You Make Sense

Do you ever feel like there’s an invisible wall holding you back from the life you desire? In this episode, Sarah explores why achieving our goals can feel so difficult—even when we’re putting in the effort. The key to unlocking our full potential lies in understanding and befriending our autonomic nervous system, which shapes our entire experience and the ease in which we’re able to take steps forward. 

By viewing the nervous system as a vehicle, Sarah shares practical strategies for how to guide your nervous system down roads that lead to your deepest desires. Through the power of nervous system regulation, parts work, and safe connection, it’s possible to get unstuck and tangibly move toward a more full, expansive life.

Episode Highlight:

00:00 Intro

01:35 The Vehicle Inside You (Your Nervous System)

07:31 The Roads of Your Deepest Desires

19:02 What Determines the Size of Your Life

23:52 Building Capacity in Your Nervous System

26:48: 4 Things That Don’t Actually Work

27:46 #1 - “Muscling Through” 

30:08 #2 - Setting Unattainable Goals

32:43 #3 - Taking Steps in Isolation

34:52 #4 - Comparing Our Self to Others

36:28 Building a Bridge to Where You Want to Go

40:48 Cultivating Safe Community and Connection

42:07 Start Honoring Your ‘NO’

44:58 “What About Taking the Big, Scary Step?”

49:44 “How to Take Tolerable Steps in Dating?”

53:27 “Why Is It So Hard to Take Steps Forward?”     

Join the Expansion Experience:

Ready to start expanding into a bigger life? Join Sarah’s 3-day live experience for tangible somatic tools to break through stagnancy and start expanding. First call starts on March 17th with replays available for a limited time.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-ee

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

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Important Keywords:

Autonomic Nervous System - The body's command center for automatic functions like breathing, heart rate, and digestion. It also plays a vital role in how we respond to stress and perceived threats, as well as our ability to feel safe, connected, and regulated.

Roads of Safety - The pathways our nervous system recognizes as safe and predictable, often shaped by past experiences. While they provide comfort and stability, they may not always align with our true desires or highest potential.

Roads of Familiarity - The patterns and dynamics we've learned to navigate—whether healthy or not. Our nervous system tends to gravitate toward familiar routes because they offer a sense of control, even if they don’t always serve our well-being.

Safe Connection - The deep sense of being seen, heard, and understood by others, fostering a feeling of belonging and security. Safe connection is essential for regulating the nervous system and expanding our capacity for growth, healing, and change.

In this episode of You Make Sense, Sarah explores the science behind relationships using Polyvagal Theory, Attachment Theory, and Parts Work. She explains how these frameworks complement each other and shape our ability to connect, feel safe inside our relational containers, and navigate emotional intimacy.

Sarah highlights the importance of understanding how our nervous system and parts inform the people we choose in our lives, emphasizing that much of what we experience in adult connections is rooted in early life experiences. By combining these three approaches, it’s possible to heal the past in the present, navigate challenges with more ease, and attract the kinds of partners we truly desire.

Episode Highlight:

00:00 Introduction

00:15 Understanding Our Relationships

02:00 The Nervous System & Attachment Theory

09:02 How Attachments Form

16:04 How We Connect In Our Adult Lives

21:24 How to Regulate Based On Your Attachment Style

22:12 The Nervous System & Parts Work

32:58 How “Self-Like Parts” Show Up

39:07 Why Moving On Can Be So Challenging 

49:29 Avoidant Attachment & Healing Shame

53:03 Panic In Relationships

Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:

Feeling stuck in any area of your life? Take Sarah’s quiz to learn more about the self-protective system inside you that’s often responsible for your stuckness—and how to harness its power to step toward the life you desire.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook -

https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast 

Important Keywords:

Polyvagal Theory – A framework explaining how the autonomic nervous system governs safety, connection, and self-protective responses in our relationships and lives.

Attachment Theory – A psychological model describing how early childhood experiences shape relational patterns, emotional bonds, and the way we connect with others.

Parts Work – A therapeutic approach (e.g., Internal Family Systems) that explores different parts or aspects of the self and their roles in emotional healing.

Nervous System Regulation – Techniques and practices that help manage stress responses, promoting emotional balance and internal safety.

Avoidant Attachment – A self-protective relational pattern where connection can often feel overwhelming and individuals subconsciously withdraw from intimacy due to past emotional wounds.

Anxious Attachment – A self-protective relational pattern where we feel less safe on our own and often sacrifice our own needs in order to maintain connection with another.

Disorganized Attachment – A self-protective relational pattern where we tend to feel comfortable in chaos and want others close, but when they come close, we push them away.

Shame & Internalization – The process of internalizing negative beliefs about oneself, often rooted in childhood experiences of criticism or neglect.

What if there was a way to find more lightness and joy in your healing journey along the way? In this episode of You Make Sense, Sarah explores the profound impact of two transformative states within the autonomic nervous system: play and stillness. These states aren’t just about fun and quiet—they’re the keys to unlocking creativity, emotional regulation, and deeper connections.

Sarah shares practical tips to help you embrace these vital states, from finding freedom through dance and movement to building rituals that invite inner peace. Whether you’re using play to resolve conflict in your relationships or creating a nighttime stillness routine for better sleep, this episode offers a roadmap to navigate life with greater ease and aliveness.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:17 Play and Stillness

02:03 3 States of Dysregulation

03:00 Getting to Know Your Blended State of Play

11:06 Why Do We Struggle to Experience Play?

15:09 Tools to Begin Stepping Toward Play

19:20 Getting to Know Your Blended State of Stillness

26:40 Why Do We Struggle to Experience Stillness?

30:02 Tools to Begin Stepping Toward Stillness

38:18 “How Do I Feel More Playful and Free While Dancing?”

50:41 “Why Doesn’t Meditation Work For Me?”

59:42 “How Can Play Help Improve My Relationship?” 

Download Sarah’s FREE Workbook: 

Want free trauma-informed tools? Download Sarah’s free workbook, “How to Gain Control Over How You Feel,” for actionable prompts and exercises to help you start feeling better on a daily basis.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

Autonomic Nervous System (ANS) - The autonomic nervous system is a part of the nervous system that operates unconsciously to regulate vital bodily functions such as heart rate, digestion, and respiratory rate. It has two primary branches: the sympathetic (activates fight-or-flight responses) and parasympathetic (promotes our rest-and-digest state along with our dorsal vagal complex), which are integral in supporting us to experience both regulation and dysregulation. 

