TPP 374: Penn & Kim Holderness Talk About How ADHD is Awesome in Love & in Life

I’ve been a longtime fan of Kim and Penn Holderness, who I’ve had a parasocial relationship with for years as I love to consume and share their funny music videos, vlogs, and skits. And in more recent years, it’s exciting to see them talking openly and with humor and authenticity about Penn’s ADHD and how together, Kim and Penn navigate their marriage and raising kids in their mixed neurotype household.

All that say, I loved having a chance to sit down with Kim and Penn to talk about their brand new book, out next week, called ADHD is Awesome: A Guide to (Mostly) Thriving with ADHD, which they wrote because they are on a mission to reboot how we think about ADHD by taking us inside their ADHD world, and all highs, lows, and moments in between. I think what I loved about their book, and this conversation, the most is that Kim and Penn are real and open about how beautiful, and yes, messy, it can be to navigate family life as a person with ADHD or as someone married to an ADHDer. And so in today’s conversation, that’s what we hear about — how Penn has learned to hack himself to manage his ADHD-related challenges, the ways in which ADHD has enriched their family life, how Kim has reframed her thinking and approach to support Penn’s executive function challenges and be an “ADHD whisperer” while also taking care of her own emotional and mental well-being.

After listening to this episode, I highly recommend you go to their Instagram or YouTube and check out their content. Their first book together, Everybody Fights, about how couples can fight better and end your arguments feeling closer, more loved, and better understood, came out in 2021. The book we’re talking about today, ADHD is Awesome, comes out April 30.

About Kim and Penn Holderness

Kim and Penn Holderness have been married for sixteen years. For seven of those years, they have chronicled their marriage and their family with funny music videos, vlogs, skits, and a podcast. Their videos have resulted in over a billion views and 4.5 million followers across social media.

Penn and Kim honed their storytelling skills with twenty-five combined years in the TV news business. Today, they own their own company, Holderness Family Productions, where Kim is Chief Executive Officer and Penn is Chief Creative Officer.

As well as creating content for their channels, they also work alongside brands and agencies to shape product launches and marketing campaigns. Their book about improving communication in marriage was released March 30, 2021.

Penn and Kim live in Raleigh, North Carolina, with their children, Lola and Penn Charles, and fluffy dog, Sunny.

Things you'll learn from this episode

• How Penn navigated being diagnosed with ADHD in college and how that impacted his understanding of self and identity
• The power of “operation mindset shift” and reframing ADHD traits as strengths
• How Kim came to understand how Penn’s brain wiring impacted his executive functioning
• How Penn has “hacked” himself to manage his ADHD symptoms and challenges
• The power of empathy, comfort, and connection when navigating a mixed neurotypes relationship
• What some of the “upsides” are for friends and family members of people with ADHD

Resources mentioned for How ADHD is Awesome in Love & in Life

• The Holderness Family
• ADHD is Awesome: A Guide to (Mostly) Thriving with ADHD by Kim and Penn Holderness
• The Holderness Family Podcast
• ADHD is Awesome Book Trailer (YouTube)
• Everybody Fights: So Why Not Get Better At It? by Kim and Penn Holderness
• Dr. Ned Hallowell
• Dr. Ned Hallowell on How Parents Can Best Support Their Children with ADHD (Tilt Parenting podcast)
• Dr. Emily King
• Learn with Dr. Emily (podcast)
• ADHD 2.0: New Science and Essential Strategies for Thriving with Distraction - from Childhood Through Adulthood by Dr. Ned Hallowell
• Driven to Distraction: Recognizing and Coping with Attention Deficit Disorder from Childhood through Adulthood by Dr. Ned Hallowell and Dr. John Ratey

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