parents can respect and understand their child’s video gaming
The connection between motivation and gaming, and what parents miss when considering these
Why Eric says the problem isn’t the games themselves but the way we relate to the games
The biggest fears and concerns parents have surrounding their child’s gaming
Eric’s thoughts on parents legislating their children’s gaming and how rewards and punishments associated with gaming may be counterproductive / result in the opposite desired outcome

Resources mentioned for parents worried about their child’s video gaming

Eric Lanigan’s website
Making Peace with Gaming online course*
The Big Shift online course
Blake Boles
A Conversation with Blake Boles on Unschooling and Self-Directed Learning (podcast episode)
Asher Talks About the Pros and Cons of Banning Video Games (podcast episode)
Eric on Facebook

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TPP 312: Todd Adams on How Men Can Better Show Up for Their Kids and Families

22 november 2022 | 41 min

This episode explores the subject of vulnerability, male culture, and parenting specifically in the context of heteronormative relationships and how men can show up as better dads to their differently wired children. And I have the perfect guest to explore this topic with — Todd Adams, half of the duo of Zen Parenting Radio, and a leadership coach for men and the executive director of the international men’s organization, Men Living.

Todd and I looked at the societal norms and pressures on men that get in the way of their being vulnerable in their relationships, feel more connected at home, and hold emotional space for their families, especially in families with neurodivergent kids and where the demands on relationships (emotionally, mentally, and physically) may be more intense. We also talked about what women can do to support and encourage their male partners to do inner work and show up as dads in a way that will better support their relationships and their family as a whole.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What the a “man box” is (and how it differs from “toxic masculinity”)
The barriers in a heteronormative relationship that stand in the way of men feeling connected, including the additional challenges when raising a differently wired child
How families can benefit from men showing up and being more vulnerable in their relationships
What women can do to encourage their male partners to do the work and how they can support them through it
How dads can find other like-minded dads and connect with them

Resources mentioned for dads, the "man box" and how men can better show up for their kids and families

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

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TPP 145a: What Coaches Need to Understand About Their Differently Wired Athletes

18 november 2022 | 41 min

If you have a differently wired child who is athletic and/or is into sports, this episode is for you. My guest is Susan Stout, the founder Own Beat Athlete, a new resource aimed at helping athletic coaches understand their athletes who march to a different beat. Susan knows from personal experience as an athlete herself, a former coach, and the parent of an athletic differently wired child, that many great athletes can be challenging to coach because of their wiring—they can be easily frustrated, disruptive, forgetful, inconsistent. But she also knows that they can be a teams’ greatest asset. Susan’s goal is to equip others with what she wishes she knew when she was a coach, and support and bring out the best in the many athletes who didn’t fit the mold, with a specific focus on athletes with ADHD, learning differences, and anxiety.

This is a really interesting conversation and Susan’s resources are a great starting point for listeners who want to bridge that gap of knowledge between their child’s behavior and their sports coach. I hope you enjoy it.

Susan Stout is an advocate for athletes who are wired differently and struggle to participate or reach their potential in sports. She specializes in ADHD, learning differences and anxiety. Susan is the founder of Own Beat Athlete, a project to provide athletic coaches with the understanding and tools they need to help their differently wired athletes thrive. She brings to the work her perspective as a swimmer, coach, teacher, lawyer and mom to an avid and talented young athlete with ADHD and dyslexia.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

How and when parents should let athletic coaches know about a child’s wiring
What kind of unique gifts differently wired athletes bring to their sports
What the common challenges are for differently wired kids participating in sports
How parents can talk with their kids about learning how to self-advocate for themselves with their coaches
Susan’s thoughts on how willing coaches are to better understand and support their differently wired athletes
How Own Beat Athlete supports coaches (and parents of athletes) to know how to practically support and problem solve with challenges related to neurodifferences
What parents should look for to know whether or not they should step in

Resources mentioned for coaching differently wired athletes

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

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TPP 311: Deb Dana on Befriending Our Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory

15 november 2022 | 43 min

If you are a regular listener of this show, you will be familiar with Polyvagal Theory, as it’s coming up in multiple interviews. But this episode is the first one dedicated solely to exploring this powerful theory. And to explore it with us, I’m thrilled to be talking with Deb Dana, a clinician, consultant, and author who is known for being a translator of Polyvagal Theory, which was developed by Dr. Stephen Porges in the mid-1990s.

In this episode, Deb Dana gives us a primer of the key points of Polyvagal Theory, and in doing so, explains the ways in which it can support the way we parent our differently-wired kids. Deb explains the nervous system pathways, why co-regulation is essential to our survival, what befriending and listening to our autonomic nervous system looks like in practice, and the benefits of having a breathing practice. We also talk about why these concepts can change our relationships to our daily life even if our circumstances stay the same.

Deb Dana, LCSW is a clinician, consultant and author specializing in complex trauma. Her work is focused on using the lens of Polyvagal Theory to understand and resolve the impact of trauma, and creating ways of working that honor the role of the autonomic nervous system. She is a founding member of the Polyvagal Institute, consultant to Khiron Clinics, advisor to Unyte, and developer of the signature Rhythm of Regulation Clinical Training Series. Deb is well known for translating Polyvagal Theory into a language and application that is both understandable and accessible for clinicians and curious people alike.

Deb’s clinical work published with W.W. Norton includes The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy: Engaging the Rhythm of Regulation, Polyvagal Exercises for Safety and Connection: 50 Client Centered Practices, the Polyvagal Flip Chart: Understanding the Science of Safety and the Polyvagal Card Deck: 58 Practices for Calm and Change.

Things you'll learn from this episode

-The mission behind Deb’s book Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory
-What the nervous system pathways are and the three states we can be in
-What aspects of our nervous systems are innate or “hardwired” versus routed in nurture or life experience
-Why co-regulation is essential to our survival and examples for ways in which we constantly do naturally
-What befriending and listening to our autonomic nervous system looks like in practice
-What the benefits of having a regular breathing practice are

Resources Mentioned

-Deb Dana’s website, Rhythm of Regulation
-Anchored: How to Befriend Your Nervous System Using Polyvagal Theory by Deb Dana
-Polyvagal Card Deck: 58 Practices for Calm & Change
-Polyvagal Exercises for Safety and Connection: 50 Client-Centered Practices by Deb Dana
-Polyvagal Practices: Anchoring the Self in Safety by Deb Dana (coming March 2023)
-Stephen Porges

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TPP 052a: Dietitian and Nutritionist Jill Castle with the Facts About ADHD and Nutrition

11 november 2022 | 41 min

For this episode about ADHD and nutrition, I spoke with one of America’s leading experts in the field of childhood nutrition, Jill Castle. Jill is a registered dietician / nutritionist with over twenty-five years of experience working with babies, toddlers, children, and teens, in a variety of settings from private practice and consulting to author and writer. Her specialty is taking the current research in pediatric nutrition and shaping it into practical, sane advice for parents and healthcare providers. Jill writes the blog, “Just the Right Bite” and hosts a childhood nutrition podcast called The Nourished Child.

In today’s conversation, Jill shares her insights about what we know about the relationship between ADHD and nutrition, the impact of nutritional deficiencies in kids, and how to not get overwhelmed at the thought of making changes in your family and, more specifically, your child’s diet. She also shares some great tips for how to get started in making small changes that can have a big impact. Jill truly is an expert in her field, and I learned a lot in this conversation. I hope you enjoy it!