Play - Play is a blended state within the autonomic nervous system, made primarily of regulation (ventral vagal complex) with a touch of mobilizing sympathetic energy (sympathetic nervous system). It fosters creativity, learning, and bonding by bringing joy and aliveness into life experiences.

Stillness - Stillness is a state predominantly rooted in regulation (ventral vagal complex) with a subtle influence of the dorsal vagal complex. It encourages deep presence, better sleep, intimacy and emotional connection, and rejuvenation, allowing individuals to fully embrace quiet, restorative moments.

Ventral Vagal Complex - The ventral vagal complex is part of the parasympathetic nervous system associated with safety and regulation. It governs states of connection, calm, and engagement with others, enabling social bonding and overall well-being.

Sympathetic Nervous System - The sympathetic nervous system is responsible for activating the fight-or-flight response, preparing the body to react to real or perceived threats. It increases energy and alertness, mobilizing the body for action when needed.

Dorsal Vagal Complex - The dorsal vagal complex is a branch of the parasympathetic nervous system linked to immobilization and shutdown responses. It becomes active in extreme stress or trauma and helps us to leave our bodies, resulting in feelings of disconnection or dissociation.

Shame often keeps us from living the full, expansive life we’re desiring. In this episode of You Make Sense, Sarah explains the difference between “healthy” and “unhealthy” shame, and why unresolved trauma can often leave us feeling unworthy or like there is something inherently wrong with us.

While shame can affect every area of our lives, from our relationships to our purpose, the good news is that it’s absolutely possible to heal. Sarah will walk you through tangible somatic steps to bring your nervous system back into internal safety and access your healthy aggression or “life force energy,” both of which are imperative to releasing shame and finding freedom in your everyday life.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:26 What is Healthy Shame?

04:29 What is Unhealthy Shame?

11:55 How the Internalization of Shame Occurs

13:59 How to Resolve Unhealthy Shame

18:43 Accessing Healthy Aggression

21:25 Parts Work & Embodying Your Creativity

27:10 Processing the Underlying Activation of Panic Attacks

33:17 Being Ferociously Protective of Your Own Story

37:52 Shame Around Experiencing Setbacks

Work with Sarah inside the You Make Sense course:

Looking for tools to heal every area of your life? You Make Sense is a 10-week live somatic healing course that will help you to address your relationships, purpose, younger parts, boundaries, thoughts, and more!

Join the waitlist by March 4th for limited-time reduced pricing:

https://bit.ly/sp-yms-waitlist

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

Healthy Shame - Healthy shame teaches individuals about boundaries, consequences, and experiencing health in relationships and life. It begins to occur during early developmental stages and builds resilience to navigate stress and be with affect in our bodies. In the process, we are not made to feel like we are inherently bad or unlovable.

Unhealthy Shame - Unhealthy shame is the internalization of what happened to us (or what was said to us) making one feel inherently bad and unworthy. This type of shame is often rooted in traumatic experiences and can result in long-lasting psychological distress.

Nervous System Regulation - Nervous system regulation involves managing the body's response to stress and stimuli through various techniques that help maintain or restore a state of balance. It is crucial for emotional resilience and overall mental health.

Somatic Experiencing - Somatic Experiencing is a modality developed by Peter Levine that uses the body to release stored trauma and activation. This approach is grounded in science that confirms the body holds past trauma, and that through somatic healing and completing the incomplete experience, we can release the stored traumatic energy and consequently, the past becomes the past rather than the perpetual present.

Trauma - Trauma is the overwhelm of activation (energy) experienced in our bodies, in the face of helplessness. If we do not have the conditions necessary for trauma to process through our bodies, it becomes stuck and stored, leaving lasting emotional, physical or psychological imprints. It disrupts the nervous system causing chronic dysregulation, disconnection and/or hypervigilance.

Internalization - Internalization is a psychological process where individuals unconsciously integrate the beliefs, values, and norms of others into their own self-view. In the context of shame, it often refers to the absorption of negative beliefs about oneself that are derived from critical or dismissive messaging and treatment by others.

Diving into the often overlooked but deeply interconnected realms of science and spirituality, Sarah guides listeners through a transformative exploration. She underscores how both domains intertwine, particularly in the context of trauma and healing. Many of us desire to embody the core elements of spirituality—connectivity, presence, love, and surrender—but struggle to actually do so.

This episode will address the common misconceptions and challenges associated with spirituality, including the impact of trauma on our capacity to experience deep levels of connectivity. She critiques the prevalent shaming in spiritual contexts, advocating for a more empathetic and inclusive approach.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

01:36 What is Spirituality?

07:56 Most Trauma is Relational

15:58 Processing Your Anger Toward the Universe

22:53 Unlocking Connectivity to Your Spirituality

31:51 Spiritual Journey and Nervous System Work

33:19 Healing is Spiritual Work

41:54 “How Does Plant Medicine Relate to the Nervous System?”

49:35 “Why Do I Feel Like I Have No Spiritual Connection?”

Join Sarah’s Email Community

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Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

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Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

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Important Keywords:

Trauma Resolution - A process aimed at addressing and healing from traumatic experiences. Trauma resolution involves somatic therapeutic techniques that help individuals process and discharge stored traumatic energy from their bodies, reducing the ongoing impact on their mental and physical health.

Nervous System Regulation - Refers to the practices and techniques used to maintain or return the nervous system to a state of balance. Effective regulation helps individuals manage their responses to stress and recover from experiences of chronic dysregulation, such as anxiety, depression, overwhelm, panic, or other trauma-related symptoms.

Interconnectivity - A key concept in spirituality that denotes the interconnected nature of all things in the universe, including the self, others, and the environment. It suggests that everything is linked, and leaning into these connections can lead to deeper levels of regulation and support overall wellbeing. 

Spirituality - Often defined broadly as a sense of connection to something bigger than oneself, which can involve a search for meaning in life. Spirituality is personal and can encompass religious beliefs, personal values, and practices aimed at cultivating inner peace, deeper connectivity, love, and surrender.

Somatic Experiencing - A therapeutic modality developed by Dr. Peter Levine aimed at resolving the mental, emotional, and physical symptoms of stored trauma by focusing on the body.

