Judgement

Support the show:
https://www.paypal.me/Truelifepodcast?locale.x=en_US

Buy Grow kit:
https://modernmushroomcultivation.com/

Speaker 0 (0s): Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to the true life podcast. I hope you're all having a beautiful day. Hope the sun is shining, hope you're feeling great. And I truly hope that the world in which you find yourself today is smiling at you, treating you well. I want to talk to you today about judgment, not so much. The final judgment, where you sit in front of a panel of white robed, goddesses and gods, and they put your heart and your soul on a scale on one side and then a feather on the other, not bad judgment. 

Although that sounds kind of beautiful and poetic. Doesn't it? I like to think about that. Sometimes. I like to think about the judgment we do for ourselves upon other people and why it's good and why it's bad. I find myself very judgmental at times, and while it serves me, well, it also serves to stop you in your tracks. Let me give you an example of what I mean. 

Sometimes you see what it is you want to see in the environment. And it's often a it's often a sign. Let me just throw this example at you. I find myself at times in a pretty toxic environment. And to me, a toxic environment is being surrounded by people that are doing things that I despise about myself being greedy, being selfish, being weak. 

I know a guy who turned his back on his family. I'm going to give you two examples. One is one way to look at it. And another way is another way to look at it. And I'm gonna talk about how I feel about them. So in scenario one, I know a guy that cares nothing about people, only about money. He cheated on his wife. He fails to lead the very people he claims to be in charge of when, when you push them and say, why are you doing these things? 

You know, what you're doing is wrong, but you do them anyway. He says, I'm scared. I'm afraid I can't do it. George I'm scared. And when I confronted him and said, these exact words, why are you doing this? You know, it took some prodding to get to that point. I have to point out all the flaws in their argument. As far as you know, immediately, I'm attacked. Hey George, you're doing this all wrong. You're this you're that? 

There's just all these ad hominem attacks being thrown at me. And when I point out, look, that's not true. What you're saying about me is not true. I'm not slow. I'm not weak. I'm not dumb. You're judging me on a very short amount of time. Why don't you judge me on the whole time I've been here. And then they come with their facts about, well, look at our numbers here. Look at our numbers there. And I said, well, you're, you're not judging. Those numbers are not an accurate measurement of me. 

And it's tough to do that because the system is set up for an adversarial system. It's set up for people to attack you, especially when you have several people planning their argument. Before you have the luxury of sitting down and understanding what they're gonna attack you with. And so when I, when you're in that environment, when I was in that environment, I find myself pushing back and sometimes successfully, sometimes not successfully successfully in that you can be calm and you can say to them, no, no, you're, you're, that's you're wrong there. 

That is a ad hominem attack. No, no, no, no, you're wrong. There you are attacking my character and not the issue. And so when I've been successful and I could do that, I can pin them down. And then that's when I say, why are you doing this? You know, what's wrong. You're making all these accusations that are false. And you're trying to pin your inability to solve problems on me. Why are you doing that? And the answer I get is we're scared. 

We're afraid. And on one hand that makes me hate those people so much. It makes me look at them and go, yeah, I know, I know you're afraid. Look at your life. You've turned your back on your wife. You've turned your back on your family. Your daughter will hate you for ever forever. She's going to hate you. Don't you understand that, but they don't understand that because they live in fear. You see, they are so paralyzed by fear that they would turn their back on the people that love them the most. 

And part of me like it just makes me disgusted by them. It makes me think horrible things should happen to them. It makes me think to myself, you don't even deserve to be here. You're fucking disgusting. You have, you have had so much beautiful, sacred beauty bestowed upon you. And you decided that dammit, I don't want any of it. I'm too. I'm too scared to even commit to it. 

That's how I think on one hand. And it's interesting to me, cause I see the particular duo I'm talking about is like an old guy and a young guy. And I can see the young guy becoming this old guy. And I try to tell the young, I look, you're going to be just like that guy. You are going to become this old guy that turns his back on his family. I already see it. I already see it. You see, when you decide, when you make a conscious decision to do things that you know are wrong and you admit to yourself, he all these things, I'm doing a wrong, I shouldn't do these, but then you do them anyway. 

Every time you do that, you destroy a little piece of your soul and you're going to fucking hate yourself later in life. And part of me is like, you're gonna fucking deserve it. And then I go way off on the edge. And I'm like, you know what? Yeah, I hope that happens to them. I hope this guy continues to go down the pathway of just fucking over the very people he claims to lead. So that later in life, his fucking people will hate him. And he'll be alone in the fetal position, crying underneath the copier on one level. 

I think that, and it makes me, so it just feels so gross to be around these guys. Like all they care about is money. That's it, that's it. And they're too afraid to stand up for the very people that would help them. They don't even ask the people for help. All they want is to be left alone in their little corner and have peep. And in their own little mind have people worship them. It's so gross to me. Okay. That's the negative part. And like, I struggle not to think that whenever I look at them, that's I see that. And it, it makes me sad and disgusted and not even want to be. 

I don't want to look at them like they're just gross to me. And then on the other hand, I feel bad. I feel guilty because I'm scared and I have committed some of these same things. What does that say about me? What does it mean if I can identify those qualities in another person? 

Well, that probably means that I'm guilty of some of those qualities. That probably means that I am guilty. I am scared. Maybe the way I don't know. Do you just start thinking about it? Do you just choose not to see that? 

You just put your, I mean, and if you do do that, are you putting your blinders up and just pretending not to participate in it, even though it's still there, maybe that's the answer. Maybe you're always by man's kinds in ability to solve problems. Maybe this is what they talk about in certain passages. Like the path of the righteous man is be set on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Bless it. As he who shepherds the week of the valley of death for he is truly his brother's keeper. 

And the finder of lost souls though. I walk through the valley of the shadow of death. I shall fear no evil. Maybe that's what that is. Maybe that's what that is. You gotta be careful not to get caught up on that path because you care and you start thinking about this stuff, you sta...