Jill Castle is a registered dietitian/nutritionist and a childhood nutrition expert. With over 25 years of experience with babies, toddlers, children and teens, in a variety of settings from private practice and consulting to author and writer, and as a mother of 4, Jill is sought after as one of America’s leading experts in the field of childhood nutrition.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

What the current research says about ADHD and nutrition
The common types of nutritional challenges and deficiencies faced by kids with ADHD
How to address nutritional concerns with your child without getting overwhelmed
Thoughts on dealing with shame or guilt surrounding a child’s nutritional habits
Whether or not good nutrition can be a substitute for medication when it comes to treating a child with ADHD
Tips for making small, positive nutritional changes in your home and with your ADHD child
How we can get our kids invested in their own nutritional well-being

Resources mentioned for ADHD and Nutrition in Kids

Jill Castle’s website
Jill’s podcast: The Nourished Child
Jill’s books
Jill’s Blog Post: A Healthy ADHD Diet for Kids

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

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TPP 310: A Conversation with Dr. Norrine Russell About Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) & ADHD

8 november 2022 | 43 min

I’m really excited to bring you this conversation with Dr. Norinne Russell on a new topic we haven’t covered before on this show and one that only came into my radar last year, and that is rejection sensitive dysphoria or RSD, a dysphoria commonly experienced by people with ADHD. We talked about what rejection sensitive dysphoria is and how it’s different from mood disorders or emotional dysregulation, what the early signs are and examples of triggers from Norrine’s own experience with her son, and how to support children with RSD. I’m sure this conversation will resonate with many of you and hope you find this new topic interesting and valuable to your family.

About Dr. Norrine Russell

Dr. Norrine Russell is the founder of Russell Coaching for Students, which uses an innovative method of coaching for complex students, including those who are 2E; have ADHD, Autism, or Anxiety; and those with learning differences. This innovative method, Connected Coaching, has proven successful for hundreds of students since 2009. She is the author of the recently published guide for parents, “Asking the Right Questions Before, During, and After Your Child’s ADHD Diagnosis.”

With twenty years of experience creating positive youth development and parenting education programs, Dr. Russell has extensive knowledge of child development, learning styles, special needs, and positive parenting philosophies. She blends this knowledge to provide students and parents with comprehensive support and the tools they need to grow and thrive.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What rejection sensitive dysphoria or RSD is and how it presents
What the early signs of rejection-sensitive dysphoria are and examples of triggers for children and adolescents
The difference between RSD, mood disorders, and “typical” emotional dysregulation that neurodivergent children might experience
How to support children with RSD

Resources mentioned for Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) & ADHD

Dr. Norrine Russell’s website
Dr. Norrine Russell via telephone: +12127161161
Kids in the Syndrome Mix of ADHD, LD, Autism Spectrum, Tourette's, Anxiety, and More!: The One Stop Guide for Parents, Teachers, and Other Professionals by Dr. Martin Kutscher
New Insights Into Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (Additude Magazine article)
How ADHD Ignites Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (Additude article)
Free Resource: Understanding Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (Additude article)

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TPP 140a: AuthorJulie Lythcott-Haims on How Parents Can Help Their Kids Successfully Launch

4 november 2022 | 47 min

My guest for this episode is the brilliant Julie Lythcott-Haims., the author of the New York Times’ bestselling, and in my opinion, majorly game-changing-in-the-parenting-space book, How to Raise an Adult. She wrote it after noticing that prospective college students at Stanford University, where she was dean of admissions, were being over-parented and as a result, were lacking the resources to develop the resilience, resourcefulness, and inner determination necessary for success.

In this episode, Julie and I talk about what it takes for a child to be successful—looking at how we define success along the way—and explore what we as parents can do to help our child develop the agency they need to become self-actualized adults. I loved having this conversation with Julie and am still noodling on the many takeaways and aha moments I experienced. I hope you get a lot out of it.

Julie Lythcott-Haims' How to Raise an Adult has been published in over two dozen countries and gave rise to a TED talk that became one of the top TED Talks of 2016 with over 3.5 million views and counting, as well as a forthcoming sequel on how to be an adult, for young adults. Two years later Julie published Real American: A Memoir, a critically-acclaimed and award-winning memoir which examines racism through her experience as a Black and biracial person.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

What is at the root of fear-based parenting
Why Julie says most parents are raising kids from a place of love, ego, and fear
Challenges and hardships every child should face in order to be ready to be an adult
How we do our children a disservice when we “become” their default executive functioning
How we can (and need to) redefine what success looks like
The connection between successful adults and a child doing chores (and how to get started if you’re not doing it now)
Why happiness in our kids stems from love
The benefits of hands-on work for kids developing a sense of agency
How to help our kids bolster their self-advocacy skills

Resources mentioned for helping differently wired teens launch

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TPP 309: Anya Kamenetz on Her Book The Stolen Year and the Impact of COVID on Children

1 november 2022 | 38 min

Author and reporter, Anya Kamenetz is back on the podcast to talk about her new book The Stolen Year: How Covid Changed Children’s Lives, And Where We Go Now. The Stolen Year is a powerful look at how the pandemic disrupted children’s lives — their learning, mental health, and overall well-being. The Stolen Year isn’t written specifically for parents of differently wired children, but I thought it was important to really explore what the research and data shows the cost of the past two years has been for our most valuable resource – our children, as well as consider the question – where do we go from here?

During our conversation we talked about the trends on decreasing graduation rates, the impact of food scarcity on children and adolescents, and caregiver depression. We also talked about the kinds of resources families need to recover from the pandemic, especially within marginalized communities and more severely impacted populations, and much more.

Anya Kamenetz has covered education for many years, including for NPR, where she also co-created the podcast Life Kit:Parenting in partnership with Sesame Workshop.

Kamenetz is the author of several acclaimed nonfiction books: Generation Debt ; DIY U ; The Test: Why Our Schools Are Obsessed With Standardized Testing, But You Don’t Have To Be, and The Art of Screen Time: How Your Family Can Balance Digital Media and Real Life.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What the long-lasting effects of COVID in children’s lives are according to Anya’s research
Where we should be focusing our energy — our kids’ learning loss or their mental health and wellbeing
The trends on decreasing graduation rates and how that might play out in the next few years for young people
Whether experts consider the pandemic to be an ACE (adverse childhood experience)
The impact of food scarcity on children during COVID
What resources families need to recover from the pandemic, especially for marginalized communities

Resources mentioned for the impact of COVID on children

Support the show

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Visit Tilt Parenting
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TPP 073a: Non-Violent Communication, Whole-Person Learning, and Neurodiverse Students

28 oktober 2022 | 49 min

This week I’m talking with Zach Morris, the executive director and development of curriculum and instruction at LEARN Inc. LEARN Inc. is an non-for-profit school in Missoula, Montana in the United States which is approaching education in a thoughtful and alternative way, and with powerful results, especially for their neurodivergent students, which make up to 75% of the student body. Their mission is to facilitate individualized learning opportunities that honor neurodivergence, encourage social collaboration, and foster whole-person growth. And as a result, the kids at LEARN are getting the opportunity to develop with confidence and feeling seen for who they are.

I know that this education piece—figuring out how to help our child develop a love of learning and reach their full potential—is one of the most challenging pieces of raising differently wired kids, and I just have to say that talking with Zach left me feeling inspired, hopeful, and motivated. Zach believes there is a different way, and he’s doing his part to push the needle forward. Together we talk about the the philosophy of nonviolent communication, what can happen for our kids when we practice compassion with them, and how parents like us can bring some of Zach’s philosophy into our lives to support our kids. This was one of those mind = blown conversations for me. I hope you like it.

Zach Morris M.Ed is a leader in education. He holds a Montana State educators license, he is HANDLE level 1&2 certified, and he is an active pursuant of Non-Violent Communication practices. His current research targets neurodiversity and learning.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

What it looks like when education is grounded in compassion and the principles of nonviolent communication, ecological literacy, and whole person learning (social, emotional, physiological, and academic)
Why Zach believes the key to education is individualization and diversity within the system
How a child can be shifted from feeling they do everything wrong to feeling like they can are heard and can contribute
How Zach helps a child with PTSD from their previous educational experiences recover
How parents can incorporate Zach’s philosophy into their daily lives
Why Zach believes that we have choice in everything

Resources mentioned for whole-person learning

Support the show

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TPP 308: Joyfully Parenting & Experiencing Gifted and 2e Children, with Marc Smolowitz

25 oktober 2022 | 41 min

For today’s episode, I’m bringing multi-award-winning director, producer and executive film producer, Marc Smolowitz, back on the podcast. It was four years ago that Marc first came on the show to talk about a movie he was working on called The G Word, a feature-length documentary about giftedness that asks the urgent equity question – In the 21st century, who gets to be Gifted in America and Why? Marc is currently working on the post-production of the movie so I wanted to invite him back to talk about what the last 4 years have been like in the giftedness community. What has changed? What are the things we need to be looking out for and what initiatives have been created?