The secret to changing your thoughts isn’t in your mind—it’s in your body. In this episode of You Make Sense, Sarah uses Polyvagal Theory to unravel the fascinating science behind how our nervous system shapes our story and why just telling ourselves to “think” differently doesn’t actually work.

In order to change our thinking, we must first address the underlying dysregulation in our system. Sarah will walk you through tangible somatic practices to shift toward regulation, create new neural pathways for more “positive” thoughts, and find clarity on your truth. By harnessing the power of your nervous system, it’s possible to transform your inner world.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:49 Our Autonomic State Creates Our Story

07:29 Thoughts in Dorsal (Immobilization)

09:19 Thoughts in Sympathetic (Mobilization) 

11:15 Thoughts in Freeze (Tonic Immobility)

12:38 Thoughts in Ventral (Regulation)

15:09 Projecting Your Past Onto the Present

17:03 We Cannot Change Our Thinking in Dysregulation

20:20 Limitations of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

28:09 “Why Do Thoughts I Know To Be Wrong Feel So True?”

36:58 How to Overcome Negative Thoughts

44:29 Mindset Work & Manifestation From A Somatic Lens

Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:

Feeling stuck in any area of your life? Take Sarah’s quiz to learn more about the self-protective system inside you that’s often responsible for your stuckness—and how to harness its power to step toward the life you desire.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Contact Us:

Have questions? Want to let us know how you’re liking the podcast? Reach out to Sarah’s support team at [email protected]. 

Important Keywords:

Nervous System - The nervous system regulates bodily functions and responses to stress, consisting of the sympathetic (fight/flight) and parasympathetic (rest/digest) systems, comprised of our ventral vagal complex (rest and digest) and our dorsal vagal complex (shutdown/energy conservation). A well-regulated nervous system supports emotional balance, overall well-being, and supportive thoughts.

Polyvagal Theory - A theory developed by Dr. Stephen Porges, explaining how the autonomic nervous system responds to safety or threat through three primary states: Ventral Vagal Complex (regulation and connection), Sympathetic Nervous System (mobilization), and Dorsal Vagal Complex (immobilization). This framework helps understand how our physiological state influences thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and perception.

Dysregulation - Active self-protection in response to real or perceived threats, leading to physiological and emotional imbalance. It can manifest as anxiety, depression, apathy, or other distressing emotions and can hinder clear thinking or positive actions.

Sympathetic Nervous System - The branch of the autonomic nervous system associated with mobilization or the fight-or-flight response. When activated, it increases energy, heart rate, and alertness to prepare for action.

Dorsal Vagal Complex - A part of the parasympathetic nervous system responsible for immobilization or the shutdown response. It activates in extreme situations of perceived danger, leading to feelings of numbness, dissociation, or hopelessness.

Ventral Vagal Complex - The branch of the parasympathetic nervous system associated with regulation, safety, connection, and presence. It supports social engagement, calmness, and the ability to rest and recover.

Freeze Response - A blended state made of equal parts mobilizing Sympathetic energy and immobilizing Dorsal energy, creating a sense of urgency to act but an inability to do so. It often feels like being "stuck" or overwhelmed.

Perceived Threat - A situation or stimulus that the nervous system interprets as dangerous, even if it is not an immediate danger in reality. It often stems from past trauma being projected onto the present.

If slowing down feels impossible or like a luxury you can’t afford, this episode is for you. Sarah unpacks why so many of us stay trapped in a cycle of constant “doing,” where rest feels risky and burnout becomes inevitable. Drawing on her expertise in Somatic Experiencing, Polyvagal Theory, and Parts Work, she explains how your past, trauma, and societal expectations can all keep you stuck on the hamster wheel.

You’ll get simple, actionable steps to show your nervous system that slowing down isn’t just safe—it’s powerful. Whether it’s finding joy in a quiet walk, saying no to one more email, or unburdening your protective parts, this episode will help you reconnect with your body and bring regulation to your nervous system. Slowing down isn’t giving up—it’s the key to embodying the life and abundance you’re desiring.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:40 Your Environment Influences Your Nervous System

03:13 The Sympathetic Nervous System

06:44 The Origin of Our Protective Parts

11:55 Building Your Capacity to Slow Down

17:01 Somatic Tool: Disconfirming Experiences

19:31 Somatic Tool: Taking Tolerable Steps

21:25 Get to Know Your Protective Parts

24:04 “I Feel Like I’m Constantly in a Dysregulated State”

30:04 The Expand/Contract Experience of Healing 

34:34 Somatic Support for Difficult Life, Political, or World Events

Looking for Deeper Support on Your Healing Journey?

The next opportunity to work with Sarah is her 10-week program, You Make Sense! This comprehensive video-based course with weekly live Q&As will give you tangible somatic tools to address every area of your life.

Join the waitlist for limited-time reduced pricing coming in March 2025:

https://bit.ly/sp-yms-waitlist

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

Sympathetic Nervous System - The sympathetic nervous system is part of the autonomic nervous system responsible for mobilizing energy in response to perceived threats. By activating the HPA axis, cortisol and adrenaline levels are increased in the body, preparing our system to respond to danger and stress. Chronic activation of this system can lead to anxiety, burnout, and health issues.

Regulation - Regulation refers to the ability to maintain or return to a state of safety, presence, and connection within the nervous system. A regulated nervous system promotes calmness, focus, and the capacity to handle life's challenges effectively. Building regulation involves consistent neural exercises and creating disconfirming experiences that show your body it’s safe to come into a state of rest.

Trauma - Trauma is the overwhelm of activation (energy) experienced in our bodies, in the face of helplessness. If we do not have the conditions necessary for trauma to process through our bodies, it becomes stuck and stored, leaving lasting emotional, physical or psychological imprints. It disrupts the nervous system causing chronic dysregulation, disconnection and/or hypervigilance.

Protective Parts - Protective parts are internal mechanisms (or versions of ourselves) developed to shield us from pain or harm, often formed during childhood. These parts use behaviors like perfectionism, overachievement, or avoidance to keep us safe from perceived threats. While they are well-intentioned, they can also keep us stuck in unhelpful patterns until their needs are addressed.

Somatic Healing - Somatic healing focuses on addressing trauma and stress stored in the body, rather than just the mind. It involves practices that help release trapped activation/energy, regulate the nervous system and complete the incomplete response to trauma of the past, and reconnect with the physical self. Techniques like movement, touch, and breathwork are commonly used to support this healing process.

