176: How to begin healing shame with A.J. Bond

• The origins of shame all the way back in our childhoods
• What kinds of shame really are helpful in our lives
• How to heal from toxic shame so we don't pass it on to our own children

  AJ's book: Discomfortable: What is shame and how can we break its hold? (Affiliate link)  

Taming Your Triggers 

 

Jump to highlights

(02:05) How AJ Bond get started on understanding what shame is (05:12) What is shame? (07:15) Different versions of shame for different people (08:10) Shame is like an alarm system (10:39) The breaking of the interpersonal bridge (15:48) What does good repair look like (18:45) The rupture and repair make the relationship stronger (25:41) The cultural evolution aspect and how we evolved to be around the same pretty small group of people for a lot of the time (26:58) Shame will often feel like it’s connected to survival (31:09) Are there common reactions that people have when they're feeling when they're experiencing shame? (34:18) The concept of healthy shame (37:19) The 123 Punch of Shame (47:03) How our unconscious values show up in the context of our conscious and chosen values  

References

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