AND, I also wanted this show to be a part of celebrating the 2nd annual Gifted / Talented / Neurodiversity Awareness Week, a week-long celebration created by Marc and which is happening this very week. The theme for this year’s awareness week is Gifted JOY, and I really love the idea of connecting the concept of joy and empowerment to the conversation surrounding giftedness.

Marc Smolowitz is a multi-award-winning director, producer, and executive producer who has been significantly involved in 50+ independent films. His films have been screened at the world’s top-tier festivals such as Sundance, Berlin, Venice, Tribeca, Locarno, Chicago, Palm Springs, SF FILM, AFI Docs, IDFA, and DOC NYC, among others. In 2009, Marc founded 13th Gen, a San Francisco-based company that works with a dynamic range of independent film partners globally to oversee the financing, production, post-production, marketing, sales, and distribution efforts of a vibrant portfolio of films and filmmakers.

In 2022, Marc is currently in post-production on THE G WORD – a feature-length documentary about giftedness that asks the urgent equity question – In the 21st century, who gets to be Gifted in America and Why?

Things you’ll learn from this episode

How the conversation surrounding giftedness and neurodivergence have changed in recent years and how those have impacted the direction fo The G Word
Why it’s so important to include the concept of neurodivergence in the broader conversation about gifted and talented populations
How we can intentionally use joy to explore and ease pain/trauma narratives, especially for gifted and neurodiverse populations
How parents can lean into the joy of raising their gifted children and get involved in celebrating GTN Awareness Week

Resources mentioned:

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TPP 049a: Simone Davies on Setting Up Your Home to Support Your Child's Growth

21 oktober 2022 | 42 min

In this episode of Tilt Parenting, I bring back to the show Simone Davies, a Montessori teacher and parent educator who runs a Montessori playgroup in Amsterdam for babies, toddlers, and preschoolers up to four years old. Through her online business, The Montessori Notebook, Simone focuses on helping parents learn how to bring Montessori into their home.

Today Simone and I are talking about the “spaces” in our home—specifically how we can best design and set them up to support our differently-wired kids. I’ve watched as Simone developed her virtual e-course, Setting Up Your Home Montessori Style, and I was struck by how the approach she talks about in her course directly relates to the things we as parents can do to support our kids in developing those crucial executive functioning skills, like task initiation, time management, planning, and organizing, as well as fostering independence. In this episode, we’ll talk about how we can set up our homes—our kitchen, bedroom, shoes and coat area, homework space—to support our children in fostering these skills.

Simone Davies is also the author of The Montessori Toddler, a comprehensive guide to raising your toddler in a Montessori way. It includes Montessori activities, how to set up your home, and how to encourage cooperation from your children, and The Montessori Baby.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

How to set up the shoes and coat area to help kids “get out the door” with success and independence
How making checklists for our kids can instill in them a sense of responsibility while also easing transitions
What parents who aren’t naturally organized can support themselves
The gifts of decluttering and clearing our space
The importance of making a homework space inviting and distraction-free
Tips for setting up spaces to foster more independence in children
Why making things attractive, cozy, and comfortable benefits our kids

Resources mentioned for supporting children’s growth at home

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TPP 307: Eliza Fricker Talks Parenting a Child with PDA

18 oktober 2022 | 38 min

On today’s episode I’m talking to Eliza Fricker about PDA or pathological demand avoidance – and in fact I know many people interpret PDA as persistent desire for autonomy. I’ve done a few episodes on PDA before but never from a parent’s perspective so after reading Eliza’s book, The Family Experience of PDA, I knew I wanted to share her perspective with the Tilt community. During this episode, we talked about how demand avoidance is more extreme in a child with a PDA profile vs. the inflexibility and rigidity we might see in other neurodivergent kids, what Eliza has learned about herself parenting a child with PDA, and what her resistance was to the changes needed to her parenting style. Eliza also gave out some great tips for teachers who have a PDA student in their classroom and for parents who are struggling with family, friends, or people close to them who aren’t willing to understand what PDA is and what that means for their family.

Eliza Fricker is the illustrator behind “Missing the Mark” a deeply personal and all too human exploration of a mother’s journey navigating the education system and everyday life with a child who can’t go to school. Eliza’s latest book, Can’t Not Won’t will be published by Jessica Kingsley Publishers in December 2022.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What makes demand avoidance more extreme in children with PDA
Eliza’s experience in changing her parenting ways to become more flexible
Tweaks teachers can use to work with children who have PDA in a classroom setting
How PDA may look different than “typical demand avoidance” that we might see in some neurodivergent children
What Eliza has learned about herself from parenting a child with PDA
Advice for parents who are raising a child with PDA

Resources mentioned for PDA

Support the show

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TPP 051a: Asher and Debbie Talk About Handling Parent-Child Conflict

14 oktober 2022 | 29 min

Today’s episode is a Kid’s POV Special episode featuring another conversation with 12-year-old Asher. Our topic? Conflict. More specifically, handling parent-child conflict between the two of us. We’re tackling this topic because I’ve been getting questions from listeners who want to know a) if we even have conflicts at all and b) if so, how we handle them.

The easy answer to the first part of that question is DEFINITELY. We DEFINITELY have conflict. I’m very human in that way, as is Asher. Today, we’ll spend the episode answering the second part of that question. We’ll talk about the kinds of things that crop up and cause conflict between us, and then we’ll share with you what that actually looks like in our world—what I do, what Ash does, and most importantly, how we move through and past it.

Pro tip: This is a good episode for co-listening! When Asher and I listen to podcasts, we dump a puzzle out on the dining room table and listen while building the puzzle. It makes for a nice combination!

Debbie Reber is the founder and CEO of Tilt Parenting and the host of the TiLT Parenting Podcast. 12-year-old Asher is Debbie’s child and is regularly featured on the podcast. Find out more by visiting the About Page.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

The benefits of talking through and getting clear on expectations (for all members of the family) prior to leaving for a vacation
A strategy for using the collaborative problem solving approach to identify, address, and pre-solve concerns ahead of time
How to make departure day go more smoothly
The benefits of exploring and researching aspects of a vacation time well in advance of the trip (including accommodations, activities, etc.)
A strategy for using written schedules coupled with frequent reviews during a vacation keeps everyone’s expectations in check
The benefits of bringing a child into the planning process (and letting them determine some of what will happen on vacation)
Why it’s useful to work with your child to discover what they need most on vacation and then incorporating it into your daily plan (ie: rest, chill time, etc.)

Resources mentioned for handling parent-child conflict

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TPP 306: Laura Vanderkam Shares How We Can Find Tranquility by Tuesday

11 oktober 2022 | 43 min

My guest today is author, productivity guru, and mom of 5, Laura Vanderkam. Laura is the author of several time management and productivity books, including the one we are discussing today, Tranquility by Tuesday: 9 Ways to Calm the Chaos and Make Time for What Matters. She is also the host of the Before Breakfast podcast and the co-host, with Sarah Hart-Unger, of the Best of Both Worlds podcast.

I’ve long been a fan of Laura’s books, and so I was excited to talk with her about Tranquility By Tuesday, and honestly, since reading it, I’ve started incorporating a few of her strategies into my world as I try to be more mindful and aware of how I spend my time. The results have been pretty great. That’s why I wanted to share Laura’s work with my community because I know so many of you are dealing with overwhelm and burnout. And my hope is that you’ll take away one or two nuggets that you can play with in your daily life to move the needle closer to tranquility.

During our conversation, Laura shared her definition of tranquility, the common myths that get in the way of building more peace in our lives, and why it’s so important for families to have adventures together. She also shared multiple strategies that I promise are easy enough to implement. And again, even though they might seem like small shifts, they can have a big impact in your world.