How often do we hear, “Just love your body,” only to feel more disconnected than ever? In this thoughtful episode of You Make Sense, Sarah tackles the complexities of body image, aging, appearance, and the journey to genuine self-acceptance. With her signature mix of science, storytelling, and somatic wisdom, she unpacks why conventional approaches to self-love often miss the mark—and what truly works.

Sarah shares relatable personal stories and actionable tools to help you heal your relationship with your body, process past trauma, and embrace your unique self. From reframing societal pressures to building a compassionate connection with your body, this episode offers practical steps for feeling more at home in your own skin.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

02:45 Society’s Messaging About Body Image

11:15 Befriending Your Body

13:54 Why Do We Hide in Our Body?

19:57 Trauma & Changing Our Appearance

22:18 The Origin of Our Negative Orientation to Aging

26:18 Somatic Tools to Build Self-Love and Acceptance

31:09 Replace Coping Strategies with Regulating Resources

38:01 “Why Am I Suddenly Negatively Fixated on My Height?”

43:16 Somatically Healing Your Relationship with Your Body

51:56 Binge-Eating and Sugar

01:02:14 Weight Gain Can Be a Response to Trauma    

Download Sarah’s FREE Workbook: 

Want free trauma-informed tools? Download Sarah’s free workbook, “How to Gain Control Over How You Feel,” for actionable prompts and exercises to help you start feeling better on a daily basis.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

Somatic Healing - Somatic healing is an approach to healing that focuses on addressing the nervous system and stored trauma within the body. It uses practices like body awareness, movement, and nervous system regulation to support emotional and physical well-being.

Trauma - Trauma is the overwhelm of activation (energy) experienced in our bodies, in the face of helplessness. If we do not have the conditions necessary for trauma to process through our bodies, it becomes stuck and stored, leaving lasting emotional, physical or psychological imprints. It disrupts the nervous system causing chronic dysregulation, disconnection and/or hypervigilance.

Self-Compassion - Self-compassion involves treating oneself with kindness, understanding, and care, especially during difficult times. It replaces self-criticism with empathy, fostering emotional resilience and self-acceptance.

Dissociation - Dissociation is a coping mechanism where a person disconnects from their physical or emotional experiences, often in response to trauma or stress. It can manifest as a sense of detachment from reality, feeling "numb," or being "out of body."

Parts Work - Parts work is a therapeutic approach that identifies and works with different "parts" of the self, often associated with distinct emotions, behaviors, or events from childhood. It helps individuals address internal conflicts and foster self-integration.

Nervous System - The nervous system regulates bodily functions and responses to stress, consisting of the sympathetic (fight/flight) and parasympathetic (rest/digest) systems, comprised of our ventral vagal complex (rest and digest) and our dorsal vagal complex (shutdown/energy conservation). A well-regulated nervous system supports emotional balance, energy levels, and overall health.

This episode unpacks the vital connection between our nervous system and how we lead—in business, at home, and in life. Sarah dives into the science of regulation, exploring how dysregulated states like fight/flight, freeze, or shut down often drive our decisions, keeping us stuck in survival mode. These patterns, rooted in past experiences of stress or trauma, influence how we show up as leaders, parents, and creators.

With clear explanations and actionable tools, Sarah offers a roadmap for recognizing when we’re leading from dysregulation. She shares how to cultivate a regulated nervous system, unlocking creativity, connection, and clarity. Whether you're looking to grow a business, nurture your family, or simply lead yourself with more purpose, this episode offers the practical steps to create the life—and leadership—you desire.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:26 Leading from a State of Regulation

01:20 Entrepreneurs Have Higher Stress Levels

04:28 The Most Important Thing Parents Should Focus on

06:43 Your Nervous System Affects Everyone Else

08:23 Leading from Sympathetic (fight/flight)

11:05 Leading from Regulation (safety)

13:36 Leading from Dorsal (shut down)

15:27 Leading from Freeze (tonic immobility)

17:42 Consistent Neural Exercises

20:41 How to Reshape Your Nervous System

23:02 The Key to Somatic Manifestation

26:57 Anchoring in Your Adult Self

32:30 Trust Your Own Pacing

38:19 Embodying Your Purpose  

Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:

Ready to learn more about your nervous system specific to you? Take Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck?” for a personalized guide and powerful somatic tools to help you gain control over your experience.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

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Important Keywords:

• Nervous System Regulation - The practice of bringing your system into safety in presence, which supports effective leadership, whether in business, parenting, or personal growth. Being in regulation allows for more creativity, clarity, and connection while reducing the reactive tendencies of stress and overwhelm.
• Ventral Vagal Complex - Your state of presence, safety, and connection where creativity, connection, and problem-solving thrive. It’s the optimal state for leadership and decision-making, allowing leaders to see possibilities and act with confidence.
• Co-Regulation - The process of connecting with another person in safety where each person's nervous system positively influences the others’. In leadership and parenting, co-regulation can set the tone for calm and productivity, creating a ripple effect in teams or families.
• Dysregulation - When your nervous system senses a threat (whether real or perceived), it sends you into dysregulation or active self-protection. Leading from this place can often result in stress, burnout, or stagnation.
• Capacity Building - Capacity building involves gradually increasing our ability to handle new or challenging situations. It’s about expanding the nervous system's tolerance and adaptability through small, intentional experiences of growth.

In this special New Year’s episode, Sarah invites listeners to reimagine the way they approach goals and resolutions. Kicking off the five-part Somatic Starter Kit series, Sarah dives into four reasons why traditional New Year’s resolutions often fail and offers transformative science-backed tools to use instead. You’ll learn how unresolved past experiences and traumas can keep you stuck in cycles of unmet goals.

Listeners will learn the importance of taking tolerable steps, building nervous system regulation, and fostering safe connection to support personal growth. Sarah also shares actionable insights on cultivating self-compassion, replacing coping strategies with healthier habits, and understanding the deeper desires that drive us. The episode is both a manual for self-discovery and a compassionate reminder that you make sense, just as you are.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

02:26 Reason 1: We Aren’t Addressing Our Nervous System

05:05 Do You Feel Like You’re Behind in Life?

07:03 Connecting to What You Truly Desire

09:41 Reason 2: Our Desires Often Have Flavorings of Past Danger

14:03 Reason 3: We Aren’t Addressing Our Parts

19:07 Reason 4: Lack of Support and Connection

24:19 Safe Support and Connection is Crucial

25:21 Take Tolerable Steps Towards Your Desires

30:17 Consistent Regulation of Your Nervous System 

31:37 Work at the Rate of Your Most Apprehensive Part

37:39 Relation Between Money and the Nervous System

46:00 What is a Coping Strategy?

53:54 How Do You Know Your Life’s Purpose?

01:01:36 Trying Something New Can Feel Overwhelming

Join the Navigating Your Nervous System Waitlist:

Want access to limited-time pricing for Sarah’s upcoming 6-week course? Make sure to get on the waitlist for Navigating Your Nervous System by January 5th to take advantage of the 24-hour only $100 off bonus.

https://bit.ly/sp-nyns-waitlist

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

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Important Keywords:

• Nervous System Regulation - This refers to practices that help balance the body's stress response, promoting a state of calm and safety. By regulating the nervous system, we can better handle challenges, make intentional choices, and build resilience in the face of discomfort or fear.
• Coping Strategies - These are habits or behaviors developed to manage discomfort or stress, often unconsciously. While they can serve as short-term relief, understanding and replacing maladaptive strategies with healthier alternatives promotes long-term well-being.
• Somatic Healing - Somatic healing focuses on reconnecting with the body to release tension and process trauma. This approach integrates physical sensations, emotions, and thoughts to foster self-awareness and recovery.
• Parts Work - This therapeutic concept involves recognizing and addressing different "parts" or aspects of ourselves, often tied to past experiences or emotional wounds. By understanding and integrating these parts, we can move toward greater wholeness and self-compassion.
• Safe Connection - Safe connection refers to relationships where we feel seen, valued, and accepted without judgment. These connections are essential for emotional and nervous system regulation, providing a foundation for personal growth.
• Capacity Building - Capacity building involves gradually increasing our ability to handle new or challenging situations. It’s about expanding the nervous system's tolerance and adaptability through small, intentional experiences of growth.
• Dysregulation - Dysregulation occurs when the nervous system is stuck in states of fight, flight, freeze, or shutdown. It manifests as heightened anxiety, emotional overwhelm, or disconnection and requires mindful practices to return to a balanced state.

This episode dives into the ups and downs of healing and why it can sometimes feel like you’re moving backward instead of forward. Sarah breaks down how coming back into our bodies is a marker of progress — but that it can also feel overwhelming at first. Experiencing grief, anger, or other deep emotions can all be signs of the work you’ve done.

With real-life examples and simple, science-backed advice, Sarah shares how to move beyond just “knowing” about your patterns and into healing in a way that actually creates change. You’ll learn how to regulate your nervous system, work with your younger parts, and create space for more connection and joy.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:40 Why Healing Can Feel Like You’re Going Backward

05:34 Information Gathering is Not Enough

07:29 Why We Become Disembodied

11:03 Healing is the Hero’s Journey

15:31 Trauma & Energy Wells

21:33 What To Look For in a Therapist or Practitioner

31:20 Receiving & Working With Young Parts

38:00 Why Do We Experience Chronic Dysregulation?

42:56 Sarah’s Journey

 Join Sarah’s Email Community:

Looking for more FREE resources? Click below to join Sarah’s email community for additional teachings and somatic tools to support you on your healing journey.

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Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

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Important Keywords:

• Nervous system - The nervous system is a self-protective system that determines your emotions, behaviors, and overall experience. It responds to safety, real threats, and perceived threats, influencing how you react and regulate in different situations.
• Regulation - We can only experience regulation when our nervous system believes we are safe. Our primary state of regulation is our Ventral Vagal Complex, where we experience things like joy, connection, presence, groundedness, and feeling “here.”
• Trauma - Trauma refers to overwhelming experiences that the body and mind were unable to process fully at the time they occurred. These unresolved energies get stuck and stored in the body, impacting mental and physical well-being until they are resolved.
• Healing - Healing is the journey of addressing past wounds—both physical and emotional—to achieve greater freedom and alignment in life. It involves learning to regulate the nervous system, release stored trauma, and tending to younger parts of ourselves.
• Dysregulation - Dysregulation occurs when the nervous system believes we are in danger, whether it is a real or perceived threat. Chronic dysregulation is often a result of unresolved trauma and can significantly impact daily functioning.
• Internal Safety - Creating safety within our bodies and nervous system is the foundation of healing. This is what we are working toward when we take steps to regulate our nervous system.

In this heartfelt episode of You Make Sense, Sarah explores the often-overlooked emotional complexities of the holiday season. While the holidays are often painted as a time of joy and togetherness, Sarah acknowledges the undercurrent of loneliness, grief, and stress that many experience. She unpacks how societal expectations and past experiences can amplify these emotions, offering relatable insights and actionable tools to help listeners navigate this season with more ease.

Sarah delves into the somatic roots of grief and loneliness, using Parts Work to differentiate between our adult self and younger parts. From tending to these younger parts to finding solace in music, nature, and intentional connection, this episode offers a blueprint for transforming holiday challenges into opportunities for healing and self-discovery.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

02:09 Reasons the Holidays Can Be Challenging

06:58 Connecting to the Unmet Need

09:05 Why We Struggle to Process Grief

13:34 Step 1: Grief is Best Processed Through Connection

15:06 Step 2: What Parts of You Are Struggling?

15:45 Step 3: Focus on Nourishing Yourself

17:03 Step 4: Connection

19:42 Identify Which Part of You is Feeling Sad

30:46 How to Process Death and Loss

39:50 Coupling Dynamics & the Holidays

49:42 “Why Do I Drink More Around My Family?”

  Join the Navigating Your Nervous System Waitlist:

Want access to limited-time pricing for Sarah’s upcoming 6-week course? Make sure to get on the waitlist for Navigating Your Nervous System by January 5th to take advantage of the 24-hour only $100 off bonus.