Laura is the author of several time management and productivity books, including the forthcoming Tranquility by Tuesday: 9 Ways to Calm the Chaos and Make Time for What Matters. She is the host of the Before Breakfast podcast and the co-host, with Sarah Hart-Unger, of the Best of Both Worlds podcast. She lives outside Philadelphia with her husband and five children.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Laura’s definition of tranquility and pushing back against the perception of not having enough time
Advice for parents who want to better manage their energy
The barriers and myths that get in the way of building peace and tranquility
Strategies to poke holes and reframe the stories that we tell ourselves
Why it’s so important for families to have adventures together
Simple “rules” or guidelines that can be gamechangers in your daily life

Resources mentioned for How We Can Find Tranquility by Tuesday

Laura Vanderkam’s website
Tranquility by Tuesday: 9 Ways to Calm the Chaos and Make Time for What Matters by Laura Vanderkam
168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think by Laura Vanderkam
The New Corner Office: How the Most Successful People Work from Home by Laura Vanderkam
I Know How She Does It: How the Most Successful Women Make the Most of Their Time by Laura Vanderkam
Off the Clock: Feel Less Busy While Getting Stuff Done by Laura Vanderkam

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TPP 117a: Angela Pruess on Supporting Children's Fledgling Self-Regulation

7 oktober 2022 | 44 min

TPP 305: Stuart Shanker on What Self-Regulation Is, Why It Matters, and How to Help Our Children (and Ourselves) Do It Better

4 oktober 2022 | 47 min

We are kicking off this season with a conversation with Dr. Stuart Shanker, who I first learned about through my friend Seth Perler as he’s been part of the TEFOS Summit. I love Stuart's message and recently devoured his book Self-Reg: How to Help Your Child (and You) Break the Stress Cycle and Successfully Engage With Life, and wanted to dive deeper with Stuart about it. In this episode, we get into the ways in which the brain controls the levels of stress, the difference between self-regulation and self-control, and the difference between stress behavior and misbehaving. Stuart also walks us through his 5 steps to Self-Reg, and talks about the power of us as parents and caregivers and educators doing our own self-reg work so we can support the kids around us.

Dr. Stuart Shanker (D.Phil) is a Distinguished Research Professor Emeritus of Philosophy and Psychology, the Founder & Visionary of The MEHRIT Centre, Ltd., and Self-Reg Global Inc. One of his many books, Calm, Alert and Learning: Classroom Strategies for Self-Regulation (2012), is a top-selling educational publication in Canada. Self-Reg: How to Help Your Child (and You) Break the Stress Cycle and Successfully Engage With Life (2016), has garnered enthusiastic reviews and media attention throughout North America and has also been published in the United Kingdom, the United States, Poland, Germany, China, South Korea, Japan, the Netherlands, Georgia and the Czech Republic. His latest books are Self-Reg Schools: A Handbook for Educators (2019) and Reframed: Self-Reg for a Just Society (2020)

Things you'll learn from this episode

How the explosion of stress-related problems in recent years among children has augmented the need for additional self-reg resources for parents and educators
How the brain controls the levels of stress and simple strategies that can be used to calm the nervous system response
Why self-reg practices for parents and teachers other adults begin with learning how to regulate ourselves
The difference between misbehavior and stress behavior
How self-regulation mechanisms evolve as we get older
The distinction between self-control and self-regulation and the five steps to self-regulation

Resources mentioned:

The Mehrit Center / Dr. Stuart Shanker’s website
Resource Library on Stuart’s website
Self-Reg Online Learning & Certificate Programs
Self-Reg: How to Help Your Child (and You) Break the Stress Cycle and Successfully Engage with Life by Dr. Stuart Shanker
Reframed: Self-Reg for a Just Society by Dr. Stuart Shanker
Self-Reg Schools: A Handbook for Educators by Dr. Stuart Shanker and Dr. Susan Hopkins
The Functional Neuroanatomy of Pleasure and Happiness (Overview of Olds and Milner study)
Seth Perler’s website
A “Masterclass” in Executive Functioning with Seth Perler, P

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TPP 072a: A Conversation with Debbie About About Her Homeschooling Curriculum and Schedule

2 september 2022 | 46 min

This is the third installment in a series of solocasts specifically about homeschooling 2e children. I know many families of 2e and differently wired kids end up going down the homeschooling road, whether they’re reluctant homeschoolers and they felt “forced” into the decision because they ran out of other options or whether they knew they would homeschool from the moment their child was born. Whatever the case, this episode is for you.

In this episode, I share how Asher and I structure our school, what kind of classes he takes, how I figure out what he’s going to focus on, and what a typical school day looks like for us. I wanted to talk about these things because I know that designing a curriculum can be one of the most overwhelming pieces of this puzzle.

A quick note: If you haven’t already done so, I encourage you to listen to the two other solocast episodes I’ve done on homeschooling 2e children. In Episode 42 I talk about how I made the decision to homeschool even though I had a LOT of resistance to the idea, and in Episode 48, I talk about the actual transition to homeschooling … basically how we survived that first rocky year.

Debbie Reber, MA, is a parenting activist, bestselling author, podcast host, and speaker who moved her career in a more personal direction in 2016 when she founded Tilt Parenting, a top resource for parents like her who are raising differently wired children. The TiLT Parenting Podcast has grown to be a top podcast in Kids & Family, with more than 4 million downloads and a slate of guests that includes high-profile thought leaders across the parenting and education space. A certified Positive Discipline trainer and a regular contributor to Psychology Today and ADDitude Magazine, Debbie’s newest book is Differently Wired: Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World. In November 2018, she spoke at TEDxAmsterdam, delivering a talk entitled Why the Future Will Be Differently Wired. In the summer of 2020, she co-created the Parenting in Place Masterclass series.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

How Debbie has worked with curriculum advisors in designing the game plan for Asher’s classes
The big role developing executive functioning skills plays in Asher’s curriculum
Why Debbie believes freedom and flexibility is one of the biggest benefits of homeschooling
How Debbie has incorporated outside curriculums into her school approach
How Debbie supplements formal curriculum with videos, books, and experiential learning
Debbie’s favorite resources for teaching, subject by subject
What a typical school day looks like for Debbie and Asher
Why Debbie believes it’s critical that Asher participate in the actual design of their schedule and curriculum

Resources mentioned for homeschooling 2e children

Kathi Kearney (curriculum advisor classes)
Kristi Helgeson (curriculum advisor)
Gifted Homeschooler’s Forum
Athena’s Advanced Academy
Yoga with Adrienne (YouTube channel)
Life of Fred

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TPP 304: Special Episode on Updated College Vetting & Admissions Process for Differently Wired Students

30 augusti 2022 | 82 min

To close out this Summer season I’m bringing you a special double episode all about college, specifically, how families can navigate the application process and what’s changed since Covid, as well as understanding the ways in which colleges may, or may not, support their neurodivergent students and what families should be looking for when exploring potential schools.

In the first half of this episode, you’ll hear me talking with Eric Karlan, the co-founder of Ivy Experience, a company providing academic tutoring, standardized test preparation, and essay consulting services. Since 2010, Eric has consulted thousands of high school and graduate school students on their college and graduate school application essays and resumes across the country and around the world. He gave a TEDx Talk in 2018 called “What do I need to know about you?” inspired by his work brainstorming with students on their college application essays.

Eric and I talked about what’s different in the college admissions process today as a result of the Covid pandemic, and whether or not those changes are here to stay. Eric explains what “test-optional” and “test-blind” policies are and how they affect some students more than others, what schools are doing to bring in more diversity to their student body, and how students might choose to disclose their neurodivergence, disability, or other parts of their identities in their college application.

Then in the second half of the episode, I’m joined by Elizabeth Hamblet, an expert in college disability services and helping neurodivergent high school students successfully transition to college. Elizabeth began her career as a high school special education teacher and then began working at the college level in the late 1990s. She is now at her third university, where she helps students with time management, organization, reading, and study skills. She offers programs on preparing students for successful college transition. Elizabeth’s newest book, Seven Steps to College Success: A Pathway for Students with Disabilities, will be out in early 2023.

In our conversation, Elizabeth and I talk about what kinds of services colleges may offer students, how to vett schools to find out what kinds of supports and accommodations may be available and how to access them, and what parents should consider when helping their differently wired young adult explore potential colleges.