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Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

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Important Keywords:

• Loneliness - Loneliness is the feeling of being disconnected or isolated from others, often heightened during the holidays when societal messages emphasize togetherness. Sarah highlights how loneliness can stem from unmet needs, relational trauma, or past experiences and encourages using somatic tools and Parts Work to address it.
• Grief - Grief is the emotional response to loss, encompassing not only what happened but also what never was. Sarah explains how grief surfaces when we feel safe enough to process it and encourages gentle, titrated processing of these emotions to create space for healing and growth.
• Connection - Connection is a fundamental human need that fosters a sense of belonging and emotional safety. Sarah emphasizes the importance of cultivating meaningful connections with others, nature, and ourselves, as these relationships are key to navigating emotional challenges.
• Parts work - Parts work is a therapeutic approach that acknowledges and tends to different aspects of the self, particularly younger parts carrying past wounds. Sarah discusses how identifying and comforting these parts can bring clarity and healing during emotionally challenging times.
• Regulation - Regulation is the process of bringing the nervous system into safety and balance, allowing us to respond to situations from a calm, grounded place. Sarah suggests somatic practices such as mindfulness, movement, and connection to achieve regulation and build emotional resilience.
• Healing - Healing is the process of addressing past traumas, unmet needs, and emotional pain to create space for growth and well-being. Sarah frames healing as an ongoing journey of self-compassion, connection, and transformation, particularly relevant during challenging emotional periods.

Do you find romantic partnerships challenging, confusing, or overwhelming? Sarah is going to walk you through what is necessary to heal your attachment wounds and come toward more secure, healthy relationships. Although it might seem counterintuitive, the kind of connection we’re desiring often doesn’t “feel good” at first. In fact, our first experience of a secure attachment can range from being boring — to completely terrifying.

The good news is that this doesn’t necessarily mean the relationship is wrong for you! In this episode, you’ll learn the neuroscience behind why healthy love can initially feel overwhelming or unexciting. But the more that we step toward safe connection, the deeper and more intimate our relationships become, giving us a container where we can truly be seen, known, and chosen.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

01:01 Earned Secure Attachment

06:12 The Good Doesn’t Feel Good at First

08:45 Why A Secure Attachment Can Feel Boring

10:08 Love from Choice vs Love from Survival

16:33 Why A Secure Attachment Can Feel Terrifying

24:00 Leaning into a Secure Attachment

29:40 “Why Do I Feel Like I’m Going Backwards?”

30:52 Building Capacity for Vulnerability and Exposure

35:06 The Beautiful Orphaned Parts of Us

39:43 How to Know if the Lack of Attraction is Normal

46:37 Regret Is an Opportunity for Self-Compassion & Learning

52:01 Perceived Threats in Relationships

01:06:01 Even with Loving Parents, Relationships Can Be Hard   

Grab Sarah’s FREE Workbook:

Ready to gain control over your life? Click below to download Sarah’s free trauma-informed workbook. This in-depth guide will help you to harness the power of your nervous system and unlock your desires.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

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Important Keywords:

• Secure Attachment - A safe, stable way of attaching and relating to others in our relationships that forms in our early childhood from having caregivers who could consistently meet our needs for love, safety, attunement, and connection. 
• Earned Secure Attachment - A secure attachment that develops through intentional self-work and healing from past patterns. It reflects personal growth and the ability to attract healthier relationships by creating internal safety for yourself and your younger parts.
• Neuroception - Your body's internal threat detector that is constantly assessing whether you’re in safety, danger, or life-threatening danger. It decides this by looking to a database of past information that holds all your lived experiences.
• Parts Work - A therapeutic process that involves connecting with and healing younger parts of yourself that hold onto past wounds. It’s a core tool for building internal safety and reshaping how you show up in relationships.
• Trauma Bond - A strong emotional connection formed through cycles of highs and lows in an unstable relationship. Often mistaken for love, trauma bonds are rooted in survival instincts and unresolved past pain.
• Protective Parts - Younger parts that learned to keep you from past emotional harm by creating walls, avoidance, control, or sabotage. Even if the past is over, these well-intentioned parts can keep you from fully engaging in healthy relationships.
• Capacity Building - The process of gradually expanding your emotional tolerance for safety, love, and connection. It involves learning to sit with discomfort as you adjust to the steady, healthy love you’ve always wanted.

This episode pulls back the curtain on how our “younger selves” often influence the way we show up in our adult lives. From the perfectionist to the procrastinator, these protective parts develop in response to early or past experiences of feeling unsafe or overwhelmed. If we have yet to come to the aid of these parts, they will continue to show up in an effort to keep our vulnerable parts safe, often keeping us stuck in cycles that no longer serve us.

Using science-backed concepts and practical tools, Sarah guides listeners on how to recognize and calm these parts so that our adult selves can take charge. By differentiating ourselves from these parts, unburdening these protectors, and coming to the aid of the vulnerable part they are protecting, it’s possible to start living in alignment with our highest self—and navigate the world with more freedom.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:16 Are Your Young Parts Running the Show?

01:10 Understanding Somatic Parts Work

06:10 The Power of Internal Coregulation

07:43 What is a Protector Part?

09:08 The Doer Part

15:23 The Perfectionist Part

21:21 The Procastinator Part

28:18 Adult Life Can Be Overwhelming

30:18 Building Capacity to Be in Your Adult Self

32:24 Unburdening the Protector Parts

35:07 Supporting the Most Vulnerable Part

37:52 “How Do We Know How Many Parts There Are?”

44:36 Learning to Differentiate From Your Parts

51:29 Why Do We Experience Roadblocks?

Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:

Ready to learn more about your nervous system specific to you? Take Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck?” for a personalized guide and powerful somatic tools to help you gain control over your experience.

 https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Parts Work - A therapeutic approach that involves understanding and working with different “parts” of oneself, especially those that have been influenced by past experiences or trauma.
• Most Vulnerable Parts - Younger versions of ourselves that fragment off when we experience trauma, harm, or overwhelm and essentially get “stuck” in that painful experience until we can come to their aid as our adult self.
• Protector Parts - These are also  younger versions of ourselves that develop as a way to keep the most vulnerable part safe, often through controlling behaviors, avoiding risks, or overachieving to make sure the vulnerable part never has to feel that pain again.
• Internal Co-Regulation - A process of self-soothing, where the adult self learns to comfort and integrate these young parts, providing them with the care and safety they lacked in the past.
• Neuroception - The brain’s subconscious detection of safety or threat, which shapes how we react to situations based on internal “safety” signals and past memories.
• Internal Family Systems (IFS) - A therapeutic model often referenced in Parts Work, which sees the self as made up of multiple parts, each with its own role, memory, and emotional state.

This episode uncovers the hidden roles we carry in relationships—roles that often date back to our earliest experiences and shape how we connect with others. From being the “caretaker” to the “perfectionist,” these familiar patterns tend to influence our choices and interactions long after childhood, even if that role no longer serves us.

With tools grounded in neuroscience and practical guidance, this conversation dives into what it takes to rewrite those outdated scripts. Listeners will learn simple steps to heal the past, break free from conditioned reactions, and start building relationships that align with who they truly are. It’s absolutely possible to embody a new role and make room for the connections that genuinely feel right.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:33 Why Do We Play the Roles We Play?

02:19 Family Systems & the Origin of Our Roles

07:13 Secure Attachment & Healthy Family Plays

10:19 Many of Us Did Not Have a Healthy Family System

13:57 Choosing Partners & “Compatability” 

17:21 Healing Allows us to Write a New Role

21:45 The Bumpy Road of Healing

27:59 “How Can You Get Comfortable in Receiving When You’re a Giver?”

39:06 Being of Service vs. Being of Sacrifice

46:44 Why We Disconnect from Our Emotions

54:16 “How Do You Forgive?”

Waitlist Bonus Coming in 2025:

Ready to start feeling better in the New Year? Navigating Your Nervous System is a 6-week, live course focused on the most important foundation of healing: nervous system regulation. 

Join the NYNS waitlist by January 5th for limited-time reduced pricing! 

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Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

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Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Nervous System - The nervous system is central to understanding our emotional and relational patterns. It holds the embodied experience of past memories and influences how we respond to others, shaping the roles we play in our lives.
• Roles - The patterns we adopt in relationships, often influenced by early family dynamics. Common roles include caretaker, perfectionist, scapegoat, and the helpless one, which define how we interact with others. Changing these roles allows us to step out of limiting patterns and embrace more fulfilling connections.
• Family System - The family system is the foundation of our relational blueprint. It establishes our initial roles and influences how we navigate social dynamics, often carrying over into adult relationships.
• Attachment - Attachment refers to the emotional bonds formed with primary caregivers, impacting how we relate to others. Secure attachment fosters healthier relationships, while insecure attachment can lead to self-protective behaviors and dynamics. Healing attachment wounds enables us to build stable, supportive connections.
• Healing - Healing is the process of releasing old roles and expanding the nervous system’s capacity for change. It involves recognizing and shedding survival patterns and replacing them with practices that honor our true selves. Healing is an empowering journey toward self-discovery and authentic relationships.
• Patterns - Patterns are recurring behaviors that shape how we interact with others. These automatic responses often stem from unresolved past experiences and can hold us back. Using a somatic approach to transform these patterns is key to stepping into new roles and fostering growth.

Ever feel like stepping into a bigger life is tougher than it should be? In this episode, Sarah breaks down why we get stuck in old patterns and how our nervous system shapes the life we’re currently living. You’ll learn why even good changes—like deeper relationships or exciting career moves—can feel overwhelming or lead to self-sabotage. 

Using science-backed concepts and tools, Sarah will teach you how to practically build your nervous system’s capacity to hold the life you’re really wanting. By taking small, tolerable steps and working at the rate of your most apprehensive part, it’s possible to work with your nervous system to move toward a life full of connection and joy.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:32 Living the Bigger Life

06:19 The Process of Building Our Capacity

13:42 Our Purpose Often Leads to Our Healing

17:39 What Lights You Up?

19:36 How to Begin Working with Your Nervous System

23:38 We Must Embody Where We Are Going

28:05 One Tolerable Step at a Time

30:49 There’s Always Room to Expand and Grow

36:45 What to do When Good Opportunities Overwhelm Us

41:29 Tangible Steps Toward Being Seen

Grab Sarah’s FREE Workbook:

Ready to gain control over your life? Click below to download Sarah’s free trauma-informed workbook. This in-depth guide will help you to harness the power of your nervous system and unlock your desires.

 https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• “Self-Sabotage” - This term can often feel shaming, but it is simply the nervous system’s way of protecting us from what it doesn’t yet know is safe by pushing away or leaving things we might actually deeply desire.
• Building Capacity - The gradual process of training the nervous system to hold more of the “good” in life and tolerate changes or stressors without triggering overwhelm. This is done by gently stepping toward new, safe experiences of what was once dangerous or inhibited in the past (like: being seen, taking up space, making mistakes, etc.).
• Nervous System Regulation - Techniques and strategies used to calm and stabilize the nervous system. Regulation helps move the body out of a fight/flight, freeze, or shut down responses and into a balanced state of presence and connection.
• “The Invisible Wall” - A term coined by Sarah used to describe what it feels like when we try to step toward what we’re wanting but are met with resistance and dysregulation within our nervous system.
• Parts Work - This approach seeks to integrate the fragmented younger parts of ourselves by coming to their aid and giving them love, safety, attunement, and connection. Under the umbrella of Parts Work, Internal Family Systems is the most well-known modality.
• Tolerable Steps - Small, bite-sized actions taken to gradually introduce new experiences and reduce the nervous system's stress response. These steps are essential for building internal safety and making sustainable progress toward larger goals.

Although we may look our numeric age on the outside, we actually have many different parts or versions of ourselves within us. Using somatic Parts Work, also known as IFS or inner child healing, Sarah is going to show you how these different parts can inhabit our experience to influence the way we show up in our daily lives.

When we come to the aid of these younger parts and give them the love, safety, attunement, and protection they didn’t receive in the past, it creates what Sarah calls internal co-regulation, so that we can begin spending more time moving through the world as our confident, capable adult self.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:23 What is Parts Work?

04:37 Holistic Healing is Like a Web

09:35 Each Part Has a Different Autonomic Tone

16:17 Vulnerable Parts and Protective Parts

22:44 Real Life Examples of Parts Show Up in Our Lives

28:21 The Difference Between Young Parts and Adult Self

33:34 How Do We Bring Together Fragmented Parts?