Things you'll learn from this episode

How the college admission process has changed as a result of the COVID pandemic
What it actually means when colleges declare they are “test-optional” or “test blind,” and how applicants should navigate decisions around submitting tests
How the young adult mental health is impacting students’ performance in high school, and how prospective colleges are considering those dips
What schools are doing to foster more diversity within their student body (race, gender, neurodiversity, etc.)
Considerations surrounding whether or not a student should disclose their neurodivergence, disability, or other parts of their identities in their college application
How some universities have added expanded their disability and mental health services on campus in response to student’s needs since the pandemic
What fee-base

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TPP 039a: A Conversation with 12-year-old Asher About Goal Setting

26 augusti 2022 | 31 min

In this special kid’s POV edition, Asher and I talk about having ADHD and goal setting, a topic near and dear to my heart, but also an issue we hear from parents about a lot. Asher is someone who always seems to have a lot of projects he’s working on and he sets often ambitious goals centered around those projects. Yet because of the way Ash is wired, he can often get distracted or derailed, which results in him being frustrated with himself.

I know a thing or two about goal setting — it’s actually the topic of a book I wrote for teen girls in 2015 called Doable, and so I am committed to using what I know about goals to help Asher learn how to successfully set and reach his own goals while also developing his planning, organizational, and time management skills. If you have kids with lots of ideas for things they’d like to do but seem to get stuck before they finish, or maybe even struggle to begin in the first place, this would be a good episode to listen to with them.

Debbie Reber is the founder and CEO of Tilt Parenting and the host of the TiLT Parenting Podcast. 11-year-old Asher is Debbie’s child and is regularly featured on the podcast.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

The connection between ADHD, executive functioning challenges, and goal planning
Asher’s strategy for setting, measuring, and reaching goals
How Asher uses both daily and weekly goal planning to keep him on track
What typically derails Asher when he’s pursuing a goal
The power of the daily check-in
Asher’s tips for other kids looking to set and reach their personal goals

Resources mentioned for ADHD & goal setting

Debbie’s book Doable: The Girls’ Guide to Accomplishing Just About Anything by Debbie Reber
A Conversation with 11-year-old Asher About His Game-Changing Morning Routine (podcast)
Understood.org
Productivity Planner from Intelligent Change
Download a copy of Asher’s Goal Planning Worksheet
The Color Run (series of 5k races)

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TPP 303: Dr. Joseph Lee Talks About the Importance of SEL / Social and Emotional Learning

23 augusti 2022 | 46 min

Have you ever wondered if SEL (social and emotional learning) in school and classrooms really matters? I’ve been exploring this question a lot about over the past year, as well trying to understand the recent increase in parental and political pushback in the US specifically that is putting the future of SEL in schools at risk.

I wanted to get into a deep conversation about SEL for the show, and so I reached out Dr. Joseph Lee, a psychiatrist with a special interest in social and emotional learning and helping people achieve what he calls optimal mental healthiness.

We had exactly the conversation I was hoping we would, as we got into so many important topics, including the state of children and young adult’s mental health today, demystifying what SEL or social emotional learning actually is, why SEL matters, how it’s best introduced in schools, the limitations in the current educational model for social emotional learning curriculums, what the pushback against SEL is really about, and what it’s at stake if our children aren’t provided with social and emotional learning opportunities. I think this is such an important and timely conversation – I hope that you enjoy it and that you help me amplify this episode by sharing it in your communities.

Dr. Joseph Lee, MD., is a Psychiatrist in private practice in Redondo Beach, California. He is also an educator in social and emotional learning (SEL) and provides individual and group supervision to licensed therapists looking to add mental healthiness and SEL principles to their own practices. Dr. Lee has a medical doctorate from University Of California, Los Angeles, School Of Medicine.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What Joseph Lee is seeing in his practice regarding and his thoughts on the state of children and young adult’s mental health today
What SEL or social emotional learning actually is
Ways that SEL can be weaved into traditional educational curriculum as well as the use of specific SEL curriculum
What social and emotional learning inside schools looks like in practice
The “why” behind the pushback against SEL in the recent years and what’s it’s at stake if we lose the ability to teach SEL in classrooms

Resources mentioned for SEL or Social and Emotional Learning

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
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TPP 038a: Dr. Jenna Flowers on How to Practice Conscious Coparenting

19 augusti 2022 | 40 min

In this episode of the Tilt Parenting Podcast, I sit down with Dr. Jenna Flowers, a licensed marriage and family therapist, author, and speaker, and the woman behind the fantastic new book, The Conscious Parent’s Guide to Coparenting: A Mindful Approach to Creating a Collaborative, Positive Parenting Plan.

Dr. Jenna’s book is aimed at helping parents who are no longer together design a healthy alliance and share their parenting responsibilities in a way that best supports their children. In our conversation, we talk about the extra considerations for those parenting differently-wired kids, kids for whom consistency and support is critical to their healthy emotional development. Dr. Jenna also explains how parents of atypical kids can foster a structured, supportive environment in both homes, as well as shares her advice for things parents can do right now to strengthen their relationship with their co-parent, whether together or apart.

Dr. Jenna Flowers is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Author, and Speaker. She completed her undergraduate studies at the University of Michigan. She then graduated with her MA in Spiritual Psychology from the prestigious University of Santa Monica, and Doctoral Degree in Psychology from the professional psychology school American Behavioral Studies Institute. Upon completing her Marriage and Family Therapy licensing board examinations in 2006, she has been in private practice in Newport Beach, California.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

What exactly conscious coparenting is
The importance of repairing hurts from our childhood in order to become more present with our own children
How to help a child not take on responsibility or blame for their parents’ breakup
What to do when both parents aren’t on the same page
What a designed alliance with a coparent actually looks like

Resources mentioned for conscious coparenting

Dr. Jenna Flowers’ personal website
The Conscious Parent’s Guide to Coparenting by Dr. Jenna Flowers
Brene Brown
Samantha Ettus
Parenting from the Inside Out: How a Deeper Self-Understanding Can Help You Raise Children Who Thrive by Dr. Dan Siegel
Conscious Mothering Curriculum
How Positive Discipline Can Help Children Thrive, with Casey O’Roarty of Joyful Courage (Tilt Parenting Podcast)
What it Takes to Live a Hea

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TPP 302: Online Learning & the Future of Education with Outschool Founder Amir Nathoo

16 augusti 2022 | 35 min

In this conversation with Outschool co-founder and CEO Amir Nathoo, we discuss alternative education models and why they’re so critical in preparing all kids for the future, as well as get an inside look into the mission and vision for Outschool, learn more about they successfully create community through virtual classes, ways in which classes are designed to support students with different learning styles and much more.

If this conversation sparks you to explore and enroll in classs at Outschool classes, be sure to use the code TILT to get a $20 credit towards your first class.

Amir Nathoo is CEO of Outschool, a marketplace for live online classes for K-12 learners. Amir worked at Square, leading the development of Square Payroll. Previously, he served as CEO and co-founder of Trigger.io, a development platform for creating native mobile apps. He holds an MEng in Electrical and Information Sciences from The University of Cambridge. Amir lives in San Francisco with his wife Kirsty and their two children.

Things you'll learn from this episode

How Outschool grew through COVID and how online learning has changed in the past 2 years
How alternative ways of learning are helping prepare our kids for the future
The crucial part that community plays into Outschool’s platform and what they offer to families
How Outschool supports different types of learners and why it has attracted neurodivergent learners from the start
How Outschool finds and onboards teachers and how they develop their classes
Amir’s tips for parents on vetting online learning programs to determine if they are right for your child/ren

Resources mentioned for Outschool and Online Learning

For more info, visit: https://www.tiltparenting.com/session302

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TPP 088a: Jessica Lahey Talks About the Gifts of Failure for Our Kids

12 augusti 2022 | 47 min

My guest is Jessica Lahey, an educator, writer, and speaker, and the author of one of my favorite parenting books, The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed. Jess shares her insights about how we can best prepare our kids for an independent, successful adulthood in the way we practice autonomy supportive parenting versus overparenting, what it means to let our kids “fail” to help them thrive, how we can help our kids learn how to “sit with frustration,” and much more.