37:20 All Parts of You Make Sense

39:49 Focus on the Loudest Part First

43:11 How to Deal with Multiple Parts Without Feeling Overwhelmed

49:41 Two Ways to Create Internal Safety

01:00:12 A Common Misconception About Real Love

Join Sarah’s Email Community:

Want more somatic tools straight to your inbox? Click below to join Sarah’s email community for weekly teachings and additional resources.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-newsletter

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Parts Work - The therapeutic practice of differentiating from and coming to the aid of the younger parts of ourselves that fragment off of us and develop when we’ve experienced a trauma or overwhelm in the past. Under the umbrella of Parts Work, Internal Family Systems is the most well-known modality.
• Younger Part - This is any part that is younger than what our current numeric age is now. It can be a vulnerable part or a protective part.
• Most Vulnerable Part - This is a younger part that experienced a trauma or overwhelming event(s) where they were left helpless, unsupported and unsafe and remain stuck in the perpetual pain of that experience.
• Protective Part - This is often a younger part of us that developed in order to protect the most vulnerable parts from that pain, and might look like being “the do-er,” perfectionism, procrastination, etc.
• Nervous System Regulation - The process of managing the body's stress response and guiding your self-protective system to internal safety, which helps to resolve trauma, promote balance and wellbeing, and navigate life’s challenges with greater ease.
• Regulating Resource: Tools or activities that discharge or get rid of activation in the body, helping to bring our system back into safety, rest, and regulation.
• Trauma Resolution: The process of healing from past trauma by addressing and releasing trapped energy and incomplete physical responses from the body.
• Embodiment: The practice of being fully present in and connected to your body and the sensations and feelings present within it, which is crucial for nervous system regulation and emotional healing.

Ever wonder why you keep choosing the same kind of partners? Sarah breaks it all down in this episode. She’s going to teach you how your nervous system is the one doing the matchmaking, drawing on your early childhood experiences to inform the way you show up in your adult relationships. Whether it’s romantic partnerships, friendships, or work dynamics, you’ll learn how to begin changing old patterns that no longer serve you.

Many of us choose our partners out of a need for survival rather than from a place of choice. Sarah will give you powerful somatic tools to begin creating a new internal baseline for what love is, so that you can transform your relationships and step toward the secure attachments you’re desiring.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:17 Why We Choose the Partners that We Choose

03:30 Your Early Childhood Experiences Lay the Blueprint

07:30 The Threat Detector Picks Up On Subtle Cues

10:16 Love From Choice or Love From Survival?

14:39 Healthy Love Isn’t Infatuation

19:21 Creating an Internal Secure Attachment

21:25 Our Reactions Always Match Some Circumstance

27:29 Developing the Ability for Self-Regulation

31:43 We Can be a Combination of Different Attachment Styles

37:00 Building Connection When Feeling Isolated

Take Sarah’s FREE Quiz:

Ready to learn more about your nervous system specific to you? Take Sarah’s free quiz, “What’s Keeping You Stuck?”, for personalized tools to regulate your nervous system and step toward the life you’re desiring. Get started below.

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-quiz

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Autonomic Nervous System - The body’s internal network that controls responses to stimuli and regulates our experiences of safety, fear, and connection. In the context of relationships, it drives automatic reactions based on past experiences stored in our internal "database."
• Neuroception - A subconscious process through which the nervous system detects safety or threats in our environment. It plays a key role in determining who we are drawn to in relationships, often based on past relational patterns.
• Attachment - Refers to the emotional bond we form with others, shaped by early relationships, particularly with caregivers. Our attachment style influences how we relate to others.
• Parts Work - A therapeutic process focused on identifying and healing the different "parts" of ourselves that were wounded in the past. It helps us reparent those parts and create internal safety, allowing us to make healthier relationship choices.
• Internal Safety - The feeling of security and stability that comes from within, rather than from external validation or relationships. Cultivating internal safety helps reduce anxiety and allows for more balanced, healthy relationships.
• Healing Work - The ongoing process of addressing past traumas and emotional wounds to create lasting change in our relational patterns and lives.
• Relationship Patterns - Recurring behaviors and dynamics that emerge in our relationships, often based on unresolved past experiences. Recognizing and changing these patterns is key to fostering healthier connections.

Ready to take a deep dive into understanding your relationships? Sarah breaks down the connection between Polyvagal Theory and Attachment Theory, explaining how your autonomic nervous system shapes the way you show up in your romantic partnerships, friendships, family, job, finances, and more. Healing attachment wounds isn’t something you can simply “talk” your way into—it must be addressed somatically at the nervous system level.

Through relatable examples, you’ll learn about the different attachment styles—anxious, avoidant, and disorganized—and how each one is a brilliant, adaptive response to our early childhood experiences. Whether you're stuck in difficult patterns or seeking a deeper understanding of your relationships, this episode is packed with actionable tools to guide you toward an earned secure attachment and healthier, more meaningful connections.

Episode Highlights

00:00 Intro

00:15 The Connection Between Polyvagal Theory and Attachment Theory

03:53 The Origin of How We Relate to Others

09:44 Anxious Attachment Style

19:58 Avoidant Attachment Style

25:58 Disorganized Attachment Style

31:08 Secure Attachment Style

38:47 What Attachment Style Does the Flight Response Connect To?

44:19 How Do Somatic Practices Help in Healing Attachment Wounds?

49:03 Some Things Can Only Be Healed in a Relational Dynamic

56:04 Growing Up with Narcissistic Family Members

01:02:43 The Process of Healthy Aggression 

Download Sarah’s FREE Workbook:

Looking for tools to help you start feeling better? Download Sarah’s free workbook, “How To Gain Control Over How You Feel,” to learn more about trauma’s role in keeping you stuck and how to begin healing at the nervous system level.

Click here to download your copy:

https://bit.ly/yms-sp-workbook

Connect with Sarah on:

Website - https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/sarahbcoaching/

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/Sarahbaldwincoaching/

Submit a Question:

https://sarahbaldwin1.typeform.com/podcast

Important Keywords:

• Polyvagal Theory - A scientific theory coined by Stephen Porges that explains how the autonomic nervous system controls our reactions to stress and connection.
• Attachment Theory - A psychological model that explains how early relationships with caregivers shape our ability to form healthy emotional bonds. 
• Nervous System Regulation - The process of calming or balancing the nervous system to achieve emotional and physical stability. This is crucial for managing stress and maintaining healthy relationships.
• Anxious Attachment Style - An “insecure” or adaptive attachment style where we feel safer when others are close and less safe when we’re alone.
• Avoidant Attachment Style - An “insecure” or adaptive attachment style where connection or closeness may feel overwhelming, even though a part of us deeply desires connection.
• Disorganized Attachment Style - An “insecure” or adaptive attachment style where we may want people close, but when they are close, we will reflexively push them away and then desire closeness again.
• Somatics - Therapeutic tools used to address emotional struggles and trauma by healing it in the body, aiming to restore balance to the nervous system.