Jessica Lahey is an educator, writer, and speaker. She is an English and writing teacher, correspondent for the Atlantic, commentator for Vermont Public Radio, and writes the “Parent-Teacher Conference” column for the New York Times. Jessica earned a B.A. in Comparative Literature from the University of Massachusetts and a J.D. with a concentration in juvenile and education law from the University of North Carolina School of Law. She lives in New Hampshire with her husband and two sons.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

The difference between overparenting and “autonomy supportive parenting"
How many parents underestimate their kids and might be unknowingly fostering learned helplessness in them
How we can build scaffolding for our kids
What Jessica wishes parents of atypical kids knew about teachers
Jessica’s advice for how we can best advocate for our kids in school
How we can foster more of a growth mindset in our children, especially those who are perfectionist, as well as how to NOT foster “learned helplessness”

Resources mentioned about the gift of failure

Jessica Lahey’s website
The Gift of Failure: How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed by Jessica Lahey
Why Parents Need To Let Their Kids Fail (The Atlantic article)
Dr. Ross Greene Talks About Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (podcast episode)
The Opposite of Spoiled: Raising Kids Who Are Grounded, Generous and Smart About Money by Ron Lieber
Am Writing (Jessica’s podcast)
The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children by

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TPP 301: Navigating Big Life Transitions with Differently Wired Children (a Solocast)

9 augusti 2022 | 36 min

I haven’t done a solocast in a while, but when you talk, I listen, and this topic has been requested by many of you, so I decided to dedicate this episode to talk about navigating big life transitions with differently wired kids. Our family has gone through our fair share of big changes, which you’ll hear all about in this episode, so this is something that I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about. Especially as a parent of a differently wired kid, I know that there are some extra challenges that might come up when their routines, environment, life circumstances, or supports change, and our kids are also more likely to be resistant to changes (even if they are beneficial). So today I’ll be sharing the strategies I’ve personally found helpful while going through big transitions with Asher.

In this episode, I talk about key things such as why being honest when communicating with your kid is so important to help them understand and process change, how being vulnerable can be a way to show support, how to validate our kids’ feelings about the changes or transitions, and how to identify their concerns so you can make plans to address them in advance. I also share about what adjustment disorder is and the kind of extra support you might need during transitions.

Tilt Parenting Founder & CEO Debbie Reber (MA) is a parenting activist, bestselling author, podcast host, and speaker. A certified Positive Discipline trainer and a regular contributor to Psychology Today and ADDitude Magazine, Debbie’s most recent book is Differently Wired: Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World. Debbie’s Tilt Parenting Podcast is the top performing podcast for parents, caregivers, educators, and professionals raising and supporting neurodivergent children, and has more than 4 million downloads. In November 2018, she spoke at TEDxAmsterdam, delivering a talk entitled Why the Future Will Be Differently Wired. In the summer of 2020, she co-created the Parenting in Place Masterclass series.

Things you'll learn from this episode

The benefits and growth that can come from navigating big changes as a family
Why honesty is so important when communicating with your child about big changes
What to share versus what not to share with your child about the transitions you go through
How to validate the big emotions and thoughts that big transitions can bring up in your child
The importance of doing your own work as a parent to be able to support our kids during transitions
What adjustment disorder is and the extra support you might need to help your child through one
How being vulnerable with your kids can be really supportive for them
Identifying the concerns that our kids have and coming up with plans to address them in advance
Creating new routines to create security for our kids during big transitions

For more info, visit: https://www.tiltparenting.com/session301

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TPP 029a: How to Live a Satisfying Life While Raising a Differently-Wired Kid, with Samantha Ettus

5 augusti 2022 | 32 min

In this episode of the TiLT Parenting Podcast, I talk with Samantha Ettus, a renowned work-life balance expert, author, radio show host, and media personality. Sam is passionate about helping people, and especially moms, find create a more fulfilled, healthier, and more satisfying life. She writes about her ideas in her new book The Pie Life: A Guilt Free Recipe for Success and Satisfaction.

I was excited to talk with Sam about her new book and ideas behind what she refers to as “embracing the mess and bumps” that come hand-in-hand with living a truly fulfilled life, since messiness and bumps seem to a part of any parent raising a differently-wired kid’s experience. In our conversation, we talk about everything from self-care and intentional parenting to getting our partners up to speed since often moms seem to be the ones holding onto a lot of the information relevant to our kids’ day-to-day life.

Samantha Ettus is a work-life expert whose goal is to find the spark within each one of us and turn it into a fire. She is a best-selling author, a writer for Forbes, a sought after speaker, a Harvard MBA, and host of a nationally syndicated call-in radio show. Sam has shared her advice on hundreds of television shows and media outlets including The TODAY Show, Access Hollywood, NBC Nightly News, CNN, The Doctors, and Fox and Friends, and in The Wall Street Journal, The New York Times and USA Today.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

Why working moms are, in many ways, set up to fail
Thoughts on being a more intentional parent, embracing empathy, and seeing our kids for who they are
What’s reasonable to expect when designing a healthy, fulfilled life, and how to find work-life balance
How to get your parenting partner on-board / up-to-speed on important matters related to our children
Why self-care is so critical for mothers and how to build self-care practices into daily life
Sam’s thoughts on juggling work and the unpredictable nature of raising a differently-wired kid

Resources mentioned for work-life balance + parenting

Samantha Ettus’ website
The Pie Life: A Guilt-Free Recipe for Success and Satisfaction by Samantha Ettus
Sam’s Tedx Talk: The Secret to Unlocking a Child’s Potential
Working Mom’s Lifestyle Radio Show

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TPP 300: Executive Function Coach Seth Perler on What Is / Isn't Working in School

2 augusti 2022 | 51 min

I wanted to have a frank and honest conversation with my friend, executive function coach, and frequent guest of the pod, Seth Perler, about what is and is not working in schools right now, especially as we are once again in that back-to-school season. Of course there have been many changes in education since the start of COVID, including the inclusion of technology in almost every aspect of learning and the increased testing that students are being subjected to since returning to campus. And we know that neurodivergent kids tend to be impacted by these changes more than other students. So what can we do as parents? Where should we be putting our energies? That’s what Seth and I get into in this episode.

Seth Perler is an Executive Function Coach and Consultant with extensive experience addressing extraordinarily diverse learning needs. Seth was a teacher for 12 years, working with a diverse range of Gifted and Twice Exceptional (2E) students in charter schools for 8 years, and teaching students with ADD, ADHD, Dyslexia and other executive function challenges, as well as students with developmental disabilities. He’s been an Executive Function coach for middle, high school and college students since 2010.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Seth’s opinion on what is working and what is not working in schools right now
Advice on how to push back on the increase in testing that has started since students returned to in-person lessons
What Seth would say to parents who have kids with ADHD who are checked out of their school day
Ideas for getting educators on board in shifting the paradigm
How to collaborate with a student who insists executive functioning strategies don’t actually work for them
Practical strategies or ideas for parents who are dealing with that challenge of technology being useful but full of distractions and how to tailor the approach if a kid is showing resistance
Seth’s thoughts on school refusal and children’s mental health

Resources mentioned for What Is / Isn't Working in School

Seth Perler’s website
Seth Perler’s YouTube Channel
Introduction to Dr. Stephen Porges’ Polyvagal Theory
A “Masterclass” in Executive Functioning with Seth Perler, Part 1 (podcast episode)
A “Masterclass” in Executive Functioning with Seth Perler, Part 2 (podcast episode)
A Conversation with Executive Functioning Coach Seth Perler (original podcast episode)
Seth Perler Talks to Asher About Resistance (podcast episode)
Seth Perler on Helping Kids Work Through Resistance, Part 2 for Parents (podcast episode)

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Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
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TPP 142a: Kayce Hughlett Talks About Her Differently Wired Son's Drug Addiction

29 juli 2022 | 47 min

My guest is Kayce Stevens Hughlett, a psychotherapist, life coach, spiritual director, and speaker, and the author of three books. Kayce and I have been friends for many years, and she was a compassionate listener and empathetic friend as I was going through some of my most challenging years with Asher. At the time, Kayce was a few years ahead in her journey with her own differently wired son, who was in his early twenties.

I wanted to bring Kayce onto the show to talk about what she and her family went through when her son, as a young teen with an ADHD diagnosis, got involved with drugs. I know that this is a possibility many parents with atypical kids fear, and in fact some listeners may be in this very situation today. Hearing Kayce tell her story and share how she not only got through it, but how her family emerged on the other side more engaged and connected, is incredibly powerful. I hope you find her story as inspiring as I do.

Kayce Stevens Hughlett started her writing career as a blogger in the early 2000’s and found her voice as a contributor to several collections and online publications. Now she is the author of three varied yet beautifully intertwined and popular books. Her 2012 nonfiction book, As I Lay Pondering: Daily Invitations To Live a Transformed Life, is a lyrical and lucid treasure that invites readers to new awakenings throughout the year. Blue: a novel, an award-winning study of three women in the Pacific Northwest, released September 10, 2015. Her journey memoir, SoulStroller: experiencing the weight, whispers, & wings of the world, was published in November 2018.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

Kayce’s story of being the mom of “that kid” in a time when being differently wired was less acceptable
The importance of listening to our gut in conjunction with “experts”
Why we want to always choose from a place of love (and not fear) when making parenting decisions
The power of community to get through difficult times with our children
Why Kayce says that parenting Jonathan through their challenges saved her life

Resources mentioned for ADHD and drug use

Kayce Stevens Hughlett’s website
SoulStroller: Experiencing the Weight, Whispers, & Wings of the World by Kayce Stevens Hughlett
Blue: A Novel by Kayce Stevens Hughlett
As I Lay Pondering: Daily Invitations To Live a Transformed Life by Kayce Stevens Hughlett

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 299: Dr. Jonine Nazar-Biesman on Navigating the Neuropsych Evaluation Process

26 juli 2022 | 45 min

The neuropsych assessment process can be daunting and complicated to navigate, especially in recent years as a result of COVID, so I’m excited to share my conversation with pediatric and adolescent young adult neuropsychologist, Dr. Jonine Nazar-Biesman. Jonine’s work is about taking into consideration the whole child and the big picture when assessments are being done.

In this episode, we talk about what parents should think about when vetting psychologists to assess their child, the difference between a neuropsych, a psychoeducational, and a psychological assessment, and how parents can navigate getting a better assessment if they believe their child got the wrong diagnosis. We also talked about what to do with all the feedback parents get from an evaluation and how that feedback can best be relayed to our kids, and to their schools.

Dr. Jonine Nazar-Biesman has over 25 years of experience specializing in assessing and treating children, adolescents, and young adults with neurodevelopmental disorders such as Autism, ADHD, learning differences, and genetic conditions. She works closely with families, treatment teams, schools, and the community to ameliorate social-emotional, behavioral, and educational challenges.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What parents should think about when looking for someone to do an assessment for their child, as well as tips for vetting evaluators
The difference between a neuropsych, a psychoeducational, and a psychological assessment
How Jonine works with students and adjusts the evaluation process during the assessment in response to what she’s discovering
How parents can navigate getting a better assessment if they believe their child got the wrong diagnosis
Whether or not a neuropsych evaluation would benefit every neurodivergent child
How feedback is ideally shared with parents, kids, and schools after an assessment has been completed
How the COVID pandemic has impacted the assessment process
How parents can best use the detailed feedback they receive as part of the neuropsych evaluation process

Resources Mentioned

For more info, visit: https://www.tiltparenting.com/session299

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
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TPP 091a: A Conversation With Steve Silberman About His Book “Neurotribes”

22 juli 2022 | 45 min

My guest this week is Steve Silberman, an award-winning science writer who authored the 2015 book NeuroTribes: The Legacy of Autism and the Future of Neurodiversity, a brilliant book that upends conventional thinking about autism and suggests a broader model for acceptance, understanding, and full participation in society for people who think differently. In our conversation, Steve and I talk about neurodivergence, autism, acceptance, tolerance, changing cultures, systemic change, and so much more.

Steve Silberman is an award-winning science writer whose articles have appeared in Wired, the New York Times, the New Yorker, the Financial Times, the Boston Globe, the MIT Technology Review, and more.and the author of NeuroTribes: The Legacy of Autism and the Future of Neurodiversity (Avery 2015), which Oliver Sacks called a “sweeping and penetrating history…presented with a rare sympathy and sensitivity.” In April 2016, Silberman gave the keynote speech at the United Nations for World Autism Awareness Day. He has given talks on the history of autism at Yale, Harvard, MIT, Oxford, the National Academy of Sciences, Queen Mary University, Apple, Microsoft, Google, the 92nd Street Y, Imperial College London, the MIND Institute at UC Davis, and many other major institutions. His TED talk, “The Forgotten History of Autism,” has been viewed more than a million times and translated into 25 languages.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

The impetus for Steve’s book NeuroTribes
How and why the anti-vaccine movement has negatively affected the autistic community
The real impact of language like “epidemic” in relation to neurodifferences like autism
How Steve’s book NeuroTribes has been received by members of the autistic community
Steve’s thoughts on how parents raising neurodiverse kids can best support the neurodiversity movement
The importance of autistic peer mentoring

Resources mentioned for Steve Silberman, autism, and neurodiversity

Steve Silberman’s website
NeuroTribes: The Legacy of Autism and the Future of Neurodiversity by Steve Silberman
Steve Silberman’s TED Talk
The Geek Syndrome (Steve’s article in Wired Magazine, 12/01/01)
Autreat
The Thinking Person’s Guide to Autism
The Real Experts: Readings for Parents of Autistic Children

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 298: Pat Harvey on DBT and Strategies for Parenting Emotionally Intense Teens

19 juli 2022 | 39 min

Parenting a differently wired child can be challenging and as I sat down with my guest, clinical social worker Pat Harvey, to have this conversation, I wanted to acknowledge and validate the experiences we have as parents as much as we do the same for our kids. As you’ll hear from Pat, her work centers around helping parents navigate raising kids who have highly intense emotions …the kind of emotions that can cause big disruptions at home.

In this conversation, Pat talks about her book Parenting a Teen Who has Intense Emotions, how she supports families using Dialectical Behavior Therapy or DBT, the three priorities within the DBT framework, some of the critical things to understand to effectively parent emotionally intense kids, and where to start if you are looking for more support for yourself.

Pat Harvey, LCSW-C, ACSW, has been a clinical social worker for one 30 years, currently focusing on supporting and guiding parents of kids with emotional challenges using a DBT framework. The co-author of 2 books on parenting, Parenting a Child Who Has Intense Emotions and Parenting a Teen Who has Intense Emotions, a book for siblings and a book for clinicians, she has also spoken nationally and in Canada about DBT and about working with parents.

Things you'll learn from this episode:

The similarities and differences between cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT)
How DBT prioritizes the three core tenets of safety, treatment, and quality of life
Why is DBT so effective in helping teens who are engaging in risky behaviors, including self-harm, suicidal ideation, or past suicide attempts
Critical things to be aware of in order to effectively parent emotionally intense kids
The biggest roadblock for parents that prevent them from leaning into DBT
Where to start and the things to pay attention to if you are parenting an emotionally intense kid

Resources mentioned for DBT & Parenting Emotionally Intense Teens:

Pat Harvey’s website
Parenting a Teen Who has Intense Emotions: DBT Skills to Help Your Teen Navigate Emotional and Behavioral Challenges by Pat Harvey and Britt Rathbone
Parenting a Child Who Has Intense Emotions: Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills to Help Your Child Regulate Emotional Outbursts and Aggressive Behaviors by Pat Harvey and Jeanine Penzo
Hey, I'm Here Too!: A Book for Tween/Teen Siblings of a Young Person With Emotional Issues by Pat Harvey

For more info, visit: https://www.tiltparenting.com/session298

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Connect with Tilt Parenting

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Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
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TPP 139a: Psychologist Scott Barry Kaufman, PhD on Redefining Giftedness and Intelligence

15 juli 2022 | 46 min

My guest Scott Barry Kaufman PhD, a psychologist, author, and podcaster who is passionate about changing, or perhaps expanding, the way intelligence is defined and measured. In our conversation, we talk about his ideas about intelligence, potential, and what it actually takes for our children to develop into self-actualized adults.

Scott is a cognitive scientist and humanistic psychologist exploring the mind, creativity, and the depths of human potential. He is a professor at Columbia University and founder and director of the Center for the Science of Human Potential. Dr. Kaufman received a B.S. in psychology and human computer interaction from Carnegie Mellon, an M. Phil in experimental psychology from the University of Cambridge under a Gates Cambridge Scholarship, and a Ph.D. in cognitive psychology from Yale University. He is also an Honorary Principal Fellow at the University of Melbourne’s Centre for Wellbeing Science.

Dr. Kaufman hosts the The Psychology Podcast, and his writing has appeared in The Atlantic, Scientific American, Psychology Today, and Harvard Business Review. He is the author and editor of 9 books, including his latest book Transcend: The New Science of Self-Actualization.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

Why Scott believes traditional markers of intelligence are missing the mark
The problem with assessing for “labels” instead a child’s highest strengths
Scott’s thoughts on how we can create a better educational model
Why potential in our children is a “moving target”
How gifted education as a construct has a “fixed mindset”
Scott’s ideas for expanding the definition of intelligence through a multiple manifestations of intelligence lens
Why we should focus on self-actualization as opposed to excellence
What qualities we should be helping our children develop to become self-actualized

Resources mentioned for redefining giftedness

Scott Barry Kaufman’s website
Scott at Scientific American Magazine
Scott’s podcast, The Psychology Podcast
Ungifted: Intelligence Redefined by Scott Barry Kaufman
Wired to Create: Unraveling the Mysteries of the Creative Mind by Scott Barry Kaufman
Twice Exceptional: Supporting and Educating Bright and Creative Students with Learning Difficulties by Scott Barry Kaufman
Scott’s TEDxZumbroRiver Talk: A New Theory of Hum

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Connect with Tilt Parenting

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TPP 297: Jennifer Natalya Fink on Disability Lineage — What It Is and How it Impacts Families

12 juli 2022 | 44 min

In this conversation with Jennifer Natalya Fink, we explore the nuances of her fascinating new book, All Our Families: Disability Lineage and the Future of Kinship. The premise of Jennifer’s book is that disability is often described as a tragedy, a crisis, or an aberration, even though more than 1 in 5 people worldwide have a disability. She wanted to explore the question: Why is this common human experience rendered exceptional?

Instead, Jennifer is advocating for a reclamation of disability as a history, a culture, and an identity. She is pushing for a world where families see disability in the context of a collective sense of belonging, as cause for celebration, and is a call for a radical reimagining of carework and kinship.

We went deep into this idea of a disability lineage, and Jennifer shared what’s at stake if we don’t know and claim our family history. We also discussed why getting a disability diagnosis can be traumatic for families and how it’s accentuated by how our society thinks about disability. Lastly, Jennifer shared her thoughts on making the care system more equitable by embracing disability as a collective experience rather than something individual families have to deal with.

***

Jennifer Natalya Fink is director of the Program in Disability Studies and a professor of English at Georgetown University. She is the author of 6 books and founder of the Gorilla Press, a nonprofit promoting youth literacy through bookmaking. Fink is the winner of the Dana Award for the Novel and the Catherine Doctorow Prize for Innovative Fiction, as well as a finalist for the Lambda Literary Award. First and foremost, she is a mother; the transformative experience of parenting her autistic daughter is the center of her work.

Things you’ll learn from this episode

How Jennifer’s own family story led her to be interested in researching disability and disability lineage
What a disability lineage is
Why getting a disability diagnosis can be traumatic for families and how it’s accentuated by our society’s views of disability
The importance of understanding that care and disability are woven into the human experience
What we are losing out on by not knowing our family disability history as families raising differently wired kids
How even good-intentioned comments can feed ableist beliefs
How we can work to make the care system more equitable, including seeing disability as a collective experience rather than something families must face on an individual basis

Resources mentioned for Disability Lineage — What It Is and How it Impacts Families

For more info, visit: https://www.tiltparenting.com/session297

Support the show

Connect with Tilt Parenting

Visit Tilt Parenting
Take the free 7-Day Challenge
Read a chapter of Differently Wired
Follow Tilt on Twitter & Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

TPP 046a: Anders Ronnau Talks About His Powerful Approach to Transforming ADHD

8 juli 2022 | 45 min

TPP 296: A Conversation with Dr. Marcia Eckerd on Nonverbal Learning Disorder (NVLD)

5 juli 2022 | 42 min

TILT Parenting: Raising Differently Wired Kids

TiLT Parenting, from parenting activist, speaker, and author Debbie Reber, features transformational interviews and conversations with authors, parenting experts, educators, and other parents aimed at...

Om podden

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TPP 407: Nutritionist Jill Castle on Helping Kids Thrive at Every Size

About Jill Castle

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 159a: Inside The Flex School with Founder Jacqui Byrne

TPP 406: Parent Lean-In: How Do I Talk With My Child About a New Autism Diagnosis?

TPP 405: Navigating PDA in America, with Diane Gould and Ruth Fidler

About Diane Gould

About Ruth Fidler

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 158a: The Self-Driven Child with William Stixrud and Ned Johnson

TPP 404: Sara Olsher on Walking Children Through Hard Seasons of Life

About Sara Olsher

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 155a: Inside Landmark College's Unique Approach to Supporting Neurodivergent Students

TPP 403: The Connection Between Differently Wired Kids and Substance Use, with Brenda Zane

About Brenda Zane

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned:

TPP 154a: Dr. Mona Delahooke on Looking Beyond Children's Challenging Behaviors

TPP 402: Parent Lean-In: How Can I Help My Autistic Child with Low Self-Esteem?

TPP 401: Dr. Billy Garvey on Supporting Our Child’s Mental Health Through the Years

About Dr. Billy Garvey

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 152a: Education Thought Leader Jordan Shapiro on Screens, Kids, and His Book "The New Childhood"

TPP 400: Michele Turk’s Journey of Parenting a Child with Tourette’s Syndrome

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 150a: Heather Turgeon and Julie Wright On Handling Common Parenting Dilemmas

You Might Also Like: In It: Raising Kids who Learn Differently, from Understood.org

TPP 399: Dr. Jeff Karp on Helping Our Kids Energize Their Brain, Spark Ideas & Ignite Action

About Dr. Jeff Karp

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 144a: Psychotherapist Dr. Sharon Saline on What Your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew

TPP 398: Parent Lean-In — Help! I Don't Know How to Respond to My Teen's Impusivity & Disruptive Behavior

TPP 397: Dr. Deborah Winking on Raising Capable Kids, Regardless of Diagnosis or Challenge

About Deborah Winking, Ph.D

Things you'll learn from this episode

Resources mentioned for Raising Capable Kids, Regardless of Diagnosis or Challenge

TPP 120a: Back to School Special with Understood's Amanda Morin

TPP 396: Robyn Gobbel on Raising Kids with Big, Baffling Behaviors

About Robyn Gobbel

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 141a: Therapist Debbie Steinberg Kuntz on Easing the Struggle for Bright and Quirky / 2e Kids

TPP 395: Where Are We in the Neurodiversity Movement? with Marcus Soutra

About Marcus Soutra

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 136a: KJ Dell'Antonia on How to Be a Happier Parent

TPP 394: Parent Lean-In — How Can I Help My Child Be More Flexible & Less Argumentative?

TPP 393: Dr. Mel Houser on Navigating the Healthcare System as a Neurodivergent Person

About Dr. Mel Houser

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 133a: College Admissions Expert Marisa Meddin on Application Strategies for Atypical Students

TPP 392: Cara Bean on Comics and Mental Health for Kids

About Cara Bean

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 130a: Julie Skolnick of With Understanding Comes Calm on Advocating for 2e Kids

TPP 391: Perry LaRoque on What Neurodivergent Students Need to Successfully Navigate College

About Dr. Perry LaRoque

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 124a: Seth Perler on How Parents Can Help Their Kids Work Through Resistance

TPP 390: Parent Lean-In — How Can We Improve Communication & Get Better Support from a Developmental Pediatrician?

TPP 389: Ginger Whitson on Helping Kids Navigate Feeling Angry

About Ginger Whitson

Things you'll learn

Resources mentioned

TPP 123a: Seth Perler Talks to Asher About Resistance—Special Kid Episode